☁️ - Sugawara
⚠️ TW: S*ICIDE MENTIONS ⚠️
Warm... Comfy... Heartbeat... What.. Happened?... I remember...
It was movie night. Me and Koshi were watching F/M (favourite movie). I'm resting on his chest, snuggled up in a warm fuzzy blanket, on our couch.
Suga's heartbeat.. It's so calm.
'Huh? It's speeding up. Is he sick? What's happening to him?' I wondered as I put my hand on his chest and looked up at his facial expressions.
He looks troubled..! I put my hand on his forehead and it seemed that his temperature was getting warmer. "Suga? Suga darling?" I tapped on his shoulder lightly, trying not to scare him.
"N- Nnegh.." Sugawara gently opened his eyes and groaned slightly.
"Koshi? What happened? You looked scared and you were sweating like crazy.." I looked him straight in the eyes.
He averted my gaze. "N- Nothing, sugar.. Nothing happened.." I knew he was lying..
"Koshi.." I made eye contact with him for what felt like 3 hours, but in actuality was 3 seconds.
He got up and walked to the kitchen in a hurry. "I just need a little water is all..! haha.." He claimed in a rush to brush off the topic, getting a glass of water.
I got up and stood in front of him, staring him right in his eyes. "Don't lie to me, Koshi. What. Happened?" I interrogated him further.
Sugawara's POV -
Grrekk! Damn it.. I don't want to worry her.. But I don't want her to think I'm hiding something or that I can't trust her. Y/N, I'm sorry, but I can't tell you yet.
"Sugar, seriously. I'm fine." I smiled peacefully in attempt to sweep the topic under the rug. I drank the water I had gotten and put the cup down.
"It's still very early, we should move to bed and sleep there, hm?" I briskly walked into our shared bedroom. Y/N followed behind with a suspicious look on her face.
Your POV -
I followed my very suspicious husband into our room and watched him get into bed, signalling for me to get in too.
I got into bed and cuddled him, there was a slight awkwardness between us that night.
I fell asleep.
________________________
"Nneeagh.. No.. Stop.." Is that.. Koshi?
"Y/N!!" I leaped from the bed and saw Suga, dazed and worried, in a coldsweat. I knew something was up.
"Suga?! Sugawara what happened?!" I spoke up, speaking louder than I intended.
"Nothing, sugar.. Nothing at all." He looked away once again.
"Stop it.."
"Huh?"
"Stop lying and keeping things from me! Please! I'm worried about you Koshi.."
"..."
He kept quiet, had his head down, looking up at me.
"Koshi, if you don't tell me I am going to walk out this door, right now." I was serious.
"W- what?" He looked at me with wide eyes.
"If we're going to be in a healthy relationship, we need communication, and you're not giving me that." I stared at him, waiting for him to say something.
He paused. "I've... been having nightmares.." No shit? You literally woke up screaming but go off I guess.
"What about?" I questioned him further, and looked into his beautiful brown irises.
"You.. getting killed, or killing someone.. sometimes even commiting suicide." Faint tears propped up on the sides of his eyes as he looked down at our sheets in obvious discomfort and sadness.
"Koshi.. you don't have to keep it all in all the time. You can talk to me!.. what was this one about..?" I asked hesitantly.
"..." He paused again. "You walked out on me." The tears in his eyes came gushing out and he struggled to wipe them all away.
"..." I stared, watching him believe I could ever do such a thing. I cupped his cheek as the tears stopped slowly, resting on his soft, clear, red face.
I looked right into his eyes as he propped his head up, snuggling his cheek into my palm.
"I could never walk out on you, I love you too much to do that, duhh." I said with a heartfelt smile plastered on my face.
"Oh, Y/N..." Sugawara looked into my eyes as his tears were fully dried by now, and kissed me passionately.
No words could express our emotions in that moment. We kissed unlike we ever had before. We're married and probably kissed a bunch of other times, but this.. this was the first time it felt like he was 100% transparent with handling his emotions around me.
Silence. No words. Just raw emotion and love. He kissed me over and over, trailing them down to my neck and collar bone. A few breathy gasps and hicks filled the air, and the arms we have wrapped around each other got tighter.
He looked up at me and looked back down at my neck, looking for a spot to mark his territory. He kissed my neck and sucked, leaving a dark spot.
I moaned and he chuckled, leaving my face red. He put his hands on the bottom of my shirt.
Warm... Comfy... Heartbeat... What.. Happened?... I remember...
It was movie night. Me and Koshi were watching F/M (favourite movie). I'm resting on his chest, snuggled up in a warm fuzzy blanket, on our couch.
Suga's heartbeat.. It's so calm.
'Huh? It's speeding up. Is he sick? What's happening to him?' I wondered as I put my hand on his chest and looked up at his facial expressions.
He looks troubled..! I put my hand on his forehead and it seemed that his temperature was getting warmer. "Suga? Suga darling?" I tapped on his shoulder lightly, trying not to scare him.
"N- Nnegh.." Sugawara gently opened his eyes and groaned slightly.
