The sun was about to go down and to be honest, I know that I should fly back to Charlies. I look around sighing, I didn’t even know if there was a path down to this beach as no one had come here all day and on the last day of the summer break it made little sense for the beach to be empty.
“What the fuck.” Someone says snapping me out of my own daydreams, I look up at a guy coming out of the ocean. Come on really wasn’t I going to meet a single girl in this town?
“What?” I snap at him, as he stares at me.
“How the fuck did you get here?” he questions me.
“I ran.” I shrug.
“What and jumped off a fucking cliff there’s no path down here,” the guy informs me, okay so that was why no one had come.
“Then how did you get down here?” I question.
“I swam.” He says looking like he is dodging that question too. He is wet through and did come from the ocean so maybe he had swum here.
“I better go get the coast guard and tell them so they can get the boat to come to get you.” He says worriedly. really what was with the guys in this bloody town and there worry about a stranger?
“Na that’s fine. I think I just want to stay here.” I say looking away from the guy and out to the ocean.
“Yeah it gets really cold at night here,” he informs me throwing himself onto the sand next to me. really? doe’s something about me say come talk to me? I need to get my leave me the hell alone vibe back and soon.
“Maybe I could swim back with you,” I say shrugging.
“Who says I’m not in shape,” I tell him shrugging.
“Yeah believe me you couldn’t swim those waves and that riptide.” He tells me firmly.
“You think I’m weak compared to you?” I question.
“I know you’re a weak swimmer compared to me,” he informs me a matter of factly. The thing is I know it is true, secretly because I don’t know how to swim. Mom hadn’t felt that there was a need for lessons. I think she was slightly scared of water, well no I know she was scared of water, but I never was told why except spells across the water is some of the hardest magic and that water like fire is very uncontrollable. Well her exact words were
‘water is harder to control than fire.’
“What about this you go first, don’t bother about the coast guard and I will get myself off,” I say.
“That doesn’t work for me,” he informs me.
“I still can’t work out how you got here,” he says looking around as if there might be signs.
“I told you I ran,” I tell him.
“Yeah and jumped off a cliff?” He questions me. I look at the cliff, I could rock climb that easily.
“I’m a rock climber,” I say.
“Without any equipment?” he questions.
“No one said I was a sensible rock climber.” I shrug. My phone starts ringing then because I can’t just deal with one thing at once! I look at it Charlie’s name flashes on the screen.
“Boyfriend?” the guy questions me, looking at my cell himself.
“No,” I say.
“Are you going to answer him?” he asks me.
“Yeah, no, I don’t know.” I sigh knowing it would be the best if I did but I didn’t want to.
“Hey,” I say into the phone answering it on the last ring.
“Sophia where the hell are you, the sun is about to set and you have school in the morning and we have yet to go over the rules for school.” my dad says I can tell he’s cross and frustrated.
“Rules?” I question in disbelief.
“Yes Rules, I think we are going to have to set some. Because you disappearing all day has got to stop.” Charlie says so firmly.
“Charles I do not understand why you suddenly care what I do. But I will be at your home soon, I am just sat on the beach contemplating my new life and the destruction of my previous.” I say calmly, my voice seems rather robotic I fully admit I am trying not to scream at him.
“Sophia,” Charlie says worriedly.
“Charles want to know the truth? So my boyfriend of 2 years, who I broke up with last week, already has a new girlfriend and is telling everyone we broke up because I’m crap in bed and there are rumors going around my old school that I got knocked up.” I say exasperated.
“My new stepbrother and don’t even try to pretend he isn’t going to be I know you have the ring to propose to her and you love her so just get it over with. Well, my new stepbrother thinks I’m a bitch. Hes right though because I am a bitch.” I say looking at the guy who was pretending not to be listening and is now laying back on the sand looking up at the sky, obviously trying not to laugh.
“Sophia,” Charlie says I can hear hes on the edge of losing it.
“On top of all that I’m lost,” I admit.
“I have two options as I’m not alone here I either swim off this beach. Which would be ridiculously fun and a stupid idea because guess what. I’ve never been swimming in my life.” I say.
