I hang upside down on the couch watching sponge bob. (if you comment prepare to be turned into a toad) The rest of the school day hadn’t been a problem, but I kind of missed most of my lunch period but at the same time I didn’t have to talk much to Des. Because his phone had beeped with a message from Megan so he had run off to see to her. meanwhile, no one was the wiser I was at the try-outs today so I hadn’t made any more enemy’s thankfully. Charlie was currently in his room getting ready for his date. I’m meant to be doing my homework because more than the evil English teacher had set some today. Although that evil English teacher had set another piece. Both due on Monday. He obviously does not want his class to have lives. The sound of the doorbell going fills the air as it sings almost twinkle twinkle little star.
“SOPHIA CAN YOU GET THE DOOR,” Charlie yells as if I didn’t hear it.
“YEAH,” I yell back. we aren’t fighting and I really owe Caspian for that, I also don’t want to start fighting, so I climbed off the couch and go to the door.
“Hey?” I question to Justin who stands on my doorstep, in jeans and a fitted t-shirt, his long hair loose around him and it doesn’t look like he’s saved today as has a bit of a shadow going on. he really is hot when he isn’t wearing a bandana.
“Hey is Mr. D ready, mom told me to see if he wanted to drive or if she should,” Justin tells me.
“Charlie its Justin he wants to know.” I start to yell. Charlie comes out of his room then though dressed.
“Is your mom ready?” he asks Justin. I take Charlie in he looks nice in his shirt and tie.
“Yeah.” Justin shrugs.
“Alright,” Charlie says.
“Sophia, did you want me to sort you something for dinner?” Charlie asks me.
“No that’s fine, I can make my own.” I shrug.
“Okay good,” Charlie tells me because I want to pull his leg slightly I decide to add.
“But just in case. Where is the fire extinguisher kept?” I ask innocently. Charlie pulls $30 out his wallet in his pocket.
“Order a takeaway.” He tells me firmly.
“You too Justin,” Charlie said reaching in his wallet again.
“Charlie $30 is enough to get a takeaway, I can share,” I say rolling my eyes. is he trying to buy us now?
“you’ve seen how much Nathan and I eat right?” Justin asks me as Charlie put another $30 on the table.
“Are you all going to come here or go to yours?” Charlie asks Nathan.
“Up to Soph.” Justin shrugs.
“I don’t mind.” I shrug.
“Then we will be at ours,” Justin says with a smile. Charlie nods.
“Sophia it’s a school day tomorrow I want you home and in bed by 10,” Charlie tells me firmly. I want to comment but Justin nudges me.
“Alright,” I say.
“What time is your friend picking you up tomorrow?” he asks me.
“Bout 5 pm,” I say truthfully.
“Alright, I will talk to you after school tomorrow.” He tells me calmly.
“Do all your homework.” He says firmly.
“Yeah okay,” I say rolling my eyes, he looks at me and I see so much worry cross his face. he is torn and he didn’t know how to say goodbye to me.
“Be good and listen to Justin do not do anything.” Charlie starts.
“Dangerous.” He goes with, giving me a look that says more than his words.
“Its fine Mr. D,” Justin tells him. He did go through and I watch him go.
“Hes trying Sophia,” Justin says, I know which is why I hadn’t bit his head off.
“I know,” I mumble weakly. We wait until his car leaves the drive with Sarah in the passenger seat, then Justin carries my books over to his. When we get there Nathan is sat at the table doing his own English homework, it is the first time I have been round here. I take in the pictures of the boys on the walls growing up, evidence that there are three people living here.
“I thought you said your English teacher was the best one you have. that makes 2 pieces of homework in a week.” I point out sitting at the table opposite Nathan.
“Yeah hes on an evil roll,” Nathan informs me looking up from his homework.
“Alright pizza or Indian or Chinese?” Justin asks pulling his cellphone out his pocket.
“Pizza,” Nathan says, I shrug
“Pizzas fine,” I tell him.
