Chapter 5: Still water
Quirrel opened his eyes. He felt better than he had done in several months. But there was this aching in his heart that he knew had nothing to do with Azkaban. He was exhausted after the 5 months he had spent there, and starved. He took up his wand that he had gotten back when he left the prison. Two minutes later, he sat eating food, not even noticing what he was eating.
Now that his stomach was full, the pains in his chest got worse. He had been a virgin all his life, and never felt true love before. And stupid as he was, he had gone and fell in love with the dark lord, of all people. He had taken Voldemort for something he was not. Voldemort wasn't kind and fun, as he had thought. He had betrayed him, and left him to rot in Azkaban, to be tortured because of a murder the dark lord himself had committed. And then he went and got himself killed... Still, Quirrel could not stop loving, his heart stop hoping.
Quirrel threw a flat small stone into the lake, and it jumped a couple of times on the surface before it sank. Silent tears fell down his cheeks again, he wondered how a human being could cry this much. He walked to the edge of the lake, and stood there looking at it. It was a beautiful lake; the only disturbance was his tears dripping into the water. He thought about just walking out, until the water was above his head, and then taking a deep breath. He could almost feel the water rushing down his throat into his lungs. If he could only drown his sorrows in this beauty... Nevertheless, he couldn't bring himself to do it. There was still a part of him that hoped beyond hope, waiting for a miracle.