“I used to take you swimming all the time,” Charlie says but it’s quiet and he says it worriedly.
“Well, I can’t remember that Charles. I can barely remember you.” I snap at him. I was 3! did he really expect me to have memories of him? yeah, you have to be around more than he was for that!
“You want me to be this girl that I can’t be. All I want is my Mom.” I say tears coming again.
“I just want my life back how it was. I want to go home and have Mom in the kitchen laughing with one of her friends over the latest book from the book club.” I inform him tears running down my face. Yes, strangely my mom was in a book club and she loved every minute of it, especially when they got a dirty book.
“I want to go out with my friends and boyfriend and yeah I know they would all stab me straight in the back, but I was a part of the group and they enjoyed hanging out with me,” I say because yeah that’s how I used to feel.
“I want to feel a part of a fucking team that I know needs me.” I snap at him.
“Sophia,” Charlie says sounding like this was the talk he had been waiting on, but I can’t get his feelings on the phone and I think he knows that.
“We should talk in person,” he says almost encouragingly.
“Where are you and I will come?” he asks me.
“Where are we?” I ask the guy.
“Dead man’s beach.” The guy says calmly still looking up at the sky, rather than me and he isn’t smiling anymore. I look at him with a raised eyebrow.
“Apparently dead man’s beach,” I say into the phone. He must be pulling my leg, who really would call a beach that. or was that just what the locals call it?
“For fuck’s sake Sophia how the fucking hell did you get there!” Charlie says.
“Woo Charlie, did you just swear?” I question in disbelief.
“Sophia I am going to have to call the coast guard to rescue you both now.” Charlie snaps.
“No you don’t dude worst happens I can get the guy up,” I say rolling my eyes. “
How did you even get on that fucking beach!” Charlie snaps.
“I am a bitch Charlie, me and my flying monkeys flew here,” I say rolling my eyes, not that Charlie can see. The guy next to me laughs I think he couldn’t help it or he agreed with the bitch thing without knowing me.
“YOU FLEW DURING DAYLIGHT,” Charlie yells at me.
“Yes, I ran and saw a cliff so jumped off it and flew but don’t worry no one saw me and if someone hadn’t come to this beach no one would ever of known,” I say rolling my eyes, fully aware he can’t see me.
“I will be at your home soon, did you want me to get dinner from anywhere first?” I ask.
“SOPHRONIA LAVENDER TEMPEST-DAVIES,” Charlie yells at me, wow I had succeeded in making him yell at me this quickly? Not just that he had resorted to full name. I was on a roll it normally took hours to get mom to this point. or breaking curfew. or that time I stole her toenail whilst she was sleeping and woke her.
“Charles?” I say deadly serious, trying not to laugh.
“Wipe the boy’s mind and just fly off the beach but don’t leave him on It.” Charlie sighs obviously trying to calm his anger, hmm he knows more about my magic than I realized.
“Oh no, I was just going to leave the guy on a beach that is apparently impossible to get off,” I say rolling my eyes again. The guy was laughing his head off next to me.
“Bye Charlie,” I say and I hang up the call, I will eventually have to deal with him, but what’s the worst he can do? Ground me? I had nowhere to go around here! and if I wanted something enough he couldn’t stop me.
“Come on who the hell was that?” the guy asks me laughing as I throw my phone onto the sand and throw myself backwards so I’m laying on the sand next to him.
“My dad,” I say with a weak smile at the guys laid back demeanor.
“You call your dad his first name that’s cold.” The guy says said not laughing as much.
“He really doesn’t deserve me to call him dad. But no one seems to understand that.” I sigh.
“What he do princess forget your birthday?” he asks me laughing again.
“Yeah and not just one, he pretty much forgot I existed until this year,” I say, voicing how I feel. why does no one get that? He left when I was 3 and I’ve hardly seen him since. I’m 17 thats 14 years of him being a deadbeat. The guy stops laughing.
“Oh sorry,” he says, looking like he really means that. I shrug.
“Hes trying now though.” the guy points out.
