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Life must go on(no matter what)

By buffymaniac

Adventure / Action

Life and death

Phoebe wiped the tears away from her face and looked at herself in the mirror. There was no more trace of the naive girl she had been in her past.A lot had changed since when Prue had died and she had become a big sister. She had found herself a job and she had even married,though the marriage per se had been a total failure,but never could she have imagined that she would have been in this situation again. To her it only seemed like yesterday that she had buried her eldest sister and now she was gonna have to do this again. However she needed to be strong,just like her big sisters had taught her. Because when you lose your older sister,you become the next one and you need to be a good one;there's no other way to go on. Right there and then she was grateful to have learned enough to keep going,to continue her big sisters'job. So she was gonna get out of her damn room and check out on Paige,because she needed to be comforted. She needed to do what Piper had done with her on Prue's funeral day,to make her know that she still had somebody to feel safe with. She needed to give her back what she had given her when she herself was suffering. She had kept her from going down,from feeling that deep anguish everyday and from feeling anymore guilty than she already was. Phoebe softly walked out of the room and stopped in front of her baby sister's door. All those who didn't know Paige could've thought that her room was submerged in an almost creepy silence,but Phoebe knew her well enough to know that not hearing anything didn't mean that Paige,who didn't like sharing her emotions,wasn't screaming inside and trying to push everything away,to convince herself of the fact that nothing had happened and that what she was going through was just a nightmare she kept reliving in her mind. She sensed it right away. She had had so much time with her big sisters that for the job they had was already enough,but Paige had never met Prue in her whole life and she had only lived with them for an year and half,so she must've been feeling distraught. She entered the room without knocking and looked inside and saw the saddest thing she could've ever seen. Paige was still laying in her bed,with the comforter up till her chin and she was holding something in her hands. She walked up to the bed and sat on it. She also saw the tearstains on her sister's face and noticed she was holding a photo they had taken just some weeks before the tragedy,before all this happened. She brushed some hair away from Paige's face,but her little sister didn't say a word,she didn't react at all.

"Honey,why aren't you ready yet?". Once again Paige didn't say a thing.

"Paige,the...the function is in two hours.I'll help you get ready if you want"

"I don't wanna go.I d-don't wanna do anything". She tried not to cry and wordlessly sat her up without even a struggle. It took her a little bit,but she managed to get her ready. The house was so silent. She had no idea of where Leo was and Paige had just shut the whole word out of herself. Some men from the funeral parlours gave her an help with the coffin and they got to the church. The girls sat on the first pew close to Victor. The ceremony went by even too quickly for Phoebe's taste,as if she could've easily forgotten her sister and ended as quickly. She looked to her right and tried to figure Paige's face out and she saw several things in it. She saw pain,anguish,tears and a sort of sense of betrayal. Her baby sister wasn't so different from her older sister after all. Piper had betrayed her. She had promised her that she wouldn't have ever left and the worst thing was that she hadn't just made an empty promise,a promise made with words;she had promised with her actions,even being suffocating with them sometimes. Paige had put all her trust in her,them. Her father,instead,raised himself up and left without a word and she didn't try to follow him. She could've only imagined what it was like to lose two daughters in the span of an year. She didn't know how she was gonna get through this,but she sure as hell didn't want to give up,they still had their life to live.

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