Parcels of 7

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Chapter 5

The greatest love lines today was found in a movie about this woman saying that can you believe you might be sleeping with someone for 21 years. It put it in context because the woman was quite clever said the wisest things. Naturally this type is not on we are having to hook up with them to find out their vital statistics. It is in the blood what humans like to do and most of them are nasty and indecent.

I think about it all the time the times I made people do the right things when they did it they wanted things from me look you I have just did a good turn otherwise how would you have fared but are they gratified or grateful no we are coming over to see that you give us all you have.

Musing over time I find myself wondering what is the meaning of all this work and no play? You see some people are loved and cherished for their looks or what they do in the bed or out of it. But I am a common woman and with common attitudes.

Never did I fuck in the Regents park.

Never did I fuck in the school lavatory etc.

What the world has now deserved is their face which is staring them in the eye. You can see him endlessly being paraded as the man most people want to be.

Successful and pure of vision and all that of course he is.

The variable is a billionaire like Trump and then we can do it happily, He was the one who did the golf courses in. In the good Scotland when he became slightly unpopular during his visits because the natives said he diabolical and took up petitions to have him removed.

“He told the whole of them people what he as a rich man can and would do. Sent up such a heated feeling of being poor meant powerless. He got the golf course done. He did despite all the petitions he got the golf course done. Well it meant he had the rich man’s word. He so rich he got the course work done in. Similar failings as them smarter people.”

“Mr Triumph then remarried someone younger than his last wife.”

No not him.

“Yes he now into a family better.”

I am being in the family way.

He took off in his way too.

“He took off in his private jet to make his feelings more known.”

“I will drop by anytime.”

“Yes Mr Triumph.”

“Anyone said that?”

“No Mr Triumph.”

“God can’t be cured.”

“Devil is within his wish list for Christmas.”

“Why he not on the course playing his own golf course?”

“He said he did not want to.”

Now he can stay over in the Whitehouse where everyone does it best making the best things in life last and last.

The thing is small sizes are the thing now. I mean the smaller the clothes are made the more to do with the fashion wardrobe. I mean what in the Bedlam should anyone wear. Sorry in Bedlam they are all naked.

“We are not naked unless in the pool.”

“This is the Whirlpool?”

“No it is in the heated swimming pool.”

That the benefit rats are caught and they have cheated the system and made it a mockery. I have nothing to say about that sort of thing did not receive a penny did not receive a dime and what is work but recreational when one does not receive anything but kind encouraging words.

Why did not you benefit from all that civilisation could have done for you?

“They put me in a saddle did not they?”

“Well is that a fact?”

“Otherwise it is Bedlam.”

“We are all in there.”

“Are you with us?”

“Yes altogether.”

“Are in the right group?”

“What group is this?”

“This is the right universally rich group.”

“No not in the right group.”

“Oh that is okay then. I thought I had been in the poor Bedlam.”

“That is rough area.”

“You mean there is a poor Bedlam.”

“Yes that means doing work.”

“Doing what work?”

“In work this is working?”

“One gets paid for work.”

“On the social agenda that means what?”

“I am not working because not getting paid.”

“On what agenda is that and why are you so happy?”

“I just had my pills.”

“When people work they work for money.”

“With their hands and their minds and if not paid that makes them sick or something?”

“No out of work and not into company like the like ablest.”

“Instead of talking about such disasters as the war torn Cyprus and all that?”

“Praiseworthy ambition was to unsettle this amiable agreeableness which people of that crass system have and that was my ambition in this world.”

“All that time?”

“I am talking about the therapists and their time off.”

“No you are not you are criticising our institutions and such like and telling lies.”

“I was there I know and there is myself I am the proof of this whole thing I came and said words and you should not react because it is giving yourselves away just smile.”

“What sweet talking?”

“Yes in the sweat shop.”

“We did not know you so did not give you a job we had to smell you before we did.”

“Look it is not on.”

“Look what is the matter with talking.”

“I was trying to understand the lessons learnt and being slow reader made me want to learn the more.”

“I have nothing to add to the general discourse.”

What is the meaning of trust and friendship? I was no friends with you because you sort of had me expelled from two schools which interrupted my schooling.

“Who has added anything to the talk”?

“Well the bills got much higher.”

