It had been three weeks. Three weeks since we saved Stacie, saved Scarlett the infant, and stopped Crowley from breaking that one seal. In those three weeks, we’d stopped ten more from being broken.
We saved another baby from being born under a harvest moon on a stone table.
We saved four fishermen from killing each other with their reels.
We stopped a school shooting in Texas.
I couldn’t remember the rest, honestly. There’d been so many.
And for the ten more we left unbroken, Crowley had broken nearly twenty in its place. Almost one a day.
I was tired. I was tired of feeling like we were taking one step forward and three back. Sam and Dean trucked on, with Benny and I in tow. But I was tired.
Benny was starting to see it too. He would give me this look when he could tell I was about to quit. ‘Don’t give up,’ He’d whisper when we found ten seconds to be alone. ‘Don’t give up on me, darlin’. Ya gotta fight this.’
I told him I would. I told him I’d keep strong. But the more I tried, the more I found it easier to just fall.
We sat in another motel room, somewhere in Oregon. I could see Dean and Sam’s mouths move, but I had no idea what they were saying. I could feel Benny’s hand on my knee, but it was like a numb feeling. I knew it was there, but it made no difference.
His hand moved to my shoulder and all I could see was the cheap carpet laid out on the floor. Benny’s hand shook my shoulder a little bit and I blinked, looking up at him.
“Ya alright, darlin’?” He asked.
I nodded pointlessly. “Huh, yeah. Yeah I’m cool.” I told him, turning back to the brothers.
Sam sighed loudly and Dean looked like he could hit something.
“What’d I miss?” I asked.
“The point.” Dean said, leaning his elbows on his knees.
“Ok, so go over it again.” I told him.
“No, Scar. Because you won’t be paying attention. The same way you haven’t paid attention for a month. It’s like you don’t even want to try anymore.” He told me.
I shrugged. “I don’t. This whole thing is pointless.”
The room was so quiet; you could have heard a pin drop.
“What?” Dean asked, sounding offended.
I sighed and stood so there was some distance between the three of them and me. “Dean, this is stupid. We’re running around like chickens with our heads cut off. We’ve stop what, ten seals? Maybe twelve? How many has Crowley broke? Cas said just yesterday he found a piece of the true cross in France. How many more seals does he have to go until I’m the final straw?” I asked.
A flapping noise was heard and I threw up my arms, always worried I was going to get hit in the face with a wing.
“Six.” Castiel’s voice said.
“What?” Sam asked.
“Six more seals before Scarlett is left.” Cas said and I threw up my arms in distress.
“Do you see? Do you see this? There’s a thousand possible seals and we have to by some miracle stop six more. If Crowley worked at it, he could have that done in two or three days.” I told them.
Dean and Sam shook their heads, obviously trying to talk me down from this.
“No. You guys aren’t thinking.” I told them. I went to the dresser and picked up a gun. I stood in front of Cas and held it out to him.
“Why are you handing me this?” He asked, making no move for the weapon.
“Shoot me.” I told him.
Dean grabbed at the gun, pulling the clip out and setting it on the table before anyone else could react. “Nobody is shooting anybody!” Dean said.
“Cas would if I asked him to. If he knew this would stop Crowley, Cas would shoot me.” I said, feeling confident in my answer.
“Dean, she’s right. If she dies, the fate of the world is safe until another daughter can be born.” Castiel said.
“And what then? What happens when there’s another kid born and we have to shoot her too?” Dean said, his anger flaring.
“I don’t give a shit!” I yelled at him. “You think you’re the only one this is affecting?” I asked.
Dean looked surprised I had said anything.
“No. Screw you. You have no idea what this is doing to me. I always knew I was going to die young, but for the love of God, I’ve got nothing to leave behind. No one to leave my nothing too.” I told him.
“Darlin’,” Benny started, coming to stand in front of me. “Ya can’t give up.”
“Why not?” I asked, moving away from him when he tried to touch me. “Why can’t I just forfeit the game and start over?”
Benny’s eyes shined and I realized he was tearing up a bit. “Because I can’t lose you.” He said quietly.
I didn’t know how to respond to that. I didn’t know what to say.
Benny set his hand on my cheek, running his thumb gently over my skin. “You’re better than this, sugah.” He said. “You’re one of the strongest women I’ve ever known. Ya can’t just give up.”
“As easy as it would be to shoot you and end the process for a short while,” Cas started. “From what I’ve known of the Winchesters and Singers, they aren’t likely people to come to that conclusion.”
Benny gave me a sad smile. “Even the angel agrees.”
“Benny,” I said, feeling an empty pit in my stomach. “I can’t just keep dragging this out.”
“As long as we keep you safe, he ain’t gon’ get ya, darlin’.” Benny told me.
I shook my head. “I’m not going to be safe. Not until it’s over one way or another.” I told him.