“Any preference?” Justin asks me.
“I will eat anything.” I shrug.
“Alright,” Justin says. he rings the takeaway whilst I do my English homework. Then I do my maths instantly.
“How smart are you?” Nathan asks with a raised eyebrow.
“regretting not testing out and going college a year early,” I admit, looking at Nathan as he watches me. The door knocks.
“Fastest delivery ever it won’t be free,” I say looking at the clock.
“That’s just Blake,” Justin says going to the door and opening it. Blake comes in, he is in tight jeans today and a hoody his hair damp like he has come straight from the shower, I can admit to myself hes hot, he’s even got stubble today. did he and Justin agree not to shave today?
“Sorry, I’m late,” Blake says.
“No problems just ordered the food and the kids are doing their homework,” Justin says.
“Kids?” Nathan snaps.
“Oh shush little boy,” Blake says coming over, he drops his bag he looks over Nathans’ shoulder.
“You’re not meant to.” Blake starts looking at Nathans work. Nathan has moved on subject but I wasn’t paying much attention to what he was doing.
“Need any help, Sophia?” Justin asks.
“No, I’m fine.” I shrug. I finish doing my homework.
“They say what time they’ll be back?” Nathan asks when he’s finished himself.
“Nope,” Justin tells him.
“If they have kids at both houses, which house will they go to for sex?” Blake questions. we all glare at him.
“You all admit your wanting to avoid it,” Blake laughs, it still doesn’t reach his eyes.
“Why don’t they live together?” I ask what had been confusing me, I know Charlie wants to. I know Sarah does too. They’ve been together a long time, so why aren’t they? They all look at each other.
“Because of Charlie?” I ask kind of knowing the answer, what did happen between him and mom?
“Um kind of. what pizzas did you get?” Blake says trying to change the subject.
“Were they going to move in together this year or when you’ve moved to college?” I ask.
“They were waiting until we moved to college,” Nathan says, I hear the truth. Good, it wasn’t my fault.
“He didn’t not move in because of you Soph, it just well.” Justin starts.
“delayed it?” I question.
“Not really, think moms still into the idea,” Nathan says.
“Your mom dated?” Justin asks me.
“Yeah.” I shrug.
“Did you like any of the guys?” Nathan asks me.
“Sometimes.” I shrug.
“We liked Mr. D,” Nathan tells me.
“Don’t you like him now?” I question.
“Sometimes, but we can’t really seem to like him as much anymore,” Nathan admits.
“Because?” I question.
“You,” Nathan admits.
“Am I really that bad?” I question. Hey, I was actually on my best behavior.
“No, you’re actually great,” Justin says glaring at his brother.
“We just don’t get it, how hes been such a crap dad. It makes us worry.” Nathan admits. I take a deep breath.
“Justin, how do you feel you would cope if you had a kid right now?” I question him.
“What?” Justin asks me his eyes wide. a bit of fear on his face. It slightly makes me want to laugh.
“You’re almost the age he was when he had me.” I shrug. realizing the truth in that. my parents were so young.
“My mom was younger than you are now when she had me. when she married him.” I sigh thinking about how scared she must have been at the time. all the guys are silent, that is also when my phone beeps, filling the awkward silence. I look at the message its just Tiff.
Tiff – I miss you,
Tiff – I love you,
Tiff – I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.
Tiff – forgive me?
Tiff – Please Sophie I hate it when we don’t talk.
Tiff – I miss you.
Tiff – Please
Tiff – I know I should have called Abby out on her bullshit and I did at school.
Tiff – You know I love you
Tiff – Please.
Tiff – I
Tiff – L
Tiff – O
Tiff – V
Tiff – E
I roll my eyes,
“Answer whoever it is and put them out there misery,” Nathan says rolling his eyes as I watch the messages come through on my phone.
“My best friend,” I mumble, thats one thing I don’t doubt.
