I sigh looking at my clock as I wake up, it is only 4 am, I have spent most the night tossing and turning because I feel like crap from my argument with Charlie last night, when we got back home. he had blown up at me for using my magic on Sarah. What I don’t get is how with the fact I had used my magic to stop an argument that it turned into a huge argument. He also yelled at me for pre-med, because apparently with my powers I shouldn’t be doing that sort of thing. that it's not right to mix healthcare with my magic! weren't most doctors and healers believed to use witchcraft at one point in history? Pre-med feels like going back to magic roots. I yelled at him for what felt like forever making sure that there was a sound barrier up around the house. I was really tempted to run away again. Then a messenger bird from Abe with details for Saturday had arrived which seemed to be the icing on the cake for Charlie and to me, it was the final sign I needed. This man had never accepted me and never would. He was angrier for the fact I wasn’t a normal girl than he actually cared to get to know me. He was angrier that I was different than I felt about him, not excepting me. He blamed my mother for not being normal. He was mad at me for being me. He wanted me to deny who I was so much I knew that wasn’t what he was saying. But couldn’t he see I could see the under conversation and I would prefer him physically hitting me than another minute knowing I would never make that man happy. I tried to take my broom out but it told me it had been locked on nights of moon crescents. It was all a pain in the ass.
So that brings me to 4 am where I'm at my snapping point. I give up on the attempt to sleep and get out of bed. I wave my hands, it is early so it will be chilly. Light pink yoga pants and a light grey long-sleeve exercise top settles on me and then I sneak out for a run. Plugging myself into my headphones the moment my feet hits the concrete. I did at least grab a water bottle this time. I even grabbed my yoga matt. before I ran for the life I want. jogging down the street in the direction of the beach. When I get to the edge of the cliff I call my broom to me, It does allow me to fly down at least. The moment I hit the sand I set up my private calming system. Then I get to work doing my yoga routine on the beach calming myself and breathing in the salty air.
I'm aware the moment Caspian arrives. He sits in the ocean watching me from the distance silently as I do my next few movements.
“Are you going to try out for cheerleading?” he asks me after a while walking onto the shore.
“No,” I tell him, just that one word, but I doubt he will understand why.
“Why not you're good,” Caspian tells me.
“Don’t worry I'm just not going to,” I tell him feeling defeated.
“So what happened to make you sad?” he asks me, sinking to the sand next to me. “How do you know I'm sad?” I ask.
“Saltwater is leaking from your eyes,” he tells me a matter of factly.
“How do you cry underwater?” I question him.
“our eyes kind of glow but you're changing the subject.”
“I had a fight with my sperm donor,” I mumble.
“Why are you having a fight with a whale?” he questions me a smile on his face at his own joke. I give him a confused look until I roll my eyes getting it. sperm whale.
“So what you fight about?” he asks me, sounding interested.
“Me using my magic,” I admit.
“Did you blow something up?” Caspian asks me sounding interested.
“No,” I tell him, I have slightly better control than that, not that I can't feel everything inside me ready to explode.
“Did you set anyone on fire?” Caspian asks calmly.
“No,” I tell him.
“Did anyone notice your magic?” he asks me.
“No,” I tell him.
“Did anyone get hurt?” he asks.
“No.” I sigh.
“Did you break any laws?” Caspian asks me.
“No,” I tell him with a weak smile, what kind of witch does he think I am?
“Then hes just being an idiot Fee,” Caspian tells me.
“Hes never going to except me Caspian, he made that so clear last night,” I say looking at the ocean wishing I was like him and could just swim away.
“Then why did he want you here?” Caspian asks me.
“I don’t know, I don’t think even he does.” I sigh.
“What does this tell you,” he asks me pointing at my heart.
“That you are more in touch with your feelings than I am,” I tell Caspian. Caspian laughs.
“I see the under conversation how hes feeling and he really doesn’t like me.” I sigh.
“Then stop seeing the under conversations and concentrate on the conversation your having,” Caspian tells me shrugging.
