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Allegiant: How it Should have Ended

By truebluedez

Adventure / Romance

Tris

“I didn’t come here to steal anything, David.”

  I twist and lunge toward the device. The gun goes off and pain races through my body. I don’t even know where the bullet hit me.

  I can still hear Caleb repeating the code for Matthew. With a quaking hand I type in the numbers on the keypad.

  The gun goes off again. I think I have reached my pain threshold, or possibly it’s just the adrenaline running through me because this time I don’t feel the bullet hit me.

  I start to fall, and slam my hand into the keypad on my way down. A light turns on behind the green button. I hear a beep and a churning sound.

  As I slide to the floor, my vision blurring, I turn and notice a slumped figure behind David. It’s Caleb, a gun held in his shaking hand. I keep myself awake long enough to hear his last words.

  “I’m sorry, Beatrice,” he says, his voice barely audible, “I love you.”

  I watch him take his last shaky breath before blacking out.


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Further Recommendations

CookieMonster911: The story overall was an adventure that is appealing to any age. The way the characters develop adds a more human characteristic to the novel. The writing style itself is amazing because you can learn every character's thoughts and emotions. The awkward love triangle and jerk moments adds to the ...

heavyreader: great scifi novels but needs a better spell checker (check auto-substitution level) and grammar checker!!! otherwise, ready for mass market publishing!!

Hudson: Your story was fantastic Erin! The Rising Sun was one of the first stories I read on Inkitt, and I have to say I don't regret the three to four days I spent pouring through the story.Probably the biggest strength I see in your writing is your characterisation of Eliana, Oriens, and the rest of th...

catd69: Karim is a very talented writer. When I started reading his journey it took me into the book and I was in the story till the end. I've never felt this way with any other writers stories. If you want to read a gripping adventure, this will be the one book I would suggest you pick.

Ruby0h: Overall I thought your story was really good! It drew me in right away and kept me interested as the story progressed. I loved the character of Kayla being inserted into this story, and the way she affected and shaped the life of the original story into something totally new and interesting. I lo...

Dru83: This is the second or third time I've read this one and I just love it. It has just about everything you could ever want packed into one scifi story. It still has some parts that are a little rough in terms of grammar, punctuation, and word usage, but it's still an awesome story. I love how detai...

sarahsweet898123: I loved the story ... its was fascinating. ... cant put it down.... the way it was written....was so beautiful. .. the details. .. especially the characters. ..I loved them so much ... Garrick and mairi... every time there was some kind of attraction. ... just cant help it .... no words to express

salma elsamy: it's really awesome , and I really like the whole idea of the story . I also love how simple the vocabularies because English is my second language and the simplicity of the story is great for me . And I will definitely buy it if it's published.

Melissa Barras Trahan: If you enjoy reading a thriller with twists and turns, this is the book for you. When you think you have the story figured out.....the author surprises you and then the whole story changes again until the very last page! The further along I got, the faster things changed. Even though this is a ...

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Castro Ohana: This book is a great read. I can't wait for the next one (I hope there is another). Like my title I could not put it down! It has just the right amount of drama, actions and wow moments. I also love it when the person you least expected becomes the hero. A few grammar errors but overall a great...

themyronus: Vanessa has made 'amazing' the norme. I didn't want to read this as I am waiting for the finished and polished book to come out. But then I decided to read one chapter for kicks...well hours later I finished what was posted. Fortunately, my memory is not to good and I hope I will read the book wi...

263Adder: Okay so I adore this story. I only knocked one star off plot for historical inaccuracies because I'm a bit of a stickler for that. The ending broke my heart though, considering you already changed history couldn't you (SPOILER) change it a bit more and have them together!!!! I want an alternative...

JenniferParks: This story is very progressive. I like the main characters so far ( i am on chapter 5) and i am hoping to read more chapters. The writing, style, plot and everything is so far so good, i can really understand and read the story very well.The story really sticks to its themes and its target audi...