She felt like he was trying to swallow her whole. His mouth on hers with long, deep kisses, his weight nearly crushing her, but it seemed like no matter what she allowed it wasn't enough.
When she let him push her head to the side and attack her neck, when she let him pull her hair until she hissed at the sensation, when she let her own mind go in strategic retreat as his hand moved over her chest and palmed her breast...
They were being followed.
Light hadn't told her this, she'd noticed it herself. She thought it likely L had all the members of the police being tailed as well as immediate family members. It made sense, but it was a declaration of mistrust that would be heard when the truth came out. The officers wouldn't be happy once they learned of what had happened, some might even bow out of the investigation.
She was walking today. She'd done an outdoor shoot not far from home and had waved away the offers of a ride from the woman she'd worked with, Amane, Misa, assuring her that she would be fine on her own.
"Okay! Misa was glad to work with you, Haruka-chan, and hopes to see you again soon!"
Well, maybe calling her a 'woman' was a bit much. She seemed much more like a bubbly teenager than an adult despite the fact that she was almost two years Haruka's senior. Then again, appearances could be deceiving. Who knew what might lie beneath the facade of an excitable model?
She wondered if Amane could be hiding something as crazy as she was, but decided against it. Her life was on another level altogether. At the moment she was tempted to go elsewhere, but her family would worry if she didn't return and that might raise suspicion.
Haruka thought it an incredible, and strange, twist of fate that no one had noticed anything odd about her. Their father could be excused, he was rarely home at all, but neither her mother nor Sayu had a clue what was going on with the other children in the household.
"Light," there he was, leaning against the lamppost. "Hey, did you come to meet me?"
He nodded, glanced over her shoulder, but made no comment.
She knew he was aware of the stalkers, but he hadn't said anything about it and she kept her knowledge to herself. She was unsure if he thought she was conscious of their follower, but it didn't really matter. Out in public like this he kept his distance.
"I think I'll be going out tomorrow."
"Really? That's nice."
And she meant that from the bottom of her heart. He would spend the day out, far away from her, and she would take a mental vacation if she could just stop remembering...
He'd told her to wait for him while he returned to the dinning room. They'd only been gone for fifteen minutes, but she was in no state to be seen by family members. Light was less disheveled than she; as long as no one looked too closely they wouldn't suspect a thing.
It was a struggle to stay on the bed, to keep from snooping, but he would know if she touched so much as the spine of a book. She knew about the piece of paper in his doorway and the particular way he left the handle, but that was the extent of her knowledge. She was sure he had similar traps within the bedroom.
At his desk, for example, she noted that he'd left the key in the lock of the top drawer. To someone else it might have looked careless, but Light had never been inattentive. That key was there for a reason, likely to test the will of those who entered his room. No doubt there was something innocuous inside the drawer, he'd never put something he cared about within easy reach of others, but it was enough to call attention.
She wouldn't put it past him to apply reverse psychology to his methods though.
Whatever the case she didn't think it safe to touch anything and remained where she was, trying to clear her head enough to come up with a better plan...
Home again they were greeted at the door by their mother who fluttered nervously from one child to the other. She had not acclimated to the new dynamic in the household well. After the argument over dinner the atmosphere had become tense and the strain remained over the days that had passed since.
There was no consensus on Haruka's declaration. Sayu was in shock, Soichiro furious, Light resigned, and Sachiko in a muddled state of mind.
When their son had returned he explained that he'd not known about this part of Haruka's thoughts on her future and said that she seemed set on following through. He promised to continue trying to talk her out of moving, but made no guarantees. They were all well aware of Haruka's stubborn nature, but hoped her brother would be able to get through to her.
He'd returned upstairs following that debriefing, to talk to Haruka they all assumed, and they were left to debate over what could be going on in her head.
"Dinner will be on the table in about twenty minutes," she told them as they traveled up the staircase. Light replied with his usual good humor while Haruka barely nodded.
With a sigh Sachiko returned to the kitchen. There was nothing for her to do but hope that Light could bring his sister to her senses. There was nothing she could say, nothing that would change her mind, but maybe her daughter would take the advice of her twin.
The two had always been close, save the last few months, and she'd never been more glad for that connection. Where the rest of them failed to understand Haruka, Light could see to the heart of the matter.
Surely he would be able to persuade her to at least rethink leaving home.