“Everyone keeps saying that and it’s not helping. Yeah, he’s trying now but where has he been the last 17 years! He’s only trying now because Moms dead. The number of times that man’s let me down I can’t even count that high. Yet I’m being the bitch because I won’t let him close to me. Doesn’t anyone realize hes hurt me and let me down too much in the past for me to ever want to let him get close enough to me to do it again.” I say wow I didn’t plan to ever voice that out loud.
“I suppose I can understand that you feel like he’s only bothering with you now because he has to, not because he wants to,” the guy says weakly. I nod.
“I know I’m being a bitch but he never wanted me before so why pretend he wants me now for the sake of a year, he could have just let me move in with my friend for a year,” I say.
“Maybe he thought it was his shot, maybe hes regretted the past 17 years and wants a shot to get to know you?” he asks.
“I don’t know but even if he does I don’t want to risk getting hurt,” I admit to him. Why was I telling him how I felt, oh yeah because I was going to wipe his mind.
“I’m Caspian.” The guy says holding his hand out to me.
“I’m Sophie,” I say shaking his hand laughing.
“So you’re new here?” he questions me.
“Yeah,” I admit.
“Same.” He says.
“Really?” I question him.
“Yeah moved to the area the beginning of the summer decided to have a few years around here, you’re my first new local friend.” He says laughing.
“Hey hold up who said we were friends?” I question him laughing, he’s not going to remember me after all.
“The flying monkeys.” He tells me with a grin that lights up his whole face, He is rather cute but there’s something about him that is unlike most guys I’ve met. He is so pale as if he’s hardly ever seen the sun, his hair is long and curly and dyed green, so is his beard that doesn’t suit his face shape. He’s got a nice six-pack though.
“Really? I should have a talk with them.” I say laughing. He is taking all this in his stride.
“So this is going to sound really weird and if it does it will answer my own question.” He says seriously. I look at him waiting.
“You flew?” he asks me deadly serious looking me in the eyes with his own aqua blue irises, that seem to hold me into place.
“On my broomstick.” I shrug, I’m going to wipe his mind anyway.
“Okay so you’re a witch not a bitch got it,” he says laughing.
“Oh, and what are you then as there’s no way a mundane guy like you could swim those waves they would tear you to shreds,” I say realizing looking at the waves, there was no way I was swimming out of here, or letting him.
“I really did swim.” He laughs looking at the aggressive ocean.
“But I ain’t mundane witchy.” He says laughing. “You’re a merman,” I say realizing what this is and laughing.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sophie, here I was thinking my first year on land outside of school was going to be boring,” he says with a grin. I laugh more.
“Please tell me your starting high school tomorrow Caspian,” I say smiling. “I didn’t plan to but now I think I will have to make that happen.” He laughs. “Why aren’t you at Websiams?” He questions me laughing.
“Mom home educated me and I have technically graduated witch school,” I admit to him.
“How old are you?” I ask him. “24. You?” he asks me with a grin.
“17.” I laugh, I’m not that much younger than him, even if he’s going to live for hundreds of years.
“Hmm that might be a small problem.” he laughs.
“Na we have magic, I can sort it out. you look young” I shrug kind of praying he would come now, I need someone magical in my corner. I should have suggested to Aunt Beaty the witch boarding school.
“Do you think I will get away with high school student?” he questions me standing up and flexing his muscles. I try not to laugh maybe sometime in the sun will do him some good.
“Yeah why not just shave,” I tell him, what is with the guys in this town and their ideas of clothes? He laughs,
“I can cope with that, I think,” he says as if he’s thinking it through thoughtfully but the smile on his lips gives it away that he’s joking.
“I better go then as I now have school tomorrow.” He laughs.
“Oh, I better say this in case things get awkward.” He says going deadly serious.
“What?” I question this was what had made this awkward.
“I know you and your boyfriend just broke up,” he says nervously.
“Dude don’t flirt me if you want us to be friends,” I say deadly serious and I mean it. I’m not interested. I wasn’t ready for that with anyone. two years with Justin was long enough for me to know, I needed some time alone.
“I’m not into interspecies relationships. I’m happily dating a mermaid who is currently in the Caribbean you just have the wrong parts for me,” he says looking me up and down.