"Koshi? What happened? You looked scared and you were sweating like crazy.." I looked him straight in the eyes.
He averted my gaze. "N- Nothing, sugar.. Nothing happened.." I knew he was lying..
"Koshi.." I made eye contact with him for what felt like 3 hours, but in actuality was 3 seconds.
He got up and walked to the kitchen in a hurry. "I just need a little water is all..! haha.." He claimed in a rush to brush off the topic, getting a glass of water.
I got up and stood in front of him, staring him right in his eyes. "Don't lie to me, Koshi. What. Happened?" I interrogated him further.
Sugawara's POV -
Grrekk! Damn it.. I don't want to worry her.. But I don't want her to think I'm hiding something or that I can't trust her. Y/N, I'm sorry, but I can't tell you yet.
"Sugar, seriously. I'm fine." I smiled peacefully in attempt to sweep the topic under the rug. I drank the water I had gotten and put the cup down.
"It's still very early, we should move to bed and sleep there, hm?" I briskly walked into our shared bedroom. Y/N followed behind with a suspicious look on her face.
Your POV -
I followed my very suspicious husband into our room and watched him get into bed, signalling for me to get in too.
I got into bed and cuddled him, there was a slight awkwardness between us that night.
I fell asleep.
________________________
"Nneeagh.. No.. Stop.." Is that.. Koshi?
"Y/N!!" I leaped from the bed and saw Suga, dazed and worried, in a coldsweat. I knew something was up.
"Suga?! Sugawara what happened?!" I spoke up, speaking louder than I intended.
"Nothing, sugar.. Nothing at all." He looked away once again.
"Stop it.."
"Huh?"
"Stop lying and keeping things from me! Please! I'm worried about you Koshi.."
"..."
He kept quiet, had his head down, looking up at me.
"Koshi, if you don't tell me I am going to walk out this door, right now." I was serious.
"W- what?" He looked at me with wide eyes.
"If we're going to be in a healthy relationship, we need communication, and you're not giving me that." I stared at him, waiting for him to say something.
He paused. "I've... been having nightmares.." No shit? You literally woke up screaming but go off I guess.
"What about?" I questioned him further, and looked into his beautiful brown irises.
"You.. getting killed, or killing someone.. sometimes even commiting suicide." Faint tears propped up on the sides of his eyes as he looked down at our sheets in obvious discomfort and sadness.
"Koshi.. you don't have to keep it all in all the time. You can talk to me!.. what was this one about..?" I asked hesitantly.
"..." He paused again. "You walked out on me." The tears in his eyes came gushing out and he struggled to wipe them all away.
"..." I stared, watching him believe I could ever do such a thing. I cupped his cheek as the tears stopped slowly, resting on his soft, clear, red face.
I looked right into his eyes as he propped his head up, snuggling his cheek into my palm.
"I could never walk out on you, I love you too much to do that, duhh." I said with a heartfelt smile plastered on my face.
"Oh, Y/N..." Sugawara looked into my eyes as his tears were fully dried by now, and kissed me passionately.
No words could express our emotions in that moment. We kissed unlike we ever had before. We're married and probably kissed a bunch of other times, but this.. this was the first time it felt like he was 100% transparent with handling his emotions around me.
Silence. No words. Just raw emotion and love. He kissed me over and over, trailing them down to my neck and collar bone. A few breathy gasps and hicks filled the air, and the arms we have wrapped around each other got tighter.
He looked up at me and looked back down at my neck, looking for a spot to mark his territory. He kissed my neck and sucked, leaving a dark spot.
I moaned and he chuckled, leaving my face red. He put his hands on the bottom of my shirt.
"Are you okay with me.. doing this?" He was asking if I wanted to go far tonight.. damn, consent is so hot..
"Yes. I'm sure." I gave him a reassuring smile and allowed him to take off my shirt for me. He then took off his own, exposing his bare toned chest. He's so muscular, and it's probably from volleyball.
One by one, clothes were being tossed on the floor until we were completely naked, and Sugawara was on top of me. I put my arms around his shoulders, holding them tight. I nibbled on his neck as he felt my sides and waist.
I jumped when he suddenly put his length up to my entrance and rubbed against me, slowly.
"Are you ready?" He asked me, looking deep into my eyes as his softened when I looked back.
"Yes.." I'm sure of it. I want him.
He held my waist down as if telling me to brace myself when he put his length through my opening. I threw my head back onto the pillow in pleasure, removing one of my hands from his shoulders and slapping it over my mouth.
An unavoidable moan escaped my lips.
"K- Ko..shi~..!" I pulled him down into a tight embrace, small tears forming on the ends of my lashes as my eyes were tightly shut.
"Can I move my hips..?" Sugawara asked in a gentle tone.
"Y- yes.." I answered shyly, as this was our time as a couple.
He did exactly as he asked, and he moved his hips slowly. He was thinking of a way to do it without hurting me, that much is obvious.
He cupped my breasts and kissed me all over, loving me with every tender movement. He gently played with my breasts and went a little faster when he saw my expression soften, signalling that the painful part was over.
And with that, the whole night was breath-taking.