He shook his head strongly. “I ain’t gon’ let nothin’ happen to you. I told ya once, I ain’t gon’ let nobody hurt ya. I haven’t done too well with that, darlin’, but I swear on my fangs, I ain’t gon’ let nobody hurt ya again. Even if I gotta save ya from yourself.”
“Maybe you two should take a walk.” Sam said, and I could hear his sadness.
Benny’s hand moved from my face to my hand, gripping it firmly.
I nodded to him, still feeling a little numb. “A walk.”
He turned and led me out of the motel room. We walked for a long time, not saying anything. I just liked being there with him. It was dark; the middle of the night and the moon glowed brightly above us. Benny led me to a park, surrounded by thick trees. He guided me to a section with a little clearing where he plopped down on the grass.
I followed him, laying on his chest. I looked up at the moon and felt a little peace for the first time in a long time. “Why can’t we lay here forever?” I asked him.
His hand ran over my back, comforting me. I knew he was upset by what I said in the room; maybe that was why he hadn’t replied.
“Do you miss your wife?” I asked him.
He shifted slightly. “Honestly, I haven’t thought about her in years.”
“That didn’t answer my question.” I said softly.
“Yeah, I do sometimes. I miss my baby girl and baby boy too.” He told me.
“I’m sorry you lost them.” I told him.
“It’s alright darlin’. Don’t think I’d change it again if I could.” He said, holding me tightly.
“I would.” I told him.
“Would what?” He asked.
I looked up at him. “I’d change it so you could have them back, if I could change it.”
“Why would ya do that?” He asked, sadness in his voice.
I scooted up so I was closer to him. “Because you had two beautiful children with a beautiful woman and they got taken violently away from you.”
He gave me a sad smile. “I was turned during the war. I was bleeding out on the battlefield while people ran around me. A man stopped and said he could save me, for a price.” He told me.
“So he saved your life.” I said, gazing back up at the moon.
“I like to think about it like that.” He told me. “So if ya could change anything, I’d hope you wouldn’t change it for me. I like it here.”
I nodded against his chest. “I love you Benny.”
“I love ya too.” He said, leaning down and kissing me passionately.
I leaned up, kissing him back. I ran my hands over his shirt, reveling in his touch.
He rolled me over so he was above me. He took both my hands and pinned them before my head before trailing kisses from my lips to my neck. He nipped at my neck and I gasped, not having felt the sensation in so long. He let go of my hands so his could roam my body.
I leaned my head back, moaning his name to the night air.
“Besides,” He said suddenly. “If ya wished me back human, ya would not be havin’ the fun ya are now.” He smiled against the skin of my stomach as his kisses ran lower.
“Ooh, that’s so true.” I told him, pulling him back up to kiss him again.
He smiled against my lips, pushing his hips against mine. “I want ya somethin’ fierce, darlin’.” He told me, the growl in his voice making the lower muscles in my stomach tingle.
“Oh really?” I asked, teasing him.
He pushed me down so that the only thing separating him from me was our clothes. “Really.” He said, his voice getting gruffer against my neck.
I moaned, nibbling into his neck. My tongue trailed from his lips to his Adam’s apple.
Benny’s hands gripped my hips tightly, his nails just barely biting into my flesh and his chest rumbled above me, a moan escaping his lips. “Scarlett…” He said, almost out of breath.
The sound of my name on his lips sent a shiver up my spine.
His hand snuck down to undo the button on my jeans and slid between my skin and my cotton panties. “Lord, darlin’.” He breathed against my neck. “You’re soakin’.” He said, sliding one finger into my folds.
I moaned, spreading my legs to give him easier access.
He kissed my neck, gently biting every once in a while as he slowly eased one of his fingers in and out. He was driving me crazy. I needed more of him, bucking my hips to get his finger deeper in me.
He slid another finger into the mix, giving me a little bit more pleasure from the experience, but it wasn’t enough. I needed to feel him inside me, filling me up. Benny and I hadn’t had sex in nearly two weeks and my body craved his touch.
“Benny.” I moaned. “Ooh, Benny. I want you.” I told him, my breathing getting heavier.
Apparently, he’d just been waiting for the words. He sat up on his knees, pulling his pants and boxers down just enough to expose his lower half. He pulled my jeans down and slowly slid into me.
I bit into his shoulder as he pushed against me. After a few minutes, I took him by surprise when I pushed him over onto his back. I freed one leg of my pants and sat on him, moaning as his dick slid into place.
He grasped my hips, his nails digging into my skin just enough to leave a mark that he’d been there. He lifted me off his dick before he slammed me back down. He did this five or six more times before I could feel myself tighten up.
I moaned his name as he slammed against me and I came around him. But he continued pushing through. He slammed his dick into my throbbing wet cunt as my orgasm came to a close. And he kept slamming into me. Ooh, but it felt good. It was the best sex we’d ever had. He rolled me back over, so he could sit on his knees and ram me harder.
