Bo was anxious, she couldn't focus, it was good that everything was pretty quiet and she didn't need to be 100% present, and she had about 3 hours more before her shift ends. Instead she couldn't wait to finish and get back to Lauren as soon as possible. Lauren, she smiled thinking about her, she and Lauren had become inseparable, she would run to find her and even wait for her sometimes to finish from her checks, they would eat together at the eatery and then spend almost all their time together until they had to get back at their places at night. Sometimes Kenzi would join them but she would leave when the endless make out sessions would start, as Kenzi called them. Bo was finding it very hard to let Lauren go every night. They would share sloppy and thirsty kisses until they couldn't take it anymore. Unfortuntaly they didn't manage to share more intimate moments like their first night, Bo didn't want to make love, errrr make sex with Lauren in her barracks room because it was so accessible and she didn't want them to be caught or other soldiers to start talking about Lauren. She was aware of how rumors could so easily spread. She didn't want Lauren to get a reputation, even though almost everybody was aware she and Lauren were together in some capacity, she didn't want soldiers to talk about her in a bad way. Bo didn't want to think the reasons behind all these thoughts. This was their last 3 days together, Bos regiment was ending their tour while Lauren was staying for about a month more with the Red Cross. She didn't want to think about that, she was going to leave Lauren behind and she didn't want to think about being away from her or Lauren being here alone. She wanted these 3 hours to pass and be with her again, to spend all the free time they had left together.
"Hey, what are you thinking about?" Lauren asked Bo. They were hugging and sharing kisses and cuddles on their secret corner. Lauren could tell Bos mind was elsewhere, she would either kiss her in a strong desperate way, and then look away and just hug her.
"Nothing". Lauren didn't want to pressure her so she didn't insist, Bo was acting this way for a couple of days now and Lauren was suspecting it was because their time together was coming to an end. But she didn't know what to do, how to react. Bo said nothing about meeting in Toronto or keep in contact. They never mentioned anything about any kind of future.
"I am fucking sick of this"
"Of what baby?"
"Of this, I want us to be able to have sex without fear of getting caught or someone interrupting us, I want space so I can have you all by myself"
"Awwww. You know I have a pretty big bed back home, I am sure you can do anything you want of me there, its pretty spacey".
"So you have a pretty big bed huh?"
"What about a house? You have a big house too?"
"Its an apartment, its not that big, only got two bedrooms and the usual, why you ask?"
"Just asking. You should see where Kenzi and I are living"
"Tell me about it, I want to know"
"Its one of those places that doesn't have walls, semi-ruin when me and Kenzi started to hang out, I bet you never been at one of those places, after we got in the army we decided to live together and we managed to make it better and look presentable. It's a really nice place, after you get used to it"
"As long as it's a home for you and Kenzi, I am sure its beautiful."
"Yeah, you should see it. I bet you were raised having everything you wanted"
"Why you say that? You think I am spoiled?"
"No, I mean because of your family and all"
"Well, if you talk about money ok, but my parents were very strict and lets say I was raised to know my place. What about you?" Lauren was dying to know more about Bo but she never talked about herself. Apart from the information she managed to get from Kenzi and Ciara.
"I was raised on my own, have you ever tried drugs Lauren?"
Lauren smiled. " A couple times weed but I am not sure its considered a drug"
"I have used everything except heroin" Bo was getting a bit aggressive and Lauren could feel it.
"How about sex?"
"Umm, I didn't understand"
"Sex, have you ever tried a threesome or any sex toys? Have you ever had sex under the influence of drugs? Its fantastic you know, especially with cocaine you can continue for hours, I have done almost everything"
Lauren didn't like where the conversation was going so she didn't answer. Bo didn't say anything, she tensed up and went on a closed mode after that. They didn't talk up until it was time to go back.
"I am leaving in two days"
"Please take care of yourself, I wont be here to protect you"
"Don't worry I will"
Lauren felt this was their goodbye, she could notive Bo struggling to tell her.
"I am going to be busy the next two days, getting my stuff and reports ready and I am not sure I would manage to see you again."
"We are leaving at 6 in the morning, if you want to come and say goodbye."
"I better not" Lauren said with a weak smile.
"I guess this is it"
"I guess so"
Bo got up and she dragged Lauren up too. She was looking so stressed.
"Bo its fine, don't worry."
Bo hugged Lauren again, they kissed.
"Promise me you would take care of yourself too and Kenzi. And you got my number if you guys need anything"
"Yeah I have your number"
Bo finally walked away from Lauren. Lauren started walking away too, making sure she was reaching her place when she started to cry. She got inside her tent, Ciara was asleep, she didn't change, instead she got under her blanket and cried as silently as she could.
"She isn't coming Bo. She said she wont come." Kenzi said to her best friend as Bo was looking around, they were both ready holding their stuff while they were waiting on the line to pass the check and aboard the military plane back to Canada. Kenzi saw Lauren the previous night and the blond was playing it brave. They said their goodbyes and Kenzi told her that they are so going to hang out in Toronto, especially since Lauren was a trust fund chick. Lauren smiled and told her she was invited to crash at her apartment, while Kenzi promised Lauren she was taking her to the best bars in Toronto for crazy partying after she gets back from Afganistan. Neither of them mentioned Bo. Bo informed her earlier that Lauren told her she wasn't coming to say goodbye. She was watching her friend now, looking for her. She was feeling sorry for her but at the same time she wanted Lauren to stay away. To not show up. She wanted her friend to go after her, it was so clear to Kenzi that Bo was in love with Lauren but Bo wasn't ready or didn't want to hear that. Kenzi tried to talk to her about that but Bo instead of talking spend her last night fucking Tamsin. after she got drunk and Kenzi was mad at her this morning.
"I said stop looking around, Lauren isn't coming"
"Who the fuck cares? I wasn't looking for her"
"Where is Tamsin?" Kenzi asked, fully knowing that was going to bother Bo more since Bo already had regretted sleeping with her.
"Why the fuck should I know? And can you shut up, I have a headache"
Kenzi delivered her stuff for checking and signed her tour end paper, she stated her name and military ID and got inside the plane. Bo was following behind.
"I think I saw Ciara" Kenzi said.
Bo turned and noticed Laurens friend greeting them with their hands, they greeted her back. Kenzi could see the disappointment at her friends face. Almost everyone was aboard the plane and the engines started.
"I cant wait to be back at the crack shack. We are holding a huge party the minute we arrive Bobo"
Bo wasn't listening to what her best friend was saying, her mind was elsewhere. So she didn't come after all. And she said she loves me. Fucking bitch. I don't care, who cares? I have one whole month of vacations and its going to be so good.
"Yeah Kenz, cant wait. We are going to party like crazy" She turned and smiled at her best friend. She suddenly hugged Kenzi.
"Hey Bobo whats up?"
"Nothing Kenz. You are my sister you know that? The only family I have"
"Of course I know that bitch, you cant get away from me ever" They laughed while the plane was taking off.
"They left" Lauren turned when she heard Ciara behind her. She said nothing and continue to eat her modest breakfast.
"You don't have to hide from me Lauren"
" I am not hiding anything Ciara. I have been crying for two nights in a row, I am sure you can hear me even though you are too polite to say anything. I was aware of the outcome and I don't regret anything. And I don't blame Bo for anything. Its not her fault that I fell for her. I am going to survive, time heals everything" Yes, I am going to get over her, this wasn't real, it wasn't real life. I am going back to my life and to the hospital and I am going to try my best and forget Bo.