Washing dishes most of my life meant now me in such a filthy temper and trauma I am now hell and I have lived with hell all my life.

“We are not being billed for talking?”

“No action required?”

“Yes send a picture of yourself naked.”

“That is being billed.”

“What is for?”

“There is this information which was required about a certain country who masqueraded as good and I wanted to expose them for what they are.”

“Items talking the time limit.”

“It is not about talking.”

“Chatting then is not good?”

“Constant chatter makes the milk go sour.”

“Chatty bang it is that.”

“Someone saddled me without thinking.”

“Big bangers and mash with onions and gravy.”

“We are all friends together.”

“There is no more coffee with no caffeine.”

“I need to work out to the right statistics.”

“How many numbers in your phone index box?”

“None of your business that is personal.” I think a hundred I am modest she smiles innocently at her phone binge.

“I have a thousand. She does not need to know that.”

“That is my hero.”

“The captain America well he has gone to the dungeons to have his name spelt right.”

“Amigo can you stop that.”


Look when we are almost at war with them Soviets?

“They are not the bad guys.”

“Mexico is caving in.”

“I know it was wrong about the poisoning but there is something sinister about the whole thing.”

“Is it an inside job?”

“I smell such a rat as that.”

“You see first the Koreans did that sort of thing then in the S there was this other agent who was sort of done for that means a what?”

“Three separate incidents.”

“Three yes three incidents involving poisons and then the ones who got away with it are the establishment who had been running out of talking funds.”

They are all naked in Bedlam oh yes. The feeling is there is nobody swimming in Bedlam? Sun tan lotions? Not on your Nelly we are having breakfast makes my wife’s cooking seem bearable in comparison and now I can safely tell her cooking has improved on me.

Has he gone out of his mind? No not at all he is missing his wife. After today’s cornflakes he is feeling sorry he ever been. When he has been? To this motel he does not like to think himself hard done by. He should have made off with the Mac’s Big Macs. He does not wear a raincoat. It makes him look not fabulous.

I was as if wondering what to think we are all now in the showers having this shower. Well what else we are so clean we can spit on them who do not have a shower. Has anyone thought about the rooms one is living in?

I mean no disrespect but who is showering all day and not living in the clean rooms? We are. No way. Look who has cleaned or dusted their bedrooms did their clean jet set added lustrous to the oven? Well no if I clean the oven or the gas hobs my boy friend asks me to send for a engineer.

“Well I will not harm them good gas stove will I honey?”

I am trying reason and tactfulness to my bearing. He thinks overbearing nature but I am behaving nicely towards his prejudices. He does not have any pride his own selfish interest is intent on living with the dust and the grime. He does not note his own space. The poor dear when I remove something he is standing over my shoulder asking me in a polite manner what I am doing?

“What are you doing?”

I am over rated as a author on discourse and method but what if it is true?

“What is it to you what is here in my space it is every time we make love you change the sheets?”

Look why is there such a thing when they say they will play football with these guys and then why the haste what if that is a normal reaction but they do not want them football hooligans in Moscow that is why they are going there to give them hell. Law and order what is it all about mayhem.

“We are not dirty I had a wash.”

“I do think sex smells are nastier than anything makes me go off the idea.”

“What I love a lovely smell of the bodily odours reminds me of horses.”

“Even stables and chicken coops need to be clean honey.”

“No way I am loving the smells of bottoms.”

“Gently does it to make a point. Gently I just had a clean done.”

“You have cleaned the kitchen floor?”

“I did.”

“Guilty as charged” they all cheered.

“This volatile world will become impossible with such a attitude.”

“They destroyed the clean atmosphere.”

“The surfaces which I have just done are clean sir?”

“Did you also do them?”

“The things under the dusting boards”

“With the duster which you have just soaked in the sink”?

“Yes to get the dirt out of the duster otherwise no point.”

“You did not shine the mirrors?”

“No the cleaning agent did not say that.”

“Did you also do the garden?”

“Yes I did some garden work.”

“I am going to hospital.”

“What is the matter?”

“My heart has gone down a level or two,”

“Is it something I have just done?”

“Do you think I am a man who needs a serving wrench?”

A maid is forever.

“No not at all dear.”

“You are always showering the washing machine is not on because only once a day in fact twice a week. There is too much on the electric bill.”

