AN: Okay this is a two part songfic. Originally I was only going to write this first one, but midway through the idea for the second one came and I couldn't reject it because it was too awesome. Italics are lyrics, all from the song "Lie" by David Cook. (amazing song, btw, if you have not heard, look it up) It also doesn't hurt to listen to the song while reading, because the mood of the music really helps.
Disclaimer before I forget: I still do not own Scrubs, nor do I own David Cook. All I have is an empty social life, the David Cook album (coincidentally about the only album I can listen to from beginning to end without song skipping), and a ridiculous obsession with everything Scrubs. All rights belong to people who are not, you know, me.
Don't say a word, I'm okay with the quiet.
The truth is gonna change everything...
I could see it in her eyes, could already tell what she was going to say. Neither of us had spoken a word in the last ten minutes, but for once I greatly preferred the silence. Silence was less painful than her words would be. I knew what was coming, and I didn't want to hear the truth.
"JD, I – "
I shook my head fervently and she fell quiet, except for something that sounded like a sob. I wasn't sure because I wasn't looking at her now. I stared vacantly at the opposite wall, trying to convince myself that this wasn't really true. I needed this, needed just a little bit longer.
"JD, I'm getting tired." She stood up and had turned toward the door but I reached out and grabbed her arm to stop her. She swiveled back to me, her expression torn between anger and desperation.
"Elliot, please." I knew that I must look pathetic, but I couldn't do this just yet. "Let's just go to bed." Elliot looked like she wanted to protest but I cut across her. "Just one more night."
Something shiny rolled down her cheek and I could see her chin trembling and she finally nodded. We both moved into the bedroom and went around our typical routine, until we were both snuggled comfortably beneath the covers. The only uncomfortable part was the foot of space between us on the mattress.
The silence had persisted but I was grateful for it. The longer we didn't talk, the longer I could pretend that this wasn't happening. We had tried so hard, given so much, but it seemed that some things were beyond repair. So instead we lay in the darkness, facing each other but not actually looking at the other's face. I was watching her out of the corner of my eye, taking in every contour of her face, which was alarmingly sharp in the harsh moonlight.
I needed her to tell me that everything was going to be alright. That I would find out this was just a bad dream and would wake up with her in my arms. That I had never seen what I knew I had seen in her eyes. In her false smile. I had to hear from her that we would make it through the night perfectly fine.
"Elliot?" I asked into the darkness. She didn't move, but I heard her make a small noise that I took as a prompt to go on. "Lie to me."
Silence. And then… "I love you."
I don't mind if you wait before you tear me apart.
Look me in the eye. Lie, lie, lie.