“If the worst happens and he never excepts you, you can leave in a few months. then the summer you can do a spell to give yourself gills and we can explore the ocean.” He tells me.
“Um, I can't even swim,” I inform Caspian.
“First I teach you how to swim.” He says nudging my shoulder. I laugh.
“What about school?” I ask him. He shuffles.
“you can't can you?” I question sighing in disappointment.
“It was a really long time out the ocean Witchy.” He mumbles. I nod, I get it.
“I will come to drop out,” he mumbles looking at his hands.
“it's okay I will drop you out, with magic,” I tell him.
“Na it's fine I will come physically do it. I can wipe my complete existence from everyone's minds then,” he tells me.
“Powerful merman aren’t you,” I say.
“Your just a baby witchy.” He tells me.
“You're still a witchling.” He says with an encouraging smile.
“Don’t rub it in that your older,” I tell him. My phone starts ringing, I look at it wishing that I could just reverse time.
“Dad?” Caspian asks me.
“Yeah,” I tell him looking at it like I can change it.
“Go Sophia and remember to be in the actual conversation with your father, not the under.” He tells me encouragingly.
“Also turning your father into a frog isn’t against any of the laws,” Caspian tells me. I laugh as I stand up and brush the sand of my yoga matt.
“Sophia, can you do please me clothes?” Caspian asks me indicating what he's wearing, well more of a case of not wearing. I look around and know that no one will see. I wave my hand and he suddenly has swim trunks, a baggy top and some sandals on.
“Thanks,” Caspian tells me.
“Your welcome,” I tell him weakly clothes is nothing big at all.
“See you at school later Witchy, do you want me to sort out last night for you.” He asks me looking at me with worry. How did I get so close to him so quickly? I nod and leave after saying
“I wish you could.”
on my way back I pass paperboy. He is biking down my new street again throwing papers. I stop and watch him. he takes me in with my yoga matt.
“What is your problem?” he snaps at me. there has been something about you from the moment I met you and I can't place it.
“Nothing,” I tell him. I go to walk past him as he chucked a paper that lands with surprisingly good aim.
“Don’t you think it’s a bit too early to bother your boyfriend.” He smirks at me.
“Who?” I ask him, I didn’t know why but I kind of get in his way.
“You heard me, Nathan or Justin or Blake whichever guy you're fucking to try to be a popular little bitch.” He sneers at me. Woo, where the hell was this acid coming from? He didn't know me. I go to comment, but Justin comes running down the road.
“Sophia wait up,” Justin yells.
“Oh look here comes your boyfriend.” Des sneers at me.
“Hey, Soph. Hey, Des long time.” Justin says calmly had he heard what Des had said?
“Yeah, Justin I was just getting equated with your little girlfriend here or is she Nathans or Blake’s.” Des sneers at him. I look at Justin like what the fuck.
“Do you mean my little stepsister?” Justin questions in a voice I had only heard from him once and that was when I tried to run away. It still doesn’t sound right on him. He throws his arm over me protective.
“Why don’t you run home Sophia, moms looking for you something about pancakes,” Justin tells me.
“Yum sounds good,” I say, deciding I'm going to leave Justin with whatever boy drama this is. I start running down the road but I do a small spell so I can hear a bit of their conversation.
“Stay away from her.” Justin snaps at Des. Des laughs.
“Or what?” he asks Justin.
“Or you’ll regret it,” Justin tells him.
“Oh, I’m quaking in my boots as your new little country sister would say.” Des laughs. I decide boy drama or not Des isn’t someone who I want to be friends with. I cancel my listening spell and go into the house. Charlie is actually stood laughing with Sarah.
“Hello, Sophia good run?” Charlie asks me. I blink at him confusedly.
“Um yeah, thanks,” I say.
“Where did you go?” Sarah asks me smiling at me.
“I went for a run on the beach,” I tell her truthfully.
“Sounds lovely,” Sarah tells me.
“Pancakes?” Charlie asks me indicating the pan in front of him.
“Um yeah please,” I say looking at the pancakes confused, isn't Charlie still angry or is this him playing a part for his new girlfriend. Sarah platted me up one.
