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Widow's Hill Notes to Dark Shadows

By Graeme Cree

Horror / Humor

Episode 29

EPISODE 29: When David visits Burke in his hotel room, Burke discovers that David tried to slip Roger's bleeder valve under the sofa, where it would no doubt have incriminated Burke about 10 years from now.

Carolyn returns from searching for David. She checked out all her old hiding places: the powder room, the lingerie department at Macy's, the nail salon, but David wasn't at any of them. Liz says she'll never forgive Miss Winters if David doesn't turn up again. Carolyn will never forgive her if he does, so Vicki is pretty much screwed either way.

Burke returns to his hotel room, only to have some 10 year old kid stick his foot in the door when he arrives. Burke offers to buy a subscription to Boy's Life, but it turns out that the kid is David Collins. David says that the reward for him is only up to a dollar and a half, so it's not really worth Burke's time to turn him in yet.

Burke chalks David's presence up to natural curiosity ("I bet you always wanted to see what a superman looked like".) Burke offers David a "Burke Devlin Special", which turns out to be a half dozen fruit juices (coincidentally, all of which have bought advertising time on the show).

From an ex-con, David had expected something a little more medicinal, but he figures he's got plenty of time for his first hangover later, when he's a teenager. When Burke goes to the kitchen, David tries to hide the bleeder valve under Burke's sofa cushion. He has a hard time finding a place to stuff it, though, what with all the loose change in there (one of the hazards of sitting on a millionaire's couch).

At Collinwood, Vicki suggests calling the Police to help look for David. Liz is more concerned about finding a reason why the whole matter is actually Vicki's fault. It would be Vicki's fault for finding the valve in David's drawer... if she did. But Liz has decided that she really didn't. Liz offers to blame Vicki for lying about finding the valve, if Vicki will agree not to quit over being accused, but Vicki refuses to play along. Liz tells Vicki she needs to be more flexible. Vicki again suggests that Liz ask the Police to look for David, but she doesn't dare. David is #8 on their Ten Most Wanted List.

Vicki goes up to her room. Carolyn drops by to offer her some company. Vicki turns her down, but regrets it when she realizes that when a Collins offers you "company", it's either GM or AT&T.

Back at the Inn, Burke and David are palling around and swapping stories like old friends. Burke offers David another of his special concoctions. David says it's just a Coke, but Burke says that when he buys the company next week, it will be a Burka-Cola. David thinks it should be a hit among Muslim women.

Burke and David talk about Collinwood. Burke mentions how well he used to know the place. Burke and David's dad used to be good friends. And Burke and David's mother used to be... even more than that. David says he knows that Burke hates Roger now. Burke tries to downplay it. "Hate" is such a strong word. He wouldn't say that he "hates" Roger. David says he doesn't care if Burke says it as long as he does it.

Back at Collinwood, Carolyn and Liz go at it over whether David is the one that sabotaged Roger's car. Liz says it's ridiculous. Kids don't try to kill their parents. Carolyn says Freud says that they do. Liz answers that Freud only says that they WANT to, but that they channel that energy into mowing lawns, playing chess, and having sex instead.

Carolyn counters that if she'd met Paul Stoddard when she was David's age, she'd have gladly killed him for abandoning herself and Liz. Liz points out that if Carolyn had met Paul Stoddard at that age, it would mean that he hadn't abandoned them, and she'd have no reason to kill him. Carolyn cites this as an example of how unfair life is.

Liz still isn't willing to admit that David is guilty, though. After all, the valve was found in Vicki's room, not David's. Maybe Vicki did it. Liz admits she doesn't really believe that... but she would believe it if the Constable would.

A call from Maggie interrupts the debate. Maggie tells Liz that David has been seen at the Collinsport Inn, and can someone please come and get him before he scares the rest of the customers away? Liz sends Carolyn to get him, praying that David will be okay until she can get him back home and kill him.

Liz goes up to apologize to Vicki for not believing her, and finds Vicki about to open her window seat!! Liz warns her not to. There may be some deep, dark family secret in there... Or maybe not, but no point taking any chances. Liz muses that she should have put Vicki in a declassified bedroom.

Liz apologizes to Vicki for not believing her story. And for thinking Vicki was a kook or a liar. And for buying a spare bleeder valve at True-Value and hiding it under Vicki's pillow. After seeing Vicki's reaction to this, Liz resolves from now on to only apologize to people for things they already know about.

Back at the Inn, David takes stock of all the things he and Burke have in common. They both get in trouble without deserving it. They both hate Roger Collins. They both want to rule the world. They both think girls are icky and frogs are cool. Burke has to disagree on that last one, but reasons that at least if he and David DO take over the world together, it will be easy to divvy up the swag.

David wishes his father was more like Burke. Burke says mysteriously that maybe he is. After all, Burke and Laura were pretty good "friends" back in the old days (nudge, nudge). It's a great theory, but the show's future storylines make it pretty clear that little boys who look like David Henesy grow up to look like Louis Edmonds.

Burke asks David why he really came to Burke's room. David says it's because his father and his mother fought about Burke all the time and he wanted to see which of them was right.

It's getting late, so Burke offers to drive David back to Collinwood. David says he needn't bother, he can just hotwire a car or something. Burke tells him to forget it. ("With my luck, you'd pick mine".)

Burke sends David into the closet to wash up (there are no bathrooms on TV), and while he's gone, Burke retrieves the bleeder valve from under the sofa cushion. Burke muses about what to do. Normally he'd kill someone for trying to frame him. On the other hand, he hates to kill someone who's trying to kill Roger. On the third hand, if David kills Roger, there will be nothing left for Burke. On the fourth hand... Burke is out of hands.


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