Chapter 3: I'm Just a Kid and Life is a Nightmare
So I really liked the fact that I was able to be a kid again, but there were some aspects I could do without.
Case and point, the upcoming Halloween Dance. I had always hated large crowded room filled with hormonal teenagers in the 40's, but based off of Tony's descriptions it's turned into a, and I quote, 'a thinly veiled orgy in progress.'
What that means, I don't want to know. Anyways I was sitting with Peter, Gwen, and Katie at our usual table in the back of the cafeteria. However Katie easily spotted the neon orange posters with bold black letters proclaiming the Halloween Dance.
"So do you guys want to go to the Halloween Dance?" Katie asks lazily. "We can do a group costume."
"Why don't we do super heroes?" I almost cry out in frustration, it's always Katie coming up with things that could jeopardize my identity.
"What type of super heroes?"
"Hm," she thinks about what type of super heroes, please don't be avengers, please. "What about DC super heroes? I call Wonder Woman, 'cause I don't want to do anything to my hair."
"What will I be?"
"You and Peter can be Batman and Cat Woman."
"What will I be?" Steve asks.
"Superman, you're muscled enough for it."
"Um, I am not wearing a short, tight, leather suit."
"Fine then we can dress like the Avengers." I almost scream.
"Fine, I'll be Black Widow then." Gwen says satisfied with herself.
"Um, I'll be Hawkeye then." Peter says awkwardly.
"I'll be a female Ironman." Katie says pleased with herself. "And Steve can be Captain America. There we're all set."
I really want to hit something. Of course we end up dressing like the Avengers. However I chuckle at the idea of Katie as a female Ironman.
"What is so funny Steve?"
"I feel like he would appreciate that sentiment very much Katie."
"Wait, you know Tony Stark?"
"Yeah my adoptive mom is Pepper Potts." All of them look at me with their eyes wide and Katie's jaw drops before she asks rapid fire.
"What? You're the adopted so of Pepper Potts? As in the CEO of Stark whatever it is?" I nod smiling at their shocked faces. "Do you live in Stark Towers?"
"Yeah," I answer.
"No way." Peter says.
"And I'm pretty sure they would like to meet you guys. I mean Tony is and Pepper will probably go mother bear on us."
"Yes, I bet Peter will bow down before Bruce Banner and ask for any wisdom."
"You live with my only two living scientific heroes." Peter says he doesn't seem like he is all there.
"Oh, well you guys can come over tomorrow if you want."
"Really?" Katie asks. Peter looks ready to have an aneurism and Gwen seem interested.
"Yeah, I'll tell them."
I acted cool when I told them they could come over, but internally I was panicking. I live with Earth's Mightiest Heroes yes, but they aren't the kind of people that can keep every secret. I'm worried that Tony of Clint might slip up in their insults. I really don't want to explain why Tony calls me Old Man, and Capsicle.
Let's just hope Thor doesn't end up on Earth in the next 36 hours because I'm going to die. He doesn't know that I don't want my friends to know.
I shiver just thinking about it.
So I walk in and go to the elevator only to be asked by JARVIS (Just, A, Rather, Very, Intelligent, System as Tony told me it was called).
"Master Rodgers, you seem nervous and you're heart rate is higher than normal. Is anything wrong?"
"You'll find out in a minute JARVIS." I say cursing the AI internally.
I get up there only to find Tony eating something.
"Hey kid, so how was school?" I glare at him. Ever since he found out I was a teenager he's been calling me kid. While he trusts my judgment, and trusts me in general, to him I'm still a kid.
"Good, but I invited my friends over." I'm trying not to yell.
"That's great! Now why are you so freaked out?" I glare at him.
"Why wouldn't I be? I have normal human friends. I'm a super soldier and I live with other super heroes who may or may not slip up with my identity."
"Don't worry, we'll keep Katniss and myself away from your friends."
"Please tell me Thor isn't coming."
"Not for like another week remember?"
Thank you Jesus, I don't have to deal with a demigod bursting in and ruining my cover.
"Anyways so you have homework right? What else is on Captain Prude's to-do list?"
"Um, well Katie managed to get us all to agree to dress as the Avengers soo." Tony chuckles.
"I think I like this girl already. So you're yourself for Halloween?"
"Yeah, Peter is Clint, Gwen is Natasha, and Katie is…"
"A girl version of you." I wince and I practically see his ego inflate and joy lightens up his eyes.
"I am making her costume and she has no say what so ever."
"How will you get her measurements? You know without accosting her."
"JARVIS can scan her and take her measurements." I shake my head. "And don't worry I'll send the computer generated model to you." I blush knowing he means that it will be naked.