“Why aren’t you replying? You don’t have to push her or him away just because you’ve moved.” Justin says matter of factly.
“Just girl drama we will sort it out,” I mumble. I look at the messages. Justin puts on the TV and we all go to the couch.
I sit next to Nathan and he put crash bandicoot on the PlayStation after a while. I actually like playing the game. I can have a laugh with them and I know it isn’t forced which means more to me than I can ever admit. I just have beat Nathan and am tucking into my 3rd slice of pizza when my cell starts to ring. I look at the caller, why was Jacob video calling me? I look at my phone torn, I didn’t like the idea of answering the call and being hurt in front of the guys, because they had been seeing that way too much and we were getting on.
“Sophia, are you going to answer?” Justin asks me a raised eyebrow on his face.
“No,” I tell him looking at my phone like it is a demon. It hangs up. My phone kind of buzzes a few seconds later. I look at it.
Jacob – it’s not what you think babe.
Jacob – please babe
Jacob – You know I would never hurt you. Especially like that.
I look at the messages what the fuck is going on at home?
“What’s wrong?” Blake asks shoving a whole slice in his mouth.
“People have lost their minds,” I mumble. Blake tries to talk.
“How actually why?” I say indicating him with his mouth full.
Jacob – Please Sophie, can we at least talk about it?
Sophie – talk about what?
I have to reply. My phone starts ringing again as a video call. I answer.
“It’s not what you think Sophie baby,” Jacob tells me the moment I answer, his handsome worried face filling the screen.
“Jacob I know you well enough to know that when you say something is not what I think. Its what I think. But as we’ve broken up and I haven’t talked to you since I can’t think whats got your thong in a twist as I can honestly promise you I haven’t thought of you.” I tell him. Nathan scoffs.
“Babe,” Jacob begs I realize that its kind of a turn-off.
“I ain’t dating her, I would never do that to you,” Jacob tells me, sounding whiny.
“Dating who and why would I care?” I ask confused I honestly am.
“You haven’t talked to Tiff?” he asks me.
“Your dating Tiff?” I ask actually really hurt if she had been into Jacob why the hell had she never said.
“Of course I ain’t fucking dating Tiff, fuck off Sophie I would never do that to you. neither would she” Jacob tells me.
“Then pretend I am clueless to what your drama is about and explain it. We’ve broken up you can do whatever you fucking want.” I tell him.
“Language,” Justin tells me. I look at him, hes been swearing like a trooper as Nathan beats his ass at the PlayStation
“Who was that Sophie?” Jacob asks.
“Justin.” I shrug, not wanting to go into my new family drama with anyone. I hadn’t even talked to Tiff about my new stepbrothers to be.
“Whos Justin?” Jacob questions me. a look of jealousy on his face
“Dude why the fucking hell do you care?” I question.
“We’ve only been broke up 2 weeks,” Jacob tells me sounding hurt like I don’t know that!
“OMG Jacob, you ring me to tell me you weren’t dating someone and going to get your thong in a twist on the fact I’m at a friends?” I question him.
“Your just friends,” Jacob asks worriedly. Nathan laughs. I glare at him.
“Are you round someones?” Jacob asks me looking at me like I had betrayed him.
“Yeah, I’m round someones,” I say.
“Glad you’ve made some friends,” Jacob says running his hand through his hair, I watch him giving him my bewildered face, why did I use to think he was cute?
“How are you getting on at your new school?” Jacob asks.
“Fine.” I shrug, reminding myself that once Jacob and I had been friends, before dating as kids, he was the same, it was me who had changed when my mom passed not him.
“You tried out for cheerleading yet?” Jacob asks.
“No I decided not to,” I admit to him.
“Why the fuck not, you love to cheer.” Jacob starts.
“Yeah well I got to take it easy on my shoulder.” I point out cutting him off, I had been taking it easy on my shoulder for months but he and I both know I hadn’t followed through with the doctor’s advice early on, I had just been taking the painkillers by the handful, it dulled it. I look at him still like what the fuck though, why was he really ringing? I can’t get a feel on him over the phone.
