Chapter 2 - Knowledge
“Preventing is all well and good, but what if it fails, what then?” That was the guiding principle behind raising Reapers like me, but still, what were the odds that we would be effective?
Cantus is intrinsically tied to intention, be it conscious or unconscious. The biggest difference between regular people and those who are Karma Demons or Fiends therefore, is the source of the intention applied to their Cantus. This was the basic reasoning behind trying to use children without Cantus like me to kill such a dangerous thing like a Fiend.
For a normal person, killing results in a Death-Feedback, therefore, for them any sort of permanent solution to a fiend is a double-edged sword. I must admit I was impressed that the priests were able to tell us, a group of children being raised to assassinate psychics, such a truth. On the other hand, I suppose that it’s better for them if they know that we know, instead of hiding such a thing and having us figure it out on our own with them none the wiser.
And that’s it. My place in the world was to learn a way to bypass people’s unconscious defenses and murder them in cold blood. For that, a few things were necessary.
How many rats and other small animals was I made to kill? I can’t quite remember, but I think I was hesitant at first, until I was kindly reminded that I was not useful unless I was capable of killing. How delightfully cruel it all was.
Apart from these gruesome games, I was also made to learn many things: Ancient Civilization’s martial arts, social norms as a way to blend in, psychology, theoretical Cantus, among other things. Don’t you think it funny? They were doing their best to raise me as some sort of psychopath, just so I could kill psychopaths with special powers.
Oh, I also had to follow a strict training regimen, which apparently was used during the ancient days for elite troops.
What can I say? They were doing their best to turn me into a sort of killing machine, I still find it baffling that it never occurred to them that something like this could backfire, but I suppose such an absolute power like Cantus can blind people in such a way. Those who can use Cantus are so arrogant, that much we can agree on.
I was made to live such a life for many years, secluded in that church, isolated from any meaningful human interaction, after all for the priests I was nothing more than a talking tool, something to be raised into something useful. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t resent them or anything, but you know, I wasn’t all that attached to that place.