Bo was getting restless, it was nearly 4 in the afternoon and Lauren didn't answer any of her messages and not only that but she tried calling her during lunch time and she was getting the message that Laurens number doesn't exist anymore. It was surely a mistake Bo thought. She couldn't even tell Kenzi to call her, Kenzi was mad at her from what happened yesterday and when Bo mentioned if she talked to Lauren at all, Kenzi told her to fuck off. If I don't get any reply ill go over by her work.
That must be the last one and no Lauren. Bo was waiting for over half an hour outside Laurens work and looks like everybody left, already 6 in the afternoon and no sign of Lauren while she stopped calling at her number. She was getting the same message again and again. She waited a little more and after realizing Lauren probably missed work she decided to go over by her place. She was starting to get a weird feeling on her belly, no, she didn't want to think about that, she didn't want to think that Lauren was suspecting something? Found out something? No way. We were always together, and she doesn't know the people i was with, unless Tamsin talked, but again, how and why? No, Bo was sure. Something else was happening. She arrived at Laurens place, she was going like mad on the road but she didn't care. She pressed the button of the secure front door of the building. She was still pressing the button 10 minutes after, she was pressing the button to Laurens apartment. Nobody was answering. Fucking security buildings, Bo looked around to see if there was any back entrance or something. She was very worried and upset. Her phone started ringing.
"Hey Bobo, did you find Lo? She got late at work again?"
"No I didn't. She wasn't there, I waited till the last one left and now I am outside of her place and she isn't here either, I am telling you something is up"
"I called her phone too and the number doesn't exist anymore Bo"
"Yeah I know, that's what I was trying to tell you"
"Ya think she changed her number?"
"Why? And wont give it to me?"
"I think you should come home Bo, I am sure Lauren would call us back when she can"
"I am going to go over by the red cross station first, to check there"
"Yeah do that"
Bo was back at the crack shack, she already had a few drinks, Lauren was nowhere, Bo didn't know what to think anymore. Kenzi was there with her but wasn't talking much, they exchanged looks and a few words but that was it.
"So nothing happened yesterday?"
"I told you nothing happened. I got her from the pub, we had dinner and a sex night, everything was great. She even cooked for me Kenz"
"No strange behavior?"
"No, ok stop with this"
"Bo you need to get a grip. You have been cheating on her since you guys got steady"
"Its not that, and you know Lauren is N01 for me, there is no one else. There is no way she knows, something else happened, she left early morning, maybe someone grabbed her? This area is dangerous….Kenz?"
"Can you please call Ciara?"
"Call her please? To check if she talked to Lauren today? They are close"
"I haven't talked to her since forever and what if nothing is wrong with Lauren, I don't want to worry her"
"There is something wrong with her, she didn't go to work, she never miss work and her phone number doesn't exist? She didn't call me once all day, she calls me, she texts me before I even wake up, please Kenz"
"Oh Bo, I told you to stop" Kenzi said resigned. She grabbed her phone and called Laurens friend. Ciara didn't answer. Again Kenzi looked towards Bo with the I told you so look. Then Kenzis phone ringed back and it was Ciara.
"Hi, Ciara, yeah its me Kenzi, how are you? Yeah, we didn't talk much, yeah, I am glad you are doing fine, truth is I did call you to see how are you doing but mostly I want to ask you if you heard from Lauren today? Oh you couldn't talk with her, she is in the hospital, oh her parents wont let anyone see her, yeah that's why I called you, No Bo knows nothingggggggg" Bo was trying to get the phone from Kenzi.
"Yeah its so upsetting, who would have thought that about Lauren, no I didn't know, Bo? Yeah I am keeping her away from the hospital, you know how things we are going to keep in touch"
"WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF KENZI? WHAT HAPPENED?"
Kenzi was looking at Bo with hate for the first time in their common life.
"Lauren is in the hospital, her brother found her in her bathtub in a sea of blood, her family wont say what happened but Ciara thinks she tried to kill herself" Bo grabbed Kenzi, and moved her like crazy.
"You still think she knows nothing Bo?" Bo was moving like crazy and Kenzi tried to keep Bo still.
"Leave me alone"
"You cant see her, her family wont let anyone see her, Ciara got the news from Nadia"
Bo grabbed her helmet, jacket and keys and left.