"Moving out?" Sachiko asked aloud with a sigh. "I really don't know what she could be thinking!"
It was something she knew was on the horizon, the day her children left home, but she hadn't expected it to come so soon or that one of the girls would be the first to leave.
Truthfully this wasn't so far outside the realm of possibility that she thought it impossible; Haruka displayed initiative at the strangest times, often leaving a trail of confusion in her wake. The things she thought important had always varied from that of the family.
Well, Light was on her case and his influence could do no harm, or so she thought. Had Sachiko been aware of what had actually happened when Light returned to his bedroom that night, had she had even an inkling as to what her perfect son had started, she may well have found herself in a casket...
On his way up the stairs he pointedly ignored the incessant chatter of the shinigami who followed after him; Ryuk felt compelled to comment on everything from Haruka's moving away to the unnatural flush on the face of the Death Note user.
"I didn't think you'd actually try it. I'm not for or against this, not really, but it is interesting!"
He found Haruka where he'd left her, lying still on the bed. Her blouse was partiality unbuttoned, her hair a tangled mess and her lips bruised.
He knew she'd heard him enter, but she remained motionless and he used the opportunity to calculate their chances of getting away with a sexual relationship.
It was unlikely that their family would suspect anything was amiss without a serious misstep and that was where his concerns laid. He doubted Haruka would give it away, but had he missed something? Was there an unknown factor involved?
He didn't think so. On the off chance someone did become suspicious he would take care of them before it became a problem.
Confident in his ability to keep the situation in hand, Light returned his attention to the girl on his bed.
"Twins," he murmured as he moved toward her. "We've always been together." He reached out, touched her cheek and watched as her eyes fluttered. "You came second to be with me."
"You came second to be with me."
That was what he thought of her? It worked to her advantage, but was unexpected. The way he was able to turn everything she did into a reflection on himself made it seem as if he had a god complex. It also heightened her worry that he could have some link to Kira, but even now she couldn't think how it might be possible.
He had access to police records and it was conceivable that he could take advantage of that information, but still! How could he kill criminals from such a distance with a heart attack? How could anyone? Light didn't go anywhere but cram school and his time off was usually spent at home these days.
She had no proof except a rapid change in disposition that only she had noticed and that wasn't exactly convincing evidence.
Haruka was in her bedroom, she'd just finished uploading new pictures to her blog. The last few days had brought an influx of traffic because the girl she'd worked with earlier in the day, Amane, had posted her own updates to social media accounts about working with Haruka, proclaiming her excitement over meeting someone new.
If nothing else she was grateful for the exposure Misa offered. That day's shoot would be in a magazine, one that was popular; it was a first for the newcomer, but Misa had been in the business for a while and Haruka could remember having seen her on covers before.
"Misa would be glad to give you tips! Here, Misa will give you her number if she can have yours too!"
So, they'd exchanged cell numbers. Haruka wasn't sure what she'd ever want to call on Amane for, but it couldn't hurt to have that line of communication open.
With a deep sigh she looked to her door. He would soon come knocking, requesting her company. The family assumed he was busy trying to change her mind about moving, but the truth was they did very little speaking at all.
It was still a source of anxiety, but she'd come to terms with the new relationship. It was for the sake of the bigger picture and she had to stick it out. There was too much at stake here.
She was more convinced than ever that Light had something to do with the Kira incidents, yet still no definitive proof. She could pin her belief on nothing but an impression and she couldn't think of a way to make him drop hints without seeming like she was too interested.
If he was Kira he might kill her should she get too close to the truth.
The only way forward was to continue the ruse, pretend that she was just as in love with him as he'd deluded himself into thinking she was, and go along with their elicit meetings.
Nothing too intense had happened yet; it seemed even he had the sense not to cross the line, but he wasn't against heaving petting, encouraged the behavior in fact, and she worried that he would want more than she was willing to give sooner rather than later.
If there was one thing she could count on it was that Light would underestimate her. The demonstrated god complex demanded he believe himself superior and incapable of mistaking her feelings; as long as she could play the part he was expecting to see he would remain unaware of what she was after.
The knock came.
With shoulders squared she opened the door to face her brother and what she'd termed the 'sexy smirk'. It pained her to know that he could think to look at her in that way, but there was no other phrase for it. As much as she hated that it existed it functioned as a sign of his compliance. This was another chance to search for the older brother she'd once known.