“I’m going to school in 10 minutes but Nathan said he will take you again and you got 40 minutes. Can you get dressed in that? if not Sarah has said she can pop you to school.” Charlie starts. I practically inhale my pancake.
“Yeah, I can be ready for Nathan. But that is a very nice offer, Sarah. Thank you for the pancake it was amazing. I’m going to jump in the shower.” I say to them wiping the last bit of chocolate sauce of my plate.
“Sophia take your clothes into the bathroom with you,” Charlie says firmly. I nod.
“Will do,” I tell him and go into my room. I drag out a pair of denim shorts and a top the outfit was fine as was something I had worn at my last school. I take it into the bathroom with me, grabbing shoes first. I jump into the shower and then I get dressed. Because I can still hear Sarah out there, I will have to make hairdryer noises so use my magic to make the noise and make a hairdryer appear in my hand then I do my hair with a wave of my hand. Once I'm done I leave the bathroom.
“Wow, and I always thought my boys got dressed quick,” Sarah says looking at me, I was doing my lipgloss manually as I come out the bathroom but that was the only makeup I hadn't done.
“Can I please have another pancake?” I say noticing the pile she has on a plate, she nods so I grab one.
“Sophia, can you sort your own dinner out tonight?” Charlie asks me.
“Yeah, no problem,” I tell him.
“Okay, I will be back about 11 be in bed okay?” Charlie tells me.
“Alright,” I say, feeling like I'm in a twilight zone.
“The boys might come round. there’s plenty of snacks in the cupboard.” Charlie tells me.
“Okay,” I tell him, what's going on?
“I got to go to work.” Charlie says, he kisses Sarah. I watch them leave together kissing in the driveway, yep defiantly twilight zone. I go outside after I've eaten another pancake. Nathan is there, with a can of energy drink in his hand.
“You alright did Des hurt you?” he asks me worried.
“No why would he have hurt me?” I ask confused, Des seemed like he could be a jerk, but nothing about him says dangerous.
“Hes just not a nice guy Sophia, stay away from him,” Nathan tells me.
“Alright,” I tell him, I wasn’t going to fight him.
“Last night went brilliant didn’t it,” Nathan says with an honest to God smile, I didn't realize he could smile before lunchtime.
“I don’t know,” I say confused.
“Well, there were no arguments that’s always such a plus,” Nathan says laughing. I look at him trying to see the sarcasm, all Charlie and I basically did was argue.
“Come on let's go to school, maybe today you'll make a friend.” He says.
“Maybe,” I tell him still confused. We drive to school, I can’t work out why everyone is being so weird this morning. reverse psychology? When I get out of Nathans car, Caspian walks up.
“Hey,” I greet him.
“You're new?” Nathan questions Caspian confused.
“Yeah, I'm just popping by not a student here,” Caspian tells. I look at him confused.
“What did you do?” I mumble.
“Will sort it in a minute,” Caspian tells me.
“You know each other?” Nathan asks, looking from me to Caspian and back again.
“My little cousin, I'm just driving through and thought I would check on her,” Caspian tells him.
“Can I talk to you Fee,” Caspian asks, indicating alone. I nod. I go with him, just walking next to him like it was nothing odd.
“Did it work?” he asks me, looking at me a knowing smile on his lips.
“What the hell did you do, I'm in a twilight world,” I say nudging him in the side, he laughs.
“Did your dad remember the fight?” he asks me interested.
“Not that I know,” I tell him.
“Alright, I will share with you the memory they all have. He said he touched my shoulder and a very friendly family meal settles in my head.
“That’s what they all remember that’s what happened. Okay?” Caspian asks me worried looking at me as my head slightly sways and I try to keep my breakfast down, it feels like I'm on a boat.
“Thank you,” I say to him.
“No props I wish I could do more. When I get back I will teach you to swim. Don’t get into to much trouble I'm not wiping a whole towns memory again.” he tells me. I smile.
"Thank you so much, Caspian," I tell him.
