Scarless

Chapter 7

My mouth was dry and my stomach was growling, I tried to ignore it since I was so tired but the surge of hunger kept waking me up. I shrugged it off and cuddle closer into the blankets and covered my face in the lemon smelling pillow. It was warm and so comfortable, I haven't slept so well in two years.

I turned my head and placed my cheek on the pillow again but it wasn't as soft as before. One of my eyelids slowly opened, I looked around and noticed that I wasn't in Bruce and Taylor's apartment but in the lair with the turtles. The thoughts of last night flooded my mind; Bruce touching me, the turtles saving me, Raph killing Bruce, me coming into Donnie's room and falling asleep in his bed. My skin grazed upon a piece of paper that was placed on the pillow and I looked down, it was a note on the yellow notepad paper.

I opened and read it:

"Dear Riley,

It was quite a surprise to see you sleeping with me in my bed when I woke up early this morning. When you find this note, come down to the kitchen to eat breakfast. We're going to have to talk to you about last night.

-Donnie"

I read the note again three times to make sure I understood everything correctly. Donnie's handwriting was so neat compared to the scribbles the most high schoolers wrote. The thing that bothered me the most was the last sentence that he wrote.

"We're going to have to talk to you about last night."

They wanted to talk about Bruce, I'm not ready for that. I can't tell them about my life at the Smiths apartment. all of the beatings and bruises, abuse, and the things that they said to me, and Bruce most of all.

I'm just not ready.

I pulled the blankets off my legs and looked around the room. A small light on the desk was shining, I walked over to it and looked at all of the papers. They were drawings of machines, blueprints, and theories. I narrowed my eyes and a piece of paper that was under all of the blueprints. I picked it up and smiled.

"What's this?" I muttered under my breath.

It was a drawing of a girl sleeping soundly, it was me. It was so beautiful, and had so much detail to it. I'm surprised it was me, Donnie must've sketched to look a little better than I normally do I guess. I placed it back where I found it, under all of the papers and mess as a glanced at the clock with neon green numbers.

"8:53."

This was one of the latest times that I slept in, I sighed and tied my hair back since it was such a mess when I slept in it. The smell that was radiating off me was starting to become unbearable, I needed to take a shower as soon as possible. Maybe I should ask Mikey if he could show me where the bathroom was so that I can clean up.

The lair was quiet when I open the door and looked around. No one was in the living room and the only sounds came from across the turtles' home, I followed them and was soon able to make out the sounds as grunts and groans groans. The doors from the room looked old and in Japanese-style was beautiful designs and colors. My fingertips touch the fabric before I opened one of the sliding doors.

"Leonardo, keep your back straight, do not let him distract you. Michelangelo, stay focused, do not look at Miss Matthews. Raphael, please wipe that smirk off of your face. Donatello, bend your knees, keep to the shadows if you must."

The sound of Splinter's stern voice filled the room, each of the turtles were fighting against each other, a one on one battle. Leo was against Mikey as Raph against Donnie. The floors were covered in mats, it made the room seem like a practice area for the ninjas, a training room or dojo to be exact.

"Good morning, Miss Matthews. Did you sleep well?" Splinter asked as he walked towards me.

I nodded to him, "Yes, thank you for asking. Um, I was wondering if someone could show me where the bathroom was. I really need to take a shower, if you don't mind..." I asked shyly as I stared at my feet, keeping my eyes off of the respectable rat.

"Leonardo?" He said as he looked toward the blue masked turtle. Leo quickly stopped fighting against Mikey, causing Mike to trip against his own foot. I stifled a small laugh by covering my mouth with my hand to make it look like a cough. The poor turtle fell on his face.

"Please, go and assist Miss Matthews if you will." Leo nodded and walked me out of the dojo, he was kind and quiet I'm like the way he was when we first met. He didn't keep his distance, he stayed close. It was an awkward the comfortable silence. In my mind, it's so confusing, and right at same time.

"I didn't dream up what happened last night, did I?" I whispered in a not really questioning way. I was making a statement, and in my mind, I knew what happened was true. Leonardo simply nodded, not completely ready to talk about it by himself. Neither was I. I sighed as Leo showed me where the bathroom was and left me behind to take a shower.

It felt so amazing and relaxing to be able to wipe and scrub off all of the dirt that have formed on my body for weeks. The water that I used turned to black from all the muck, the soap washed away the pungent smell.

My fingers traced over every bruise that the Purple Dragons had given me, they were an awful color of the next purples, blues, and yellows. My wrist stung while I rub them with soap, the scabs opened back up and bled. I bit the inside of my cheek as my sore body got clean. I don't know how long I took a shower, but I'm glad that I did.

