When Suddenly

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Summary

A megalomaniac forgets his plans of world conquest, then suffers through a wave of bizarre obstacles, winning back his muse with cunning, charm and a little cartoon hole fluid. A true story, I think.

Genre:
Fantasy / Humor
Author:
Dris Horton
Status:
Complete
Chapters:
1
Rating:
4.0 1 review
Age Rating:
13+

Delusions of Granduer

I was entertaining the thought of World Conquest when suddenly, it escaped me.

Upon trying to recapture my thought, I stumbled and fell hitting my head, producing a dull ache and causing my countenance to falter.

Making haste, I pursued my thought through neighboring hoods of previous ideas when suddenly, I was waylaid by a band of obtuse ruffians, causing the dull ache in my head to become more or less pronounced, and my countenance to falter further still.

I was just about done for when suddenly, I remembered my trusty pistol-gun, (a Quasar 3000 $apfire, its plutonium @t!as microchip sheathed in a cobalt casing), and shot the callous ne’er-do-wells dead in the face of reason.

Ah, sweet relief. (Paid a ten-thousand quid-blips for that baby. 'Bout time she was used for something other than lighting mojo-snippets and searing rat dragons.)

Now, where was I? Ah, yes. Seeking building permits for my castles in the sky.

With verve and pomp, I stepped over the nonentity obstacles just in time to glimpse my thought of Global Domination crossing the Toll Bridge to Nowhere, and quickly made chase.

I whipped out a crisp fiver and tossed it in the toll bridge bucket box but the pencil-necked attendant with the small-man-complex said, “That’ll be five o’one.”

“NONSENSE!!” I cried and hurtled the guardrail to the Toll Bridge to Nowhere.

Whistles blew and jackboots hit the pavement as a band of kaleidoscopic pig sergeants made chase.

I was just about to give the holographic B-siders the slip when suddenly, a mirror bird swooped down demanding to see my passport-voucher from the Land of Somewhere.

Without breaking stride, I produced my document-papers to the wily warbler, which he quickly validated with his sharp beak-point and double-plussed me with complimentary bottle of cartoon hole fluid. Acme brand, the best.

After rounding a tight corner-bend, I stopped and poured a generous portion of the loony elixir right in the middle of the road.

Ah, how grand it is watching kaleidoscopic pig sergeants fall to oblivion through a freshly poured cartoon-hole. Their nothing but mirrors and beads, you know?

I was just switching on my titanium rust oxide turbo chargers when suddenly, I spied my connotation of World Order reclining under the spreading boughs of an iconoclast tree, not too far from the deep end of the gene pool.

Feigning devil-may-care I crept up on my muse of Planetary Take Over, coaxing her back in my arms with a one-way ticket on the High Noon Train to Pandemonium Ville where we plan to dine on crow, (with Space Ghost and Marlon Brando), then catch the Sunday-Bloody-Sunday matinee showing of Apocalypse Soon

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Further Recommendations

cadin deane: Good book cant wait to read more of your stories!

faiz Kazmi: Such a beautiful story.... (Sighing while revising the story again) ...

Corrina Chalklen: I love your work and wait with bated breath for each update!!

Victoria Barnett: A very awesome story. Please send us test of story when you can.

tracys1: Great story, can't wait to see where it goes next

Jazmin Rogers: It’s a short book but it doesn’t feel like it’s rushed, I felt so much emotion from this book, from crying to being happy and being so frustrated. You’re an amazing writer! Really liked this story

Alex Lobato (Mrsarm3dmilitia): Love this book! Wish there was more!

shelbylynmarie23: I love this book this is amazing

More Recommendations

Laura Lawrenson: Fantastic book, I read the vampire kisses books first and when I started reading this I wasnt sure at first but it got so much better. I loved the character of Andre and his vampire, I wish Broderick could have been in it more

Alison Schofield: So far so good

Emily Schuchardt: Good start to the book. Alot of backstory so far. Hoping it spices up in the coming chapters.

Candi Kevin: Hope there will be more to read

Pamela J Atchley: Wishing that there was more to read

Denise Frazier: I love the first chapter. I am looking forward to reading more. The author had me on the edge of my seat. Ready to read more. Thank you.

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