"Its nothing Fee, just remember the conversation not the under one." He tells me squeezing my shoulder.
“Alright see you later,” he tells me looking at me worriedly. He sighs looking at me worried then pulls me into a hug.
"This is why I don't come on land much, humans mess with my emotions," he says squeezing me.
"See you in a few weeks." He assures me as he walks off. I trust him to come back, which is weird.
him then he walked off. “You okay?” Nathan asks me worriedly walking up to me.
“Yeah, just.” I start.
“Yeah,” I say.
“Alright,” Nathan says still looking worried.
“Make friends today,” Nathan tells me and walks away. I go into school. Caspian never happened so no one in school looks at me funny, I'm just invisible now.
I go into homeroom alone. I sit next to Paperboy, wishing that I had found a different chair yesterday, I could have sat in Caspians but then I would be in front of the paperboy and that seems a worse idea.
“Wheres your freak of a cousin?” he asks me.
“What?” I ask confused. No one should remember Caspian I know that much, I now have a different memory of yesterday and it didn’t involve lunch with Des at all anymore.
“You heard me.” he sneers at me.
“You can’t really forget someone who turns up to school naked,” he says really loudly. Everyone turns to look at him funny even me.
“Sounds a really weird dream and I don’t think I want to hear about it,” I say to him. He blinks at me really confused. How the hell does he remember?
“You know what I’m talking about Caspian?” He says to the girl the other side of him, who had practically hung off Caspian at one point.
“Des what are you smoking?” she asks him.
“What how?” Des questions blinking at everyone. I look at him.
“I have no clue what you’re talking about,” I tell him.
“What about this morning?” he questions me.
“Sorry?” I say confused.
“Justin saying you’re his and Nathans new step sister?” he questions me. I look at Nathan like what the hell Des has kind of got an audience.
“Yeah, she’s my stepsister,” Nathan says shrugging from the back of the classroom.
“What drugs are you on now Des you're losing your last marbles.” toliet guy says laughing. Des looks at me and his eyes kind of glow in a way I know from Abe when he's pissed.
“Oh,” I say looking in his eyes, he tries to hide them. but I wave my finger, the laughing instantly stops and the teacher starts reading the register from the beginning. Mine and Des’s conversation never taking place.
“You’re a?” Des questions me looking at me like I'm unbelievable.
“So are you,” I question in disbelief, explains my feelings about him. He laughs, I look behind me and Nathan is glaring at Des.
“We need to talk.” Des laughs. “No, we don’t, you said all your talking yesterday,” I inform him. The bell goes. The teacher who hasn’t even finished the register looks puzzled.
“Alright class go to your lessons. Something must be up with the bells.” She says confused. We all leave. Toilet guy throws his arm around my shoulder.
“Sof isn’t it?” he asks me.
“Um Sophia,” I tell him correcting him.
“Where have you been hiding my whole life?” he asks me. I look at Nathan like really, he scoffs his own laugh at his friend.
“You got History next?” Des asks.
“um.” I did but I didn’t want to say yeah. Des grabs me physically and kind of pulls me. I see Nathans anger. We turn a corner quickly and Des pushes me into a boys toilet, the same one I bloody used yesterday.
“Alright how did you do it?” he questions me.
“Do what?” I ask.
“Erase everyone's memory of your freak cousin.” He spits at me.
“I don’t know.” I start.
“Witches are immune so stop the crap.” He grumbles.
“I really don’t know what you're talking about,” I say trying not to laugh.
“I don’t have any cousins,” I tell him.
“Oh for fuck sake at least tell me what I should fucking remember from yesterday then so I don’t sound like a freak all day.” he snaps at me.
“I can't stop you sounding like a freak,” I tell him.
“You really are fucking related to Nathan.” He spits at me in anger.
“Should have been nicer to me,” I say leaning back slightly on a wall.
“Guys pee on that wall,” Des said matter of factly.
“Eww, that’s so gross,” I say standing up, wanting to rub myself in disinfectant.
