He was kind of missed it when the sound of murmurs in the distance being heard. It was like the voice of a bunch of bees flying over between the trees on the hill behind his grandparents’ house. It was getting louder after sometimes. The weird thing was, there were sounds of honks on and on between it.
What is that?
He focused his mind on that sound and didn’t get it for a while until he almost fell on a deep slumber again. It was like a lullaby in his ears and he was enjoying it a lot. And when suddenly he realized it, it’s not the sound of the bees. It was just the voice of cars passing by down town. The busy street of the town was welcomed him again.
He opened his eyes and met with the bright morning sun shone in to the room throughout the not fully closed curtains. It was kind of smiled at him, asked him to wake up and faced the day with a bright smile and new spirit. The spirit of life which he forgot for who knows how long. He closed his eyes again before opened it and took a glance to the wall. Seven a.m.
Okay, it’s too early to wake up. And I’m in my own room. Again.
He was about to close his eyes again when a knock on the door bothered him.
“Yamato, breakfast’s ready. And you have a class at nine today.”
Fine. Another boring day is coming. Why can’t I just take today as a day off and sleep all day? We just came back from the country side few hours ago and I need more sleep. Didn’t he feel tired? What made him got up and too worked up this early morning?
He still felt tired and didn’t want to move from his bed. It was too comfortable and he was too lazy to step his foot outside the house so he closed his eyes and ready to sleep again.
“Yamato, you’d better get up now before Ryu break in to your room and drag you to the dining table.”
And why is he so noisy this morning? He never woke me up before. Why should Ryu … Ryu!
Suddenly he got up from his bed and stepped out the room. Yuichi welcomed him with a very wide smile, almost dazzling him, which honestly he missed so much.
“Come on, they’ve been waiting for you. Shin made African breakfast which I believe you will like it a lot.” Yuichi pushed him by his back to the kitchen.
“What are they doing here this early morning?” He mumbled along the way to the kitchen.
“It’s not early anymore. The sun is already shining brightly outside so get your ass out of your bed and let’s have breakfast together. A good start will make your day better than ever.”
Yamato rolled his eyes hearing his brother’s blabbering about the philosophy. But inside his heart he smiled. He missed it a lot. The brother of him who always encouraged him every day, gave him support with all his might, and always being there for him when he was down. He was the best brother he had ever had.
“Morning … “
He stopped by the door. He really saw Shin and Ryu sat on side by side in the dining table. “What are you doing here this early morning?”
“We’re living here starting from today.” Shin answered him flatly. There’s no tone in his words.
“This house is too big for you two. And my apartment is too small for both of us, so we’re moving here. Don’t worry, we will leave when Aunt Yoshiko come back.” Ryu smiled at the younger before sipping his coffee.
Yamato looked away. A part of his heart felt happy with their moving but he was also suddenly worried.
Did they find something about me? If so, how far they know? Did they tell grandpa about it?
It was too peace lately. He felt uneasy with this calm situation. He was enjoying the peace up until today but deep down his heart he still felt afraid that this was just another break before another unexpected encounter. He was still afraid that one day he would cross-path with his father somewhere and he would take him again. He was not ready to face another torture now. Not when he had decided and tried to build up his courage to face the future again. Not when he tried to open up his heart to his surrounding again. Not when he just got his brother back to him again. Not when everything started to move to the right direction again.
Suddenly he turned over and walked back to his room, not minding that Yuichi followed him along the way and budged him to come back to the dining room. Yamato didn’t even listen to him. He entered the bathroom and locked it. He sighed heavily in front of the mirror, looking at his own shadow which was only staring back at him too. His mind was full of his own thought. It was so hard to avoid Yuichi to not ask him when he came back with bruises all over his body. Now he had to face two other persons in his house. It didn’t mean that he hated them. No. It’s definitely not that. He was happy with their presence. But it’s not now. Not in this house where they would live everyday with him. What if they found out about what had happened to him? What should he say if they asked him where he got all the bruises? They found him once before and he could avoid their interrogating but he was not sure that he could do it again. Not when they lived together in one roof.
He looked straight to his eyes in the mirror.
If, I got another bruises. Nothing will happen if I stay safe. They won’t find anything suspicious on me if everything goes smooth like the last days.
He closed his eyes and prayed silently that these peaceful days would stay forever and never left him. He sighed before opened the faucet and washed his face. The cool water was felt like a slap on his face, as reminded him that he was thinking too much. He was stunned for a while before taking the water and washed his face once again. The coolness of the water calmed him down somehow. He felt it reached his brain and made it work slower than before.
Okay. Everything will be alright. I shouldn’t be worried with something doesn’t even happened yet. Everything will be definitely alright. Calm down. They will shower me with those questions I want to avoid forever if I looked nervous. I have to calm down. Okay, breath in, takes it out slowly. Right. I’m fine. Nothing will happen.
He slapped his own cheeks before finally decided to come out of the bathroom just to meet Yuichi welcomed him with a worried face.
“What took you so long in there?”
Yamato turned to him and stared at him for a while. “What do you think you’re doing when you’re in the bathroom?”
Yuichi looked back at him blankly. He suddenly realized that he was just asking a stupid question. “Sorry. I’ll wait for you in the dining table and I suggest you’d better go down there …, fast.”
With that he left Yamato in his room.
Stupid! Why should I ask that question? Isn’t it obvious that he did his own private business in that bathroom? Stupid Yuichi! Think first before you say something.
He sighed heavily before filling his glass with juice.
“You looked troubled. Something happened?” Ryu asked him after a moment of silent.
