I'm so stupid
XZORAMAXIMUS THE THIRD / Ronit Coulson
“Oh no!! I’m so stupid” the great wizard shouted in disgust as his feet sunk into birds dropping, a sense of self loath and under achievement overcome him and weighted on his shoulders.
In order to open the shutters for a large black bird to fly out, he wobbled on his heels towards the window, being careful not to smudge the birds dropping.
He then let himself out, sat at the doorstep and quietly wiped his feet with a towel, He could use magic but this was more therapeutic. At last, he calmed down, forgave himself for his stupidity and was ready to embrace the morning.
His name was XZORAMAXIMUS THE THIRD, Max for short, part of a great line of wizards. Max’s father XZORAMAXIMUS THE SECOND just transcended to the second stage of wizard hood life cycle, the invisible phase. His grandfather XZORAMAXIMUS THE FIRST transcended to third stage of wizard hood life cycle, the Solid-Matter phase -he is now the great big purple mountain in the Xalion solar system. XZORAMAXIMUS THE THIRD, known to all as Max is living in a little cabin on a small floating island, somewhere between the deep blue sky where the clouds are resting and earth below. He is extremely busy this morning needing to go & see his grandfather, concerning his fire & lightning spell.
Max stepped outside his little house, stretching his arms breathing in the sweet fresh morning air, basking under the gush of bright sun light.
Just as he was about to reach the edge of the stretch a great deep woody voice broke the silent. “...Lovely day, isn’t it? You finally woke up... I have been awake for ages. I couldn’t sleep from that entire noisy silent”. “Good morning weed” answered the wizard looking into the face of another member of the island, a very unhappy tree “I’m glad to see you on such a pretty day”.
“It’s alright for you” moaned the tree “you are going on all these exciting trips, while I’m left all by myself in this deserted island & another thing this, my name: ‘Weed’, you promised to find me a real name... I’m no longer a sapling, & you did promise that I’ll be named after the long line of wizards trees” the tree’s voice quite down into a sigh “I told you yesterday I had to go & see XZORAMAXIMUS THE THIRD”
The wizard watched as the branches sank in a glum. “pleaseeee don’t goooo, Max” he cried, pleading, shedding great big tears of sap, tightening his branches around the wizard. “Now, now, don’t be sadden, the sooner I’ll go the sooner I’ll return and any way I thought you wanted a name” said the wizard as he patted the tree’s trunk “ watch out not to get your branches tangled up again”. Weed straightened himself, shook the sap of his branches, dried the rest of his tears and wiped his nose “all right than” he said in acceptance.
Our Max walked away from the mourning tree to search for his third companion on the island, the one that likes to web his webs on the rose bush. “Had a busy night I can see” said Max “a bit too busy!, I told you a million times not to let your webs overflow to the clouds” “sh..”, said the spider “don’t make so much noise, my web is just perfect for catching some juicy flies, may be even a mosquito” whispered the spider .
“But this is no good!” Exclaimed the wizard, ignoring the spider request for silent. “Your webs tangled in the clouds surrounding the island, if we don’t remove your webs there’s going to be great friction between the clouds, which means a great thunderstorm”. By now the wizard was mumbling to himself waving his hand about clearing the web “the poor tree is terrified of getting hit by a lighting, what with all these clouds around, and I won’t be here to protect him” his voice became louder again “make sure it won’t happen again!” He ordered the spider & walked back to the house, mumbling to himself something about getting ready to go.
The bird was pecking by the door step, “now... you.. bird” the fowl lifted her head for a moment “I’m going away in a minute, I shall leave the window open so you can come and go as you please, there won’t be any need for you to leave your droppings in, there will also be plenty of food and drinks inside so don’t try to eat the spider”. “Trust me“twitted the bird “I will also try & cheer up the tree till you come” said the bird as she flew up the wizards shoulder. Max smiled at the feathery creature, thinking to himself that at list she and the spider do not worry about their name.
He lowered the bird to the ground “...now the feeding spell”, he walked towards 2 wooden bowls on the floor he held the first in his hand and said. “May this bowl will never empty from the precious liquid of life” a flow of lighting from the wizards hand touched the bowl “let there be water” & the bowl got filled with the freshest water in the world. He then lifted the other bowl “may this bowl will never empty from feathered-creatures food” a flow of red lighting from the wizards hand en-wrapped the bowl “feathered -creatures food” said the wizard to the filled bowl.