“Is it still hurting you? Are you doing the physio exercises your doctor told you to? Have you refilled your prescription” Jacob starts worriedly, it reminds me of when he had really cared, his worried face from the hospital all those months ago, him sitting next to me holding me as I cried my heart out.
“Jacob, what the hell? did you just ring to confuse me?” I ask him, tears pricking at the back of my eyes.
“Sophie,” Jacob says running his hand through his hair. Nathan peak at my phone from where he is sat next to me.
“I miss you,” Jacob says his voice deep, his accent sounding more like home than anything else could right then.
“uh okay?” I ask my voice going heavy itself, I feel defeated and tired.
“I didn’t cheat on you, I know what everyone’s saying but I didn’t,” Jacob tells me. actually, I knew for a fact you had 2 times in our relationship but I knew he had regretted both times. that he was drunk at a party and the girls put out whilst I didn’t. I hated the fact that sex had been more important to him than me.
“Of course not we are broken up,” I say to him clearly and slowly like I’m trying to describe something complicated. Justin laughs.
“Is that all you wanted to tell me, Jacob?” I ask him.
“Sophie,” Jacob says like he was trying to reason with me.
“Jacob the whole point in breaking up is so we don’t have to talk,” I suggest weakly, doe’s he realize how homesick he is making me?
“I wanted to talk to you and explain,” Jacob tells me.
“Then explain,” I say letting out a puff of air, why can’t he just drop it?
“Can you go somewhere private?” Jacob asks me. I look at Nathan, shrug my shoulders at him.
“To be honest not really,” I say as Nathan kind of just lean forward and takes another slice of pizza and Justin sits on the other side of the couch sandwiching me in between the two of them. “Alright.” Jacob sighs.
“So what’s your dad like?” Jacob asks.
“Taller than me, a few grey hairs,” I say shrugging.
“I didn’t mean like that Fee,” Jacob says weakly chuckling, but it’s fake.
“How are you getting on?” Justin asks me.
“Alright.” I shrug to him, taking in his bedroom behind him, how many days after school had I spent laid up in his room?
“Have you made many friends?” Jacob asks.
“Not really.” I shrug.
“Hey what are we?” Justin asks his mouth full of pizza.
“Gross,” I say laughing as cheese kind of drips out his mouth.
“How many people are you with?” Jacob asks me looking wide-eyed.
“Three.” I shrug.
“What are you doing, why aren’t you with your dad?” he asks.
“What’s with the 100 questions Jake?” I ask him. “Fee I, I just think you shouldn’t I mean rush anything, you should use the time to get to know your dad,” Jacob says looking hurt. I blink at him absolutely confused.
“We’ve only just broken up and we’ve been together years, your moms just well.” Jacob starts.
“Jacob I don’t know what the fucking hell you’re on tonight.” I snap at him.
“Sorry Sophie please I said that wrong, I shouldn’t have brought up your mom.” Jacob starts. Something in his room breaks I hear it through the video.
“Sorry babe, sorry,” Jacob says, looking around his room confused and worried.
“Jacob I don’t get you,” I say truthfully.
“I miss you, Sophie, I love you,” Jacob tells me, his words hit me like he slapped me. I hang up.
“And guys say girls are confusing,” I mumble, trying not to show how I feel about the love you.
“You alright?” Justin asks me looking at me worried.
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be.” I shrug. My phone starts ringing again. I look at it, Jacob video calling me again. I answer.
“What?” I snap at him.
“I rang you for a reason.” He mumbles.
“Well spit it out.” I snap at him actually cross with him.
“Do you still have my class ring.” He mumbles.
“It’s in your 2nd draw next to your bed next to the box of condoms,” I mumble trying not to look around at the guys when I say it.
“Sophia that isn’t.” Jacob starts.
