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Save Me

By DariaD


Save Me - by Globus

See me take my bows
And I’m heading for the exits
I can’t stick around

This life’s been hard
And I can’t see the sense in fighting it anymore
Can’t you let me go
Won’t you show me the door

Two years later, I’m sitting here locked up in this cage. It would be unwise of me to say I am not responsible for all the damage and death I have caused, but it is a lie to say all of it shall be blamed on me. You surely must understand the importance of Thor not obtaining the throne. He was simply too foolish and reckless to handle Asgard properly.

But no one would have listened to me. Loki, the God of Lies and Mischief, the Silvertongue. I was looked down upon due to my practice and study of magic. It was simply the only thing I could have done.

And have I not done enough to benefit Asgard? I got rid of Laufey, I stopped Thor from ruining the kingdom and the Nine Realms...yet here I am, still untrustworthy and now confined to a life of solitude. I no longer see a reason to exist.

’Cause I’ve made mistakes
That have hurt the ones I’ve loved
And I’ve thrown them under the bus
One too many times

There can be no redemption for a sinner such as I
Won’t you wish me to the cornfield now
Won’t you help me stop living a lie

I am truly sorry Mother. For everything I have done and all the pain I have caused you. It was surely never my intention to hurt you or cause you trouble. Everything I have ever done...was done with a purpose and a reason. I am not reckless like my brother had once been. I have made mistakes, but we are not perfect - even as Gods. I will never forget the days when you trained me to use magic, Mother. You were - and are - the only person who has ever truly cared about me and loved me. And I deeply wish I could have given back that same affection. I am truly sorry Mother.

So here I am in the corner of a dark room
The same way I began
Alone with these mournful thoughts
And a loaded gun in my hand

I sit here, weeping and screaming, my heart finally broken. Cast away into the deepest part of the dungeons, rejected by all. A story I have once lived before, when Laufey threw me away into the temple. I am forever shunned into the dark corner of my life, unwanted by all.

Death. Death is the only punishment suited for a sinner such as I. Everyone believes that, even if they will not utter the words. I no longer see a purpose to my existence, thus my existence shall be no more. Yet I am trapped in this world against my will, the AllFather holding the key to my life...and death. Deprived of every right and action, I am confined to this cage.

But a foolish part of me
Still holds out for a shred of humanity
For a queen in a robe or a knight on a steed
Can’t you see that I’m just a child on his knees

Hah...It is laughable. Me, the God of Mischief and Lies, relying on you Mother, for sanity. Even I have not been able to stay strong, I have crumbled down and shattered to pieces. With nothing left in my life, the thought of you kept me alive, gave me the will to live. Yet are no longer with me Mother, but in my thoughts. Still I dream and I wish to see you, to feel your arms around you. To live that same life I had as a boy, when everything was perfect and I was happy.

Save me from fear and pain
And love will rain on me
Save me today
Before tomorrow finds me at rest

Save me from fear and pain
And love come down and rain on me
Save me today
For tomorrow will find me at rest

Save me. I have suffered enough, don’t you think? To find out you are simply a relic collected for a political reason. To find out you are the creature the people of your land despise and fear. Is that not punishment enough? Two years in a cell, all alone without a visitor and nothing but my mind and magic to occupy my mind from my gruesome thoughts.

Save me. From this hell, from this damned world. What use is a life if there is nothing left of it. Everything I have held dear to my heart has been wrenched from my grasp and destroyed. A tomorrow with nothing is a tomorrow which should not exist.

Now I’m standing alone in the moment of truth
As the judgement’s handed down
And my feet are scarred from the broken glass
Strewn across the ground

Then you come to my side
And only to you I confide
That I’ve been battered and shattered and bruised and abused
For the very very last time
Won’t you help me, just

In my memory I stand before you once again, AllFather. Waiting for my judgment, patiently watching as my last rights are snatched from my grasp. And in reality, I sit here, bleeding inside and out, weeping for your loss, Mother. For my loss. For ours. Not the cutting nor the scratching will help ease the pain; it is etched deep into my heart and into every crevice of my memory. I am damned to a life of solitude and pain, having nothing but a memory of the only one who has loved me purely and unconditionally.

And then you are here, beside me - in my memory. I cannot help but be brutally honest with you, my heart is tearing and I cannot keep all the sinful words pouring out of my mouth back. Please, please ignore this. This is not me; this is the abandoned and rejected child, left alone to die in the land of ice.

Yet I still reach for salvation. For your love and affection and help. It is too late, I know. But there is always a chance, there is always a way, is there not? Please Mother, don’t leave me, don’t abandon me. For the last time I ask you for forgiveness. Help me. Save me.

Save me from fear and pain
And love reign o’er me
Save me, Save me today
For tomorrow will find me at rest

Save me from fear and pain
And love will rain on me
Save me today
For tomorrow, find me at rest
Find me at rest

Your face fades from my memory as reality engulfs my mind, bringing me back. Back to this forsaken place, this hell full of disappointment. Tears stream down my face as I relive my last memory of you.

Save me. From this hell, from this damned world. What use is a life if there is nothing left of it. Everything I have held dear to my heart has been wrenched from my grasp and destroyed. A tomorrow with nothing is a tomorrow which should not exist.

Someone...Save me.

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