“Do you need something else?”

“I am giving the nursing staff that looked after me a microwave oven as they need to eat at night the poor nurses only get cold food at night. Except for hot tea and coffee they do not hot stuff at all.”

“They have nothing to eat at night?”

“No they are all into tea and coffee.”

“They are bananas.”

“No need to eat such fruit.”

“It is distressing how much food you need to eat.”

“Animals feed less.”


How to make a male soufflé as it is known as, say to him behind and in front the private things you do in bed and tell him what a tiger he is. Tell soufflé to make his best things in front of his former girl friends and tell him he has the hottest bed manners ever.

Girls can castrate a man just by doing that. Castrate his liking for the things common things. The beastly look of sex in the womanly eyes as if the eye of the tiger has gone to sleep. We do it best in the heap hop jungle it is making the flamingo outside the right side has left this sleepy male has begot his side and he looks like a kitten fed and watered down. Like something who has fed too long outside and poisons has in his hide. He now so sleepy walking in his sleep might even is the bearer of bad tides and grief. There is no more about this than his passions spent he is no longer the man he is now the fed. He has fed on poison too long he has now gone into labours.

“There is the Labour exchange?”

“No the betting shop.” Abdul has gone to the betting shop with our money.

“No one is in the office.”

“His lines too long he will not ask for anything but to be what?”

“I do not think he minds now what he has in his bed.”

“As long it is long and thin?”

“Largely it is not on me to add to the list.”

“He has the right ordeals give him another one of them long thin ones.”

“I speak the truth the true meaning of behaving like a slut is to look good while speaking his lies.”

“Lies we are lied to.”

“Who has hurt you tell me who has tossed you aside who has made me unmanned me what has happened to you?”

“Do not ask me such a stupid question when you know the answer.”

“But I don’t know the answer I don’t.”

How many lies has he told? But he does not know the answer.

“We do like ourselves too well.”

Abdul is gambling the money and blackmailing us and then balancing the books so he can become the clerk the jury and the judge as well in order to romance his way to our doom.

“Only fondness speaks.” Said my sisters and mother that they were not that good and kindly disposed toward me that I was over reacting as usual it is a bit of fun and why is the frustrations felt when there is nothing to fear?

Actions speak loud as storms. I am going with the lantern and I see many secrets many deeds and much to worry over.

“Odd and old woman old wives tales that the marriage bond is sacred when there is nothing in the bed but him.”

“Active with the conceits why should I care when I had nobody but the man in my dreams?”

“I am telling you because you are a fool.”

“I am hopeless?”

“That too I am a woman and I want a man without the stings which mother Gold put me through the thing is he is the one for me he makes me think and be and I am alive with that more alive as if he and I were in a film.”

The lantern finds she in passions not spent added to this she is not behaving well. What should a proper widow be doing? What did the wife do and why is there too much passion suddenly the lantern is spot on.

“We want a Nan?”

“Well children you will not get that.”

“You will be lucky if you have a home from her and that is certain.”

“Certainties are the exposures to ills and why does he now live with my Tom?”

“We all behave nastily.”

“We with the older women mothers and wives who have been neglected and left behind and we must now feed them and cherish them.”

It is a odd situation is it not?

“We are now worn out carpets.”

“Look them beings in their good tidal looks.”

“I can out think you all.”

“In this altogether of meaningless meanings it is such a mistake.”

In passions she might have done the deed and not thought about it at all. The deed of murder is the power and the glory, the deed that would have sent me over to the cuckoo hospital forever and good.

“We are full of meanings.”

“Too many meanings in life it is that simple there is not just one thing that is within the meaning there are many things hidden even from the self and what we desire sometimes is like more sweets to the sweet and we must have it.”

“It is over the moon.”

“Love does not live here anymore.”

“No not like the cold moon no nothing like that but hot as in the sun and the rays can burn one out.”

“We live we earn and we learn.”

“We believe in our own destiny.”

How torments are made how not to behave how to believe in the future and what not to say to anyone who is unmade like me? I am without that goodness I am now filled to the brim with witticisms and sadness no longer a child but somehow this wit.

“Our destiny is our whole being.”

“Behave like a lady.”

“But I am not a lady.”

You are within inch of being sacked.