“Alright, I get it not what I think,” I say.
“Do you happen to know where that restaurant was that I took you for our 5th date.” Jacob starts. “Nax,” I suggest.
“Yeah, thanks.” He says it’s like he wants me to bite and ask why he’s asking.
“Did you happen to hear who got made cheer captain without you here?” Jacob asks me.
“Abbie?” I suggest.
“Yeah.” He tells me.
“It should have been you,” Jacob tells me.
“Na Abbie always wanted it. To be honest, it should have gone to Hannah. Which I personally told the whole squad before I left and took my name out the running.” I shrug.
“Yeah well, Abbie is more popular than Hannah,” Jacob says running his hand through his hair.
“Is there an actul purpose to this conversation?” I ask him.
“I miss you,” Jacob tells me.
“It’s Thursday, our normal date night.” He mumbles as if I’ve forgotten that.
“Then take your new girlfriend to Nax,” I tell him rolling my eyes.
“He makes Nathan look smart,” Justin says way too loudly,
“Oi.“Nathan says and hits his brother. both being careful of me but I get jogged and feel more squished but I don't mind it. I try not to laugh.
“Can they hear me?” Jacob asks worriedly.
“Ofcourse they can, your on video call.” I point out like what the fuck.
“Do you know where my team jacket is?” Jacob asks me.
“in your closet 7th from the left top row,” I say.
“Thanks Sophie.” He says going into his closet.
“So what you doing round your new friends homework or something?” he asks me.
“We were playing on the PlayStation until an idiot rung,” Nathan says loudly.
“So your new friends are geeks?” Jacob asks. Nathan snatches my phone of me.
“Nathan give it back,” I say trying to get it back.
“Geeks? Even if we were at least we would take it as a hint when we are dumped.” Nathan tells Jacob. Nathan is still wearing his own team jacket and well he is Nathan, he is tall muscly and I don’t want to say it but I will have to admit it, Nathan is hot! much hotter than Jacob is at least. I do fully get why the cheerleaders are into him, I just know I would have to hide myself from him so there is little point, on top of that he was going to be my stepbrother, so should be completely off the radar. Hey mom had always said I was to young to worry about these sort of things, but when she was still alone it had always felt like she was trying to make herself feel better. I look at Nathan confused as he and Jacob talk, well argue. But Nathan didn’t flat out say he was my stepbrother or that he wasn’t my friend. Justin kind of puts his legs over me when I try to move to snatch my phone back.
“Let me talk to him,” I say. “Nah you lost the chance,” Nathan tells me smirking at me.
“Ring me back when your alone Fee,” Jacob says and he hangs up. that could have gone easier.
“How long did you date that idiot?” Nathan asks me laughing, looking at my phone screen, that has a picture of me and Tiff in our cheerleading uniform hugging.
“Just over 2 years. From the last month of our freshman year until well 3 weeks ago.” I say shrugging downplaying it all.
“Did you actually like him?” Blake asks who has been surprisingly quiet the whole conversation, he's watching the PlayStation screen rather than me like he doesn't care.
“Not for quite a while before my mom died, then yeah he was amazing for a little while, but then again no,” I admit shrugging, he had been there when I needed him the most, but he seemed to act like I should have been over it after a few weeks.
“So it took you this long to dump him because?” Justin asks. I push his legs off me.
“I don't know.” I shrug because I wanted to fit in.
“Well think he understands now?” Nathan asks with a smirk.
“Nope,” I admit, knowing he didn’t he thought I was in over my head and would want him to be my knight in shining armor and that I would come running back to him, he had it all planned in his head, the house with me with a white picket fence after sleeping around in college.
“You think hes that thick?” Blake asks me laughing.
“Um, I know where his stuff is and haven’t been in his house in almost 3 weeks, he's there every day.” I point out.
“Oh well,” I say pulling a slice of pizza of the pizza.
“Maybe I should talk to Tiff and find out what the fuck is going on at home.” I think out loud.
