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Aperitif

By Dan Gee

Scifi / Humor

Pre-Prandial Discourse

River leaned across and smiled at Jayne as he polished a currently dissected piece of his armory. “I can smell cooked goose,” she said solemnly before returning her attentions to the ball of wool that she had spent the afternoon unwinding and rewinding. Jayne looked back at her, slightly unnerved, but mostly confused. Oblivious to the expressions exchanged, Wash looked up from where he was massaging his wife’s shoulders.

“You know there’s a moon where the principal form of recreation is –“

“Not now dear,” sighed Zoe, nestling back between his knees.

Kaylee stepped down into the passenger lounge, an eager look on her face.

“Simon’s cooking us dinner,” she began excitedly, sitting down next to River who shifted aside to make room.

“The doctor can cook?” asked Zoe incredulously.

“I’ve never met a one who can,” Book called from his room. Tying back his mane of hair he stuck his head out around the door. “They can work wonders on a live patient, but present them with a cut of beef and they don’t have the first idea of what to do with it.”

“I’m sure he’ll do great!” exclaimed Kaylee, looking a little hurt at this apparent lack of faith in Simon.

“Searing a steak is the culinary equivalent of cauterising human flesh. Stop the blood flow.” River didn’t look up from her activity, and was oblivious to the various looks shot in her direction.

“We’re having steak?” asked Jayne, looking up from his own work, eyes aglow with carnivorous excitement.

“Not when it’s been compared to a surgical procedure,” said Wash. “Vegetables are okay aren’t they? You can’t operate on a tomato? Can you?”

River looked up and moved to speak, but was cut off by Jayne.

“Those pretty hands have probably never even boiled an egg,” he pointed out, efficiently snapping together the newly cleaned and oiled segments of Vera that he had laid out on the low table.

“Yes, but I’m sure whatever he cooks will at least be hygienic,” said Inara, bundling her calligraphy and rising from the small stool she had carried from her own shuttle, allowing her to work and enjoy the company of her fellow travellers. She smiled as Jayne pulled a face and commenced wiping his greasy hands on a similarly greasy rag.

“No, it’s shiny!” said Kaylee. “The captain’s up there helping out some.”

“Oh dear god! Mal? In the kitchen?” A look of amused horror crossed Inara’s face.

“I think,” began Zoe, standing up from the floor, “that tonight's dinner plans, however successful so far, should at least be supervised by those who know what’s going on. Are you coming Shepherd?”

“I’ve not performed miracles before,” Book stepped out of his room to join Zoe. “But there is a first time for everything.”

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Steve Lang: I thought this story was imaginative, and well thought out. I also think it was an original piece, and not a rehash of previous scifi stories I've read in the past.Thank you for the effort put into this tale, and I look forward to reading more of your work!

Chris Rolfe: BOY!!! I sure love what Aer-Ki Jyr did with this series. IMHO he captured the essence of what stargate is all about. Thru out the Stargate stories Aer-Ki wrote Stevens and John Shepard some of the main characters in his stories are pursued by a corrupt I.O.A.. All the while Stevens is changing in...

chrystalwise78: I loved Stargate SG1 and all the characters from the show. I love that you brought them all together for this. Great story, I couldn't stop reading.

Raymond Keith Moon: Great story arc. Nice command of the balance of overview and detail. Feels a bit like a multi-player computer game, but provides satisfying explanations for all the apparent magic. Please keep writing!

ianwatson: The comedy is original and genuinely funny, I have laughed out loud many times reading this book. But the story and the plot are also really engaging. The opening two or three chapters seem quite character-dense but they all soon come to life and there is no padding, filling or wasted time readin...

Jaslyn: I loved reading this so much!! The transformation of Nina's self-esteem was incredible to read, and while I was rooting for Parker halfway through, I was very satisfied when Harrison and Nina finally got everything straight. The side characters were adorable - I especially loved Anna, Richel, Mic...

John Smith: This is what Sci Fi is all about. Reads like early Heinlein. In the style of Space Cadets. No esoteric problems..but good ol blaster and space action with a host of relatable characters

Hawkebat: Playing both Kotor I & II and Swtor I found the story line interesting and it held me until chapter 35 Very good story and plot flow until then, very few technical errors. I felt that the main character was a bit under and over powered, as it fought for balance. The last few chapters felt too f...

Ruby0h: Overall I thought your story was really good! It drew me in right away and kept me interested as the story progressed. I loved the character of Kayla being inserted into this story, and the way she affected and shaped the life of the original story into something totally new and interesting. I lo...

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Julia Summers PA: Reading this now. It's fun, hilariously fabulous yet taste of what you desire in a unusual read. I will post an actual review when I am finished. But so far loving the flow and the story seems to keep me drawn

Schaelz: I was intrigued from the second I started reading, and it kept my interest the whole way through. Chelsea has a way with words that will enchant you until the very end. She is very poetic with the way she mixes genres and keeps you on the edge of your seat. The main character is also very relat...

shawnas26: I knocked it out in one sitting and enjoyed it thoroughly. Thanks for sharing! :) I'll be looking forward to reading the next in the series.

internathunal: I was held captive by your sense of style. I would love to see more from you. I enjoyed this immensely.

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