Disclaimer: I still don't own Narurto.
Idea from (Guest) Lilay Jurtor. Enjoy!
Prank: Tentacle Rape A.K.A 4zx76K.
Step One: Ask if his 'tentacles' are used for "specific reasons"
Step Two: Somehow get everyone in the Akatsuki to think that Kakuzu 'tentacle raped' me
Step three: Laugh my ass off for the rest if eternity
I grinned, now that I had Deidara somewhat on my side this prank would be perfect. Kakuzu would kill me indefinately for sure this time, but most of the Akatsuki should get a good laugh out of it. I started making a list of the things I would need.
Ratty and torn clothes to make it believable
Make-up for 'bruises'
Kunai for cuts (ouch)
"Hey Kakuzu..." I said from the doorway of the Akatsuki medical room. The brown skinned man turned to me, his green eyes filled with hatred. "What do you want?" He growled. I fingered my black hair, keeping my face carefully innocent and curious, "I was just wondering... what are your tentacles for?" I asked. He glared at me, "If you don't leave me alone, I'll rape you with them. Now go away!"
I tossed the flour bomb in the air a few times, comteplating if my life was really worth this prank. Shrugging I looked around the corner of the doorway and smiled. Kakuzu was facing away from me, bent over something. I weighed the flour bomb in my hand again, carefully calculating how much force it would require for me to make the bomb explode. Deciding what the heck, I threw the flour bomb at Kakuzu and cheered when it exploded, showing his entire back with the white powder. He stood slowly and turned to face me, his face so full of rage that I was terrified of him. Waving sheepishly I ran down the hall, it didn't take him long to follow. I screamed, and only half of it was pretend.
"Oh geez... not again." Hidan groaned, slapping a hand over his eyes when they all heard the scream. Kisame sighed tiredly, wondering again why Hidan and Kakuzu couldn't have some sweet girl stumble across them, instead of that devil. Deidara didn't even react, he kept his eyes trained carefully on the scroll he was reading. Angel tilted her head, "Call me crazy... but that acutally sounded real." There was a moment of silence before everyone laughed.
Then a very tattered and terrified Jissai ran in so fast she almost fell. She dove for Deidara and hid behind him, shaking and whimpering. Kakuzu stalked in after her, his entire back white and looking like he was about to murder someone... specifically Jissai. The girl in question poked her head over Deidara's shoulder and pointed at the enraged man, "He... He tired to tentacle rape me!" Everyone turned to stare at Kakuzu, then back at me. Hidan was the first to speak, "You actually wanted that bitch?!" He shouted at Kakuzu. Jissai shot a small irritated look at the Jashinist, but no one noticed.
Kakuzu gestured wildly to the little devil, "I never touched her! She threw a flour bomb at me." Jissai whimpered again and tried to melt into Deidara's back, who looked positively furious. Angel was greatly amused by how protected the blonde was being over Jissai. Angel knew it was a joke on Jissai's part, having helped her smooth out all the kinks in the plan before hand. Konan grinned behind her hand, she knew of the prank too, it was her idea to throw the flour bomb at Kakuzu to get his attention. And it worked perfectly. Of course Angel and Konan's hidden agenda was also successful, Deidara was doing exactly what they wanted. Both girls couldn't wait until the guys realized it was just a prank.
Deidara was arguing with Kakuzu while everyone else watched with interest. Even Jissai dropped her act after a while to watch the two... until Sasori noticed she didn't seem scared of Kakuzu anymore, "Over your fear already, Jissai?" The red head asked dully. Everyone turned to look at the newly black haired girl. She chuckled nerveously, "Okay so he didn't really... but he threatened... and that scared me..." Jissai explained, with glances at the increasingly feral Deidara. Finally his hand twitch and she went running, screaming, "SAVE ME SOMEONE!" Her former teammate ran after her. The hideout shook everytime he shot another bomb at her, which was often. Konan sighed, "Come on Angel, let's go." Angel groaned and reluctently left her boyfriend to go save one former Iwa nin from the other.
Okay, I don't know why I didn't change it back to Jissai's POV, I guess I was too lazy, besides it worked out! I hope you like it Lilay Jurtor!