“Language,” Justin said. Rather than a snarky comment about how I speak 3, I eat my slice of pizza.
“I should go back to Charlies, it's getting late,” I say after a while, it is 9 and I still had my private homework to do.
“I wouldn’t,” Blake says.
“Why not?” I question confused.
“Because where do you think they are?” Blake asks me.
“Really?” I ask, hey I have been wondering how when they went out at 5 that they hadn’t come back yet.
“They could have waited till tomorrow when I'm gone for the whole weekend,” I mumble.
“Hey, you yourself said they have needs,” Nathan says. I pull a disgusted face and so does he once he has realized what he said.
“So you're going away till when?” Justin asks me.
“Sunday maybe lunch time maybe a bit later.” I shrug.
“You have that fully planned?” Justin asks me.
“Not really leaving it all up to Abe.” I shrug.
“I know you don't really see why you have to talk to Charlie but do him a favor and please stay in touch,” Justin tells me. Again I'm going to comment about how I can look after myself, but instead, I know for some reason it is important to Justin.
“As you said please.” I sigh like it's hard for me to make the simple call.
“why don't we watch a movie?” Blake suggests. Nathan puts Netflix on and we all go through Movies, I hadn’t been kidding when I had said I didn’t really watch movies. We were only 15 minutes in when Nathan obviously has enough of me keep moving about. I start watching the movie with my feet on the floor I was now kneeling with both arms behind my back.
“Soph are you not interested in this movie?” he questions me going to turn it over.
“No, it's good,” I assure him.
“then sit still.” He tells me grabbing my foot thats about to kick him in the side.
“Just trying to get comfy,” I inform him, I wiggle so I have my legs tucked behind Justin who doesn’t even seem to care and on a plus, he is keeping my feet warm. I don't know how but I fall sleep like it.
“Sophia.” Sarah's voice wakes me. I wake blinking, I look at the clock it is only 10 past 10. I was only 10 minutes late.
“Sorry I must have fallen asleep,” I grumble, the boys have all abandoned me, go figures.
“Its fine Nathan said he will walk you home in a minute he has just gone toilet and Justin just had to run Blake home as he's borrowing his truck tomorrow as his car still won’t start,” Sarah tells me. Oh, good Blake isn't driving, the streets are instantly safer.
“It's fine I can walk myself, it's only next door,” I say pointing out the sense of it.
“I'll watch you go then,” Nathan says coming out the bathroom. I shrug it seems pointless but okay. I do go home, Charlie opens the door when I knock.
“Sorry, I'm late,” I say.
“it's fine I know you fell asleep,” Charlie assures me.
“I'm going bed okay?” I ask him.
“Alright, night Sophia.” He tells me.
“Night Charlie,” I say walking into my room. My blackout blinds still down, I just wave my hands to change and fall into my bed in my PJ's.
Sara Evans new hometown is playing on the radio, mom is smiling and we are singing along laughing about her last date she had been on that she was just telling me about a few days later as was the first time we had time to catch up in agers without one of us having to be somewhere. It is 7 pm and we are off for a few days surprise trip to the spa to have some mom and daughter time as she has kind of given her students a study day tomorrow and we are going to just call me in sick in the morning
“MOM.” I scream as the lights come towards us on our side of the road.
I wake up not screaming like people often do from nightmares but I'm crying. I pull my legs to my chest and look at the time. 3 am, there is going to be no more sleep in me I know that. So I wave my hand. A Blue jumper goes on me that says
‘I took a deep breath and let it go’ and some dark grey yoga pants settle on me, I wave my hand again and my hair goes into two tight French braids. I then sit on the floor and light 5 candles and spend an hour practicing some simple magic, but it is okay to keep my mind of my dreams and make me concentrate on something else. Once I have finished my workbook it tells me my grade for today's class because I'm always being marked and it gives me an A, so yay. I look at the clock it is only 4 am. I can’t really go out yet can I? I go into the kitchen and make myself a smoothie using the blender. Charlie is still snoring away, I had thought it might wake him up but it thankfully didn’t. I take my smoothie outside onto the back porch. I won’t do my yoga yet, I don’t want to disturb Nathan, he had been nice to me yesterday and I don't think me waking him at 4 am will be a good way to pay him back for being friendly. I sit on the porch floor and cross my legs I look up at the sky, it is still dark but dawn will be soon, it's getting lighter by the second.