"Haruka. Come to my room for a minute."
She was certain it would be longer than a minute.
He had her in his arms the second his door was locked. He stood holding her from behind, pressing kisses to her ear.
"I like your outfit today," he murmured. Tan shorts, thigh high plaid socks and a white cable knit sweater that hugged her curves. "But you've shown this to anyone willing to look. I wonder what else you're wearing, that no one but you has seen?"
One hand slid to her hip while the other moved to cover her mouth.
Alarm bells were ringing in Haruka's mind; something had changed. The atmosphere was heavy, oppressive, more so than it had ever been before. She'd been uncomfortable, to say the least, the last few days, but this was–
He kneaded her inner thigh, allowed his thumb to skim across the most intimate part of her and listened with satisfaction when she gasped.
"So, you felt that? This material, it's kind of thin. What are you wearing underneath? Let me see."
That was a demand, she knew it was, but how could she even begin to form coherent thoughts when he insisted on rubbing her there?
What is he getting out of this? she asked herself as her legs wobbled. Why do this?
She couldn't answer those questions without asking.
With shaking hands she reached for his arm, the one that held it's hand over her lips, and weakly tugged it away.
"Why?" She hadn't meant to sound breathless.
He dragged a nail across her core. "Why? Because you want me to."
She shook her head.
"Yes Haruka, you want this and so do I. Your body wants this, can't you feel how wet you are for me? I can."
She tried, and failed, to protest. A small part of her realized that he was partially correct; her body was responding to his touch, but that wasn't her fault! It was natural. He was wrong. She didn't want this, but how great would the danger be if she refused him?
If she could allow this, he would think her tied to him. He might even willingly give up information he would otherwise keep secret.
"I know," he paused, pushed her forward, allowed her to stumble. "There's no need to rush, Haruka. You're afraid I'll ask you for sex, right? Not yet. For now I just want to see what you're wearing." He crossed his arms. "So. What will you do, Imōto-chan?"
She'd known what she would do days ago, if it came to this point and she still needed to know more.
Haruka gathered her resolve and turned to face the monster inhabiting the body of her brother. Had they not been related, had she ever held any deeper feelings for him, she would have thought him incredibly attractive. In that moment everything about him screamed lust. The way his eyes raked over her, the way he stared, it was near pornographic. It was very clear what he wanted from her was obedience and she would give it to him for the moment.
Rather than answer aloud she hooked her thumbs into the waist band of her shorts and pulled them down, forcing her eyes to remain on his.
"Ah, black lace," he stepped closer and reached out for the hem of her shirt. "Do you know, I think red would suit you better, but this is fine." She held her arms up as he pulled the sweater over her head. "Matching." He did not miss the touch of fire that lit her eyes, though he did misinterpret it. "No one else has ever seen you this way, right?"
A dangerous tone, but she could answer honestly. "Right. No one but you, Light," she whispered. A step closer. She was moving on instinct as she fingered the buttons on his shirt.
"Not this time, Haruka," he took both her hands in one of his and forced her back until she fell upon his bed. "Today I'm going to make you moan, make you twist, for me." He sat beside her prone form, ran his hand up her side. His breath was hot against her cheek as he leaned closer. "You'll feel as you've never felt before and you will love me for it."
That was a clue. He was after her affection, but for what reason? She'd always loved him, he was her brother; there had to be more to it than that.
Coherent thought fled her mind he pressed his fingers against her center and he moved to kiss her stomach.
"Hey," she gasped. "Since when can you do things like this?"
"Does it matter? Do you like it?"
No. And yes. But, no. Emphatically no.
She reached for his hands as she shook her head.
"You little liar," he whispered, stretching out to lie beside her. He cupped her cheek. "You're so flawless."
A compliment. Did he really mean it?
"But you can't lie to me."
It had been worth a try.
She learned nothing more of value; even if he'd said anything enlightening she didn't think she would have understood it. As horrified as she was mentally, physically she'd been putty in his hands. Even now, several hours later, she felt weak. It had been a struggle to make it through supper; Light acted concerned when she excused herself from the table first, only to tilt on her way out the door, and 'helped' her upstairs.
"Haruka, maybe it was too much for you?" he'd whispered in her ear.
She wouldn't admit to that, but her stony glare amused him.
"...you will love me for it."
