A Short Story
“Master, Master, please wake up,” said the low-demon, he shook the bed softly to not anger the sleeper.
Satan, no less, began to wake up. Feeling groggy as he did every morning, he rubbed his face and shook his horned head.
The low-demon, Timin, continued, “Master, Master, how may I serve you this glorious morning?”
Satan looked down to the foot of his gargantuan bed (twice as big as a normal king-size) and noticed Cerberus sleeping by his hoofs. He smiled to himself, not wanting to let his assistant see it.
“Good morning Cerby”, said Satan, calling the mythological dog by the pet name he gave it eons ago. “Let Cerberus out now,” Satan added with a growl.
To himself, Timin sighed, Ah yes, the wonderful task of taking this hideous creature for its morning walk. Timin had only been doing this for a short time, but all ready hated it. He often wondered if he was more worse off than the damned.
Timin clapped his three-fingered hands and instantly Cerberus’ leash appeared. The leash itself was about four feet long, and of course had three separate collars. Each collar was about a foot apart. In itself it was a heavy leash, made from chain-linked metal, with granite collars that molded themselves around the dog’s necks.
Timin grabbed the leash and once again forgot how heavy it was. It jerked his arm down as the leash came crashing to the floor. It made such a deafening noise he looked at the Devil and noticed his displeasure.
“Sorry Master,” said Timin humbly.
“Take the dog out now!” thundered Satan.
Quickly, Timin grabbed one of the collars and placed it over the Cerberus’ right head then placed a collar over the left head and paused. This was the one he did not like. The middle head was the most aggressive of the three. It was obvious this head was in control of the body. As the middle head snarled and snapped at him, Timin placed the collar on and pull the dog off the bed.
As Timin walked out of the room, he said, “If I may remind you greatly evil Master today is your daughter’s wedding. It will begin promptly at two.”
“Yes, yes, I know,” said Satan dismissively, “make sure all the guests are there. Now go!” He was still tired from waking up and felt annoyed by the reminder.
As Timin walked Cerberus to where he would tie it out, he looked at the dog with distaste. It had the body of a pit bull at twice the size with a dragon-like tail. Yet its heads were that of a rottweiller. Strange looking indeed.
Every morning it was the same, walk the dog as long as it liked, then allow it to roam the entrance of Hell. It was the Master’s orders. Satan wanted the newly damned to see the mythological dog. Noticing the expression of those coming down was interesting, seeing this creature only thought to exist in man’s imagination.
Timin knew it could take hours until this animal was satisfied walking, and also knowing he had the additional chore of making last minute wedding preparations, he decided to tie Cerberus out while he completed his other duties. Timin looked around and decided this spot was as good as any. After tying the leash to the ground he looked at the dog before leaving. Of the three heads the dog’s middle was truly what the creature was known for. The middle head was the most aggressive, it had a mean look to its eyes that brought chills to even the most treacherous of high-demons. That was something very difficult to do in Hell. Certainly, whenever the dog was unleashed upon some soul it was the middle head that took the most satisfaction in the hunt and torment.
Before leaving, Timin petted the outside heads nicely. He then looked at the middle head and quickly whacked it. The middle head lunged for Timin, but Timin disappeared, only to reappear just outside of the leash’s reach. Cerberus then ran at Timin but was stopped short of mauling him as the leash held and jerked the creature back. As he walked away, Cerberus’ middle head barked madly.
Timin simply laughed out loud as he went to his other duties.
Satan was getting dressed. With a wave of his pointy hand his office appeared around him and he began to look at the planet viewer. Sure enough, there were places where sun showers were occurring and others that looked like would definitely happen later.
Every time a daughter of mine gets married it the same old thing, sun showers on that accursed planet, he thought.
Another wave of his hand and his bedroom reappeared. He looked at himself in the mirror to adjust his clothes. Dressed in a flaming red body suit, he was a frightening sight, and with wings barely outstretched he was an imposing figure. Seven feet tall and as wide as a large gorilla, his wing span added another four feet each way. His face looked as anyone would expect: Fiery red eyes, and a large, oval face with the pointy goatee, the whole look topped off with two slightly curved horns protruding from his head and a short crop of red hair. The Devil also displays a completely muscular body, large biceps, washboard abdomen, and strong looking legs. Although he could change his appearance to look as anything, this was the one he preferred. It seemed to intimidate the damned more, and anything to that end he enjoyed.
Timin performed his duties. He received morning reports on the prior evening’s activities. For example, reports from higher demons assigned to the planet for human possession. These reports consisted of current possession status, compared with past status. Additionally, Timin received problem reports from throughout Hell. These ranged from inadequate heating in damnation areas, to reports of unacceptable work performance from apprentice to mid-level demons.
After collecting the reports, Timin put them in a summarized format. A package he could go over quickly, not wasting much of the Master’s time. Once finished he went to get the dog and then go to the house. Final wedding preparations would then begin.