“Come on Sophia, its 4 fucking am go back to bed.” Nathan moans, hey I know I hadn’t made any noise. I look over at him he is at his bedroom window and he looked shattered.
“Go back to bed Nathan I'm not going to be loud, I'm just sitting,” I say quietly almost as a whisper-shout I realize.
“You’re the one who will regret it.” He groans at me shutting his bedroom window. I lean back and look back up at the sky. I lay down on the porch on my yoga mat. I don't know when it happens or even how as I was in the reclined cobbler’s pose when I fall back to sleep. I wake up to a blanket over me. I had missed dawn but it isn’t late at all. I would hazard it was only about 5.30 am ish. I sit up, the patio door is open had Charlie woken up? I go back in the house and sure enough, he is sat at the kitchen table with a coffee.
“Are you alright?” he asks me worriedly.
“Yeah.” I lie, going to sit opposite him.
“Would you like a coffee?” he asks me.
“No thank you,” I tell him. I look at the time and I was slightly earlier than I thought it was not later.
“Did I wake you?” I ask worriedly.
“No Sophia I just woke up and when I saw your bedroom door open.” He says and then he takes a deep breath.
“Sorry.” I say feeling his worry. He looks at me and takes a deep breath,
“I know your 17 Sophia and practically a grown woman.” He tells me.
“Yeah?” I ask as a question. He takes a deep breath.
“It doesn’t mean I don't worry. I know you're going to say something along the road of you haven’t worried the last 17 years so don't start now.” He says looking torn. Well no duh but not when I can feel how hard it is for you to say that. I stay quiet.
“But that was when your mom was here, I knew she would always keep you safe and not let anything ever hurt you.” He tells me. didn’t he know I didn’t want to hear him talk about her?
“I can look after myself,” I mumble after he has gone silent a long time.
“I know.” He sighs.
“I don't need anyone to walk me places, I don't need company, I don't need anyone.” I point out to him. He looks at me sadly.
“I know you don't need me, Sophia,” he says calmly looking at his coffee rather than me.
“How are you getting on with the boys?” he asks me worried. I feel his fears that I'm not liking them and Sarah, the family he really wants.
“They're fine,” I tell him.
“They really love you,” I say looking anywhere but at him.
“I love them all too Sophia,” Charlie tells me.
“I know,” I say. He takes a deep breath as if asking me to look into his heart on how he feels about me. but I can’t, I'm not going to be hurt like that ever.
“Sophia I know I am not the easiest person for you to talk to. Or trust.” He tells me, well no duh.
“I get angry at you and even I know its not your fault.” He says taking a deep breath.
“Like you getting dressed, do you even know how to manually get yourself dressed anymore?” He mumbles. Yeah, I have to every now and again. I can't really do my hair and makeup without my magic but I'm not incapable of getting dressed.
“Do you even know how to use a washing machine?” he asks me. actually, that’s a no.
“Do many teenagers?” I ask interested, hey Tiff didn’t. neither did Jacob.
“No, I suppose going on the boys they don't.” He weakly smiles.
“Charlie I am not a normal teenager, I'm never going to be. I'm not human, you wanting that isn’t going to change the fact that I'm different.” I point out.
“I know.” He sighs again like he is wrestling with the right thing to say to me.
“Sophia do you know how I meet your mother?” he asks me. I nod, mom had told the story.
“I know its hard for you to understand and you were just a baby.” He tells me looking at me like he needs me to be understanding.