Lauren had her eyes closed but wasn't sleeping. She could feel Bos breath next to her and that thing inside her. She moved her hand and took the strap on out of her body. I am still a lesbian Lauren thought, she wasn't a fan of this, she loved the feel of Bos body on her and certainly not the feeling of something external. Bo had her hand around her, Lauren moved carefully and got out of bed. She turned and looked at Bo, she was sleeping so peacefully. No regret or any sign of guilt. She got her clothes and left the bedroom. There was no time to get her personal stuff or clothes she had left here for the times she was spending her nights, Bo can keep em, Kenzi can use them, they are all branded. She got dressed downstairs, looked at the place and left. Lauren chose to walk, it was still dark outside but she didn't care really. She was looking around her, smiling bitterly, the area was a dangerous one. When someone you love so much hurts you for no obvious reason, why someone whom you never known and needs money wont do it? People who were raised without proper family life, education and missed out almost on everything, why they wont be angry or mad at society? These thoughts and others filled her mind when she finally arrived at her place that morning. She certainly needed a hot bath. She opened the door to her apartment. She was rich. Born in one of the best families, with the best education and the best care. Yet all she met in that sort of inviroment, her inviroment, were people who had so much and wanted more. When someone was happy to give, was happy to make other people happy with the material things, that person was branded weird, odd, someone who didn't fit. She thought of her parents, her brother, her rich friends. All of them good people in general but really what did they offer? What did they change around them? They give money to charity but never really get involved. They stay safe and at a distance. And when one of them want to do things differently they reject that person, they sideline that person. And then you delude yourself that moving away or out of that inviroment you can find people who share the same dreams as you. That you don't care where they come from and they don't care where you come from. She opened the hot water to fill the tub. Started undressing. She thought of Bo and Kenzi. In her weird nerdy way she thought she was fitting with them. She and Bo, it was something unbelievable, the way she felt around her, as a scientist she was always so fascinated by love. She tried to explain it in the scientific way and it was easy for her to do that, but in reality there was no explanation. Like the way she would try to explain illnesses and find cures and when she had no answers of how people who were expected to die soon, would live years and years or they got cured when they supposedly had no chance of surviving. She thought of God at those times. She thought of the beauty of the sky and the sea, she loved water so much, and the beauty of nature but most importantly the beauty of science, the beauty of species and particularly the beauty of the human kind. Every cell for a cause, every organ for a use, everything placed and made so perfectly. Her mind got back to her human. Bo. Silly kid she thought. She reminded herself that she already had given Bo so many chances, which she doesn't regret, she said to herself it was my choice. She started to feel the pain from the betrayal. All this time, since yesterday she kept herself at a distance from Bos actions. She shut her mind and heart from what Bo did. But now everything was back. Bo was fucking others and then would come to her, and Lauren couldn't tell anything, couldn't feel anything, she couldn't feel her Bo was with someone else earlier. She was so blinded. She was so happy. She didn't mind that, she didn't mind that she was blindly in love. She didn't care, she loved the feeling, as with her science, she wanted to give everything to her love. But what hurt most was that for just another time she was an outsider. Bo treated her as different, weird, odd, Bo thought she was such a fool that she could so easily cheat on her and trick her, and Kenzi? She really thought she had actually made friends with her, like real friends, not friends only because of Bo. But Kenzi had one best friend. Lauren smiled bitterly again. Kenzi didn't even tried to protect her. Lauren thought the stds and Aids, she didn't even know if her lover was having free sex with the others as she did with her. I am such a joke. Such a joke. A real doormant for an outsider watching over all this mess. Kenzi was protecting her best friend, that was where her loyalty was. Lauren noticed the hair in her legs, as a blonde she didn't need to shave much or often. But at that moment her mind stuck. She grabbed a razor and started shaving her legs. Her brother would be here soon, they were having breakfast together, he loves my cooking. He wants to know about my girlfriend Lauren thought. Lauren smiled bitterly again and again, she was so proud of Bo yesterday when she was talking about her to her parents, how beautiful and strong she is, a war hero, a great athlete, and how she made it throu hardship in her life. How quickly things can change Lauren thought. She could imagine her brothers look, if I tell him what happened, Oh Lauren again