Suffocation

A new school, a new place; new faces and new experiences. Everything was new in the eyes of Fate Testarossa, a transfree. The school was big and was an all-girl school. She was new to this school, to this place. She just moved in a week ago and then transferred a week later in the middle of the semester.

In her class, she was the only one who was alone. Everyone already had their own groups, she was not fitted to any of them; it was suffocating. She could hear their laughs and gossips; she just looked up the sky and prayed for the day to end immediately but the Gods above were not in her favor. Time just kept on moving slower for her. One by one their subjects ended until lunch time came. Groups of students stood up to go to the cafeteria while the others stayed for they have brought lunch on their own.; Fate envied them. They can easily talk to each other; they could share their stories without hesitation, unlike her who was too shy; it's so suffocating. This loneliness that is overtaking her, it was suffocating her as well. Fate was in her train of thoughts until a sweet voice called out for her name. She raised her head up just to see a beautiful angel. Blue eyes like the ocean, copper hair and that smile of hers; it's making her suffocate.

"Hello there! Fate right? Nanoha Takamachi here." She smiled and shook hands with Fate. She looks like someone who can adapt easily, unlike Fate who was bottling all her feelings up. "Have you explored the school? If you didn't I can guide you." She beamed a smile to Fate. That smile, her smile was suffocating her, it was breathtaking. “You know, I have been interested in you for a while.”

"I-I haven't..... explored the school yet. You are interested to me?" Fate said while stuttering.

"Then, I will give you a tour! You'll enjoy this school for sure." Fate nodded. “Well of course yeah! You are beautiful. Come on, I’ll show you around.” She has accepted Nanoha's invitation. Nanoha guided Fate through the school and gave her details in every place. She also told her the 7 mysteries of the school and the teachers in the school. Fate never had met a person like this or talked to someone like Nanoha for she didn’t have friends in her former school, just some acquaintances. Fate would describe her as an energetic, lovable, cute child; unlike her who has no traits like that, she envied her. It's really suffocating. After the guide, Nanoha and Fate still had some time for lunch so they went to the canteen. They bought their foods and drink and sat in a free area. While eating, Nanoha told her stories to Fate while Fate listened to her every word carefully. Fate was enjoying her conversation with Nanoha though only Nanoha is doing the talking, but still she was happy. The bell immediately rang telling them that class will start. Nanoha and Fate went to their classroom and continued with their class.

After lunch the subject is Math, Fate chose not to listen because the numbers were making her dizzy, instead she locked her eyes onto Nanoha. Nanoha was scribbling her notes on her notebook, like the other students. 'She's so beautiful, she is making me suffocate.' Fate thought while looking at Nanoha who was at the front row while Fate was at the back beside the window. Fates never left her gaze to Nanoha till the end of the subject or till the end of the school.

After fixing her bag; Nanoha once again approached Fate.

"Hey, let's go home together, Fate-chan!" By the moment Fate heard her first name being called she blushed like her crimson eyes. “Sorry, it would be really weird for someone to call the first name of someone they just met. I'm really sorry for making you uncomfortable." Nanoha frowned. Truth is, Fate did like it, being called by her first name.

"No, it's okay. You can call me anything you want." Fate looked down to hide her blush.

"Really?! I'm so happy! Then you could also call me Nanoha okay? We are friends after all." Friends, Fate never had them, she just had acquaintances. She was overjoyed when someone called her a friend. She looked at Nanoha with a smile and nodded. Their conversation continued as they walk through the side walk. The two girls took some detours in the mall, arcades and in some cafe. Fate now wished that this would never end, but again, the Gods above were not in her favor. Her time spent with Nanoha flew by like a wind.

Sooner or later, the two of them exchanged numbers and mails and contacted each other almost every minute. They began hanging out in weekend in malls. Fate was happy but at the same time she was suffocating. The more she spends time with Nanoha, the more she was suffocating; drowning from her kindness. They went to school together and went home together. They exchanged scores of their test paper and taught each other in their weakest subject. Later on, Fate was promoted into being Nanoha's bestfiriend. They did everything together, just like siblings do. They fooled around, played together and even took a bath together. They even had sleep over in their places, if that so, they would sleep in the same bed with their hands intertwined. Fate was having the time of her life, the more she spends time with Nanoha; her suffocation was being depleted little by little. The inner her, who was strangling her heart was getting beaten by Nanoha's kindness. She was happy that she met Nanoha; she thanked the Gods for letting Nanoha into her life. Just by being with Nanoha, just by talking to her it makes her whole day complete.

As their friendship deepens, Nanoha became more clingy. She always hug Fate's arm and anyone who sees them would think of them as a couple, but reality is, they were not, they were just super-mega bestfriends. They also hold hands when walking home. Sometimes Fate would even give Nanoha a piggy-back ride if Nanoha demands too. Nanoha would always hug Fate or kiss her on the cheek if she had a chance, well Fate has many gaps. Nanoha would even tease her and trick her just to get a glimpse of Fate's blushing face; she is the white devil after all.

