Renjun flinches at Jaemin's slightest touch.
His rake-like arms shield his head.
He knows it's useless, yet he does it still.
The light in Jaemin's eyes dimmed.
Renjun isn't over the trauma yet.
Jaemin's hand opens to reveal Renjun's fallen drawing pencil.
The HB with Moomin all over.
A slightly blunt pencil,
because he didn't like it too sharp.
"It's all about the soft edges,"
Renjun told Jaemin, as they enjoyed the sounds of the leaves rustling while Jaemin laid on the plentiful fields and Renjun drew the landscape.
The clear pencil cap is still there.
Still in pristine condition.
Just as how Jaemin gave it to him for his 9th birthday.
Renjun was always clumsy,
so Jaemin wanted to help him
keep his pencils in the correct state
so Renjun wouldn't need to bring
the huge sharpener
everywhere he went.
"Injun, you pencil. You dropped it,"
The older opens his eyes slowly, to see his favourite pencil being held by someone he feared most was strange.
He mumbled a thank you. His eyes dare not look at the younger. His delicate fingers touched the boy's hand cautiously.
And he ran off to his favourite place in school, the school garden.
He finds his special corner.
His breathing is quick and small.
He curls up into a pitiful ball.
His thoughts race.
His head hurts.
The strange release of adrenaline causes his limbs to tremble.
He bites his lip and tries to rock himself to control.
He really hates how he was always consumed by panic attacks whenever Jaemin talks to him.
He hates how Renjun now crumbles in anxiety.
He hates that look of fear whenever he looks over to him.
He knows that it's all his fault.
slowly creeps up from behind.