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A Trip to Hawaii
“C’mon Chewie land it right there on the beach,” Luke Skywalker said to Chewbacca. Luke and Chewbacca were on their way to Hawaii for a vacation. They were looking to get away from things back in space, but little did they know that their problems would follow them. Luke and his adversary, Darth Vader, are long time foes. Darth Vader and his stormtroopers have followed Luke to Hawaii like white on rice.
Luke and chewbacca landed their aircraft on an abandoned beach on the North Shore of Oahu, Hawaii. As Luke and Chewbacca split up to do their desired activities, the spaceship was locked by Chewbacca. Chewbacca went deep sea fishing. Luke on the other hand, decided to go the casino and gamble to win some extra cash like James Bond. Luke caught a ride downtown from Cash Cab where he won fifty bucks and was dropped off at The Bellagio. The Bellagio is known worldwide for having some of the most venal dealers. Roll after roll after roll, Luke lost more and more and more money. When Luke had nothing left he decided to gamble his own opulent lightsaber. The lightsaber was won by the dealer and Luke lost it forever.
As Luke was walking away in defeat he heard a gunshot. Luke turned around and “BAM, BAM, BAM,” three laser bullet shots zoom past his enlarged head. Four stormtroopers were sprinting full speed at Luke, guns armed and ready. As soon as Luke saw them he swiftly darted out the front door. He pulled a taxi driver out of his cab like he was in Grand Theft Auto. Luke didn’t know how to drive a car at this time but he was a cab driver now because he looked in the backseat and there was Obi Wan Kenobi. Luke annoyingly begged Obi Wan to help him. Obi Wan told Luke, “I have a mountain house outside of town, we can go hideout there.”
“Great! will you teach me how to use a gun?” asked Luke.
“Yes of course. Do you want to use a sniper or a shotgun?” proclaimed Obi Wan.
“Ehhhh do you wave a semi-automatic machine gun?” said Luke.
Obi Wan responded, “Yes it is powerful though.”
Luke stated, “That is fine, what are we going to shoot at?”
“Don’t worry I’ve got an idea,” Said Obi Wan.
By this time they had arrived at the mountain getaway. Obi Wan took look to his armory as soon as they got there because he feared the stormtrooper had followed them. Luke was nonchalant s he walked in. Once he was inside the armory he was extremely energetic. The gun Luke Picked was a perfect match for him. Luke asked Obi Wan, “Ok I’m ready, what are we going to shoot at?”
Obi Wan replied, “Ewoks”.
Right then he pulled a lever and out of a cage 25 ewoks ran and scattered in the woods. Luke looked at Obi Wan and Obi Wan nodded signaling Luke to go ahead. Luke started off by missing his first three shots. After that he got the hang of it killing 10 ewoks with 12 shots. Luke decided not to chase the ewoks but to let the ewoks come to him. Luke skulked through the bushes to the nearest tree he could scale. Once he was up in the tree five ewoks came wobbling by and he dropped all five with five bullets. Right when Luke was getting settled he heard a “BAM.” He turned the other way “BAM.” He turned the opposite way “BAM.” Every way Luke turned he heard, “BAM, BAM, BAM.” What was going on? Then he heard that distinct sound of the stormtroopers marching.
Closer and closer Luke heard them marching. This was more than just four stormtroopers it could be ten or twenty. Finally, Luke sees fifteen stormtroopers match over the hill. The tree Luke was up in was right on the road that led to the getaway. Step by step by step they became closer and closer. Luke didn’t know what to do, he didn’t have enough time to process a decision. Then all of a sudden you heard a loud crunch of leaves and they suddenly turned into animals in a cage. The stormtroopers had fallen into a thirty feet deep pit and they starting yelling. Right then Obi Wan jumped out of a tree and shot fifteen times killing all fifteen. Obi Wan was Luke’s savior.
“Obi Wan, how did you get up there without my seeing you?” asked Luke.
Obi Wan responded with, “ don’t you worry about that Young padawan.”
So Luke and Obi Wan carried on filling in the hole that the stormtroopers had fell in. That hole turned into a mass grave for the stormtroopers.
“Hey Luke, can you do me a favor?” Obi Wan asked breaking the silence.
“Sure, What is it?”
“Well I am a supercilious Hawaii football fan and we need some help on our football team. And so I was thinking maybe you could go and enroll at Hawaii and join the football team and win us a game or two. What do you think?”
“Well I’ve never played football before but I will just for you Obi Wan.”
So here Luke was three days later in a Hawaii Rainbow Warriors uniform ready to play his first game. As Luke heard his name called over the speaker he became an enthusiastic jock. His first snap of football ever he scored a touchdown. This was Hawaii’s first touchdown in over a decade. Luke played receiver which he had an unfair advantage over every other player because he had the force. The coaches were quick in realizing this so the just said to throw it up to Luke every play and he scored every play. Luke broke the NCAA record that day with forty-five touchdowns on forty-five receptions for 1,523 yards. Now that is a record that can never be broken. After the game Luke had an eerie feeling about something he just couldn’t tell what it was. All the fans were chanting his name, all the cheerleaders were asking for his number, he was the big man on campus. After all the madness and all the fans had cleared out Luke felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around and saw him standing right in his face. It was Darth Vader.
“Good game son,” said Darth Vader.
Then Darth Vader reared back and punched Luke square in the nose. Luke dropped to the ground like he just got RKO’d. Luke sprinted off and hijacked another taxi. As Luke looked in the rearview mirror behind him, he saw Darth Vader take another car and ten or so cops chasing them. This wasn’t new to Luke after all this was the second taxi he had stolen this week. Luke thought he had lost Darth once he got back to the mountain getaway.
“Hey Luke great game man!” said Obi Wan.
“Thanks, can’t talk right now, Darth Vader is chasing me! Where’s my gun?”
“Ohhh well you see I had to take your gun to the mountaintop to finish off those ewoks and I left it up there”
“Shoot, If I don’t make it back find Chewbacca and tell him I love him, ok?”
“Uhhhh yea sure man, good luck! Kill that old fart once and for all.”
Luke embarked on his trek to the top of the mountain. Warily but steadily he made progress. An hour later he was at the top. Once he got to the top he looked to his left and there was a road. Standing there staring right at him was Darth Vader. Storming was Darth Vader right for Luke. They met in the center of the mountaintop. Punching and kicking they fought. Steadily punching Luke gained an advantage.
“Easy comes, Easy goes. Old man,” said Luke to Darth Vader.
“You’re a crafty fighter Luke Skywalker, but I have a lightsaber and you don’t!”
Then Darth Vader quickly pulled out his lightsaber. Luke panicked. What would he do, what could he do. Then he remembered what he had come up to the mountain to retrieve. His gun! He looked around quickly before Darth moved in on him. Luke spotted the all black gun twenty yards behind Darth. Luke knew exactly what he was going to do. Run. Luke sprinted quietly around the edge of the mountaintop which was a field of grass. Darth Vader spotted him and ran after him but he wasn’t as quick as Luke. Luke dove and grabbed the gun and he turned into a Navy Seal. Rolled over and shot three times right into Darth Vader’s chest. Darth Vader fell to his knees and dropped face first to the ground. It was over. No more running. No more fighting.
Luke returned to the mountain getaway where he told the story to Obi Wan. He thanked him graciously. Luke had to return home now his vacation actually just caused more stress on him. Luke returned to the beach where the spaceship was untouched. At the same time Luke arrived so did Chewbaca. They loaded up and took off back home.
“So Chewbaca what did you do?”