I grabbed a towel off the rack and wrapped it around my body. My hair color changed from a dark brown to a soft chestnut color, my tan skin was actually a pale white that made my hazel eyes stick out.

"Shit." I mumbled under my breath. I needed to get from the bathroom to a few doors down in only a towel. I grabbed the clothes that I wore before and wrapped them in a ball. I took a deep breath and slightly jogged to across the highway, hoping no one would see me. Thank God, everyone was still in the dojo. I quickly got in and close the door behind me and started to dry myself off.

The bags I had brought with me will laid on top of the desk. Now that all the lights on, I was able to see the room that I woke up in completely. The walls are painted a light gray and there was a queen sized bed in the corner with the nightstand and lamp. A wardrobe stood tall across the room, it baffles and scared me how I thought it was Bruce in the middle of the night.

"What the hell am I going to tell them?" I whispered to myself as I pulled out clothes from my bag and quickly got dressed. I tied my hair into a French braid and put on warm socks. What was I going to say?

"Should I just say, Whoops! Sorry guys, you saved my life in all but I'm not a open book sooooo bye. God, I'm such a fucking idiot!" My hand collided with my forehead making a loud smack sound echo the bedroom.

Fuck it, was all the I thought.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, just fuck it all." I mumbled as I left the room and walked back to the living area. I didn't want to bother the turtles and their training so I just walked around until I found the kitchen. My stomach growled when I thought back to yesterday when Mikey made me breakfast and pancakes with eggs and hash browns and bacon and sausage and OH MY GOD MY MOUTH IS WATERING.

I ran my fingers through my side bangs as I searched for a bowl and spoon. The brothers that boxes and boxes of different kinds of cereal, I'm surprised they had so much food. How the hell do they get it? Do they dressed up in trench coats and fedoras to go grocery shopping? I'm sure it's something completely different. I shrugged my shoulders and grabbed the Lucky Charms with milk.

It felt nice eating calmly with enough food and not being worried about Bruce and Taylor yelling at me. According to law, foster parents were only required to feed twice a day, lunch and dinner. Breakfast was never given to me. Sure, they barley fed me anytime but it was least likely in the morning.

Bruce.

I felt like I swallowed a rock and it fell through my stomach.

"Hey Riley." I looked up and saw Mikey with a towel wrapped around his neck and dripping from head to toe in sweat. He had a soft smile plastered on his lips, his baby blue eyes were so light and full of shine unlike last night when they turned dark as Leo's. The small freckles splattered of his cheeks stood out along with his innocence and cheerfulness.

"Hey."

"Are you ok?"

"I'm...fine. Can we just...drop it? I don't want to talk about it." I looked away from the orange masked turtle and his pitiful smile. I gripped tightly to the spoon as if I was going to break it. Soon, one by one, the other turtles came in, all covered in sweat and breathing hard from training. I guess they heard the final sentence that I said.

"We can't just pretend we didn't see what we saw, toots." Raph said as he went to the refrigerator and grabbed a glass beer, just like how Bruce would. Sure, the turtles were all 20 from what Donnie told me, but seriously?

"Don't call me that..." I mumbled under my breath, Raph simply shrugged his shoulders and went back to drinking his poison. I could only imagine what he was like drunk and pray that I never was near him when it happens.

"Riles, we have to talk about what happened. We need to know, we need answers." Donnie said.

"I just can't...I'm not ready to explain everything." I stared at the empty bowl in front of me, I want to look at Donnie since I could feel his eyes looking at me. He sat down next my and scooted his chair close to me. His large green hand grabbed mine and squeezed it gently for comfort. I slowly gazed upon his soft brown eyes and felt so reassured.

"Just let us help, please."

I nodded.

"How about about I ask you simple questions, if you don't want to answer then I'll simply skip over them, okay? Would that be alright with you?"

I nodded again.

"Okay, who was the man?" My palms got sweaty and the back of my neck got cold, a sharp shiver ran down my spine like thick nails cutting flesh.

"Bruce. His name is Bruce Smith, or was." I whispered in such a small voice, that it would have been so embarrassing if I wasn't so shaken up.

"How do you know him?"

"He's my foster father."

"You don't have parents?"

I shook my head no and bit my bottom lip to stop myself from crying in front of Donnie. The turtles have seen me cry more than any other person that I've known and I only have known them for less than a week.

"Don't worry Riles, we can't fix this. We can fix everything.

"You can't fix scars, they're permanent. They last forever."


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