Figuring Things out or not
“It is time for you two to go, child. Time is of the essence,” the golden dragon said to me, and those were the last words I heard her speak.
Her eyes flashed gold with the wisdom of an ancient being, and then she addressed Seth’s dragon with a low key roar, which responded back in the same tone. It was obvious that they were having a conversation of some sorts, but all I heard was the same monotone tone emitted by the two dragons, the sounds coming from them reinforcing each other, as though they belonged to one dragon. Then, Seth’s dragon knelt down, waving its tail sideways, and nudged me towards its back with its muzzle, waiting for me to climb on its back. I got the message, and leaned on its body to move my legs which shook like leaves. I barely lifted one leg, throwing it over its back, inhaling and exhaling heavily with the exertion. Seth’s dragon used its tail to push me further, balancing me right in the center.
Within a few seconds, it was taking off into the air like a rocket. I held onto its neck once more. But, despite flying fast, Seth’s dragon heeded not to imbalance me, or shake me at its back, feeling I was barely holding onto its body. I let the wind wash across my face, laying my head down on one cheek, the coldness feeling good in awakening me from the shocking news. I’d just heard I was going to die. On top of that, all that I’ve ever done would be naught if I couldn’t awaken Seth’s humanity. And, I didn’t know how to do that. The dark days stretched ahead of me, with so much to think about, and do, yet all I wanted was to forget it all and sleep. I was so damn tired, feeble and weak just like a newborn baby.
I must have dozed off as I found myself laying down on the floor, all alone, when I opened my eyes. My hands touched the floor, my fingertips sliding forward, left and right in panic. The ground was gritty and cold to the touch. Where was I, was in the cave? And, where was Seth? I wanted to cry, cursing the darkness. I couldn’t see anything. I shouted in panic, “Seth, where are you?”
Seth’s dragon roared, breathing fire, letting me see its familiar green colors and I sighed in relief. We were back in the cave, and Seth was standing at the entrance, guarding the cave. When it let out its steamy breath, the fire was gone, taking away the only light in the cave. I wish I had carried the greasy rag from Dante’s cave to make a torch in here, waiting for the sun day to arrive in here would drive me nuts.
I couldn’t take it any longer, and I shed fat tears as I sniffed loudly in the damp cave, the sounds echoing around us like water flowing from broken pipes. I was hardly the crying type, I didn’t even remember the last time I had done so back on earth, but since then, my life had drastically changed.
The dragon came to touch me, its muzzle moving up and down my face as though it was consoling me. “Please baby, turn to your humanself Seth,” I said, my voice shaking. “Please Seth,” I cried. But, nothing happened. The dragon continued caressing me in its own way. I wanted to see Seth, not its dragon. I would do anything to see him. I was beginning to believe I would never see him again, and the thought brought fresh tears to my eyes. Crying with my weakly beating heart made me short of breath, and I gasped, trying to draw in precious oxygen to my lungs.
Seth’s dragon licked me, but that didn’t repulse me like Dante’s. I allowed it, seeking any connection with Seth. I actually encouraged it, after all I had no idea how to trigger its human self, perhaps touching, licking me would help.
I smiled as if possessing a hidden knowledge. Why, of course, that could very well be the answer! My crying suddenly stopped as if on command, I felt as though I had discovered the answer to the puzzle. Rawonia’s heart had said being away from the human mates made the dragons mad, taking away the light they craved. Perhaps, that’s exactly what I had to do to bring out Seth’s human self. Being close to him at all times could work. Though it was not his dragon form that was endangered, but his human form, I was hopeful that the same method could work. How many hours or days would it take, I wondered. Did I have that much time? I was too weak to move anyway, and the dragon was not leaving my side. It would happen eventually. I would simply wake up one day in this cave to find Seth lying beside me. Why not, it all made sense. I would take what little hope the thought offered.
