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Chapter 3 - This is Not Goodbye

Chapter 3 – This is Not Goodbye

The sounds coming out of Jane's mouth were wretched. Blood appeared at the corners of her mouth, her body spasmed intermittently. Maura moved from her position where she was applying pressure, allowing Korsak to take over, to cradle Jane's head in her lap, silent tears running down her face.

"Hush, pretty girl," she said, gently massaging the slight wrinkles in her forehead caused by the pain away. "you need to save your energy for later so that you can fight with the poor doctor over here to let you out before you shoot him." Jane looked up into those hazel eyes she loved so much.

"Y-yo-you've b-been around m-me t-t-t-oo long"

"Not long enough," came the gentle response. Maura placed a soft kiss on her fiance's forehead. "We still have many more years left, don't you give up on me now," the tremor in her voice betrayed the confident aura she gave off but Jane heard it and it was enough to give her pause. God, if she had to die, it would be on her own terms, not Doyle's. She had a feeling it was best to say what she had to now, before it was too late, before she no longer had the opportunity. She owed it to Maura.

"M-Maura..I-I-I'm s-sorry..Doyle.."

"No, Jane, no. You have nothing to apologise for," Maura replied fiercely. "You were doing you're job. I'm the one who should be sorry. I should never have let you come in here unarmed. I should never have pushed you to one side and ignored you at the warehouse. You were doing you're job, you hear me? You were doing you're job. So, no. No apologies."

"Y-yo-u d-do-don't blame me?"

Maura gently stroked one hand through Jane's hair, the other cupped her cheek. A tear escaped and rolled down her face at the thought that. Oh god. "I never blamed you, Jane. Never. And if you had to do it all over again, I wouldn't want you to do any different, understand?"

Jane studied her fiancé momentarily, holding the knowledge that the ME couldn't lie, before releasing the breath she hadn't been aware she'd been holding. "N-noth-nothing d-different," she nodded.

"Now you listen to me, Jane Rizzoli," the ME said, her voice brooking no terms for argument, "I expect to see you once you're done in surgery and then you're coming home with me and we're going to take a few days off and snuggle up on the couch with some popcorn and pizza and watch copious amounts of tv and movies. I'll even let you watch that horrible one, Alien, you love so much. How does that sound?" To Jane's ears, it was the best thing she'd heard since the awful affair; it meant that they were going to be ok. Cop-a-what? The detective thought, brain having caught up with the ME's words, eyebrows knitting together in perplexity. "Endless, Jane. It means endless," the ME clarified knowing exactly what had caused her confusion. Oh. She smiled but it came out more like a grimace. Even in such circumstances, Maura's google brain was still in overdrive.

Bringing herself back to matters of more importance, she managed to ask, "P-pep—pepper-roni?"

Maura chuckled at Jane's hopeful look. "A huge pepperoni. I'll even join you this once."Jane's eyes widened at the thought of the blonde 'feasting' on all those calories.

"M-Maura?"

"Yes, sweet girl?"

"I d-don't snuggle."Maura chuckled. Even when bleeding out, Jane always had that badass reputation to maintain. It was typical of her Detective but she wouldn't have it any other way. The chuckle turned into a choked sob. She looked down to see Jane's brows furrowed, a concerned look in her eyes. Maura got a hold of herself. Now was certainly not the time. She needed to be there for Jane, to be strong.

"With me, you do. And I'm so glad only I get to see that side of you," she whispered, as doctors and nurses alike gathered to stop the blood flow. She leant down to brush their noses together, before placing a soft kiss on those lips she loved so much. "I love you," she said, "so, so, so, so much."

Jane's eyelids fluttered closed, the act of staying awake more than a mere struggle. "Jane?" The panic in her voice could now be heard. The brunette's silence only elevated the worry.

"Doctor Isles, we need to take her now." Maura was brought out of the bubble they'd enclosed themselves in but then it had always been like that with the two of them. Symbiotic; that was them. It was hard to know where one started and the other began. Maura nodded, conflicted. Whilst she understood the doctor's need to take Jane into surgery immediately, she couldn't help wanting to keep her close by, if only to make sure she stayed with her.

"Stay with me pretty girl. Stay with me," she whispered, bending close to Jane's ear before letting go of Jane's soft, scarred hand so that the doctor and nurses could do their job. She was still whispering it long after Jane had gone.


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