Regular Show: The Skull Master Saga

Chapter Four

"This is quite possibly the strangest thing I've ever seen." Death announced to the Members of the Anti-Skulls.

"It appears that wherever the Skull Master is…doesn't exist. There was a rare error while tracking the traces…my own best-of-the-best tech said that it didn't exist."

"Show me." Was all Techmo responded. Death punched a hole through the wall, then proceeded to widen it until it was the length of a doorway. Techmo stepped through the hole to witness a typewriter looking device, with a cup firmly fitted into a slot upon the left slide.

"Alright, Skips, I'll need your supernatural knowledge to back me up. How would one corrupt a trace sample, and what's the most likely corruption?"

The yeti stood up, and skipped through the hole, before the duo began messing with the device. Death watched on, seemingly in agony of his own tech being screwed with and modified.

"So…Hi-5, is it? Ever thought…if popcorn was infused with a gorlinat injection, would it become tastier or would it turn green and explode?" Jeremy asked the confused ghost sitting besides him.

"Um…it would probably turn green." The ghost said, with no knowledge on the topic.

"And explode?" Chad countered.

"Um…yeah. It'd go boom!" Hi-5 said, fidgeting nervously.

"But how big would the explosion be? Would it wipe out the city, or would it just spark a bit?" Jeremy said.

"Um…it would blow up the city?" Hi-5 said, thoroughly confused.

"But if it blew up the city, how much excess gorlinite energy would there be to contaminate the surrounding areas?" Chad said.

"Um…a lot?" Hi-5 responded.

"Well if a lot of gorlinite energy got together, would it contaminate, or would it be concentrated enough to just form a gorlinat extract which could be used for another injection for the popcorn?" Jeremy responded.

"DONE!" Techmo announced. The typewriter began printing on a piece of paper some coordinates…Death yanked it, and had his face show obvious pleasure in the results.

"How'd you do it?!"

"I just modified your device to decode the seal, and then Skips removed as much of the seal as he could on the trace itself." Techmo said, arrogantly.

"Well…we've got our location. Time to move on to…PHASE 57!" Death shouted.


Yulon was at the coffee shop. HELP WANTED. Another two words. But this time, they weren't golden. No, he seized upon a rather different HELP WANTED. Now that he had his job, these two words were just another way of saying that he couldn't have coffee. Upset at this, he went back to his job at the park, and resumed running the snack bar. If only the snack bar had coffee. He saw something that might've substituted: 'HI-ENERGY COFFEE BAR! EAT ONLY AS DIRECTED!'

Now that was strange. Why would 'eat only as directed' be on the wrapper? He didn't care. He just wanted his coffee. So, he promptly tore off the wrapper, and shoved the entire bar into his mouth. As he chewed, he stared at the only direction, which was in fine print under the ingredients: 'DON'T EAT AFTER EXPIRATION DATE.' So, it was telling him not to get sick? He turned the wrapper around and saw the expiration date: six years ago. Yulon swallowed, eyes widened, before realizing he just swallowed. Well…he was going to get a little sick, right? Nothing too bad. Suddenly, there was a terrible pain in his stomach. He clutched it, and watched in horror as his hand began twitching…and changing color. He fell to the floor of the snack bar as his transformation accelerated…


"YEEEEAAAAAUUUH!" Rigby chanted, as he high-fived Carson.

"That's ANOTHER challenge down!" the bird laughed.

"How much longer until six months have passed? We've got this prize in the bag!" Rigby yelled, still excited from his latest win.

"Well, about…five months."

"Wait a minute…one month has passed? That's like…a month since I've seen Mordecai." Rigby realized.

"You two will meet again. Then, we can be a trio." Carson said, with a smile.

"But, there's Eileen. And Muscle man. So, can be a five-o?" Rigby laughed nervously.

"No." was Carson's response.

"Oh, then. So…we just continue waiting for tomorrow?" Rigby said, disappointed.

"Or, we could search for him in between challenges." Carson said. The answer was so obvious, Rigby hadn't thought of it. The duo set off.


"We're here." Jeremy said, parking the intergalactic bus. Death, Hi-5, Techmo, Skips, and Chad climbed out of the bus and stared at a golden portal.

"I can't believe it's in an alternate reality." Chad said, impressed.