“It wasn’t my spell so I don’t know myself. I just know that not much of yesterday happened.” I tell him throwing the guy a bone.
“So lunch?” he questions me.
“Nope, your friends won’t have any memory of it, because Megan never talked to me, because she first talked to me about Caspian,” I tell him. he shakes his head.
“He is that powerful a wizard?” he questions me.
"He's a merman.” I shrug.
“He is what?” he asks me in shock.
“Oh come on Des get with the times, we live in the 21st century,” I tell him. he glares at me.
“I wish guys would stop dragging me into men's rooms,” I say when a guy comes in already pulling himself out. it was toliet guy! honestly, does he have a problem?
“OMG THIS IS THE GUYS ROOM!” he yells seeing me.
“Don’t worry I won't tell anyone about your little pistol,” I tell him calmly.
“GET OUT.” he yells at me.
“Woo Deja vu.” I hear him say as I leave laughing.
“Oh come on,” I say to Des still laughing. He shakes his head but is still smiling.
“We agree to a truss?” I ask him, holding out my magic finger. Des sees Nathan then hovering in the hallway near a locker, he looks pissed off.
“I will never have a truss with Nathan.” He snaps at me, glaring at Nathan.
“I wasn’t asking for Nathan,” I tell him, but he storms away from me.
“you alright did he hurt you?” Nathan questions me so worriedly.
“Shouldn’t you be in history?” I ask him.
“Yeah so should you,” he tells me.
“Stay away from Des,” Nathan tells me.
“What's his and your deal?” I ask him.
“Hes just not a good guy Soph alright.” He says.
“Don’t call me Soph,” I tell him.
“Where is history?” I ask him as I'm about to walk off.
“Just wait for Matt and then we can go together,” Nathan tells me.
“If I get detention and Charlie flips I'm blaming you,” I say to him.
“Really that’s how this is going to go?” Nathan asks me.
“The only reason ever to have a big brother is to blame him for stuff,” I tell him. Thats when toliet guy (who I now realize is called Matt) comes out.
“Sophia that isn’t the only reason to have a big brother,” Nathan tells me.
“Really what else they good for?” I ask him suspiciously.
“Telling their little siblings what to do,” Nathan tells me.
“Really I should talk to Justin about that,” I say with a smirk.
“Come on if you’ve got me detention I'm blaming you,” Nathan tells me.
“Dude are you not addressing her being in the guys with Des!” Matt questions Nathan.
“Stay away from Des alright?” Nathan tells me.
“Alright,” I say. but I had to admit, I wonder why a wizard or warlock would have a problem with humans and it makes me decide I need to confirm my new family is human. I wouldn’t let my dad go into another relationship with a witch without being aware. Mom had hurt him, I knew that. Believe me, I see that. I think that is another reason he won’t accept me. We arrive in history late. I wave my finger ever so slightly.
“Please take a seat.” The teacher says, not even caring. Des looks like he isn’t sure what to do, but I sit next to a girl I have never spoken to but that is easy, I have never spoken to many kids here.
Well, day two lunchtime comes around quickly and again I'm torn on what to do. I take a deep breath looking at the busy cafeteria.
“Freak.” I hear the girl say about me, couldn't Caspian have done something about her?
“Hurry up Jan we got to go break some freshman dreams.” Freak girl says. I watch them run off in their little cheerleading outfits. Had Tiff and I been like that? Yeah, actually we had been. I sigh I think that was even a line I had said in the past. I decided there is nothing wrong with watching and judging, just because I'm not trying out didn’t mean I couldn’t watch. When I get to the gym I slip in the back of the benches out of view. I watch them and I watch young kids have their feelings squashed. told they are too fat, too skinny. I might have been mean on someone's gymnastic skills but I had never body shamed anyone but myself
“Of course your desperate to be popular.” Des sneers at me. I hadn't realized he had come up the steps to my bench.
“Why are you following me?” I ask him.
“We have things to address.” He tells me.
“Alright, I will start,” I tell him as he sits next to me.
“No, I will.” He snaps.
“Fine you start I want to hear,” I tell him.