“I am so sorry.”

“We do not want John here?”

My lanterns have gone out.

“Yes the village of the whole ghostly mistakes we are now the gods fallen from our chariots and down our own homes.”

But what is the meaning of our mistakes why do we make them and what has happened to us when the mistake is what does it mean of course we are human and why are we no longer anything but the human goods gone cargo. Some sort of cargo has been lifted and we no longer have anything to say to other people but that we must do away with you sack you and be careful we are watching you.

“We have come down and shattered.”

“What have I done?”

“You are not like us.”

“Not like us normal doing the normal things and thinking in our guarded cage and all that not normal manners at all but somehow this disaster to behold how could you become such a destructive influence on this society?”

“We make our loins stink.”

Even they are shocked to the core to find themselves in such a despair and they did not even say worst things in the world are to have money or no money in the bank and to spend it.

“The whole world will watch us sink the institutions we are in.”

That is the very essence of what reasonable conduct is and why is it the truth because it is because that is how we are today. One can do anything but owe money to someone.

“The married couple were involved?”

“Do not ask.”

“We will break the banks with the disgrace.”

“But the thing is there is nothing the matter with me at all I am insane and not married and a husband would have known what to do about money.”

“Yes let me spend it.”

“Yes he did it well much better than anyone.”

His name when mating is a glutton and to cry out loud this makes his tell tales round the globe and laugh out loud with that naked greed. Sexy looks which means he is now the male to the throne in the game of thorns.

Make nettles stings and tell everyone he is your lost and fondness fondue does. He does will never be the same again.

Love dines alone waiting for him to come back home and he is at home now and he is with the Abdul watching me endlessly to see if I and Abdul were more than friends. I can see that he is not just fascinated but then mother is Abdul’s true mate so in disgust I revolt to the idea.

“Cheese everyone round and he is paying.”

But nobody wants to pay.

He actually paid for his own cheese. He did not play it close to his chest. I did not know he had the means to do that. I thought his hand never went inside his wallet. Tight you see. Mean tight? No too drunk to think it through.

Why did he just fall over? He took taken in by some door. He was telling the door to open when the door did not so he banged his head to it. I am thinking behind his wit. He did not mean to hurt his own head. He now is tearful. He is filled to the brim over following his sobs taken over by the cash and carry.

“Sobs he is sobbing made me write a poem his new Mrs said I should be paid 25 pounds for doing a great poem. Unlike her films poems do not make money.”

You see writing does not get you money certainly not your writing.

“She said let her live with that.”

“Poems twenty five time a go.”


“Woman you are not nice.”

“Tell that to the bank manager.”

“Get a job shit-bag.”

“I am a sick bag dear so I cannot get one.”

“I am in love with my husband.” She said in a hideous manner.

“Do so.”

I think she is holding onto him because she hates me more than him.

“Yes he is my husband.”

Sorry did she say something like the worst thing in life is when one is into satire and making fun of the gentleman and their wives as they are into maids or something.

“I am sorry but who conned who”?

“His name is I can’t remember but he is the husband. That we all must bear some name other than our own. That the names we carry is not to curry favour but that someone imposed themselves on to us and mated with us and made us the currying of favours. We loved we lived and then died. He dined outside and does not inflict pain because sex is about work. He thinks it does not afflict something inner about me he does not inflict it on purpose it is something he does and feels special with all his friends the hags the hags of Hollywood all his starry bedroom prattles and partners.

It is over rated what a man thinks he has a woman who is bisexual does not feel it she has this other system when it is good to be so sexy. The prattle is when there is this other person who does feel it and think of it as a joke they all do.”

“It is the waste of it all.”

“Waste of a good semen.”

“To feel for that nothing more than what one would for a mammal.”

“To think she is not ashamed to feel herself the odd number.”

“That he is there here inside us.”

“Spring fellow we got the wages.”

“Our money safe is in the safety of his hands. Our hands we know what to put it into. He has given me a bonus too.”

“A pound an hour they paid you a pound an hour.”

“It is serious when the man does not concentrate in one direction or the other I am going to melt down or kill him.”

“Eat now you feel better “.

“Nothing is the same with me nothing is the same them has it got the contracts the right conceits and he smiles on them. Good heads on their bras.”

