Never Better: 1
“Seungmin! Get down here right now!” Seungmin rolled his eyes, his head banging against his bedroom wall.
He forced himself up off of his dingy carpet, pulling his earbuds from his ears and throwing his phone onto his bed. He groaned as he made his way down the long staircase in his house. He hated that staircase.
It was a pain on his skinny legs to walk up and a pain on said skinny legs to bounce down. He peaked his head around the bannister, grimacing at the sight.
In anyone else’s eyes, everything would seem normal. Just a man sitting on the couch watching T.V. with his younger brother, but in Seungmin’s eyes, on that couch sat a monster.
Lee Taeyong, the bane of his existence and the bringer of perpetual nightmares.
Taeyong technically wasn’t his brother, it was his father’s wife’s son. After both of them passed away in a building fire, they were both put under his care.
Taeyong had always been a terrible person to Seungmin. He was mean and selfish and manipulative of his sweet, stuttering baby brother, Jaemin.
To everyone else though, he was a lovely, caring, sophisticated older brother that took care of his siblings well. If only people knew.
“Seungmin! Why haven’t you made dinner yet? Get to it, bum!” Seungmin sighed heavily, but made his way to the kitchen anyhow.
He knew better than to disobey Taeyong. The bruises on his neck, cuts on his arm, and his still healing ankle remind him everyday. He hates making excuses for them, so he doesn’t give Taeyong the chance to make them.
He trudged into his kitchen, making sure to keep an eye on Jaemin through the diner style window in the wall.
Taeyong had always been too close to Jaemin. Even when they’d first met, he seemed to like him too much. Seungmin frequently asked Jaemin if Taeyong had tried anything on him, getting the same ‘no’ and shy smile each time.
Seungmin even went so far as to sleeping in Jaemin’s bed with him at night to make sure he was safe. He didn’t trust him around Taeyong. He didn’t trust Taeyong at all.
As he prepared at pot to make some ramen, he heard the loud crash of a vase hitting the ground. He rushed into the next room, abandoning the noodles in the cold water.
The scene in the room was one he’d seen often. Taeyong towering over Jaemin with a weapon in his hand, this time, a shard from the glass vase that sat lonely with dead flowers in the corner on a small coffee table.
Jaemin was curled up in a ball, shaking and crying on the ground. Seungmin knew that Taeyong wouldn’t hit him - he never hit him. He wouldn’t dare. He stared down at him with a cynical smile, one that made Seungmin’s stomach turn violently.
Taeyong had finally caught sight of him, thankfully leaving his shaken little brother on the ground to sob.
“And what do you think you’re doing, you pathetic fuck?” He pointed the glass at him like it was nothing, waving it around carelessly.
“Did you hurt him?” Seungmin knew the answer, but he had to make sure.
“Him? I didn’t touch the little flower. He’s such a little bitch. All I did was break a vase and he fell to the ground crying.” Seungmin huffed, attempting to push past the older man to aid his brother.
He was caught, however, by Taeyong. He was suddenly pushed against the wall, the pictures hanging there swinging as if they we’re going to fall. He could feel the coldness of the sharp glass pressing against his Adam’s apple, slowly but surely cutting into his skin.
“Where do you think you’re going? You go back into that kitchen and make my food. It’s all you’re good for.” Seungmin looked up at him, venom clear in his stare.
He pushed his Taeyong off of him and trudged back to the kitchen, disregarding the wound on his neck entirely. He peered into the other room to see how Jaemin was handling things, but he wasn’t there. It left an uncomfortable tinge in Seungmin’s stomach.
As he prepared they’re food, he contemplated the same thing he always did when preparing there food.
“Should I just poison the fucker and get it over with?”
It was something he thought about diligently, and was seriously considering... Until he took his brother into account.
It would be easy to poison the food with some of his meds, but that was just the problem. Taeyong always forced Jaemin to eat first. Some sick fascination he had with watching him eat. He couldn’t put anything in the food without hurting Jaemin.
He thought about spiking his drink, but Taeyong never let him get it for him, nor did he leave the table while he ate. It’s like he knew that Seungmin wanted him dead.
Dinner was incredibly silent, as it usually was.
Jaemin ate with with a reddened, tear streaked face. He hated loud noises, he feared them. Taeyong knew this full well. He would never hurt the boy, but he would torture him with every second he was alive.
Seungmin could recall a time a little while ago, when his parents were still alive. He was only 14, Jaemin was only 10, and Taeyong was 18.
Jaemin had woken up in the middle of the night needing to use the bathroom. He’d always used the bathroom more than what his parents thought was normal. They never took him to a doctor, they’d just assumed that he drank too much water.
He’d snuck quietly out of his room and down the stairs. He preferred going to the downstairs bathroom because it was warmer down there.
Seungmin had woken up a little while after Jaemin had left. He went to the kitchen to grab a glass of water. He didn’t turn the light on when he went downstairs in the middle of the night - he felt like it was a waste of power and a pain to his eyes.
So it was no surprise that he didn’t see who was lurking in the darkness.
Seungmin heard the bathroom door open, and then he heard two loud shrieks.
He ran to the bathroom to see what was happening, almost choking on his water in the process. He almost screamed himself at the sight.
Taeyong was laughing hysterically at his little brother, who himself was writhing on the ground in pain. He held the back of his head, squeezing his thighs together in what Seungmin first assumed was pain.
“H-he fucking pissed himself!” Seungmin took a second look at his little brother and the floor getting increasingly wet under him. Suddenly, his thigh clenching made much more sense.
