Get Free Copy

100 free copies left

This novel is limited to 100 free copies due to its part in Inkitt’s Novel Contest.

0
Free copy left
You can read our best books
RedRustlingLeaves would love your feedback! Got a few minutes to write a review?
Write a Review

Holding On

By RedRustlingLeaves

Drama

Chapter 1

     Sirius Black woke up with a start and held his breath as he –supposedly- locked gazes with the Dementor that was currently holding the bars of his cell with its scabbed hands and inspecting him, every bit of warmth and hope sucked away by its mere presence. Not that Sirius had any more positive feelings left- what kept him going was the thought of his innocence, the fact that he knew he was not at fault for the reasons he had been thrown in the desperation of Azkaban.

  Though there were times when he would sit (because, really, that was all he could pretty much do) and think of whether he was actually to be blamed for James and Lily’s death. He was having such a moment right now. The Dementor had ‘kindly’ woken him up from the nightmare he was having, but honestly, Sirius couldn’t say that he woke up to reality. No, it was just another nightmare, but one that didn’t make him stare continuously at the bodies of the most important people in his life. Indirectly, he had caused their deaths and this weighted heavily on his soul.

  It was his fault too, but he was still innocent.

  He was innocent.

  He was.

  He had to keep telling himself that.

  No muscle on the Animagus wizard’s face so much as twitched as he stared at the void behind the hooded figure of the Dementor. He knew very well that behind that ghostly material was its horrendous mouth. There was someone’s kiss Sirius yearned for, but it wasn’t the one the Dementors seemed so keen on giving to every resident of the isolated prison. Sirius suppressed a shudder as he recalled just how many times he had been close to receiving it and the futile gasps or pleas of those who were more unfortunate. The fact that, while in Azkaban, you could still get more unfortunate was a bit ironic.

  ‘Go away’, he mentally urged the Dark creature. ’There is nothing for you to drain here.

  The Dementor slowly released the bars and after a few more awfully long seconds, the entity glided away. If Sirius had been in a good mood, he would have thought that the creature had almost appeared to be sulking as it left. Only that he wasn’t. He hadn’t been in a long time. His hands trembled as he fisted them in his knotted hair, bits and fragments of his recent dream resurfacing.

   James’s empty gaze and overall bloody figure was deeply imbedded into his mind. He was no longer Prongs, the fearless Gryffindor who would come up with the craziest prank ideas, guide the Marauders into nocturnal adventures and follow Lily with such stubbornness that the whole school was making bets on whether he would give up or not eventually. As he laid there, his limbs cold and twisted at unnatural angles, partly crushed by whatever pieces of the house had fallen over him, James Potter was no longer a friend, a brother, a leader, a Marauder, a husband, a father…

  Because he was gone. What had made him be all those things was …

  Remus had always joked saying that James’s pair of glasses was a symbol of his status. It was nonetheless something the rest of the Marauders would associate their friend with. Now they were broken and nearly unrecognizable.

  …gone.

  Sirius felt as though a part of him died upon seeing his friend, but he became sure of it when he saw Lily. He had never known why seeing the latter had been all the more difficult- maybe it was because even after having left this world, she still tried to protect the most important thing for her and James, her body angled towards it, yet eyes devoid of any spark of life.

  The prisoner tensed upon hearing the ‘dinner bell’- a faint sound resembling the squeak of a dying frog, though he would often replace the word ‘frog’ with ‘rat’ in his mind. The familiar, rusty bowl of moldy bread appeared at his foot and he determinedly kicked it away, bending to take a sip from the can of stale water, unconsciously ignoring the little insects squirming in it. His eyes narrowed at the thought of rats, or more specifically, a certain rat and old hatred flared up, making his throat constrict painfully.

  Azkaban taught you how to wish for less, if nothing at all, but the things you missed would just get more numerous as time passed. Sirius had come to realize that over the years. He missed the friends that were his family, the smell and taste of homemade food, the way the smell of the forest would cling to his skin after a midnight run, warm baths, a good, carefree laugh and pretty much everything related to his past life. Azbakan brought up all the things you used to have and made them parade in front of you daily, so that you would cherish them, but at the same time know that you could never get them back, because you were stuck there, amongst damp darkness with only Dementors for company- and that said it all.