"Well, get to used to it. You'll be there for a while." Jeremy grinned. He pulled a laser gun from his pocket and shot the Anti-Skulls, all of which who had their guard down.

They began shouting their protest, but it couldn't be heard. Each of them now levitated, in a golden bubble, which couldn't be seen through. No sound could escape…but they could hear the outside world just fine. They could hear Jeremy shouting:


Chad, feeling especially betrayed, knocked himself out with some of the combat equipment the Anti-Skulls brought on their person, as they were prepared to face the Skull Master. When he came too, he only saw gold…still. He had no idea where he was, but he knew that his location had changed. He wished that the bubbles were bigger, so two could fit…if so, he could've been with someone to talk to and help him pass the time. But instead, he just had to sit and wait. No combat tool would work. Nothing would burst the bubble. He was trapped. And he had to deal with it.


The competitors woke up on a soft, dirt floor. As they got up, mumbling to themselves and whatnot, Rigby noticed the Skull Master observing them from the front, on top of a small, wooden platform. On it with him, was Margaret, no longer in a cage.


"And your queen." Margaret said, with a smile in her voice.

"Oh man…I'd hate to see Mordecai right now." Rigby whimpered. Carson didn't seem to hear.

"YOUR NEXT CHALLENGE IS TO GET ON THIS PLATFORM! EASY, RIGHT?! WELL, YOU HAVE TO STAY ON THE PLATFORM. AND THERE IS NOT ROOM FOR ALL OF YOU." The Skull Master bellowed. HE snapped his fingers, and the platform expanded, until it was huge. But even then, Rigby knew it was too small for every competitor.

"You ready, bro?" Carson asked.

"Hm? Uh..yeah. Sure." Rigby said, nervous.

The Skull Master then kissed Margaret, and she kissed back. It was plain to see. He snapped his fingers, holding her close, and the two of them disappeared.

"LETS GO!" Carson declared, and the huge crowd began their sprint.

"Mordecai, come on! Wake up!" Eileen shouted, slapping the birds cheeks. When he finally came too, it was plain to see tears in his eyes.

"Let me get eliminated. Leave me here." He whined.

"No! We're going to win and rescue Margaret!"

"She doesn't want to be rescued…"

"She's probably under a spell!"

"I don't care."


"Go on without me…"

Eileen frowned. Could But, her friend was at stake. But, she promised never to tell. So, she wouldn't. Instead, she thrust Mordecai's legs over her shoulders and began trudging to catch up with the crowd.

Carson was on the wooden platform. Rigby was not.

"Let him go." Carson said, firmly.

"Get off the platform, and make room." The muscular punk said, choking Rigby with one arm.

"Car….son…" the raccoon squeaked.

"Let. Him. Go." The bird repeated. The punk stepped onto the platform, on the very edge, next to Carson. Everyone on the platform was so smushed together, they couldn't move..except for the very edges, where competitors fought.

"Wanna fight? Because, I want to. You're getting eliminated…both of you." The punk said, irritated at being denied.

And he lunged towards Carson with his free hand.

To trust a stranger was hard. Especially when things were so competitive. But Eileen had to hand over Mordecai to the stronger man, who promised that he could save the bird. Apparently, he was so touched by her willingness to save her friend, he was going to help her. And Eileen couldn't refuse. She watched as the man began sprinting, and in a few moments, he was out of sight. The mole fell onto her knees and gasped for air. She had exerted her energy, and needed more. If only the man offered to carry her as well. She got up onto wobbly knees, and began walking forwards.

"SKULL MASTER! SKULL MASTER!" the mole chanted, staring at the poster. She was going to win that ultimate prize. Six months well spent.

How could she have been so stupid? But, she needed motivation. What could it be?

"Eileen…" the raccoon said, through pure white teeth. It was a daydream, and a pleasant one, where she danced with her love…

"Rigby…" she said, smiling.

"Rigby…" the mole said, now in the present, determined to not get eliminated. She began sprinting, running on new-found adrenaline and energy. She kept on calling for Rigby as she ran, nearing the crowd.

Rigby could not move. Could not talk. Could not see clearly. He was wedged between two girls by Carson. The bird had evaded the lunge, and while the punk was off-balance, seized the advantage and tackled him. The punk had released the raccoon. Rigby remembered being picked up by Carson, and shoved into the crowd. He wasn't shoved far from the edges…but far enough as to where he was squeezed so tightly, he knew his bones were breaking. Extreme pain filled his body, but he still hoped the bird was alright.