After two sun days, and many dark days had passed, and I had spent many cozy hours with Seth’s dragon, I was no longer optimistic. I was suffering, I was trying to stay alive on the bits of fruit the dragon brought to the cave after its short expeditions outside, making sure not to touch the meat which I surmised could very well belong to a human. Thankfully, finding my way in the darkness was becoming second nature to me, but I was getting physically weaker by the day, and my patience was wearing thin. Nothing was happening, not one damn thing. I had even tried kissing Seth’s dragon on the lips, closing my eyes, crossing my fingers, but no magic had happened. Seth was still in his dragon form, and I was not close to understanding how to appeal to his instincts buried deep down somewhere.
On the next sun day, I had had enough, and I decided to try another thing. The closeness was not doing the trick, at least not on its own. What if I weakened Seth’s dragon? Would that, added to the proximity of me as his mate, help bring the man I loved? It was worth a try, I was going to withdraw the dragon’s light, enough to weaken it, but not as much as to kill it. It was a sensitive procedure, I needed to heed the threshold beyond which the dragon would die. I was not too experienced in this anyway, and I had no idea whether I could still use my talent in my weakened state. I would try it, yes, I would try anything, I was that desperate. And, the sun would help me see the changes in the dragon so that I would stop when I felt it was too much.
I hugged Seth’s dragon, I was after all hesitant, scared. I was going to hurt Seth’s dragon which meant I was going to hurt Seth. I was taking a gamble here on the dragon’s life, and that didn’t sit well with me. Damn, if I killed Seth’s dragon by mistake, would Seth also die on earth? Holy shit, I had not thought of this. How could I do this? How could I take the risk? I was between a rock and a hard place, and I had run out of answers. A sense of unease rose out of me, what if I messed this up? It took me hours of going back and forth on my decision which was torturous, was it right or wrong, was it good or bad, would I regret this or not? I pushed back my decision until it was no longer possible, I knew I had to act one way or another when the sun passed its zenith and was about to sink in the horizon.
I hated doing this, but I had run out of options, as always. Unfortunately, things never ran smooth when I found myself cornered like this. My plans in panicky situations were always hasty, spontaneous, and often went awry. I shuddered with the memory of what had happened when I had helped with Rocco’s prison escape.
Well, it was this, or back to nothing. So, I gathered all my courage and touched Seth’s dragon, slowly pulling its light towards myself with the touch of my hand. I felt the feelings of panic, and shock in its eyes as it tried to shake me off, but the power of the pull was simply too strong. I felt horrible when I spotted its eyes widen with the torment of betrayal, yet its love for me still shone undimmed in its eyes. I saw a tear fall from the dragon’s one eye as if it was questioning, inquiring what was happening to its body, and I wanted to cry. I was shaking with the horror of what I was doing to Seth, disgusted with myself. Though the light I was consuming from the dragon was pumping energy into my blood, I wanted none of it. “Seth, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” I muttered over and over again, hoping he’d just hear and understand me. “I just need to try this, I’m sorry, I don’t have any other options,” I repeated in misery.
I stopped when I felt Seth’s dragon struggling to breathe, the remaining light in its body almost falling beyond a minimum threshold. I remembered the heart’s words about dragons feeding on the sun’s rays in this universe, but I felt that Seth’s dragon was simply too exhausted, and depleted to do that right now. Furthermore, the sun was almost gone, not offering much light and hope for the dragon. It fell down, its body no longer able to stand on its own. My heart sank its lowest when I saw that. I felt as though I betrayed him. I knelt down, crawling to the dragon’s barely moving form, touching and patting its body, just trying to stay close. The dragon didn’t reject me, and I felt a glimmer of hope inside me. I slept close to the dragon’s body, never ending the bodily contact till the morning. But, when I opened my eyes, the form and shape I felt beneath my hands didn’t belong to a man. I shouted in fury, and disappointment.
“Damn, what else can I do?” I yelled in vain, as if the heart could answer me. “I can’t take this anymore, I just can’t, damn it!” I raged.
Seth’s poor dragon was barely among the living, and I had achieved nothing. I tried to feed it with the meat that was stored in the cave, but it was slowly dying. I waited for two more days till the next sun day to make sure this method was not working before I decided to give the light all back. Seeing the dragon like that was a pure agony, and knowing I was the one responsible from it all was killing me.
