So it was finally here. My seventeenth birthday. For once, getting up and dressed was easy. It wasn’t long before I was downstairs, eating a bowl of cereal, checking my texts at the same time. Although I wasn’t popular, the small group of friends I had were close. Rian had organised a party for my birthday, at his house around the corner from mine.
I didn’t know why I was excited. Normally, I avoided parties like this. I didn’t especially enjoy drinking alcoholic drinks, and being a lightweight didn’t help. The light headed feeling panicked me. I liked being in control, and remembering what happened the night before. I only had one blank spot in my memory, and didn’t intend to collect any more. Another downside to the parties hosted by members of my year was seeing Alex, either eating at some girls face, or worse, sneaking off to the bedrooms with them. However, I had no choice seeing as it was my party.
I’d come out to my closest friends two years ago, and got a boyfriend not long after by chance. But, as all good things, we hadn’t lasted past the three weeks mark. He had been a sex addict, and it had been all he wanted to do. I don’t think he ever actually liked me, and he only seemed to be upset about losing my body, rather than losing me as a person when I broke up with him. I was just his play thing. During this time, I’d told my mother about my sexuality, alongside my sister, May. They had both agreed to keep it from my Dad and Brother, Joe, as I wasn’t sure how they’d react. Merciless teasing from my brother, and endless jokes from my Dad at least. Worst case scenario: my Dad could disown me. I didn’t expect it to happen, but he’d never really made his view on homosexuality clear. My mother and May could both be trusted to accept me for who I am.
At school, I heard that Alex had instructed his friends not to bother with the party, as it would be dull. I also overheard his girlfriend screaming at him. From her absence in last class period of the day, I figured they’d probably broken up. I always felt bad for the girls, but secretly pleased that he was single again. It gave me a hope, that maybe, before he got another girlfriend, he would figure out he was gay, too. I always knew that this was too much to ask for, that he was straight, and always would be, but that didn’t stop the crazy side of my brain from hoping.
After school, I drove back to Rian’s place to help him get the place ready. We were expecting most of the year to turn up, seeing as it was also the last day of the school year. That made this first party of the summer. Normally, Alex or one of his friends threw the first party, but this year, it was actually on my birthday so Rian had jumped in and planned a party for me, especially since his parents were away so he would have a free house.
It didn’t take long to get the house ready. All that we really had to do was move breakables to safe places, where they wouldn’t get broken. Rian was a full time clean freak, so the house was already spotless. We also changed all the bedding, seeing as there would be people sneaking up to the bedrooms to hook up at the party, in typical drunken fashion. Rian’s bedroom and his parent’s bedroom were securely locked, leaving just the three of the four guest bedrooms unlocked for people.
“Jack, seriously, calm down. It’s just a party. And Alex
isn’t going to be here, so you don’t have to worry about watching him do his
thing. Okay?” Rian had spotted me looking very nervous while glancing at the
“But what if he does? And then he might end up doing it in the bathroom because all the bedrooms are taken. And then I might need the toilet, and either walk in on him and some girl because they forgot to lock the door, or end up stuck, needing the toilet, able to hear some girl screaming his name.” It was a genuine fear of mine. I had almost walked in on him several times before, and had actually walked in on him at one of my sister’s friend’s parties. The image had remained stuck in my head, and I was sure that I would never forget it. He hadn’t even noticed me though.
“That isn’t going to happen. And if it does, I will personally murder him, and wipe his existence from your memory.”
“But I don’t want to forget him. Fine, I’ll calm down.” At that point, the doorbell rang.