Weeks became months. It was just about months ago when Nanoha and Fate met, obviously they were bestfriends now. Fate opened up to Nanoha and told everything about herself like her favorite color, animal, etc. Fate was happy, she was in heaven. She feels like she is in her paradise whenever she is with Nanoha. Nanoha made her smile and brought her happiness, but there is another thing that Nanoha brought to Fate is a feeling that is foreign to Fate. Fate never felt like this; when Nanoha is near, butterflies invade her stomach and her heart races so fast when Nanoha gets clingy. Fate was getting scared with this feeling but in the end she just shrugged it off.

It was just another day in school; Nanoha was talking to the other students and not to Fate. Seeing Nanoha talk with others, made Fate's heart sink. Her inner self was back in business again. Fate’s inner self strangled her heart making her suffocate. Seeing Nanoha hold hands with others, that is unacceptable for Fate. The inner she kept on strangling her heart, telling her that Nanoha does not like her anymore; she was alone again. An unknown feeling was dwelling inside her heart, it was hurting so bad. Without Nanoha, she is just a loner; it was suffocating. Fate's mind was filled with questions about Nanoha's action and these feelings of hers. Nanoha's neglecting to Fate continued, days then weeks. This really saddened Fate. Once again, inner-Fate started strangling Fate, making her heart break as well as making her suffocate. Every minutes that has passed, every time she does not talk or touch Nanoha, it was suffocating. It’s like, without Nanoha, Fate’s life was meaningless.

She cried in her sleep thinking about Nanoha and her unknown feelings. She could not take this feeling anymore, so she consulted one of her acquaintances named Hayate Yagami, who calls herself a love expert. The two met up in a nearby cafe and their consolation began.

"It's been so long Fate! I never thought that you would chat me first. So what is your problem my dear friend?" Fate looked at the ground to hide her blushing face. "Fate, how many times should I tell you that we are friends not acquaintances? I truly see you as a friend so don't worry." Hayate beamed a smile to Fate.

"Ummm.. Hayate-chan, I met this girl in school and she is really beautiful and energetic. Just recently she only interacts with me only for a while then she leaves me again. Whenever I see her talk to others and hold their hands, somehow my heart hurts and if she clings to me my heart races. Hayate-chan, does my heart have a disease or bacteria on it?" Fate asked.

Hayate chuckled at her friend’s question. She was naïve inlove indeed. She knows what to do and what is happening between Fate and this girl. "Leave everything to cupid! I, Hayate Yagami, know the answers to your worries Fate; for I am the love expert! Fate, what you are feeling in your heart is so simple yet so complicated. It is called love. In love, of course jealousy is there. Means that you are so in love with that girl and you are so gay for her. She even made you jealous just like that!"

"So, I am really inlove with her? "

"If there was a point where you think about perverted fantasies about her then yeah, you are so gay for her." Fate blushed after Hayate's remark. Hayate grinned, she has successfully found Fates weakness; she could finally tease her non-stop. "Ara, so I am right about you thinking of perverted things about her. I didn't know you didn't know you have that side of yours!"

"N-no! I don't think of Nanoha like that and I don't want to ruin our friendship just because of this thing called love."

"You don't want to be promoted from super-mega besfriend to girlfirend?"

"But, what if Nanoha does not feel the same way? What if she does really ignore me and never talks to me again?"

"Fate, I'm sure that she has the reason why she is neglecting you. If she is neglecting you because of her feelings for you then you are lucky. You should give it a try, plan out a confession to her and make it spectacular. If she says no then accept it and move on, if you are not able to move on by yourself, I am here for you." Hayate winked at Fate. "I still have to help Signum and the others in the restaurant, drop by if you made any progress"

"I will. Thanks, Hayate."

After their conversation, Fate thought about it so hard. Will she confess or will she keep on hiding her feelings for Nanoha. If Nanoha feels the same as Fate then their feeling are mutual, means Fate has a chance with Nanoha. They just met a few months ago, they are bestfriends, most of all, and both of them are girls. Fate didn't want to ruin their friendship; she didn't want her friend, and the girl she loves to hate her. To avoid that, she bottled up her feelings and didn't them out. Not being able to say 'I love you' to the person you love and cherish the most, it was really suffocating for Fate.

After Hayate's consolation to Fate, she decided to go offensive. Instead of always relying on Nanoha, this time she decided to talk to Nanoha. Lunch break it was when Fate decided to talk to Nanoha. She went to Nanoha's desk and looked at her. Fate said hi but Nanoha bowed her head down avoiding eye contact with her.

"Nanoha, if you really hate me that much then, you could have just told me."

"No! It's a misunderstanding! Fate-chan, you don't understand mou~ M-meet me at the rooftop later, after school." Nanoha stood up and immediately and left Fate. Fate's heart pained. 'Maybe she really does hate me.' She thought. Her heart pained, it felt like she was stabbed through heart. She can't breathe. Nanoha's words is drowning her, is suffocating her. After lunch, classes continued; as class goes by Fate was worried about Nanoha's action a while ago. She thought hard about it and didn't find a reason to make Nanoha ignore her like that. Questions flooded her head; does Nanoha hates her? Does she see Fate as an annoyance? These kinds of questions flooded in her head.