“Fair enough you got the wrong parts for me too.” I laugh.
“You sure you can get yourself off witchy?” he asks me laughing easing the awkwardness that has fallen between the two of us.
“Positive fish boy,” I tell him standing up and holding my broom a second later. I climb onto my broom and start slowly rising.
“Invisible idiot.” He yells at me smiling still though
“I am you can only see me because your magical, it stops witches crashing in the sky,” I say he laughs and he runs into the ocean. A tail rises a second later. I laugh as I ride my broom all the way back to Charlies.
Charlie was stood talking to the woman next door on the front drive when I arrive. I know she must be his girlfriend and the boy’s mom.
“I don’t know Sarah.” He sighs looking tired.
“She’s angry, you’re angry the best thing you both can do tonight Charlie is both not talk about it,” she tells him running her hand over his arm at what must be her trying to comfort him. Ha, I like her idea.
“But she has run off all day!” Charlie says in exasperation.
“She’s 17 she’s a teenager, Charlie, you work with hundreds of them, she can’t be any worse than any of your students,” Sarah says to him.
‘Wanna bet.’ I was tempted to tell her.
“Sophia she’s just well she’s different,” Charlie sighs.
“Honey let her settle down, don’t try to force yourself on her,” Sarah tells him sighing. I decide I can’t just appear in the house when they have been watching out for me. So I go and land where no one can see me. where I feel safe to land and turn visible.
“You have 27 hours remaining until full license.” My broom tells me, in almost a robotic voice, how I’ve missed my broom.
“Thank you,” I say to it then shrink it to the size of a small pen. It looks like a pen and would work as one if I needed it to. I then walk the rest of the way back to the house, Charlie is back inside when I get there. good, I don’t have to face him in front of his girlfriend. I walk up to the door and knock. This really is never going to feel like it’s my home.
“Sophia,” Charlie says throwing open the door.
“Hey,” I say.
“Hey? HEY?” He demands. Wow, how could someone make one word sound so angry?
“Where the hell have you been!” he yells at me.
“About.” I shrug.
“ABOUT!” he yells. He obviously didn’t listen to his girlfriend.
“Yeah about.” I shrug annoyed, I shouldn’t have to justify myself I’m 17, I’m not a little kid. If I was year older I wouldn’t need to be here.
“Go to your room Sophia.” He shouts at me.
“If I wanted to go to my room Charles I would have to go back to Texas,” I yell back at him but I storm past him into the house and towards the room he has assigned me.
“You listen here young lady this might of worked with your mother.” He starts firmly.
“I HATE YOU, HOW DARE YOU BRING MOM INTO THIS,” I yell at him. I slam my new bedroom door in his face, and I send magic to keep it shut. He touches the door handle, obviously to come in.
“FUCK.” He yells as I hear the zap, I hadn’t meant to charge it as much as I had. but who cared, a little electric shock won’t hurt him.
“Sophronia.” He yells at me, banging on the door. I can’t deal with him. I can’t last a year with him.
“I HATE YOU,” I yell at him. I pick up my broom.
“Your license does not allow flights past sunset on nights of the crescent moon. Your broom has been locked by Beatrice Tempest-Knight, if you wish to ride please get permission from a guardian.” My broom says firmly. Really my Aunt has locked my broom? where is the trust, Aunt Beaty?
I hear the front doorbell go, just as I open the bedroom window ready to go. I can’t hear what is being talked about, but I can hear my dads voice.
I put my music on. Stupid girl by Pink is as loud as I can physically go on my player. Hey, he was lucky I hadn’t put on because of you. The door is banged but I ignore him as he shouts.
