Phoenix' transformation

Our sins


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Warning- in this chapter rape, murder and abuse will be mentioned.

After three days at the hospital, Emma was glad to be finally released and good to go home. Well, actually go to Regina's house since brunette insisted to have Emma under her supervision and care. Mary Margaret tried to convince Regina that she can take care of Emma, but after furious glare Regina sent her, she dropped it. After all, Regina was a doctor and she was taking few days off, reachable only for emergencies.

''Ready to go?'' asked Regina as she walked into the room

''I was born ready.'' Emma smiled ''Just get me out of here, please.''

''I parked the car in front, we'll be out of here very soon.'' Regina said and then added ''Wheelchair is outside.''

''What?!'' shrieked Emma ''I'm walking out of here, goddamnit!''

''NO, you're not!'' argued Regina ''As your doctor, I order you to get into that chair! It's hospital policy. Besides, I wouldn't put it past you to accidentally kill yourself on our way out. You're much safer in my steady hands, then on your clumsy feet.''


''No!'' Regina shook her head and walked out of the room and behind the wheelchair in front of them. She mentioned to the chair ''C'mon. We don't have all day.''

''Fine'' huffed Emma as she seated herself into the wheelchair ''Is this how it'll always be? You bossy and I obedient?''

''Well, dear, I am the queen.'' smiled Regina as she pushed laughing Emma down the hall

It took them 20 minutes to settle Emma into guest room, her clothes were in the closet and her personal belongings such as few framed pictures were placed on top of the dresser and her nightstand. Room was fairly big with queen-sized bed and big windows which made the room brightly illuminated.

''Did you move me out of Mary Margaret's place?'' asked Emma with a chuckle

''I didn't take all.'' Regina responded ''I left ugly clothes. And slippers. I left those slippers.''

''My bunny slippers?!'' Emma gasped ''How am I supposed to walk in the house then? Barefoot?''

''Of course not, there are slippers for you in the closet, they're new and warm.'' said Regina and Emma made her way to the closet

''Oh hell no, this aren't slippers!'' said Emma turning around holding a pair of warm and soft but painfully plain slippers ''This is what you wear while you're in hospital or at someones house as a guest.'' she paused ''This is just wrong, to have a pair of slippers without personality.''

''Personality?'' Regina asked rolling her eyes ''Your slippers need a personality?''

''Of course, otherwise they're just boring.'' Emma said ''You need to appreciate little things.''

''Like slippers?''

''Yes, and pj's and stuff like that. They can make you feel a little happier, there was even a study about it and they proved it.'' Emma said putting slippers on the floor and stepping into them ''Comfy, but they didn't make me feel a little...umm...excited.''

Regina laughed at that and then moved towards Emma ''You don't need slippers to excite you, that's what I'm here for.'' she winked, but stopped grinning Emma who wanted to kiss her

''Regina...''Emma whined

''You're not strong enough for that.'' said Regina pulling away ''You just got out of hospital.''

''Didn't you hear that kisses cure boo-boos?'' Emma pouted and Regina laughed at her face

''Good god, you're worse than your son.'' said Regina through laughter ''Let's eat something.'' she added still laughing as she pulled Emma with her

Regina made them a couple of light sandwiches and placed them on the kitchen counter, because as Emma said, there is no need to eat at the big dinner table.

''Regina, you know you didn't need to take days off because of me?'' Emma asked, little insecure how to approach the subject.

''There is a difference between a need and want and Emma I wanted to stay here and be with you, because I need to know you're alright.'' said Regina ''This, what we have, this is the best thing I ever had. Everything I ever wanted in my life and now,''she paused and placed her hand on Emma's ''now, I don't want to miss a second of it while it lasts.''

''I love you, Regina.'' Emma whispered ''I'm so utterly and completely in love with you.''

''Good, that makes us two then.'' smiled Regina

Henry, Regina and Emma were seated in living room and were watching a movie Henry chosen. After a while Emma fell asleep in half sitting, half lying position on the couch making Regina's shoulder her personal pillow.

''I don't know how she can sleep in that position.'' mused Regina under her breath


''Yeah, baby?'' asked Regina turning to her left where Henry was seated covered with white fluffy blanket

''Can I ask you something important?'' he fidgeted a bit

''You know you can, Henry. What's going on?'' asked Regina stroking his head

''I know you're my mom and all, but I was thinking...''he gulped ''Since you and Emma are together and she lives here, could I call her ma?''he paused and then nervously continued ''I know you're my mom and I don't want to hurt you...''

''Yes, you can, baby.'' she stopped his rant. ''I think she would like that and besides I know how you like her and how you enjoy spending your time with her.''

''With both of you.'' said Henry ''We're family, right?''

''Yes, we are honey.'' said Regina with tears in her eyes as her little boy snuggled into her left side while she kissed the top of his head.

Emma's dying and he wants us be a family forever. This will break his heart, both his and mine. God, Emma, why the hell do you need to be so lovable and caring?

Regina woke up next morning, her mind full of heavy thoughts from the day before. Her Emma was dying and she couldn't do anything about it. She briefly considered magic, but she knew all of her books by heart and she knew there wasn't anything about healing a heart in them. She sighed, how the hell will she go through this?!