“I should have tried harder to be a part of your life when you were younger.” He says seriously.
“But neither you or your mother wanted that.” He tells me looking at me. I don’t say anything knowing he didn’t actually want me to, he wanted me to listen, he had a lot on his chest he wants to say and maybe it will help us.
“But I know I am the one who should of tried, not you.” He tells me looking at me like he needs me to understand.
“You just felt lied to,” I suggest for him after a long time of silence.
“Mom wasn’t human and she never told you, then you were trapped with someone you didn’t understand and was scared off,” I say truthfully, I knew he was scared of me.
“I'm not scared of you Sophia.” He tells me looking at me.
“Yeah, you are,” I say.
“You're petrified of me,” I tell him.
“You're petrified I'm going to do something and you can’t stop me,” I say.
“No Sophia that’s not.” He starts. I stand up,
“Charlie I don't know why you did this, I don't really even want to know. The truth I didn’t want to go to England, but nor does it mean I want to be here. I loved my life, Mom was amazing and I get it your memories of her aren’t positive ones. I get that, but that’s you.” I tell him.
“Don't force your memories onto me. I don't want to remember mom how you do, I want to remember her from my eyes. I want to remember the woman who was a rubbish cook. Who couldn’t quite work out how the tv remote worked. Who didn’t carry her cellphone because she thought it was a human device to spy on her.” I tell him.
“Who would sit and read to me in 3 different languages every night, until I was old enough to read to her and then we would take it in turns. the mom who would be in the front row for my competitions. I want to remember mom for how she was for me.” I tell him.
“Do you want to talk about her, I will listen, Sophia,” Charlie says looking at me like he wants me to talk.
“I know the last few days with her must have been hard for you to except and if you need to talk about that, or even the woman she had been, I want to hear Sophia.” He tells me. The thing is he is telling the truth.
“I know you might not believe me but I did love her Sophia.” He tells me, the strength of that sentence takes me by surprise.
“Maybe I'm not ready to talk about her,” I tell him. he nods.
“I can understand that Sophia and when you are I want you to know that even if you don't believe me, I will be here and I will listen.” He tells me.
“Okay,” I say not sure what else to say.
“Want to come on a run?” I ask him.
“As we are being honest Sophia I admit I can’t think of anything worse than a run first thing in the morning, or for a matter of fact any time of the day.” He tells me, I nod I did understand that. He looks at his coffee.
“Alright, I’m going for a run. If that’s okay?” I say as a statement but I did ask at the end.
“Okay,” he says. I get to my feet, walk into the kitchen area and pull out a sports bottle of water from the fridge.
“Sophia,” Charlie says worriedly.
“Yes?” I ask.
“I thought you were human?” he questions me I know he wants the answer.
“I am Charlie but until you can bring yourself to think of me like that I won’t refer to myself as a human. Your just a muggle.” I sigh, hey he must have seen harry potter or at least must know what a muggle is.
“Sophia,” he sighs.
“No Charlie we don’t refer to plain humans as muggles,” I tell him with a weak smile, I wave my hand and my iPod arrives in it, I attach it to my arm.
“Are you doing your exercises for your shoulder?” Charlie asks me surprising me. I didn’t even realize he knew I had the exercise to do.
“No,” I tell him truthfully.
“Why not Sophia they are important.” He tells me. Yeah but they also hurt like hell and to be honest I don't really think of it, its not stopping me doing my yoga poses or a cartwheel as I tried yesterday.
“I don't really need them anymore.” I shrug.
“Sophia,” Charlie says, was I ever going to get away to do my run?
“Yes?” I asked.
“Have a good day at school today.” He tells me, I knew that wasn’t what he wanted to say.
“I will thanks,” I say. I go towards the door.
“I know its hard Sophia but can you try to make friends here?” he asks me weakly as I'm about to leave.
“I will try,” I say weakly, I open the door and leave.