  He missed her. Her hair. Her snide remarks. The way she would roll her eyes exasperated, but then would laugh at something he said.

  Sirius counted her as part of the little light that kept him going, along with the image that always reminded him why he had to hold on, the little light that he hid behind an obsessive way of thinking, in order for it not to be taken away. He always thought of it when he felt like sticking his dried mouth through the bars, for the Dementor to give him the kiss. As he had made his way through what used to be his friend’s home, towards the lifeless body of Lily, he saw what she and James had aimed to protect at the price of their own lives.

   Harry.

  Sirius leaned against the cold wall behind him and closed his eyes.

  31st of July 1991. A magical year for some, including the one he was a godfather for- a duty he was not to forget for the rest of his life.

  ‘Happy Birthday, Harry’, he mouthed the words. 

 


Write a Review Did you enjoy my story? Please let me know what you think by leaving a review! Thanks, RedRustlingLeaves
Continue Reading
Further Recommendations

brettylee: The narrative is slick yet punchy. Life, Family and Friends I believe is the core message so it’s easy to relate to. It’s surprisingly action packed. The author does a good job at keeping you guessing. Just when you think all is right, whack, the unexpected happens. The dialogue is energetic and ...

ernbelle: When I first started this story I was a little unsettled by all of the information that appears in the prologue, and wasn't sure if I would continue. However, I am very glad I did. The plot was very well thought out and really interesting. There were not any page breaks or markers to acknowledge ...

Sandra Estrada: I loved every minute of it and I thank my lucky stars that brought me to the story, it's been a whirlwind of emotions, plot twist after plot twist but I never got tired of them. Abby and Kade's story is a hard one to understand but once you're submerged in their story and love, you can't help but...

PaulSenkel: If you like Arthur C. Clarke's Odyssey, especially The Final Odyssey, then you will probably also enjoy this book. I definitely did.It does, however, address a more adolescent public than the above-mentioned book.I enjoyed the story and finished it in a few days. The overall situation on earth an...

christylynnr5: This was such an amazing story!!! It showed newly found friendship slowly developed into love. The story never got boring and always had drama happening to keep you reading. I would defiantly recommend this to anyone who loves a good love story!

romboili000: As I read this book it made me realize the importance of trusting big God. And believing that you can love even when it feels impossible. This story definitely has made me what to become a better person in Christ and just life. So thank you that's all I have to say because you wrote this story so...

annie08c: I really like this story, I can relate to it a lot and with how she feels, the boyfriend and the events that happened but I'm a little bit younger. It was really good plot, really liked how you stuck to the topic and you had a new title for every chapter making me guess what's going to happen. Ma...

Alkira Joan: Great story, I found it hard to read especially the dialogue. You just need to fix up some spelling errors and the gramma .I enjoyed this book. was a little hard to get though.,.,..,.,.,,..,.,.,, , , , ,.,, , , , , , , ,., , ,.,,,,,

Bernsigns: This is an age old story, but with excellent plot twists that I didn't see coming. I truly liked how the story slowly, but steadily revealed the secrets. There were secrets I didn't expect, which kept me wanting to read. I always love a happy ending, with a little bit of real life mixed in. Th...

More Recommendations

christylynnr5: This was a really good book. I couldn't stop reading it. I loved how the story had its ups and downs and it kept you on the edge of your seat. But the only thing I had a problem with was the grammar errors. I know everyone makes mistakes but this one had more than just a few. and in some places I...

Grapes Are Juicy yes!!!: I give this novel FIVE STARS ! This novel is worth reading from the beginning to the end! The plot and conflicts in this story are very smartly integrated. The language facility is a little odd , but i guess this was done on purpose, given the novel's set era. Other than that, this should definit...

LouiseJ2: I enjoyed the detail you went into with regards to the case. It made the UNSUB appear believable. The crisis in the middle of the story was my favorite part, very dramatic but not over the top. I feel like sometimes pairings can be overdone but I liked that some of the relationships were a little...

Dessie Williams: I read the first book and now this one, they both are really good stories. love the characters,. loved painting the story in my head, the ending was awesome. Hope the series continue . Great job .... You Rock!!!