She was worried, her heart and mind was filled with anxiety and insecurities. She can't stop thinking about Nanoha and herself. She didn't want their friendship to be ruined by something normal thing like this. She was scared of losing Nanoha, she was afraid of ruining their friendship. Time flew by fast, not what Fate has expected; it was already dismissal time. When she looked at Nanoha's seat it was empty already, means that she already went to the rooftop waiting for her. Sadly, Nanoha has to wait longer for Fate for she is in cleaning duty. One by one her classmates left leaving her and the others who are in duty. They cleaned the classroom fast and Fate immediately took her bag and dash off to the rooftop. Every step she makes every sound her shoes make, it was making her heart quiver and her hands shake. Finally, after numerous hallways and stairs, she finally reached her destination. She took a deep breath before opening the door of the rooftop. When she opened it, her heart skipped a beat. She saw a copper-haired girl with the sun setting as the background, it was beautiful, and she was beautiful. Fate went inside the rooftop and closed the door behind her. This is the moment of truth. Fate was still shaking, the closer she gets to Nanoha, the more anxious she gets. In the mangas that she read, whenever a girl calls you at the rooftop after school, expect a confession of love, but this is entirely impossible, that is what Fate thinks. Nanoha turned around and faced Fate. Fate saw a hint of blush on Nanoha's face.

"Fate-chan! I'm sorry for neglecting you these past few days, it's because I uh-" Nanoha started with an outburst. “Do you remember when I told you I was interested in you? I was only interested on being your friend at that time but as we spend more time with each other I started having feelings for you and..” Fate never saw Nanoha nervous like this. "I- I was having this kind of feeling and when I found out what it is, I felt disgusted to myself, for seeing my bestfriend like that so if I could only minimize that feeling then I will not be guilty."

"Nanoha, what do you mean by that?"

"Mou~ Fate-chan! You are really an idiot! I-I *murmurs*"

"Nanoha, if you don't make your words clear I won't understand you. Just spit it out already, just go and say your reason-" before Fate could even finish her sentence, a soft punch landed on her lips. Nanoha has used her lips to punch Fate's lips. Fate was surprised with this, she never expected that this was a love confession like in the manga that she reads. Their kiss was sweet and gentle, but it lasted just a minute. This action made Fate flustered. "N-N-Nanoha! Wha-what was that for?! Why did you kiss me?"

"You still don't understand? I LOVE YOU, YOU IDIOT! Do I really have to say it out loud?

Disgusting right? Falling in love with my bestfriend and it's a girl! I'm wicked. Go ahead and make fun of m-" This time Nanoha was interrupted by Fate's lips, obviously she was also surprised, she didn't expect this either. Their second kiss was born, and like the first one, it just lasted a minute.

"Y-you took my first kiss then, I should also take yours... your lips are virgin right?"

"Mou~ Fate-chan. does that mean that we are..."

"I love you too Nanoha!" Fate tackled Nanoha with a hug and Nanoha hugged her back. "I thought that you hated me." Fate said, still not letting go of Nanoha.

"I would never hate you; I hate myself for falling in love with you. It's your fault why I fell for you in the first place. You are beautiful, smart, athletic and so cute! You are perfect, you are a goddess." Nanoha cupped Fate's cheek. "You are so perfect. I really envy you for your beauty you know."

"Well, I am perfect alright. If I am the goddess then you are my angel. You are my sun, the light that guided me and led me out of the darkness. You are my hope and everything. You made me smile and gave me happiness. You are really an interesting person."

"Fate-chan, you are interesting yourself. You know that I am not the only who likes you right? I mean, you always receive letters in your shoe locker."

"Really? Well yeah I do receive letters, love letters to be exact but I turned them down."

"I never knew that you were this dense. Yeah you were popular because of your brain and beauty."

"I may have received numerous love letters but I turned them all down because one girl has already captured my heart and that was you Nanoha”

"I like the bold Fate so much! But the shy Fate is so cute too! Both versions are so great. There is also the romantic Fate. Hey, Fate-chan, are you a S or M? Wah, Fate-chan is just so cute in every angle. *fangirling intensifies*" Nanoha's fangirling rants about Fate continued. Fate was happy; she didn't need to worry in the first place. Today, Fate is now promoted from being Nanoha's bestfriend to Girlfriend.

After their confessions at the rooftop, the two girls had a date in a cafe but just for a little while. They held hands as they walk by the sidewalk. It was the best day of Fate's life.

Those days when she was suffocating, it was now relieved my Nanoha. To think that one girl managed to overcome Fate's inner her and destroyed her completely. It was suffocating for Fate for being alone and the loneliness that dwells inside her until Nanoha showed up to took away her suffocation. Fate was happy, Nanoha was happy, everyone was happy for them; and this is where the story ends.