Yuichi looked at him and shook his head. “No. It’s nothing.”
“But you don’t looked like it’s nothing happened.”
Yuichi smiled at him. “I told you it’s nothing.”
“Did you just ask him stupid question?”
Yuichi stunned then looked at Shin who grinned at him mischievously. “Shut up!”
Ryu could only smile widely with his cousin’s stupidity. He was a smart but sometimes, unconsciously, he asked stupid questions without thinking about the result of his questions. It happened many times, a lot of times, before. “He did it again~”
“I told you to shut up. I didn’t ask him stupid question. I just asked him what took him so long inside the bathroom.”
Shin and Ryu stared each other and suddenly chuckled together.
“That’s what I mean about stupid question. Isn’t it obvious about what’s someone doing in the bathroom? No matter how long you take your time, there’re only few things you could do inside the bathroom.” Shin explained him about his question before.
“I knew it, so shut up. Just leave it and forget it, okay? I didn’t mean to ask him that question. It’s just … slipped out of my mouth. So just …, forget it.”
Shin knew. Ryu knew too. Why Yuichi suddenly burst out that question. He was just too worried with his brother. He was once heard him talking to himself, something about being disappear, so they knew that perhaps he thought he was doing something suspicious inside that room. He was just afraid that he would do something stupid, something he would regret. Something he didn’t even want to think in the first place. Something they didn’t want to think in the first place.
Yamato entered the dining room few minutes later and sat silently. He didn’t say anything while eating his breakfast, didn’t even take a glance to the other. Shin and Ryu were also just staring at him, tried to find another rejection but found nothing. There’s no expression on his face. He looked enjoyed the food and looked forgot at all that they were there. It made Yuichi sighed heavily.
“Could you at least say hello?”
Yamato looked at them and just nodded his head as a greeting.
“Yamato … “
“You always say that we shouldn’t talk while eating. Why you’re so noisy this morning?”
Yuichi silenced instantly. He couldn’t say anything because he knew that his little brother was right. He always scolded him when he tried to ask something while having their meal long before.
Shin and Ryu stared at each other, amused with the slight quarrel of the brothers in front of them. It felt so peaceful somehow, hearing the plain quarrel of a sibling in the morning. They felt like this was how a home should be.
Shin furrowed his eyebrows when Yamato finished his breakfast and walked back to his room. “You have class at nine, don’t you?”
“I’m skipping today. I want to sleep all day and I don’t want to be bothered even for lunch. See you.”
And he just walked away to the second floor, leaving them staring each other without words.
“Actually I planned to skip too today.” Shin said finally after a while.
“Me too~” Yuichi raised his hand.
Ryu could only stare at them, disbelief of what he had heard. “What? Am I the only one who will go outside today? That’s not fair. Come on! You can’t skip together like that?”
Ryu gaped for a moment. He then grabbed his bag and stood up. “Fine. I’m leaving then.” Slightly pouting he walked outside the house.
Ryu looked up to the sky to meet the very bright light of the sun. He sighed heavily. He wanted to skip too today but imagining how mad Yankumi could be, he decided to start to walk.
It was right after they took their lunch when they saw Yamato hurriedly walked down the stairs. He almost ran to the front door.
“Where are you going? You said you want to sleep all day.” Yuichi yelled at him from the kitchen.
“Ren’s got trouble.” And he disappeared with a loud bang on the door.
Yuichi and Shin could only stare each other.
“Who’s Ren?” Shin asked him flatly.
“A …, friend of him? I don’t know.”
Shin stared at him for a moment before fishing his pocket to reach his phone.
Pick it up, please, pick it up.
He prayed non-stop on the way to the place the other have waited for him. But the person he called didn’t pick the phone. It always ended with a busy tone. He groaned before deciding to give up. He ran along the street, sometimes stopped just to see that probably the person he’s been looking for was in those places but he didn’t find any sign of him.
Stupid. If I could find him that easy, the police would find him first.
The familiar voiced called him. He turned over and found Kuraki ran over to him.
“Any sign of him?”
He shook his head. “Where’re the others?”
“They went to Akadou.”
“Do you think Yankumi would stay back after she heard about this? I don’t think so.”
Yamato rolled his eyes.
That noisy teacher. Doesn’t she have her own business? Why should she meddle with others all the time? Doesn’t it enough for her to have Reita and his gang on her hand?
He followed Kuraki anyway. And he was right. They met her on the way and together they searched for Ren all over the town. They tried to find him on places he might visit but no sign of him. It was dark already when Ryu called them that he found Ren in the school. And after a little debate Yankumi forced him to stay over her place for the night which followed right away with the others.
It was too silent that night when Yamato opened his eyes. His body stiffened for the recognition of a new place. He stared the ceiling for a while. Hesitantly he turned to his side and faced with the familiar face, the face of Honjo, his best friend. He closed his eyes and sighed heavily in silent. He got up from the futon and slowly, tried to not make any noise, he walked out the room. He sat down by the terrace which faced by a little park. He looked up to the sky, tried to dive its darkness. Tomorrow, when the morning came, this darkness will fade away. It will be changed with the blue color. It will be changed into a really bright blue which make it looked so high and wide. It was always like that. The morning would always come to erase the darkness of the night.
I can’t give up. I have to fight no matter what. Nobody will save me if I surrender now. Nobody could help me if I don’t have a will to reach their hand. I have to fight. Even if I’ve being pushed down again, I have to get up by my own self. Just like the sky. It’s really dark at night, but tomorrow, when the sun rose and shone his light, it will be totally bright and beautiful.