Love and Loss

Nightmares

I woke up with the sun still blaring in through my window. Why the hell was I awake in the middle on the night? I rolled over and looked at my clock. 5 AM morio time. Just great. I rolled back down onto my back and looked up at the ceiling. What was I going to do about my father? What was I going to do about Dimitri?

I decided to think a little more on the topic of my father. Why had he lied to everyone about what element he specialized in? Why can't spirit users heal other spirit users? How much time does he really have left? I tried to think of other ways to heal him but came up with nothing, and we didn't have much time I started to think about what was making him so sick. Yeah he had been in a battle but that wouldn't have caused this kind of reaction. I spent god knows how long thinking about what was doing this to him but came up with nothing.

My thoughts wouldn't leave me alone so I decided to go down to the gym and blow off some steam. I quickly put on a black sports bra with black leggings and a black St. Vladimir's hoodie. Black was after all one of my favorite colors. I made my way to the gym in silence. No one was in the halls, everybody where probably still sleeping. But that's not a surprise seeing at it's five in the morning. But what was surprising was that when I opened the gym doors and waked in I was no longer alone. Their at the right side of the gym was Dimitri punching a punching bag rather angrily. But what frightened me was the look on his face. Dimitri had a murderous look on his face that scared me. I silently watched him for a few minutes before walking towards him. "Dimitri." I call to get his attention, nothing. I walk right beside him and could hear him mumbling words. Some in Russian some in English. I could only understand what he was saying in English so I payed attention to that.

"Must…Kill….All…" I look at his with confusion, but then I remember. Dimitri sometimes would get nightmares. After him being turned strigoi I could hear Lissa though the bond always talking to Christian about how Dimitri would get horrible night mares and that she was worried about him. Apparently she was walking buy his room one night and heard him screaming and yelling. Only to find out he was having a nightmare. I try calling out to him again.

"Dimitri, it's just a nightmare."

"Kill…All…Strigoi…"

"Hey, Dimitri, listen to me!" I put my hands on his shoulders and turn him around to face me, but he hasn't snapped out of it yet and goes to throw another punch, right at my face. I just barley miss the brunt of it, but he still hit the left side of my cheek. I take a step back but then quickly go back to him. I grab his hands and secure them around his back. He struggles against me but I don't let go. "Dimitri, It's Rose. Rose is here. It's okay." I take away one of my hands to touch his check but he jerks away from me. By doing so he takes a step back and pushes me away from him… but too hard. I fall to the ground on my back with a loud thump. "Dimitri!" I yell. For some reason this snaps Dimitri out of his faze and he looks around the gym. Unsure of how he got there. He then looks down at me on the ground with a hand to my now swollen cheek and shock is written all over his face.

"Roza?" I look up and meet his eyes. He bends down to helps me up but I jerk back on instinct. Not that I'm scared at him it's just that after punching me and pushing me down it's my natural instinct. He sees me do this and looks hurt. "Are you okay?" I node my head.

"I'm fine. Are you? You were having a pretty bad nightmare." I stand up on my own with Dimitri watching me.

"Oh, yeah." He pauses then looks back at me. "Thank you, I could hear you voice, trying to calm me. That's what stopped them."

"You're welcome." He slowly, as if he might break me; touches my bruised cheek.

"Roza, who hurt you?" I look down at the floor not wanting to tell him it was him. But before I can come up with some lie to comfort him he jerks his hand back with a gasp.

"I did. Didn't I? That's why you were on the floor and jerked back from me." I look up into his soft brown eyes and can see guilt in them. "Oh Roza, god I'm so sorry. This-this isn't the first time I've hurt you!"

"Hey it wasn't you fault. You're not an abusive guy. I know you didn't mean to hurt me." At this I can see him freeze.

"But I hurt you, more than once."

"They were by mistake. You had no control. You were having a nightmare, you thought I was strigoi. Didn't you?" He slowly nodes his head. "See, I know you would never hurt me on purpose Dimitri. You're not that kind of guy."

"How can you be so forgiving?" I smile.

"It's just the kind of gal I am." He gives me a half smile. After a few moments he speaks up again.

"I wish I never lost you Roza."

"You didn't lose me, I'm right here."

"That's not what I meant and you know it." I look down at the ground then back at him.

"You haven't lost me Dimitri, there's still hope."


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