Chapter 7 – Love
How long? How long did I spend inside that cave? For how long did I speak with her? I can’t quite remember, but I guess it doesn’t matter, all we did was talk about boring things, yes, boring things. So why did it end in such a way? It shouldn’t have happened like that, but then again, there was probably no other way for it to end.
I sat over her, my knife over her throat, my one and only weapon, that which was to take her life. “Do it, you must!” How was I feeling then? Did I cry? I’m not too sure now. I think I was trembling. Oh, no, I’m quite sure I was.
“I can’t! Don’t make me!” That was the first conversation that we had which wasn’t dreadfully boring, and yet… It’s the one I hated the most.
“You can! You should. Please, I don’t want to give you a fate worse than death. Just do your job, please!” Hah, now that I think of it, that was the first time in a long time that I hesitated to kill something. It was strange, that had been the idea all along: I’d talk to her in order to lower her unconscious guard, but, at the same time, something changed inside of me, something which made it so hard for me to finally slide that knife across her neck.
“That was your objective from the start, wasn’t it? So, why can’t you do it now? Do it!” She knew, oh yes, she knew. But it was all within my predictions; due to their evil and unconscious influence on the world, most Karma-Demons have suicidal tendencies, but they have to contend with their unconscious defense.
And yet, there I was, able to completely bypass all of that. But I hesitated. I kept hesitating, why? “Do it! Do it! Do it! Oh please! Kill me… I don’t want to do that again to someone I love…”
Right, right! That’s why I hesitated so much! In that short amount of time, I couldn’t help but fall in love with her, all because of all that boring conversation.
In that moment I knew, I realized it. We loved each other so much, but there was no other choice that destiny left us. So, gripping tightly my knife, I did what I had to do and gently slid it on her beautiful throat. “Thank you…” Those were the words she left me.
A million, or perhaps only a couple, were the images that flashed through my mind. One of them was the beautiful smiling face of a young woman.I never bothered to check under the mask if that was her face. To me, nothing was more beautiful than that mask.