I send my magic to my player making it to as loud as I can physically take, then I do it I send because of you by Kelly Clarkson to the player and make it almost ear shattering for me in my room. I felt every single word she sung in my heart it was all true, how could I ever trust anyone to accept me for who I was when my own father couldn’t accept me? Once the song finishes, I send Bitch by Meredith Brooks to it. Then Taylor Swifts We are never getting back together come on automatically because somehow we had gone onto my breakup mix, that I played last time Jacob and I had a huge fight. I throw myself back on my bed pillow over my head and scream into it. Then Demi Lovato’s version of let it go, comes on. I sit up and throw a few things into my backpack that I will need for the evening and then I go and jump out my bedroom window. So what I can’t fly tonight doesn’t mean I can’t fucking run away. I can hitchhike and get to Abe's college as he's closest. then he can fly me over to England when the moons full. As I leave the backyard via the back gate I hear my music switch to Avril Lavigne run away. the perfect song for this I walk down the street. when I can no longer hear my own music I let out my breath I hadn't even realized I was holding. I decide the only thing I can do right send a messenger bird to Abe to see if he can come to pick me up.
Tweet to Abe Lawson – Can you come pick me up? I want to leave now. – Tweet from Sophie Tempest.
I look up at the sky and kind of did a signal for a mail bird to come collect my post, one came it was an owl, how harry potter of the world, especially as I am still in the harry potter shorts and top, yes I'm cold now. I tie the letter to its leg and it takes off. I wander down the street not really sure where I'm actually going, but I know I passed a McDonalds this morning and it was close enough to the house to walk to. It should still be open and I'm hungry.
I manage to find the McDonalds I go in and ordered a meal. I sit and eat it at a sticky table. by now I'm regretting leaving. This isn’t me, I'm not someone who gives up on something because it is hard. I dip my fries into my milkshake and think about how I'm really not helping myself out here. I have acted exactly like a hormonal teenager and not the sensible witch that my mother has trained me to be. I look at the burger in front of me, I don’t want it anymore. I should go back to Charlies and say sorry. I look at the time and it's only 8.42pm, it isn’t that late but at the same time what could have my day been like with Charlie if I had given him a shot this morning? I sigh and put my head into my hands regretting everything of today. I should go back and apologize. But I should finish this meal because I haven’t eaten anything today and I was hungry until the guilt started building up inside of me. Nope, I can’t eat it, the guilt is making my stomach in knots. I pack my food all back into the brown McDonalds bag and grab my drink. I then walk out.
I start walking back the way I had come from, it was easier to tell now, when I had paid attention when coming. I see a truck drive past me that I kind of recognize a few minutes later. It turns around and then pulls in at kind of a hazard in front of me. it is almost like the owner of the truck just can’t be bothered to learn to park and decides the whole world can put up with his asshole parking ways. he is possibly that ass that will park the most annoying in a carpark, taking up two spaces. By the time I get to the truck both He and Justin are stood outside of it leaning on the truck. why did I have a feeling it was me they were waiting on? Maybe the matching looks on both their faces as they stand there, glaring at me like I'm in trouble. I turn around and start walking in the opposite direction, I don't have to deal with them. they are Charlie's problem, not mine.
“Don’t even think about it Sophia we have already seen you,” Justin says in a voice that just doesn’t sound right coming from him. every time I've seen Justin he's been happy and playful if slightly worried, but that voice was pure cross and frustration.
“Come on he can’t have even realized I was gone that quickly, he can’t of got in the room yet,” I say.
“Yeah and he still hasn’t realized according to Nathan,” Justin says his arms crossed over his body.
“Then how did you?” I question peed off, why can't they stay out of my business?
“You’re not that sneaky jumping out your bedroom window,” Blake informs me.
“Note taken for next time I sneak out,” I say rolling my eyes, are they going to tell on me? they can't possibly make my relationship with my father worse. I pull a fry out of my brown bag.
“Fry?” I ask them both. Blake actually takes a handful, he shrugs at Justin. Who shakes his head obviously frustrated, it really doesn't suit him.
“You know Nathan didn’t mean to upset you earlier,” Justin tells me, looking at me worriedly like he doesn't want me to play his younger brother for all of this. I shrug.
“It's fine he didn’t.” I lie, it wasn't just him, he was just too much at once.
“Should we get you back before Mr. D's before he realizes you've snuck out and you get into more trouble,” Justin says looking at me, like hes torn on what to say to me.
“I think I’m already in a lot of shit for my music, especially if it’s still playing as loud,” I point out.
“No Nathan turned it off when we threw him into your window before following you,” Blake says truthfully.
