I closed the baby's ears gently with my palms as angry yells started permeating through the walls of my bedroom.
It was my parents. Or more correctly, my mother and stepfather. My biological father had left the house before I was even born. I guess I could make people hate me, since before my birth.
The baby squirmed as he made bubbles from his drooling saliva. He was my half brother; Jee, only born a year ago. And already the house was upside down. Apparently the men that came into my mom's life had a phobia of babies.
I sighed as Jee fell asleep despite my uncomfortable hold on his pinnas. He liked being touched by me. It was mostly me taking care of him anyways.
Now I was free to cry without having anyone look at me. I shifted his small, warm body to the cream coloured crib, next to my single bed, and put a fluffy blanket on his slumbering form. His body quickly snuggled in the familiar fabric and I smiled just as a tear fell.
Music blared through my ears as I changed my baby brother's diaper; to distract myself from the smell. It was six in the morning and I had school in another one and half hour.
It was five when I had woken up and tiptoed downstairs to the master bedroom. Nobody had been inside. Frowning, I had turned towards the kitchen.
My heart had stopped for a second. The floor was a mess; glass shards everywhere, various liquids pooling on the floor and counter and my mom's defeated figure slumped on a chair while her head rested on the dining table. Dad was nowhere to be found.
I had spent an hour trying to clear the mess in the kitchen; cut my hand thrice and slipped on the floor twice, while trying not to wake up her sleeping figure.
Presently, my right hand was in a bandage after I'd somehow managed to pull out the glass pieces. Jee giggled as I pulled his pants up. He was very ticklish around his thighs. So was I actually.
I mentally cursed as I looked at the clock again; 6:30. I needed to wash and get dressed quickly. The school was very far from home and I had to walk a considerable distance to reach the spot where the school bus would pick me up from. The driver wasn't willing to compromise everyone's schedule just to make sure I got to school. And that was alright, I understood where he was coming from.
And I also understood that mom wasn't really rich so we had to settle for whichever house was the cheapest. Since a year my parents had been going back and forth for a divorce. I can only imagine how her pregnancy had gone. We moved out from dad's when house when she was in her third trimester. And that man hadn't helped us a bit.
I remembered that day vividly because that was the first time I was wailing in public. As we were waiting for the cab to take us to our new home, mom had suddenly let out an excruciating scream and doubled over; her hand clutching her swollen belly.
It was surreal and horrifying for me. Never had I ever imagined for my mother to go into labour on the middle of a street and more importantly prematurely.
The wait outside the emergency room were the most terrifying hours of my life. My brain kept taunting me that I was going to lose my mom. Dad hadn't showed up. In fact he didn't show up until Jee turned six months old. I'll never forgive him for that.
My mom on the other hand was making the same mistakes that she had made in her first marriage. To her she was the one who was flawed; who kept upsetting dad. And so she didn't object to dad coming here whenever he felt like.
We had many arguments about this. In fact I could see another one blossoming for the day after what happened last night. But that would have to wait until after I returned from school.
I pressed down my plaid skirt to remove any wrinkles; I had not been able to iron it today either. I flung my backpack onto my back and carefully picked up Jee and his duffel bag filled with his toys, foodstuffs, cloths and blankets. Every day before school I dropped him at an old lady's house who worked as a babysitter.
Mom worked as a shift nurse all day while I was at school; sometimes even staying for the night. So a trustworthy babysitter was very much needed.
Unfortunately Mrs. Cho's house was in the opposite direction of my bus stop. So I had to hurry to make it on time. She took care of multiple babies at a time and hence she babysitted at her own house.
It was 7:00 by the time I left her house and I was panicking. If the bus left me I would need to jog for forty five minutes to reach school. And despite that I'd be late by fifteen minutes.
I was out of breath, slightly dizzy and profusely sweating and I was only half way there. My stomach felt uneasy. I hadn't had the time to have breakfast. Come to think of it, I didn't even remember having dinner last night.
Looking up was only making me nauseous and light headed. Was I even going to make it?
I was blacking out...
"Hey, are you alright!?" A smooth voice hollered from my side and I saw a boy get out of a shop. I wanted to nod but I couldn't get my neck moving.
The last thing my darkening pupils caught were a set of livid blue eyes and a dark black mop of hair as soft arms caught my fall.