Jungkook was afraid. Afraid to go past the entrance of the library. Afraid to push past the doors, only to be met with a certain red-head he most certainly didn’t want to see now, not today.
It took him a day and a half, and a moment of daydreaming on the couch at his dorm room, to realize his mistake. It slipped his mind, but, how complicated things were thought to have become now.
Jungkook didn’t have the courage anymore. He did not know how he’d be able to face Taehyung after he accidentally gave away his identity in his last note.
He was pretty sure by now that the librarian was crept out by him, and wouldn’t even wanna see Jungkook’s face.
Why did he have to ruin this for himself? Jungkook continued blaming his mindlessness. He felt stupid, if not disappointed.
Jimin, on the other hand, completely understood the reasoning behind his friend’s misery. He understood how Jungkook realized that all his chances to win Taehyung’s heart had gone down the drain.
Jungkook even stopped sending the notes to the librarian, fearful he might worsen the situation. It’s been 3 weeks since the last revealing note was sent, and, Jungkook touched no other piece of blue paper since.
Jimin wanted to help the younger, but he didn’t know how. Considering how misrable Jungkook felt, Jimin knew that his usual jokes and sunshine won’t help.
So, at one quiet lunch, Jimin began, “So, you stopped sending those notes?”
Jungkook looked up from his fruit salad, smiling sadly, and saying, “Yeah, I did.”
“Why?” Jimin asked. “Writing those notes made you happy, Jeon. You always felt so bubbly and giddy after writing one. Why did you stop now? Even Taehyung liked them.”
Jungkook sighed, looking up at Jimin, ready to say it for the nth time. “I know, hyung. Those notes meant a lot to me. Maybe, Taehyung enjoyed them. But, now, he knows it’s me sending those notes.”
Jimin stared at Jungkook, in exasperation, “So? Does it even matter? He probably overlooked your slip.”
Jungkook shook his head, “It’s pointless, hyung. I think it’s time I left my- I mean, the librarian alone. I’ve bothered him enough.”
Jimin frowned, his heart breaking at his friend’s sadness, “What if he never noticed how you exposed yourself? In that case, you could spare him a last note, Guk. Explaining why you couldn’t send notes anymore after that.”
Jungkookie just nodded, munching on a fry before mumbling, “I’ll think about it.”
Taehyung sighed, disappointment crawling up at the back of his mind, as he thought of the last note he received.
It seemed as though his admirer, in their happiness, accidentally gave away a crucial clue to their identity.
Taehyung wasn’t dumb. A few seconds of sinking that clue in, and Taehyung knew that it was Jungkook who was sending him those notes.
Now, Taehyung could find a reasoning behind the younger’s flustered self around him.
He thought that once he would see the younger, he would try to clear out all the misunderstandings and hesitations, because, Taehyung could somehow feel that after realizing what mistake he made, Jungkook would be more hesitant than ever.
But, to his disappointment, Jungkook never came to the library. And, worst of all, the notes stopped coming.
Taehyung missed them, and he was hopeful that one day in between this week, he’d be able to sort this whole thing out with Jungkook.