Mordecai was being pummeled. The man carrying him had been caught, and had his neck snapped. He had fallen, and Mordecai had been snatched. The man that snapped the neck had called to his friends. And now, they were beating the blue jay to death. The platform was so close too…they could have their fun, then jump on the platform last minute to secure their spot. If they jumped before then, they'd be thrown off. The edges were packed with furious fights. So, they passed the time eliminating competition.

A brown bird was tossed onto the battered body of the blue one.

"Ugh…" Carson groaned, still trying to regain focus.

"HEY! LET'S BEAT HIM UP TOO!" the gang called, happily and merrily.

"No way! That one's mine!" the punk said, approaching the gang.

The gang quickly surrounded the punk, their attention off of Carson and Mordecai.

"Ugh…I hope Rigby's okay." Carson said, as he stealthily began to sneak away.

"Riiiggbbbyyy…" the blue bird moaned. Carson turned and saw the blue bird.

"You know him?" Carson asked.

"I'm…M-M…M…M…" the bird stuttered, trying to speak.

"Mordecai?" Carson asked again. The bird gave a weak thumbs-up…

Carson had to reevaluate his options. The gang would be tired of beating the punk soon…could he rescue Mordecai? He was in pretty bad shape himself. No, there was no way…unless…

Carson grabbed Eileen and threw her into the middle of the gangs circle, on top of the punk. The gang grinned and beat their new target, to dumb to realize she was just used to buy the brown bird some time. He grabbed Mordecai and began dragging him towards the platform…

The Skull Master appeared, floating over the platform.

"TIME'S ALMOST UP! HOPE YOU'RE ON THE PLATFORM!" he announced. Mordecai's battered and misshapen body was easy to fit into the bulk that was the crowd. He fit like a puzzle piece between a cat, a dog, and a living fire hydrant. Two edgee's, like Carson distracted the fight, and signaled a thumbs-up to the brown bird. Not everyone in this competition was evil…

Carson quickly tried to squeeze himself into the tightly packed block. There was no room. Unless…

He found a little girl, and, remembering Mordecai, began beating her legs, until she fell and left a gap in the block. He squeezed himself into the gap, which could only fit the smallest mouse…but, through adrenaline, and luck, he squeezed himself in, breaking many of his bones while doing so.

The gang, upon hearing the announcement, left their victims and sprinted towards the platform. Eileen, however, latched onto one of their arms, by biting. She hoped her teeth wouldn't fail her in their shining moment…the gang member didn't even try to shake her off. He was just desperate to get on the platform.

"5!" The Skull Master yelled.

The gang member jumped, just inches away.


An edgee slapped the member off the edge.


The member is on the ground, in shock. Eileen is too weak to move on her own, and her teeth are slipping.

"2!" The Member tears Eileen off his arm.

"Mama said I'd go down heroically...didn't think I'd go down. But, I can't let her down!"


The member throws Eileen, and she lands next to the hostile edgee, who recoils upon seeing the disgusting form of her beat-up body.


The gang member begins shaking in fear, as he is enveloped in a yellow light and beamed away, along with many others. It is the biggest elimination yet.

The Skull Master snapped, and in a minute, everyone is spread out again, into a crowd. A warmth fills many of them, including Rigby, Mordecai, Carson, and Eileen.

"Thanks man!" Mordecai says, walking up to Carson.

"Yeah, well, couldn't let Rigby down. I'd never forgive myself." Carson laughed, replying.

"Where is Rigby anyway?" Mordecai asked.

"I fit him in somewhere…aw, the irony. First, I'm with him trying to find you, and now I'm with you trying to find him."

"Well, we'll find him." Mordecai said, finding a reason to live again. So what if Margaret was gone? He would save her! Alongside Rigby and Eileen of course.

"Is it okay if we…"

"A group of five is not okay. I went over this with Rigby." Carson said with a sigh.

"Not five. How about…four?"

Carson stood still, considering it.

"Perhaps." Was all he said. The two birds stuck together, and talked, while Rigby and Eileen found themselves among strangers, with no friends or allies…

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