“Enough, it is enough,” I said, as I patted its still form. The dragon had been lying on the floor, even more weakened, and exhausted than me. I touched it gently, and began to gather the light I’d borrowed in me, feeling it whirl in the palm of my hands, waiting, seeking to go back home, where it belonged. I wanted to give it all back, feeling the need to give it all back. The dragon’s body was like a magnet guiding me, helping me as I shaped the destination of the light. When I was sending it all back, I closed my eyes, seeing it all in clarity for the first time since I came in this dark universe.
I gathered the light in three small balls and sent them to three separate destinations in his body, one on the ass, one on the forearm where Seth’s two tattoos stood, and one all over its body to keep the dragon alive, imagining, all the while, the body beneath me as Seth’s human form. If what I felt was right, the light for his dragon was supposed to be gathered and stored where Seth’s life sources had been in his human form. I hoped that would urge the shift.
The shifting however didn’t happen, at least not immediately. But, I kept trying, channeling the light over and over again to keep them stored in the tattoo places, not allowing them to break down and diffuse. I kept the proximity, the touch and the continuous chatting, trying to appeal to all its senses simultaneously. I was paralyzed with shock when I finally saw the miracle happen. The dragon’s neck shortened, its claws withdrew, its horns were pulled back, and its body slowly molded into the loving figure of my boyfriend.
I wanted to laugh at his face expression. Seth was damn confused in his naked form, looking around with a touch of delirium in his beautiful eyes, feeling his body with his fingertips, touching my face, my lips, trying to stand up, just to fall back again like an infant. I didn’t avert my eyes from his nakedness, every inch of his beautifully shaped body sacred for me. I was short of words, the emotions too deep from living a moment that I had craved for so long. Seth, my dear Seth, was right in front of me. I couldn’t hold myself back any longer as I hugged him, and kissed his jaw, his lips as though he was my cup of water in the desert.
He didn’t respond at first, his lips barely moving, rather cold. But, I felt the small pucker of his lips, and I pressed on, seeing his eyes widen at the sensations flowing through him. My pulse rioted out of control when his fingers trailed a tantalizing path along my throat down. It was obvious he didn’t know what he was doing, rather he was going by instinct. Whatever he did or did not think he was doing, it worked. There was a strange fire in my blood, and his hesitant touch intoxicated me, racing through my veins. I had missed him so much, I never wanted to let him go.
That whole night, we didn’t wink an eye till the morning, just gazing into each others’ eyes, discovering the feel of touching, kissing one another like two teenagers in love. Not even one word passed from our lips, instead we communicated our love through our other senses, a fire working its magic in our bodies as we took our fill of one another.
In the morning, when it was all dark, I knew what needed to be done, yet again. I didn’t know how much time I had, I couldn’t take any chances.
“Seth, we need to go to the golden dragon, ” I said, my voice etched with a deep sorrow.
He just nodded, still very careful not to talk.
“We need to fly,” I said, laughing at the irony of it all. I had tried so hard to have him shift to his human form, and now I expected him to go back to his dragon form. “Will you be able to?” I asked, slightly panicking at the thought that maybe he wouldn’t.
I found myself flying at Seth’s back, heading for the golden dragon’s cave within minutes.
“You did it, child. I can feel the change and understanding in him,” the golden dragon said. “Are you ready to go back on earth?”
I was not, I would die back on earth, and I would have yet another impossible mission. I wanted to be with Seth, I wanted to be happy, all things that seemed achievable at the moment. But, I nodded.
The golden dragon didn’t wait for Seth to emerge in his human form, for us to give one another one last kiss, for us to talk about what was awaiting us on earth. No, she didn’t give us any preparation time. Instead, she just touched me, and I felt the second piece of the heart latch itself on the first piece, just like that. I felt much stronger immediately, but I knew what was coming in the next scene, and I looked at Seth’s dragon one last time in panic. I seriously wanted to kill the Goddess for her heartless, merciless, thoughtless behavior, but I couldn’t form any of the vile words to express my feelings. No, I didn’t have that much time. I felt the blackness, and I knew what that meant for the Land of Dragoon. It had exploded.