“Why are you here?” he sneers at me.
“I have been forced to move in with my sperm donor for a year,” I say truthfully.
“My turn,” I say.
“Nathan and Justin human?” I question. He scoffs
“Yeah.” He tells me.
“Shouldn’t you have already checked?” he questions me with a raised eyebrow.
“Give me a break all I keep doing is fighting with my sperm donor,” I say.
“My turn.” He tells me.
“Whos your father?” he questions me.
“our English teacher,” I mumble.
“Mr. D?” he asks me taken aback.
“But hes so cool,” Des says.
“Have you spent any actual time with the man?” I ask. I watch a kid do a cartwheel.
“You know I would never have guessed Mr. D to have such a sucky kid,” Des says.
“Wow and there I thought we were improving,” I say.
“I mean Nathan,” Des says.
“What is your problem with each other?” I question.
“Ask him.” Des snaps.
“I did he told me just to stay away from you,” I admit.
“Maybe for the best we both do.” he snaps angrily.
“Maybe but I do have something I want to address with you,” I say and I mean it, I have seen Megan in Trig and it makes me feel guilty I hadn't said anything to anyone.
“What?” he snaps at me.
“Your friend Megan,” I start.
“What about her.” he snaps at me.
“It isn’t my place,” I say nervously. I hate this part.
“Then why bring it up.” he snaps at me. no one is paying us attention I know what he has done.
“Because you need to help her, or let me get close to her without making her hate me,” I tell him. “What the fuck do you mean, make your own friends.” he spits at me.
“Then you help her.” I snap back.
“what do you mean help her?” he questions.
“Well, I don’t want to be the one to tell you but your girlfriend,” I say knowing for a fact then she is, which is why he had hated me being around her.
“Oh, you talked to your new brother.” He sneers at me.
“No, remember he told me to stay away from you lot,” I say rolling my eyes.
“Then what about Megan.” He questions.
“Her stepdads abusing her and she's been self-harming for a few years,” I tell him.
“What I would fucking know.” he snaps at me.
“Dude I'm not lying. She doesn’t want you to know. she doesn’t want anyone to know. she's not hurting herself for attention. shes doing it to have control over something, even if its as little as that knife on her skin feeling like she controls how much pain she feels.” I tell him, slightly understanding her.
“I don’t know how to help her, accept turning her stepdad into a frog and telling someone to get her help,” I admit.
“She needs someone to talk to,” I tell him.
“She can fucking talk to me, you can't come in from nowhere and try to take over my life.” Des snaps at me.
“Des if I could I would be getting out of here,” I tell him.
“Then why aren’t you?” he snaps.
“My aunts grounded my broom,” I mumble. I watch a cheerleader do a routine.
“Help Megan and if you need help let me know,” I tell Des holding out my magic finger.
“Why would I magic link with you.” he spits.
“I don’t know I've never been at odds with another witch or wizard before it feels weird not to be on the same side, not to be friends” I admit to him.
“I can't help who my sperm donor loves. One thing we can't meddle in is love. I can't help who my family is Des.” I say looking at Nathan pinch a girls ass.
“Yeah, I used to be a cheerleader at my last school,” I say truthfully.
"I love gymnastics and when I cheer I feel like I'm part of something. But I choose that I didn’t want that here, I might try out for track.” I tell him. Des watches me torn.
“Sort Megan out if you need help let me know,” I tell him.
“Where is your mom?” Des asks me.
“Dead,” I say watching a girl cartwheel and land wrong.
“Sorry,” Des said.
“That must be hard,” he says a lot less venom in his voice.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” I tell him, tears pricking my eyes.
“Mr. D knows?” Des asks.
“Yeah,” I say.
“And he accepts that’s amazing he really is the best teacher.” Des starts.
“He doesn’t accept,” I say looking at the freshman try a routine.
"He never has accepted me and mom," I tell him. Maybe Des out of any person might understand. I don't have the strength or the heart to see if I can make Charlie accept me, because he had hurt me enough already. I'm not going to risk him ever hurting me again.