Bohdan the Vampire Ripper

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“I still think we should put it to a vote,” Cara said.

“No, they chose you,” Kent said.

“We don’t have to do anything now! The air will last for a while, give the National Guard a chance to save us first.”

Kent looked at the clock on the wall, it was a little after seven o’clock. “I’ll wait till noon tomorrow that is if the air holds out.”

Steve turned around in his chair and looked at the behemoth of a man who was taking control of the pod. “Who elected you president?” Steve asked.

Kent glared at Steve. “Someone had to take charge.”

“You need to give me a chance to figure this out. Giving into the vampire’s demands is the last part of negotiations.”

“What can you do? We’re trapped in here, and the vampires have control of maintenance. The only way out of here is through the front gate which is locked.”

“Or out the tunnels below the prison,” Steve said.

“What’s your plan? To bore through the floor?”

“No, can you be more of a condescending asshole? Give me a chance to think on this. You’re so fucking lazy that you want to give in before you try. Are you one of them?”

Kent didn’t respond, it was if they were onto him.

Bohdan spoke up, “Tell them,” he said.

Steve looked at Bohdan and said, “Tell us what?”

“He’s a vampire.”

Steve looked back at Kent and asked, “Is that right? Are you a vampire?”

Kent stood stoic and didn’t reply.

“If you’re a vampire, why don’t you just walk out the door?”

“I’m not a vampire,” Kent replied. “Yet.”

“What does that mean?”

“I’m planning on becoming a vampire, I just haven’t gone through with it to the end.”

“Is that like getting a tattoo? You just decide to be a vampire one day? And why does Bohdan think you are one?” Steve asked.

“Probably the way I smell, I roleplay as a vampire a lot. I found a way to make myself as much of a vampire as I can,” Kent replied.

Bohdan spoke up, “If that’s so, you do a pretty good job. But I think you’re lying.”

“I’m not lying, I’m as human as everyone else here, except you.”

Paula spoke up, “When he grabbed me, he felt cold.”

“You don’t have to talk about me like I’m not here,” Kent said.

Bohdan replied, “You may be more vampire than you realize.”

“How can that be?”

“You can only be a vampire by birth or being turned by another vampire. I don’t think you were born a vampire, so you must have been turned at some point,” Bohdan replied.

“I don’t know any real vampires, I just roleplay.”

“It’s obvious to me that someone you roleplay with is a vampire. You just didn’t know it.”

Kent stood and thought for a moment. As he pondered what Bohdan said he realized that during roleplay, it was very possible that a real vampire drank of his blood and he didn’t know it. “Shit, that fucking bitch,” Kent said. It was almost under his breath as he realized what happened.

“What are you talking about?” Steve asked.

“Samantha, she might be the one.”

“The one who turned you?”

“Yes, we roleplayed bites all the time, she drew blood more than once,” Kent said. “How much blood does it take before a person turns?”

“Not much,” Bohdan replied. “Just enough to break the skin.”

“Fuck,” Kent said.

Ted spoke up, “Looks like you have a free ticket out of here.”

Kent shook his head. He felt betrayed, like his virginity had been stolen from him.

“Why so glum?” Ted asked. “You got what you wanted.”

“I know, but not like I wanted. I was planning a big ceremony.”

“Sounds like it may have worked in your favor, now you can leave and not worry about being killed. They can’t feed on you.”

Bohdan said, “How long ago did this happen?”

“Three weeks, maybe,” Kent replied.

“And you didn’t notice the changes?”

“I thought I was getting a cold, or the flu,” Kent replied.

“Fever, chills?”

“Yes,” Kent replied.

“But you never took your temperature?”


“Smile at me.”

Kent put his fingers to his canine teeth and felt if they were longer or sharper. They weren’t. “My teeth are the same.”

“They will change eventually,” Bohdan said.

Ted said, “Well, what the fuck are you waiting for? You can leave whenever you want.”

“Yeah, I can leave the pod, but what makes you think they’ll let me out the front door? If it’s locked, I have to hang around a bunch of murderers. I’m still safer in here.”

“You have a point, they may be vampires, but they are all convicted killers first,” Ted replied.

“Until I know I can walk out alive, I’m staying right here,” Kent said.

“What about the demands? For a woman to be sent out?” Ted asked. “Do you still want to do that?”

“Yes, I still think we should send one out. We need to vote.”

Paula spoke up, “Well count me out, I’m not voting.”

“I don’t think the women will vote for each other anyway so let’s have the men vote.”

“I agree,” Bohdan said.

“I’m not voting,” Steve said.

“Me neither,” Ted replied.

Kent spoke up, “That leaves me and Bohdan to vote.”

Cindy said, “No fucking way are you two deciding my fate. Good luck with that.”