“Yes I can see he is. He does look very like a cat.”

“Why he is purring?”

So now we are saying who hates or loves the man in front of us? Yes and we are going to quarrel over him until he does not exist anymore. One pulls this way the other that way are we not nice?

“He is fed and well clothed he never did look so good.”

“Look I am the wife.”

“Yes a specimen copy to be proud of.”

“He is well loved.”

“Yes he can be a pet.”

“Has he got his penis seen to?”

“What does that mean? I am expecting already.”

“Well not his is it?”

“Jane the virgin what she did it for?”

“Well it is not his he had the op.”

“What does it mean to me.?”

“Well divorce.”

“She was not unfaithful.”

“No she went to bed with someone else.”

“In the same bed with that husband and wife slept in?”

“So was technically in the same marriage bed.”

“Unlike poor Shakespeare who got a second bed to make love in because he had a delicacy of principle which formerly man did and had because of respect for their marriage vows.”

“The ten men decide to kill their lovers who came to the cafe with their penis and they sucked the boys dry. The ten men decide to murder their sweet males who did them wrong and they decide on this clever plan to give each other alibi’s so that the murders can be done. They did this in Lefka did the perfect crime giving each other’s alibi and they never caught. They never did get caught and they rampaging through the town and doing all this they murdered six boys and the man they hooked up with took the blame. One man especially. No one was safe when these lads had the hooker tendency. They blamed it on youth and drink. One man and another caught in bed and that was that. So many attacks no one safe at all.”

“It is a mad town?”

“No they are all poor as shit.”

“They want to get out of that town so that they can bring back colour into their lives. It was to escape the smell of cooking and over work.”

I can see we have chased him outside and he is away running for his life.

“So they do the murders for pay and they take off to Europe to paint the world red.”

“They do and all.”

Why should we care when we have the prenuptials?

“But six lads died and one man was killed for no reason and another was found in bed with his penis in his mouth so what has happened?”

“Dead he died?”

“Yes died in his sleep. With me the baby nearby I could not have done it. I was one years old.”

“How come this kid always is in there when a man’s penis is being hacked off?”

“Fuck off.”

Share out loudly he plain as plain wants you all the time and make the ex girls cry. Then nearby sales mans out when you wolf down his main cause. There is not much to ask round share out the wiles and the meanness which took over the coupled relationships. Couples do have the relationships.

It was not my fault there is a fault line wherever there is trouble I am in for it or with it and there is nothing the matter with me I am just in the middle of it.

It is the best part about them interactions. It is a revolting thought if you do not react to something that means? I do not know reacting means he or she is intense about you? Why no reality behind the things. No real means Coca cola.

The beastly younger wife has told his secrets. What he wants is a virgin. Now out all around the globe he is smarter than that. Like Jane the Virgin who is with a baby. Whose baby? Someone’s baby.

“This is a wild child.”

“Yes the wild child.”

“We can watch while he ditches his whole life.”

“This ends up as the Eds.”

“We dislike him right away.”

“Look his job is very hard.”

“Yes the grown up world seeks him out in order to give him a handshakes the darlings included.”

“Right said Fred.”

“He is not gay.”

“Right said Fred.”

“He has fried his own tomatoes.”

“In the human fat which is a old saying which is what we do bitterly in Turkish.”

“What a human in the frying pan.”

“Yes the pan was outside the door when he hit the van and left his manners behind.”

“He is high society.”

“What no Johnny Walker today.”

The lantern has moved on and on there is the spotlight on something else and it is all the same mirror images of the same disasters which have happened will happen and the hapless fools who misbelieve it might not happen again.

Look where is this moving along to? We have established that I am always in trouble and my life is one of tenseness and madness. The thinking behind this is when a person cannot spoil the whole show or can they?

“He can’t switch him on or off.”

“But the girls can and will do it for the other beings he left behind.”

Why did not you go with him?

“No such question did not belong there in the good old days I was a uneducated woman without much expertise at parties and did not love to be in the centre of attention.”

“What the whole group of girls will have our poor Jane.”

“Jane just glows in that kind of atmosphere.”

“Yes they want her.”

“This is for keeps?”

That is what he did wrong.

“They will keep her in a zoo.”

“I am with a cage and this is my cage which I live and work in.”

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