you've been a fool, oh Lauren again people used you, Lauren closed her eyes, she didn't care for what he would say, what her parents would say, what Nadia would say, she didn't care, what she cared was Bo, how Bo wont be what Lauren thought she would be, what Bo really was, Lauren felt so disappointed in her, Bo actually confirmed everybody with what she did, confirmed what everybody around them expected, and that was making Lauren so hurt, because Lauren believed in her, believed they could make it. She didn't pay much attention and she cut her leg a bit, the blood started running in the water. It was such a beautiful sight. Most people would think she was crazy but Lauren was so fascinated by science, it was something that never betrayed her. She could always count on her science. She dived her head under the water and watched the small amount of blood running from her leg, she got the razor near her wrists, she wondered how she would feel if she experienced a huge loss of blood? She knew what goings to happen to her body but she didn't know how it felt. She slowly started cutting her vein under water watching the blood running inside water. Normally, 7-8% of human body weight is from blood. In adults, this amounts to 4.5-6 quarts of blood. This essential fluid carries out the critical functions of transporting oxygen and nutrients to our cells and getting rid of carbon dioxide, ammonia, and other waste products. In addition, it plays a vital role in our immune system and in maintaining a relatively constant body temperature. Blood is a highly specialized tissue composed of more than 4,000 different kinds of components. Four of the most important ones are red cells, white cells, platelets, and plasma. All humans produce these blood components-there are no populational or regional differences, she smiled at herself, she knows every detail. Now the blood was starting to run more, she slashed the connecting vein up in her arm, now the blood was running more and more, The effects of blood loss depend on a person's general state of health, the amount of blood lost, and how quickly it was lost. Bleeding may be internal or external. With external bleeding, blood leaves the body through a break in the skin (from a wound, trauma, or surgery), or a body opening such as the mouth, anus, or vagina. With internal bleeding, blood is lost from the blood vessels, but stays inside the body, often leading to swelling and pain. Both internal and external bleeding can lead to serious complications. Internal bleeding may be harder to recognize and diagnose because the bleeding is not visible.
The more blood is lost, and the faster it is lost, the more severe the symptoms and complications. Lauren could feel she was losing herself now, she was dizzy and going deeper in the water, she closed her eyes, feeling the water mingled with the blood around her. She moved her hand on her belly and immediately thought of Bos words about getting her pregnant. She smiled and Bos face came in her mind. You broke me baby, you broke me.
Bo walked in the reception of the hospital that looked like a huge 5 star hotel, that's surely not a public service hospital she thought.
The nurse or whatever she was raised her head and looked at her. Bos appearance was one of a black dressed biker, and she was looking very anxious and tired.
"We don't give free drugs here, you can try at the pharmacies that are on these lists"
She offered a piece of paper to Bo.
Bo started hitting her hand on the board. The nurse again raised her eyes and looked annoyed.
"Lauren Lewis? I want to know the room of Lauren Lewis, she was brought here this morning"
"Visiting hours are over, you can visit your friend in the morning from 10-12 and afternoon from 5-6."
"Look, I am not her friend, I am her girlfriend and I need to see her right now"
The nurse noticed Bo was getting angry and restless.
"Sorry but only family is allowed outside visiting hours and that's only if the doctors allow it, now please leave before I call security"
"Ok I ll leave, can you please tell me what room at least? So I can visit tomorrow?"
The nurse informed her that Lauren was at the psychiatric clinic at the second floor room 214. Bo walked out, she headed towards her bike and stayed there for a little time. They kept Lauren at the psychiatric clinic? Lauren was fine she told herself. There is no way she tried to hurt herself. Something else is going on. There is no way she knows about me, no way. She looked around at the hospital, it was like a business building, there must be back entrances Bo thought. She walked behind from the parking lot and got at the back. It was a clean and very safe building Bo thought, she waited around for a few minutes, until a service door opened and some cleaning ladies came out. Bo rushed and managed to get in. Second floor she said to herself. She got to the service elevator and pressed second floor, things looked pretty silent around here, again nothing like the hospitals she knew. She was sweaty and sooooo nervous She was keeping herself from reacting or thinking about losing Lauren. She slowly walked on the hall, she was lucky that it was around 9 and there wasn't much movement and most of patient rooms were closed. A couple of relatives sitting or talking slowly outside rooms, she was behaving naturally looking for Laurens room.