His parents punished Jaemin for pissing himself at ‘such an old age’ because they found the thought of Taeyong harassing him in the middle of the night was ridiculous.
Since that night, Taeyong has used Jaemin’s sound sensitivity against him at every chance he could get - breaking things on purpose, screaming in his face whether he was angry or not, hiding behind corners to scare him - his tyranny never ended.
Jaemin finished his food faster than both Taeyong and Seungmin, but Taeyong forced him to stay at the table.
“Hey, why’s it so quiet in here? Minnie, tell me about your day at school.” Taeyong spoke as if nothing had happened prior to them eating.
Jaemin’s lips straightened into a straight line before he began to speak.
“N-nothing much happened t-t-today. We f-finally played d-dodgeball in g-gym today, though.” Seungmin knew that Jaemin didn’t like speaking because of his stutter, but Seungmin found it comforting in a way.
The rest of the dinner was silent, as usual. Taeyong never cared enough to ask Seungmin how his day was, even if it were sarcastically.
If so, he would’ve told him that he’d made another A on his English test, another C on his History test, and another F on his Math test. If so, he would’ve told him that he’d been bullied by Lee Minho again, having his face shoved into a locker and harassed, as usual.
He didn’t care that Taeyong didn’t care. The less talk between them, the better. It was much less likely for a fight to break out.
As soon as they finished their dinner, Seungmin got up to swoop the dishes off of the table. He usually didn’t wash, but he figured that Jaemin should sleep, if only for a while.
He quickly washed the dishes, tiny soap bubbles floating up and popping in his face.
“Make sure you wash them good, I’m going to sleep. If I come back down here and those dishes are still dirty-“
“I know, I know. You’ll kill me, I get it. They’ll be clean. Just go to bed.” He heard Taeyong scoff before hearing his loud footsteps going up the stairs.
He let out a small sigh before feeling a small tap on his shoulder. He turned to see a shy looking Jaemin reaching for the dishes. He quickly pulled the dish he was washing away from him.
“No Jae, go to bed.”
“But I-I want t-to help-“
“Bed. Now. I’ll be up in a minute, i’m just washing spoons and stuff.” He heard a small puff before hearing a tiny ‘okay’. Soft footsteps up the stairs ever so slightly calmed his nerves.
He washed the remaining dishes quickly, turning off all of the lights downstairs.
He stared down at the glass mess made from the vase on the floor of their living room. He didn’t clean it. Jaemin still knew it was there. He hoped that Taeyong stepped on it in the morning. He turned of the lights in the living room before speeding upstairs.
Him and Jaemin didn’t share a room, but they were so close together that they might as well have. Their beds were in the same place in there rooms and with the thin walls, it made it easy for them to talk through them.
They’d been doing it since kids, when neither of them could sleep at all. Sometimes, they’d do it just to mess with each other, but it was almost ritualistic at this point.
Seungmin entered his room and quickly shut the door, receiving loud protest from Taeyong across the hall. He let out a sigh of relief. He felt safe in his messy room. There were clothes all over the place, but it made him feel comfortable.
He took off his shirt and threw it to the ground, replacing it with another one in his desk chair. He turned his light off and flopped onto his bed, pulling his cracked iPhone from his front pocket.
He turned it on, a smile immediately making it’s way onto his face. His lock screen was one of him and his best friend, Hongjoong, in the ninth grade. They were both on the school’s volleyball team.
In the picture, they were posing with the rest of the members on the team, but they were kneeling on the ground holding the championship trophy.
He unlocked his phone, seeing the multiple unread text messages by said boy.
joongie: seung?
joongie: seungmin???
joongie: seungmin, are you there?
joongie: did you do your homework? I have the answers for you if not
joongie: did you eat today? do you need me to buy you anything?
joongie: answer me seungie 😥😥
Seungmin rolled his eyes, a small smile making it’s way to his face. Hongjoong was always such a mom when it came to him.
Seungmin: i’m here, i didn’t do my homework, i’ve eaten, and you don’t need to buy me anything unless you really want to
joongie: …
joongie: literally the only thing i’m buying you is a kick in the ass
Seungmin: lmao what
joongie: why didn’t you answer me? i’ve been texting you all damn day
Seungmin: i didn’t see the messages
joongie: 🙄🙄 whatever.. are you doing okay?
Seungmin: idk what you define as okay
joongie: seung don’t be a smartass
Seungmin: fine, fine
joongie: are you okay?
Seungmin: yea, i’m okay. Promise
joongie: did you take your meds?
Seungmin: what for?
joongie: so you don’t fuck around and do something stupid?? what else would they be for-
Seungmin: no, i didn’t take them
joongie: whyyyy tf not?
Seungmin: bc i don’t want to?
joongie: ugh fine, just don’t hurt yourself, okay?
Seungmin: fine whatever
joongie: you should sleep soon, it’s 11:00 already
Seungmin: but i’m not tired
joongie: stop arguing and go to sleep
Seungmin: but-
joongie: n o w
Seungmin: ugh fine
joongie: thank you 😋
Seungmin: whatever
joongie: …
joongie: i love you, seung
Seungmin: love you too, joongie
Seungmin turned off his phone, placing it under his pillow. At first, he thought that Hongjoong telling him that he loved him every night before they went to sleep was weird, but he loves it.
As if on cue, a coordinated three knocks was heard through his wall. It was Jaemin saying ‘I love you’ before bed. Seungmin smiled, returning the three knocks.
