Babies are Their Specialty

Chapter 5

Mindy made sure her cell camera, which she had retrieved from Danny's coat pocket, only showed her face. "Hello everyone! I have just now taken four, count 'em, four different pregnancy tests. That's right, haters!" She held up a pregnancy test box to the lens. "I'm taking my first prego test as a married woman. Now, I have," she checked her watch, "six minutes to go before the big 'yes' or 'no'. Danny, the man who has (potentially) knocked me up, is running the highly accurate blood test as we speak. But don't worry folks, he won't peek. Stay tuned."

She paused the video. "Stay tuned because no one should ever see anyone getting off of the potty." She got up and started to shimmy her pants up when her eyes darted to the four sticks sitting on the ledge in front of the mirror. Chastising herself, she closed her eyes so she couldn't peek, then reached a hand out for the sink. "It's not been long enough anyway," she told herself as she washed her hands.

She was reaching for the paper towels when her hand hit something sitting on the edge of the sink which fell with a 'kerplunk' into the toilet.

Mindy squeezed her eyes shut even tighter for a second and shook her head. “No. No. No. Nope," she whispered in horror. Opening her eyes, she saw her beloved link to the world sink a little bit further into the ceramic bowl. "Oh no!"

She quickly grabbed a specimen jar that they kept in a basket by the toilet and used it to scoop out her phone.

Now wearing his dr.'s coat ('cause the lab was a little chilly) Danny was indeed pacing outside the door. He'd just had a helluva time with the spectrometer. It had been a while since he'd run the tests himself and someone had added half a million buttons to the damn thing since the last time he'd used the machine. He was debating asking Mindy to draw up another tube (just, ya know, in case they had to run it again for some reason) when the restroom door flew open to reveal a visibly distraught Mindy.

He'd taken one step towards her when she burst into tears and threw herself into his arms.

"Hey! Hey, now," He kissed the top of her head and then rubbed his cheek against her hair. "I knew it. I knew you wouldn't be able to resist looking at the test," he teasingly admitted. "It's all right, Min. We still have the blood test, remember? I've got the readout lying face down in the lab." He told her as she blubbered into his shoulder. "And even if it's a solid, unequivocal 'no', we'll just keep trying until it's a 'yes'. Right?"

She mumbled something against his neck.

"What was that, sweetheart?"

"I said I dropped my phone in the toilet!" She hiccupped. "I'd taken a video of the tests and explained what we were doing and I was going to post it to YouTube so everyone could see it and we could watch it whenever we wanted and show it to our kids and now it's ruined!" She finished on a wail.

Danny took a deep breath and patted her back as she dropped her head back down and sobbed. "You dropped your phone into the toilet?"

Mindy nodded her head.

He took her by the shoulders and scooted her back so he could glare at her. "That's why you're crying? Not because you're not pregnant?"

She sniffed and shook her head, then gave him a girly punch to the stomach. "The only reason I knocked it in in the first place was because I was trying to wash my hands and everything with my eyes closed so that I wouldn't accidentally see the results."

"Really?" Touched, he took her face in his hands and wiped her tears away with his thumbs. "You exhibited patience and kept a promise? Who are you and what have done with my wife?"

She batted his hands away. "Ha ha. Very funny, Danny." She gestured to the restroom. "That phone only had the once in a lifetime video of a moment I can't recreate. Plus!" She threw up her arms. "It had the timer for the tests on there. We're going to have add on ten extra minutes just to be sure!"

He grabbed her hand and pulled her in for another hug. "I'm sorry, Min. I know how much you love your phone." He felt safe rolling his eyes from that position. "Look, you had that puff-thingy on, right?"

She pulled back so he could appreciate her entire confused expression. "The what?"

"The cloud. The cloud thing that saves your stuff in a place you don't know and God knows who can look at it!" He waved vaguely at the ceiling. "You know, when you were making fun of me about my old-man phone you went on and on about how things like videos and pictures were automatically saved."

"Oh my God!" She jumped up and down. "You're right!" she threw her arms around him once more. "My cinematic monologue masterpiece still exists!"

He gave her a quick kiss once she stopped bouncing. "We'll get you a new phone first thing in the morning, but for now..."

They froze as a weak, but audible, alarm came from the restroom.

They both came in and stared at the phone sitting stacked on a pile of paper towels. As they watched, her phone gave one last sad blip and died.

They looked at each other and then at the tests lining the shelf.

"You took four?"

"Uh huh. So we could each look at two."

"Good plan. Good plan." He wiped a sweaty hand on his slacks and took a step forward, reaching for the sticks. "Wait!" He yanked his hand back and looked around the room. "Which ones did you use? I've got to read the directions or I'm not going to know what I'm looking at."

Mindy grabbed the tests and shoved two into his hands. "Cool your jets. I picked which ones to do based on whether or not they had the plus and the negative signs. None of that ambiguous crap where you had to count lines, thank you very much."

"Good. Good thinking. Hey," he pulled out his phone and set it up by the mirror, well away from the toilet. "Do you want me to record this?"

"Seriously? Do you even have to ask?" she squealed. She waited until he'd pushed record, then thanked him with a kiss. "I love you, Danny."

"I love you, too." He said with a smile. "Now let's do this thing on three. Ready?" She nodded. "Okay. One, two, three!"

Danny looked at his sticks and stared. There they are. Two plus signs, clear as day.

"Mindy," he whispered, his eyes still on the positive, his voice rough with emotion.

Her, ‘Well which one is it you stupid pieces of plastic!’ had him jerking his eyes away from his own results to the ones that she held. "What did you get?"

Mindy held up the two sticks to display one positive and one negative.

He held up his and showed her his two positives.

Her lip started to wobble as she looked from her positive to his positives. "Oh my God, Danny." Then she threw up her hands. "Damn it! Why did you have to get the two positives? Now I'm all Doubty McDoubterson about these stupid tests." She pushed him towards the doorway. "Get out. I'm going to do a few more until I get two positives in a row."

Danny laughed and set both of their tests aside. "Hey. Doc." He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her enough so that they were face to face. He had no doubts. With her flush against him he imagined he could feel the pulse of life that they had created together. "Do you remember why we're in our office at 1AM?"

She leaned her forehead against his and closed her eyes. "To run a definitive blood test."

"That's right, sweet cakes." He rubbed his nose against hers. "The results are in the lab. I ran the quantitative too," he told her, speaking of the test which, if she were pregnant, would give them an idea of far along. He gave her a kiss and set her back on the floor. "Let's go."

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