She noticed that rooms 210 and after were pretty isolated from the rest of the clinic, isolated and private, and she passed room 213 she noticed 3 people standing outside room 214 and two sitting on the couch. One of them sitting was Nadia, the other must be Laurens mum. Same build and hair Bo thought. The people standing were Ciara, and two men.I bet that's her father and brother. As she approached they all turned to see the intruder who was breaking their silence. Nadia got up quickly and started walking towards her.
"Wtf your doing here?" She got infront of Bo. Bo didn't answer, she was trying to restrain herself. Ciara came over shhhing Nadia.
"Not here Nadia"
"You dare coming here" Bo tried to walk passed Nadia but the curly haired woman grabbed her hand
Bo turned her hand behind Nadias back and got her on the wall.
"Don't fucking touch me" Ciara tried to calm Bo while Laurens brother rushed to help Nadia.
"You must be Bo" he said. He couldn't look more disgusted. He looked towards Bo in a demeaning way. Bo let Nadia go.
"Yes, I am. Sorry that we meet in such circumstances, I guess you are Los brother,"
"Laurens" Bo offered her hand but he refused to shake hers.
"I am just here to see Lauren, don't want to cause any trouble"
"Oh please, I bet your are the reason she did this to herself, you coming here pretending not knowing anything"
Bo noticed Laurens parents were observing her as if she was from out of space.
"You cant see her. Only relatives are allowed and the doctors even advised us not to tire her"
"I don't know what Lauren told you, but she and I, ehhh, we are girlfriends, I mean I am her girlfriend. I need to see her"
Bo watched as Laurens father approached. He looked like one of those politicians, with his grey hair and suit.
"My daughter is a sensitive one. That feature oftens leads her to make mistakes with people. I think one of those mistakes also led her here. You cant see her and if you are responsible for what happened to her in any way, I would make sure you would never be near her, ever again. If you don't leave now, I am calling security"
Bo ignored Laurens father and bypassed him, she was quick and strong, she was pretty fit too, she grabbed the door and burst into Laurens room with a sudden move, she managed to see Lauren laying in a bed with her eyes closed, looking pale and with her arms covered, before Laurens brother got to her.
"You trash, get away from my sister"
"Lauren" Bo started yelling."Lauren, I know you can hear me, I am here baby"
security arrived and they got Bo outside the room.
"Ok, ok leave me alone, I am leaving" Bo was moving like crazy.
She looked around her at these people.
"Nothing can keep me away from Lauren, you should know that, nothing" She straighted her jacket and left.
"I told you she was trash" Nadias voice was heard.
"Bo" Ciara was calling behind her. She got in the elevator with her.
Bo was silent and was looking straight.
"She is ok, she lost a lot of blood but she would make it, she is just weak and needs rest" Bo said nothing but a huge weight left her shoulders.
"What happened Bo? Did you had a fight or something?"
Bo didn't answer. The elevator door opened and she left.
Kenzi was waiting for Bo to arrive home. Ciara called her and told her what happensed, she felt sorry about the way Laurens family treated Bo. She also told her a few more details about Los situation. She then asked again if she knew what happened and why Lo would try to kill herself, Kenzi said she knows nothing and that Lauren and Bo spend the night together and everything was fine. She felt sick from the lies. The door opened. Her friend walked in. Kenzi moved forward and hugged her best friend. Bo sat on the couch with her hands on her head.
"Did you see her?"
"Just for a sec, they…"
"Yeah I know, Ciara called me"
Kenzi hugged Bo again.
"She is going to be ok, don't worry"
"You think she would take me back? You think she knows? That's why she did that? You should see her, so pale and her arms…."
"Lauren is a top doctor Bo, you think if she wanted to kill herself, she wouldn't have succeeded?"
"Her family….they are like royals or something, Lauren isn't like them, she is so different, so different"
"I am going back Kenz, please I need leave from the army, 5-6 days, I go to be there"
"I know but they wont let you see her Bo"
"I don't care, I am going to stay outside, I don't care. I have to be there. You think she would take me back Kenz?"
"I don't know Bo,bo"
"I fucked up"
"I cant lose her Kenzi."
Kenzi didn't know what to say to her friend anymore. If Lauren did hurt herself because of what Bo was doing behind her back, she couldn't see how she would be back with her. And now with her family getting involved. I think I wont see Lauren again either. What she must feel. We sure betrayed her Bo. She hugged her best friend strong.