Thinking of it now, as she lay in her own bed, she wondered what he'd really meant. It wasn't just something he wanted, he'd been demanding it of her. He'd made her fall to pieces not to make her happy, but for himself.
"You're so flawless."
Implying that he was as well, she felt sure of that. He wouldn't have attributed that concept to her had she not been his twin.
Why did that matter to him? What good was flawless and why did he think he was?
It seemed like everything he did made her feel with more certainty that he was Kira, but she didn't have stable grounds to make that claim.
She sat up and balled her hands into tight fists while pulling her knees to her chest.
"This is bullshit," she hissed. "What the hell is he doing and how is he doing it?!"
The fact was she had no evidence to convict him excepting his incredible change of heart when it came to herself and in reality that wasn't something that couldn't happen on it's own; that kind of shift did not necessitate his being Kira. It was from the details, the ones no one else had observed, that her belief arose.
His huge ego for one. He was able to hide it with near perfection, but she knew it was there and growing as the days went by. Eating lunch with him had allowed her to see the way he looked down on everyone around them. He'd never been like that before. Light had always valued people who were trying their best, but it seemed like that didn't matter anymore. No one was good enough.
He also had access to confidential police information. Their father used the home server for work related files. She knew it was all password protected, but the code was probably mundane and easily guessed. She doubted it was something that could stop Light from finding his way in if he wanted to; their father wasn't exactly creative and he trusted them all implicitly which, if Light really was Kira, would pose a serious problem.
Dad would never suspect him, she thought. Not in a million years. No more than he'd suspect Sayu, Mom or I.
There was also his level of intelligence. Light was still in high school, but he could have gone on to college if he'd wanted to. No entrance exam would hold him back, this was a personal choice.
He'd wanted to join the police force; with his strong sense of justice he would have done unbelievably well. She wondered now if that same feeling had propelled him into the role of Kira, someone who'd been able to take justice into his own hands because he'd been granted the power to do so.
That was the real hole in her theory. The ability to kill from a distance with a heart attack. What was behind all of that? How was it possible?
Out of bed she sprang. There would be no sleeping tonight, at least not for a while yet, and she thought her time better spent in research.
"L, world's best detective..." she muttered as she typed in her search terms. As she'd expected there still wasn't much to find, but by widening the parameters she was able to learn about other detectives many believed to hold the number two and three rankings. "So, L takes cases he's interested in. This Eraldo Coil is high priced and Deneuve seems to deal in missing persons. But..." There wasn't much. Like L, there was a lack of contact information or specifics available. "Suspicious."
It couldn't be that they were actually–
"That is a leap of logic," she said softly. She had no reason to think they were actually one and the same, but the idea, once planted, refused to be uprooted. "Doesn't really matter though."
No, it didn't matter. Even if her intuition was right it only made L more incredible.
"I wish I could contact him." He would know what to do with her information, whether or not her observations meant anything. Surely he could use anything and everything available and her perspective was unique.
He'd ordered their family followed, so he was already collecting data on them.
Out of all the people in the police force, of all the family members she knew, she could think of no one who would be more suspicious than her brother. His intelligence and incontestable sense of justice, on display with the couple of times he'd helped the police force, should be enough to tip the scale in his direction and, if that was the case, it wouldn't be too long before their household was under more direct surveillance.
"Wire taps? Maybe cameras too."
She felt sure a deeper police investigation was on the horizon. Her father would agree to it, though only because he would be adamant that they had nothing to do with Kira and because of his dedication to his profession.
"Fun times," she rested her chin on her fist and sighed. Still, she thought those things a ways off; that gave her time to craft a message to L.
If you're reading this letter it means wiretaps have been put in place, likely cameras as well. I'm not surprised by it, but I think you should know that my brother is probably also aware of this. The truth is he's a lot smarter than I am, but I've always been better at looking to the future so I might have been a step ahead of him this time.
It would be best if you don't tell my father what's in this note (I'm assuming you're working together in some capacity).
This is disturbing to me on multiple levels, but let me start by saying I am reasonably confident that Yagami, Light, my older brother and twin, is Kira. I can't tell you how he commits the murders, but I can see changes in him. No one else seems to have noticed, but he's different with me, especially when we're alone (go ahead and take a guess at what that means, World's Greatest Detective-sama).
