The Queen Falls
Chapter Forty-Seven: The Queen Falls:
What the hell is this, how did I even get to this point? Just, why...? I don't understand it! I set out to consume him, but who's consuming whom? Things have changed and I don't like it. Not one bit. I'm staring in the mirror at my reflection, trembling. I try to justify my behavior by taking inventory of his faults. There's just nothing to like about him, is there? First of all, he's childish. Also whiny, irritating, and the biggest idiot I've ever fucking met. I wanna rear back, haul off and smack the crap out of him. And that's on a good day. I can feel my face turning red as I sit here thinking of him. My hands clench into fists, and I can feel my left eye begin to twitch.
So why…? Why do I suddenly get so warm and runny around him? Anna giggles at me, and a cut my eyes at her.
"What?" I snap.
"You're in love him," she says.
"I am not!"
"Sounds like it to me."
"Take that back, Anna-chan!" I look up from the mirror with a scowl.
"You're not a good liar, Mother dear. Surely you must know that?"
Feeling a bit exposed, I can't help but lash out, "You can piss right off with that one. And… And, don't call me Shirley."
"Why? Does the truth offend you?"
I fold my arms across my chest and pout like a spoiled child. "You…"
"Are you coming to bed, or not?" Asato asks from our room.
Heh! "Our" room. What the hell am I doing with my life…?
Just to make a big show of things I sigh out loud and roll my eyes before giving in. "Yeah, sure. Be there in a minute!"
III: Losing Battle
His fingers brush against my cheeks. "You are so beautiful." He's a liar. That's what all men do. So, why am I blushing?
"Liar," I hiss.
"I'm not," he insists, with a slight pout. He really isn't, you know, but my own pride doesn't want me to admit tit. Shut up, you sniveling little idiot! He kisses my forehead.
"I love you," Asato whispers. My face is red with embarrassment.
"Which one of us do you love - her or me?"
He lifts my chin, and stares straight into my eyes. "Both."
I turn my head away. "Liar!"
"Aw, you always say that. What do I have to do to convince you otherwise?"
I can't answer him this time. No snappy comeback for that one.
IV: Doll House
I lie in bed with a pained, twisted smile on my face. What's become of me? Men were mere playthings to me. I roll over on my back, and bury my face in my hands. Look at me now. What am I, a caged pet. I used to be free and happy. Now, I've been turned into a housewife. I screw my eyes shut and try not to scream. How do I explain my situation? It's almost as if Asato has gifted my daughter a beautiful diamond necklace. But now, it's become like an obedience collar to me. Dammit, I am no one's property! And certainly not some silly little house pet!
But he doesn't see you like that, does he?
"Do you ever shut up?"
Look, I'm just telling you the truth… My inner voice is stressing me out, and making me grind my teeth. Still, she has a point. Officious bitch that she is.
V: Coming to Terms
Why can't you just admit that you love him too?
"Because I don't!"
Now who's the liar, hmmm?
"I am not!" I look inside of myself, it's as if I can feel my inner guide frowning back at me. Judging my every move. "What do you want from me?"
"Hello? Listen to yourself! I can feel your heart within mine."
Her giggling further annoys me. "It shoots off like firecrackers whenever you're around Asato-kun."
My cheeks turn bright red. "It does not."
"Come on. How long will you keep this up? Just come out and say it! What are you so afraid of?"
I draw my mouth closed. "I… I am not afraid."
"Then be honest with yourself, just this once!"
Damn, she has me in a corner. I've run out of excuses. I puff up my cheeks. "Fine, I… I…" I grab onto my pillow. "I love your idiot husband. There, I said it! You happy now?"
Was that so hard?
My so-called spirit guide is annoying me right now. "Go AWAY! I don't need this right now..."
Whatever you say
I lie awake in our communal bed, smirking to myself. Just because I'm domesticated and in love, doesn't mean that I'm not the same hardnosed bitch that I've been for centuries.
The smirk turns to a grin when I realize - this arrangement might just work out in my favor, after all…