SAUDADE (1)
It was the first official day of being single again and the day I leave for America. As a ritual, I check all the things before leaving my home. All the baggages and my suitcase? Check. My watch and wallet? Check. Passport? Check. A kiss from him before leaving? I had to leave this one.
More like, I had to get used to mornings like these. Without a trace of him. I wonder how i'd manage to start school without seeing his jubilant face. But I'd figure it out soon.
I kept looking everywhere for him. I was at the airport, there was time still. I hope he'd come for the last goodbye. I wanted to see him one last time, before I left the country and him.
I soon spotted a figure whose features were more or less just like him. The same smile, the same teeth, the same hair, the same eyes. Just a few years younger. He waved to me and grabbed my attention.
“Jeongwoo, it's so nice to see you!” “Hyung!”He hugged me tight. He barely reached my torso, well, he was barely 9.
“Are you really going?” He was just like his brother.
“Hyung has to go, but I promise I'd come back and visit!” I assured him. I loved him too much as well. Everything that belongs to Jungkook, is precious to me, including his family.
“Kookie Hyung wasn't feeling well, so he told me to give you this.” He handed me a small box, nearly wrapped in the decorative paper.
I knew it. I somehow can sense it when he's around but today I couldn't. Maybe he's sick, maybe he's just sitting in the car that dropped Jeongwoo off, maybe he doesn't want to see me, maybe he can't see me.
I gave him something too. I gave him a package through the hands of his younger brother, a card. A card that subtly gave him my apologies that I was well aware he didn't need. I don't know why, but I just wanted to give him something so that he doesn't forget me completely.
I slowly unwrapped the gift, as I was taking off, and a bracelet fell in my hand. It was something he made for me, with our initials engraved.
Stupid, Jeon Jungkook. How can I concentrate carrying around a piece of you every day? You know I'm going to wear it religiously now.
I giggled. He never changes. He never stops being affectionate. Even after I broke his heart, he still made sure to send me his love and gave a piece of himself to accompany me along. I couldn't help but shed a tear.
I am supposed to be happy.
I just aspire to be happier as the days pass by. Bye bye, Jeon Jungkook. Thank you, for everything.
-
More like, I had to get used to mornings like these. Without a trace of him. I wonder how i'd manage to start school without seeing his jubilant face. But I'd figure it out soon.
I kept looking everywhere for him. I was at the airport, there was time still. I hope he'd come for the last goodbye. I wanted to see him one last time, before I left the country and him.
I soon spotted a figure whose features were more or less just like him. The same smile, the same teeth, the same hair, the same eyes. Just a few years younger. He waved to me and grabbed my attention.
“Jeongwoo, it's so nice to see you!” “Hyung!”He hugged me tight. He barely reached my torso, well, he was barely 9.
“Are you really going?” He was just like his brother.
“Hyung has to go, but I promise I'd come back and visit!” I assured him. I loved him too much as well. Everything that belongs to Jungkook, is precious to me, including his family.
“Kookie Hyung wasn't feeling well, so he told me to give you this.” He handed me a small box, nearly wrapped in the decorative paper.
I knew it. I somehow can sense it when he's around but today I couldn't. Maybe he's sick, maybe he's just sitting in the car that dropped Jeongwoo off, maybe he doesn't want to see me, maybe he can't see me.
I gave him something too. I gave him a package through the hands of his younger brother, a card. A card that subtly gave him my apologies that I was well aware he didn't need. I don't know why, but I just wanted to give him something so that he doesn't forget me completely.
I slowly unwrapped the gift, as I was taking off, and a bracelet fell in my hand. It was something he made for me, with our initials engraved.
Stupid, Jeon Jungkook. How can I concentrate carrying around a piece of you every day? You know I'm going to wear it religiously now.
I giggled. He never changes. He never stops being affectionate. Even after I broke his heart, he still made sure to send me his love and gave a piece of himself to accompany me along. I couldn't help but shed a tear.
I am supposed to be happy.
I just aspire to be happier as the days pass by. Bye bye, Jeon Jungkook. Thank you, for everything.
-