“So Nathans in my room?” I ask in disbelief. What the hell!
“Alone, I bet hes trying to find your Diary too as we speak,” Justin informs me a smile on his lips, calming down and the light going back into his eyes, being serious doesn't Justin and wheres his ugly bandana? He's still got his hair in a bun though in a bright green scrunchie.
“Can we go now?” I ask worried, thinking of all the things in my room, I wouldn't want them to see.
“What don’t want to run away now?” Blake asks me his arms are still crossed over his body but least he has a small upturn of his lips, they don't reach his eyes and he's looking at my McDonalds bag rather than me.
“I kind of realized I have no way out of here, what with my aunt now in England,” I say truthfully.
“I doubt they will let me on a plane without a passport,” I say thinking about it.
“I think you do kind of need one of those, and a ticket” Justin informs me looking me over as if trying to work out if I'm okay.
“Do you know how unsafe it is to walk around a town you don’t know alone at night?” Blake questions me firmly out of what feels like nowhere. Do I look like I'm not able to look after myself?
“Pretty much the same it is everywhere.” I shrug at him.
“Yet you still did it,” Blake questions me firmly.
“Dude I’m a red belt in Karate and a purple belt in mixed martial arts. I am more than capable of looking after myself. have done for years” I say to him. “Not a black belt.” Blake points out.
“Not able to protect yourself if someone picked you up.” Justin points out, taking a few steps towards me, nope no. not happening.
“I went to McDonald's. I didn’t go that far, if I was trying to get in trouble I would have attempted to walk to my friend’s college.” I point out.
“Is she at the one in town?” Justin asks me.
“Nope, she’s a few hours away, but Abe’s closer,” I say shrugging.
“Neither are in town though,” I admit.
“Well next time you think you’re running away arrange someone to supervise you better,” Blake says firmly.
“So let me guess Mr. D and you had a huge argument,” Blake questions.
“I’m not sure,” I admit, I know I had blown it out of proportion.
“In you get let’s get you back home you've got school in the morning,” Justin says opening the truck door.
“It’s a long drive home,” I mumble, but I climb into the back of the truck.
“How old were you when your parents divorced?” Blake asks me heading Justin off on what he must have been about to say.
“Three,” I admit.
“How often did you see him?” Justin asks me worriedly.
“Hardly ever,” I say shrugging trying to pretend it doesn’t hurt.
“How old were you last time you saw him?” Justin asks me sounding so torn.
“Last time I saw my dad before this?” I ask.
“Yeah?” Justin questions me, he wants to like my dad but somethings not right with this and he knows it.
“My Moms funeral,” I admit.
“I'm sorry for your loss. I know it must be hard,” Justin says, looking back at me with worry from where hes now sitting in the front seat. Blake in the drives seat pulls out, I hold on tightly to the suicide rail. cars still freak me out. but surely I can cope with being in a car.
“Thanks,” I say not sure what else to say.
“When did you see Mr. D before that?” Blake asks me, interested. “I think I was about 11, I know it was after my 11th birthday but not by much,” I say thoughtfully.
“I can’t really remember that much of his last visit.” I shrug trying to downplay my lack of memories to do with my father.
“So it’s been 6 years not including the funeral?” Blake asks me.
“Yeah and even before that I rarely saw the man.” I shrug.
“So what you think hes only taken you in because he had to?” Blake questions me, wow how had he put his finger on it straight away. I shrug, I know it is the case.
“It doesn’t matter what I think obviously,” I say.
“No it does because I get it, you think hes only there for you now because he has to be. That he didn’t want you before and now you feel your old enough and able to look after yourself he suddenly wants to play happy family.” Blake says.
“It wasn’t his fault,” I say, I didn’t want Justin not to like him.
“Wasn’t it?” Blake asks me looking at me via his mirror, he has an understanding look on his face.
“He tried a few times after but each time I would have plans.” I shrug, he always would say okay no problem maybe another time. But he had tried a few times these last 6 years, but not enough and when I wanted him to come and said yes, he would let me down.
“So what you think it’s your fault?” Blake questions me.
“Your parents divorced each other they didn’t divorce you,” Blake says.