To keep from being too loud, I bit my index finger. In a fit of lust, he ripped my finger out of my mouth. “If you bite anythin’, it better be me.” He growled at me and I’d never heard anything so sexy.
I pulled his head lower and bit hard into his neck. He slammed into me harder than he ever had before and I moaned into his skin, clamping down a little bit harder.
I tightened again, letting go of his neck to move my teeth to his shoulders. Again, I came and he fucked me through it. I was spent, all my energy lost in my two orgasms. But my second orgasm must have been his undoing, because he thrust into me once more before falling limp against me.
I sighed, contentedly as I laid back. Benny fell into the grass next to me on his stomach. “That was amazing.” I told him, trying to catch my breath.
Benny tilted his head to look over at me and he smiled. “No darlin’. You’re amazing.” He told me.
I smiled, reaching down to tug on my underwear and jeans. I just laid there as he pulled his boxers and jeans back up and secured them properly.
“Dean wanted me to make sure you were both alright. Are you both alright?” Cas said, suddenly appearing.
“Yes, Cas. We’re perfect.” I told him.
“Is Benny the pizza man?” Castiel asked.
I laughed out loud, remembering how Dean told me this story. “Hands off, angel. Benny is my pizza man.”
“I was told to return you to the motel.” Castiel said.
I groaned, feeling like my bones were made of jelly. “Please inform my oldest cousin that I am very much enjoying my post coital bliss and we’ll be back at the motel within the hour.” I said, moving to lay against Benny’s chest.
And just like that, angel wings was gone.
“He has the worst timing.” Benny said.
I giggled. “Could’ve been five minutes earlier.”
“That would have been worse timing.” Benny said, making me giggle again.
We laid there for ten more minutes before the flap of wings was heard and I groaned, burying my face in Benny’s chest.
“I’ve been informed to collect you immediately.” Castiel said.
“Did you mention the post coital?” I asked rhetorically.
“Dean says had it been pre coital, he wouldn’t be calling. Seeing as its post, he wants you to return to the motel.” Cas said.
Benny moved to stand up, taking me with him.
I blew out a breath and took Cas’s extended hand. All in a rush, we were back in the motel room.
“Are you better?” Dean snapped.
“Much, but I see you aren’t.” I told him.
“We didn’t mind you being out with Benny.” Sam started. “But we don’t know what Crowley has up his sleeve, so we need you to stay as close as possible.”
Benny sat on the bed and I sat next to him. “Do we have a plan?” I asked.
“When we get to the point of Crowley needing you, we’ll go up to the warehouse in Maine. The plan is for you to pretend you’re surrendering, then stab Crowley with the demon knife.” Sam told me.
“I thought you said that knife don’t work on him?” Benny asked the room.
“It hasn’t been proven that the demon knife doesn’t affect him. We’ve just never been close enough to test it.” Castiel told us.
“Always the bait.” I murmured.
Benny leaned over and kissed my hair, above my ear.
I sighed. “Alright. Hopefully we can delay the seals a little bit-“ I paused, the room suddenly going black. I heard the boys voices fade away as a picture started to form.
I was standing in the middle of the warehouse. The sigils for human warding were crossed out, but the angel wards stayed in place. Crowley stood in the middle of the room, smirking. “So? What’s it gonna be?” He asked.
Three of his demons stood behind him. Benny was on his knees, being held by two of them. The third one held a machete against Benny’s neck.
Sam and Dean were stuck against the wall by Crowley, who glanced at them every few seconds. I stood next to a future form of me. I squared my shoulders. “You won’t kill him.”
“Oh really?” Crowley said and Benny fangs pushed out as the blade cut into his skin.
I looked confident, cocky almost. “It’s not happening, Crowley.”
“Have it your way.” Crowley said, gesturing to the men behind him.
I screamed out Benny’s name as the machete sliced his head clean off his shoulders.
Benny’s eyes were dead in his face and they let his body slump over.
I gasped as I saw the motel come back into view and the warehouse fade away. Benny’s arm was wrapped around my waist and he looked frightened. Sam and Dean looked worried.
“What was it?” Dean asked.
I couldn’t word it. I couldn’t dare say it out loud, for fear I couldn’t change it. “The warehouse.” I said, knowing they would want an answer.
“What happened?” Benny asked quietly.
“It um… turns out well. It was surprising.” I told him, trying to catch my breath still.
“Then why do you look worried?” Sam asked.
I noticed Cas had abandoned ship. “The future always changes.” I told him.
Benny pulled me close and I nuzzled against his neck.
“Alright. If you could not, that’d be great.” Dean said.
I pulled away from Benny, feeling the fear grip my heart like a hand, making my heart hurt. “Yeah, ok. Sorry.” I told him.
Cas zapped back, making me flinch. “Crowley has broken another seal.”
“Five more and the party starts.” I said, feeling the worry in the room.
Dean glared at me.