"That is a violation of privacy and her rights."
"I'm fucking with you kid. That would be messed up for even my jokes."
I shake my head and worry about tomorrow, because Tony didn't do the best job of reassuring me.
I was nervous, and not the 'butterflies in your stomach' kind of nervous. I felt like I should be ready to bolt at any second, so that I could preserve my secret identity. However, I calmed myself down telling myself everyone knew what to do. There was no Thor for at least 3 days, Bruce was in his lab so no hulk outs (though he was surprised to hear about Peter), Clint was to stay in the air vents, Tony was working in his lab, and Natasha was somewhere off being… Natasha.
However, Happy was there to greet us and decided to give all of my friends their new passes for the building, and the whole security lecture. At least they thought he was relatively normal. Then we got into the elevator and whole magical, amazing Avenger things kicked in, starting with JARVIS.
"Hello Master Rodgers, am I correct in assuming that the three with you are Miss Málmur, Miss Stacey, and Mr. Parker?" The AI asked politely.
"Yes, the blonde is Miss Stacey, and the girl with black hair is Miss Málmur, and the boy is obviously Mr. Parker. Guys say hello to Tony Starks AI JARVIS. JARVIS say hello to my friends."
"Hello ladies and gentleman. It is very nice to meet you." Katie just waves amazedly.
"Wow, a real AI…" I can't understand past that. It turns more into Tony's type of English. Gwen can seemingly follow it but Katie and I are lost almost immediately.
Then we make it up to the communal living room thing (I still don't know what it is called). We are greeted by the sight of Bruce and Tony eating Shawarma again. I almost scream as they had said they weren't going to be here. I can only assume that they got to hungry and already had eaten through the food that they had in their labs.
"Good Afternoon, Stevie, I see you finally brought your friends over." He spins slowly and ends up facing us. "But be ready for extreme humiliation!" I slap my forehead.
"Really Tony? Stevie?" Pepper walks in wearing more casual clothes, meaning a t-shirt and some colored skinny jeans, but still seems intimidating.
"Hello, my name is Pepper Potts, I'm Steven's adoptive mother. He's told me so much about you." Katie shakes her outstretched hand.
"Really? But Steve's kind of quiet." She tells them and Tony hops off and stands next to Pepper.
"He is, it's just that he draws you a lot. There's like 7 or 8 pictures of you in his sketchbook for class." I blush bright red. How did he know that?
"Tony! No going through his stuff!" Pepper admonishes.
"I didn't purposefully go snooping around for it. He fell asleep at the counter and I saw it opened. So I looked through it."
I look over to see that Katie is trying to hide her blush with her hands and she isn't looking towards me. I try to bury myself in my clothes. I hear Gwen and Peter chuckling slightly.
"Um, anyways this is the movie slash living room." Pepper says to break up the tension.
"Wow, I could probably fit my house in here," Peter says finally looking around the room instead of my humiliation.
"Probably the whole bottom floor of the home I live at."
"Anyways, you guys can hang out here, or you can go down to Steve's floor. If that's okay."
"You have your own floor?" Katie asks eyes wide.
"I'm still getting used to it."
"Can we go there?" Peter asks.
"Oh before you do, JARVIS!"
"Tony, don't do it." Pepper warns.
"Please start the alarms if they have an orgy or anything that hormonal teenagers would do."
"Of course, sir." The AI says politely, causing our collective mortification to skyrocket.
"I am so sorry about Tony. He's my idiot."
They start bickering and I lead them away before anything like that can happen again. We ride down in a tense silence all of us blushing and feeling awkward.
"I'm sorry, Tony is just well… Tony."
"Yeah, but still, to keep us from having an orgy?"
"Still not as bad as Thor. He literally like tries to kill you if you eat a poptart. We have an entire pantry that's stocked for him. He also constantly asks about any possible… conquests."
"Woah, that's… awkward."
"Yeah, I'm just glad he hasn't gotten around to bringing the Warrior Three and Lady Sif. Their basically his best friends, and I hate to imagine them."
"Yeah, just imagine that, 5 obnoxious aliens."
"So anyways your guys want to get our homework done?"
"Yeah, that way I don't have to freak out about it later."
We start on our homework but while we are getting it done I hear someone in the vents. Which means that Clint is going to end up in the room, well that's just great.
In a few seconds he does coming through one of the vents and almost landing on poor Peter. Who jumps away quickly and instinctually.
"Clint, I thought you were going to stay in the vents. Don't make me get Natasha."
"Oh come one you don't know where she is."
"JARVIS can you get Natasha down here?"
"No, I'm out. I'm out!" He runs out of the room and I smirk.
"I can understand why he ran."