“You really wouldn’t understand,” I say no one would.
“Oh really?” Justin questions me.
“Because my own parents haven’t divorced, because I don’t have a dad I rarely see,” Justin questions me. I look at the back of his head.
“Yeah Mr. D is trying and I get what Nathan was trying to say to you earlier. that your dad is at least trying but you’re throwing it straight in his face. But I really get what you were trying to say. Hes trying now, but he hasn’t tried before and where has he been the last few years.” Justin says turning in his seat to look at me, a pure face of understanding reaches me, he did get it.
“You’re hurt because you can’t work out if your dads trying because he wants to try or because he has to,” Blake says.
“Hes a good teacher but hes never been there for his own kid, that must be the knife in an already deep wound,” Blake says.
“He didn’t really get much of a chance to, mom did move us to another state after the divorce when he had just qualified to be a teacher here and got his first teaching job,” I say under my breath, not sure why I'm coming to my dad's defense.
“I don’t get it, you’re trying to give him excuses, but you know you’re trying to,” Blake questions me.
“He was so young when I was born, he and mom weren’t ready to have kids,” I say knowing it to be the case.
“What and now hes suddenly ready?” Justin questions me.
“He loves you and Nathan, Justin,” I say.
“Yet you don’t think he loves you?” Justin asks me. I stay silent, no I don't think he loves me. I don't think he could ever love me.
“Sophia the day you were in that car accident, that week that followed, I have never seen someone so worried so sick with worry as he was, he didn’t even go more a foot away from the phone. He was so worried he would miss something.” Justin tells me.
“Then why didn’t he come?” I ask, that had hurt as well. he knew I was in a car accident, he knew my mom was in a coma yet he hadn’t come to the hospital.
“What do you mean why didn’t he come?” Justin questions me.
“I was in the hospital for 2 and a half weeks, why didn’t he come?” I ask.
“You said you didn’t want him too, he was all packed to go and then you said you didn’t want him there,” Justin says.
“He was trying to accept your wishes.” Justin snaps at me. I laugh I couldn’t help it, was that his excuse? blame it on me?
“you didn’t say that did you?” Blake asks suddenly realizing that my laugh wasn't because it was funny, it was pure disbelief.
“I was unconscious for 2 days, if he had wanted to come, he would have been there before I gained consciousness. I might have told him I didn’t want him when I woke up, but I never talked to him. I was just expected to deal with my mom being in a coma and not likely to wake up alone. I was just expected to say goodbye to her as they turned off her life support off.” I tell him trying not to cry.
“My aunt managed to get all the way from England to be next to me for when I woke up, it took her 25 hours to get here because she couldn't get a connecting flight so last minute,” I say, my Aunt who hates flying!
“He was 22 when I was born. He was still in college. Mom and I were just a mistake.” I say shrugging. Blake pulled in and parked up outside Justin's house.
“I don’t blame him for not wanting us,” I say shrugging, but thats not really how I feel. I do blame him for not excepting that I was different.
“I don’t blame him for wanting a family now he is ready,” I say.
“But nor am I going to lie to myself and pretend he wants me, because I know I’m nothing more than a mistake to him,” I say.
I open the door and jump out of the truck then. I walk back through the back gate, ignoring Justin and Blake. I then go to where my bedroom window is and calmly pull myself up and back into my bedroom via my window. Nathan is laid on my bed Reading one of my books from the shelves I had put up, he doesn't even look up when I'm in.
“You can borrow that if you want.” I shrug at him. He looks up and takes me in.
“I’m sorry,” he says.
“Don’t be, you said how you felt. How could I be mad at your feelings, just because I don’t agree with them.” I say.
“Alright then,” he says looking at me confused.
“Night,” he says.
“Night,” I tell him.
“See you at school tomorrow.” He says. I nod, knowing I had no choice but to go to this school. Nathan went and climbed out of my bedroom window. When he is out I shut the window then the blackout blinds and then I shut the curtains. I then wave my hand slowly and changed into my PJs almost instantly. I climb into bed and lay down in my bed, hopefully, tomorrow will be better. Yeah pigs can fly.