Well, that's what she deserved, wasn't it? She killed, she manipulated and used people as pawns they were. She was cruel and vicious person full of hate and resentment. What the hell could she expect-a happy ending?! As those thoughts ran through her head, tears began rolling down her cheeks as she lowered her head and started sobbing.

After a minute or two, she felt two arms embracing her from behind, but this time- it weren't small hands she expected. No, she was embraced by strong, yet unusually soft arms, who pulled her body into blonde behind her. Her sobs were more audible now and she felt small kissed as Emma planted them on her neck and shoulder.

''Shh, I'm here. We'll be okay.'' blonde reassured her

''How can it be okay?'' demanded Regina while sobbing ''You're dying.''

Emma spun her around and put one hand around Regina's waist and another on brunette's cheek. ''I would give my soul to the devil himself if he would let me stay with you here.''said Emma ''I'm so sorry.''

''Don't apologize for something beyond your control.'' said Regina and then chuckled through tears ''I'm never getting my happy ending. I was a fool thinking that a monster like me could be happy.''

''You're not a monster.'' said Emma sternly ''We really need to talk about whatever troubles you.'' she paused ''But after Henry goes to school.''

''He'll be up in a few minutes.''

''Go take a shower, I'll make sure he eats and gets on the bus.'' Emma said and added ''And before you complain, kid will not die if he drives a school bus once in his life.I'm pretty sure he'll be happy about it.''

''Alright, thank you.'' said Regina kissing Emma's cheek and moving upstairs.

Emma was right, fed and ready Henry was excited to go to school in bus full of his friends. After 45 minutes, Regina made her way downstairs and found Emma sitting on the couch with two cups of coffee in front of her on coffee table.

''Ready to talk?'' asked Emma

''Yeah.'' responded Regina ''Just promise me not to ran away until I finish.''

''I promise.'' Emma said and took Regina's hand in her own as Regina sat down next to Emma.

And Regina did tell Emma everything- how abusive her mother was and how her father never stopped her, how her mother made sure her high school sweetheart was out of her future, how her mother forced her to marry a wealthy 55 year old man when she was just 16 and how he raped her during the nights he came to her room, to her bed. She explained how she met a man- Gold who promised her everything will be alright if she would just forget her emotions and do as he tell her. Glancing at Emma, she could see she had blonde's undivided attention so she continued explaining how she manipulated people around her, even made sure they were killed so they wouldn't be in her path of revenge.

''Now, that's some past.'' said Emma still holding Regina's hand ''Your mom killed that boy you were seeing in high school because someone tipped you to her?'' at Regina's nod Emma said ''God, that must have been terrible life to live, Regina.''

''I'm sitting here, telling you that I have blood on my hands and you're feeling sorry for me?'' asked Regina, obviously she couldn't believe it

''Regina, you aren't bad at your heart, I know it.'' Emma started ''You would never raised Henry the way you did if you were evil in your heart, you do realize that, don't you?'' Emma asked ''With life you led, it's no surprise you did what you did. I'm not minimizing your wrong doing, it's pretty bad-I'm giving you that. But don't you see that you were manipulated from the beginning of your life?''

At Regina's silence Emma said ''You are forgiven, Regina. In my eyes, in my heart, you are forgiven and I know that doesn't mean much, but let me ask you- have you ever killed an innocent person, a person who didn't do anything bad to you or others, just for thrill of it?''

''Never. I couldn't do that, I never had a reason to kill an innocent person.'' she said ''If they were nice to me, I left them alone making sure that they wouldn't be harmed.''

''Well, Regina, sorry to bursts your bubble, but protecting isn't something monsters do.'' Emma said ''You were just a woman getting her revenge.'' paused Emma ''Besides, you're not the only woman in this room who has blood on her hands.''

''What?'' asked Regina

''When I was 14 I was placed with a family. They already had three adopted kids, all girls.'' she started ''I noticed the man going into Chloe's room one night and asked her what he was doing there next day. She said I'll see in a year, apparently he would wait until we're 15 before he started to rape us. In few weeks, I noticed the looks he directed at me and there were touches that seemed to be fairly innocent, but I knew better. You know I was pretty good at school and had extra classes with my chemistry teacher to prepare me for college. One day, she stepped outside to talk to another teacher who needed a word with her, I took cyanide. Not a lot, but enough to make sure that once he consumes it he would die.'' she paused ''When I came home, he was already on his fourth bear, so when he demanded to fetch him another one, he never noticed unnatural bubbles forming in his bottle. He died after a few minutes, he struggled for breath, but couldn't yell out because cyanide already destroyed his lungs and finally his heart stopped and he slumped down dead. I took the beer bottle and tossed it into the trash of our neighbour. His wife found him in the morning, well after the garbage people took away the garbage. Police just said that with his heart illness and his refusal of taking care of his health they could rule out any violent death. The report said that he died from heart attack caused by weight and not consuming his blood pressure medicine.'' she said

''Jesus, Emma.'' said Regina ''I'm glad you got rid of him before he could harm you.''

''Me too.'' said Emma ''Regina, we both have heavy past, we both have blood on our hands, but we have it because we protect ourselves and people we love.''

''We are quite a pair, aren't we?'' chuckled Regina, her cheeks still wet from her tears.

''That we are, love. That we are.'' said Emma smiling a bit

Well, that's it! Tell me what you think about the chapter! :)

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