Maybe it was stupid of me, but I joined in the "game". As of right now he's unaware that I'm playing, he thinks he's leading me on and unless I make a huge mistake he won't realize the truth. He's too full of himself to imagine that I might be the one playing him.
You already know that he has access to confidential police data, that he's incredibly intelligent and that he seems perfect, but please believe me when I say that he is FAR from it. Though, I'm sure that in his mind he's perfection incarnate.
Maybe something has happened between now (for me) and now (for you), maybe everything is different and the case is closed, but I doubt it.
So, that's all I guess. I'm sorry I don't have anything but personal experience to give you, I'm trying to find out more, but he's very guarded and I don't think he wants anyone, not even me, to know the truth.
Haruka hid the letter in the central air vent that protruded from the area above her doorway. If a camera or microphone was to be placed it would go there, assuming there was only one; if they wanted to be thorough multiple placements would be made, but she thought her choice a safe bet.
By that time it was morning. She'd tried to sleep and settled for rest instead when dreams evaded her, considering her options. There wasn't much she could do except keep to the path in front of her.
"I'm going out today." That was what he said as he left the house.
"Ooo, on a date?" Sayu had asked.
"Yeah, actually," he'd looked to her then and she'd turned her head away, forced a pout, ignoring him as he smirked at her when the youngest sibling moved toward the kitchen.
"Mom! Did you hear that? Light's going on a date!"
Haruka saw him off at the door, accepted a quick kiss and then he disappeared out the gate. Her shoulders sagged with relief as he walked out of sight.
It would have been nice to look through his bedroom, but she didn't trust her ability to go undetected so, with no other options, she decided to spend the day thinking of anything but Light.
Her cell phone rang soon after his departure, a call from a friend asking if she had time to wander the shopping district. She agreed to the meet up and left the house at eleven fifteen in the outfit she'd worn on the night Light had... Taken it too far. She wondered if she would ever be able to associate the sweater with anything else.
"Nope," she muttered. "Not thinking about that. My clothes had nothing to do–" she paused with a gasp, her hands flying to her forehead. A pulsing pain rippled from temple to temple and she leaned heavily against a surrounding wall.
A hand, brown sleeve... A puddle of blood.
It was over as suddenly as it came. The throbbing faded and she quickly called home. Sayu picked up on the third ring.
"Hello? Yagami residence."
"Hey, Sayu, it's me. Sorry for calling, but I felt like I forgot something. Everything is okay there, right?"
"Ah, Haruka! Yeah, everything's fine!"
"Mom's okay too?"
"Yup," she popped the 'p'. "So, what did you think you forgot?"
She wracked her brain, but came up blank. "Uh, I don't know. Just be on the look out for something of mine and call if you find it."
"Okay, whatever. Later then!"
She called her father next.
"Yeah, uh, I was just wondering, what kind of jacket did you wear this morning?"
A sigh. "Haruka, I'm sorry, but I really don't have time for this."
"Sorry, sorry! Just tell me, was it brown?"
She stiffened. "Is it two shades of brown? Like darker near the wrist area? Also, are you planning on wearing it outside any time soon?"
"No Haruka, it is not two shades of brown and I don't think so. I'll likely be at Headquarters until this evening if not later."
"Oh. Well. That's good then. Stick to that plan, okay? Bye, Dad!"
She imagined him shaking his head as he put his mobile down, apologizing to his colleagues for the interruption. He'd definitely had her on speaker phone. If he got home in time for dinner he might question her, but it was worth the easing of her mind.
That left one family member, but Light hadn't worn a coat like one she'd seen and the hand was nothing like his. It wasn't Light lying on the road, but perhaps he was somehow involved?
She wished she'd thought to ask him where he was spending the day; as it was she didn't want to call him, that would seem desperate and he would definitely misread her intentions.
No. She would go on with the day and later, when they were home again and he came to bring her to his room, she would tell him of what she'd experienced. That would put a hold on whatever he had planned for her in the darkness of his bedroom and maybe by then she would know what she'd seen.
In an effort to put the vision behind her Haruka continued to the meeting point. Her friends were already there and their greetings enthusiastic. However, they hadn't been together long when she noticed a news broadcast airing on the television in the boutique they were pursuing.
"We interrupt the regularly scheduled program with breaking news. A bus-jacking incident has just been reported. It appears that the suspect was killed at the scene after being hit by a car..."
Humans existed before the shinigami.