“If you’re voted out, I’ll put you out, Bohdan and I will see to that.”

Steve said, “You’ll have to get past me and Ted, as well as the other women first. Don’t think just because you’re three hundred pounds and have the backing of Bohdan that you’ll win.”

“I vote for the nurse,” Kent said. “I think we should give them what they want. What do you think Bohdan?”

“I agree, Cara should go.”

Cara stepped away from Bohdan like she was betrayed. Shaking her head in disgust, she said, “They won’t let you take me.”

“We are two vampires, we have strength no human possesses. When the time comes, you will be removed from here,” Bohdan said.

Cara looked to Steve. “What can you do to help me?”

Steve was a bit shocked that she singled him out for help. He shrugged his shoulders as to say he had no clue.

“You’re the smart one here, think of something. You said we can get out through the tunnels, think of a way to do that.”

“The only way to the tunnels is through the maintenance department, and as you know, they’ve broken in,” Steve replied.

“So?” Cara asked.

“What do you mean so? We’d be exposed if we tried to get to them. It’s a hundred yards past the commons, down a flight of stairs, another hallway to the maintenance door, through the department and another hundred yards to the tunnel entrance. All while trying to avoid any vampires that might be running around in the building.”

“I’d rather try that then let them feed me to those two vampires sitting over there,” Cara said. Isaac and Rancid were both chatting, sitting at a table in the commons area.

“Are you going to ask them to leave so you can try?” Steve asked.

“I’ll wait till they go,” Cara said. “Who wants to go with me?”

No one spoke up. “We need to try to escape, we can’t let them kill us in here. It may seem safe for now, but by tomorrow, we’ll all be dead from carbon monoxide poisoning.”

Paula spoke up, “I’ll take my chances here. The National Guard won’t let us die. I’m sure they’re aware of what’s going on.”

“You stupid bitch, you’ll be dead by morning.”

“He’ll find us air,” Paula said. She looked to Steve for acknowledgement, she got none.

“I can’t guarantee I’ll find a way to get any air in here. The doors are basically air tight, and the pod is sealed in case of tear gas. I’ll work on it, but who knows.”

“I can’t believe they didn’t think of this when they designed the prison!” Ted snapped. “Who runs this place?”

“When New Systems Corrections took over, they spent millions to upgrade the building. This place was built two centuries ago. Who would have thought the guards would ever be trapped in the pods?” Steve asked.

“Someone with some fucking brains! That’s who,” Ted barked. “All they had to do was put in some sort of backup system.”

“Well they didn’t, so now we have to figure this out on our own.”

“How thick is that glass?”

“Three inches,” Steve replied.

“Do you have a drill in here?”

“No, there is a tool kit in each pod, but just the basics. Screwdrivers, a wrench set, stuff like that. All the power drills are back in my department.”

“Can we unscrew a few panels, to let some air in?”

Steve looked at Ted and shook his head. “Don’t you think I would have thought of that? These pods aren’t something someone designed and built in a garage. They are state of the art control pods designed to stand up to a prison riot. You can’t just unscrew a panel, if that were the case, I wouldn’t want the guards to work here. They would be worthless.”

“Fine, is there a way to see if the halls are clear? To the maintenance department? The camera view on the television only shows the commons and part of the hallway.”

“There aren’t cameras in every hall. That isn’t practical. They only put them in places where large groups usually gather,” Steve replied.

“So we can’t tell if the hall is clear? Fucking fantastic. If we take off running, we might run into a shitload of vampires in the hall.”

“Or in the staircase, there are no camera’s there either,” Steve said.

“So this is basically a crapshoot,” Ted said.

“Basically, that’s why we should do what Paula suggested and wait this out.”

Just then Steve noticed Isaac and Rancid approach the pod. They stepped in close and knocked on the stainless steel shell. “Have you decided yet?” Isaac asked.

Steve pressed the communication button. “No, we’re still thinking on it, we’ll get back to you as soon as we know.”

“Can you fucking hurry up?” Isaac asked. He sounded like a coherent version of Ozzy Osbourne. “We don’t have all fucking day.”

“Actually, you do,” Steve said.

Cara approached the glass and flipped Isaac off. “You can fucking go to hell,” she said.

“She’s a feisty one I see,” Isaac said. “I can’t wait to fuck the shit out of her, then drink her blood.”

Cara smiled at Isaac, taunting him. “Why don’t you go fuck your friend there in the ass? He’d like that. I’ve seen what you guys do in here. I know you like it more than you say.”

“No thanks darling, I prefer a nice pussy. I can wait,” Isaac said. And the two vampires walked back to the table and sat back down.

“What a couple of losers,” Cara said.

“They’re inmates, what do you expect?” Steve asked.

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