One of the Devil’s favorite pleasures is meeting the newly damned. During the evening it was an order that all the newly damned be kept in a holding area until the next morning. With a quick hand-flick the exterior of the holding area appeared and he was greeted by a mid-demon.
“Master, great and evil, how may I serve you,” said the mid-demon.
Satan approached the view port, a one-way mirror of sorts that was unnoticeable from the inside. “How many arrived overnight?” he asked.
“In the thousands, Master,” said the mid-demon with glee.
Satan sighed and thought, Good help is truly hard to find. Can’t one demon simply count for me? Looking through the view port he quickly determined for himself there were a few hundred souls. A good night, indeed.
“I will enter now and address the damned,” said Satan. “Any new souls that arrive, send them to another holding area.”
“As you wish, Master.”
Satan began to feel the nervous rush that came prior to addressing a crowd. He did his best to hide it, not want any demons to know he suffered from stage fright. Satan enjoyed it though. He used it to give himself that edgy feeling which made for a good, terrifying speech.
Satan took a deep breath, calming himself, and slowly let it out; small jets of fire exited his nostrils. Before entering he took another peek into the holding area noticing the look on the damned souls. The frightened, guilty feeling of realizing they were in Hell for what they had done. The desperation the souls felt gave him an added courage and zeal as he smiled a little just before entering.
As Timin returned to where he had tied out Cerberus, a wave of terror filled him. Cerberus was not there! The anchor in the ground was there, the leash was there, even massive dog piles, but no dog. Timin picked up the leash and found, inexplicably, the granite collars were in their enlarged state, the size they normally were when the collar was not worn by the creature. Timin began to pace and panic then accidentally stepped in a dog pile, he looked down at his foot with disgust. Damn dog crap, he thought, as he angrily scrapped his foot on the ground. It didn’t help much. Dammit, it stinks like Hell. He continued looking around frantically where the dog had been, carefully avoiding the land mines.
How am I going to explain this? he thought. How’d the collar’s become large all of a sudden? Oh no, what will Satan do to me? I gotta find that dog, were could he have gone? Ok, Ok, think...Yes! I’ll check the entrance of Hell, if he’s not there I check the house. That damned dog’s got to be at either place, got-to.
Timin ran like a man possessed to the entrance of Hell.
Satan waved his hand and he appeared inside the holding area. It was a room with no visible doors or windows, no apparent way to get in or out. The room would configure itself depending on the amount of souls in it. It made itself as small as possible to keep every soul close together, keeping everyone cramped. Several souls gasped as others screamed when they the fallen angel materialized before them.
Satan stood with his wings slightly outstretched, muscles bugling, and a menacing smile across his face. Small jets of fire continued to let from his nostrils as he snarled and spoke.
“Welcome damned souls, forget all hope of ever leaving. Become prepared for an eternity of damnation.” He looked around the room to take in the horror on their faces. Some souls began to shake in fear, others began to cry. This was ecstasy for him and he began to enjoy it more.
“Cease the noise. There is no use in complaining, no one here cares. Your actions on the accursed planet have led you here. Now you must pay the consequences for how you led your pitiful lives,” shouted Satan. “I will allow one question from everyone if they choose to ask. After that, all of you will begin your torment.”
One soul in the middle of the room rose trembling and asked, “Uh, I don’t think I belong here. I led a decent life. I haven’t killed anyone or anything, there must be a mistake.”
Satan wanted to smile wider, but suppressed it. There’s always one in every group. With a snap of his fingers a book appeared. It floated in the air in front of the Devil, chest height.
“Your name?” said Satan.
“William Gaits,” said the soul. He thought and added, “William Earl Gaits.”
Satan referenced his book and found the listing. “Ah yes, Mr. William, E for Earl, Gaits. Seems like you screwed old ladies out of their retirement money, paid for sex using prostitutes, and you beat your wife and young children quite often. Let’s see...three or four times a week.” The book closed shut and disappeared.
Satan stared at Mr. Gaits soul and continued, “It seems to me you deserve to be here, more so, than some others. You’ll have to pay for those acts, no question. Your eternal damnation will consist of daily beatings from apprentice and lower level demons, in addition to new friends with benefits, the kinds you won’t enjoy, but they sure will.” Satan added the last statement with a jeering tone.
Gaits’ soul looked around in fear and embarrassment, saw the tell-tale look of judgment in the eyes of the other souls. “All of you looking at me as if you’re innocent? Look around you, we’re all in Hell!” His voice shrilled at the end.
“Satan or no Satan, I’m not staying here,” continued Gaits, making his way out of the row he sat in. “I’ve done nothing wrong, what’s been said is all a lie. I want out now!” The soul reached a wall and began to touch and punch different parts, searching for a hidden lever or anything to get out of the holding area.
Satan watched and laughed out loud, a hideous laugh that caused the other souls to hunker down instinctively.
Apparently he thinks there must be some sort of hidden door—idiot.
“Enough fool. There is no way out of this room or Hell. Your sins went un-repented, and now even here you deny the truth. How easy it is for me to get souls! You idiots can’t realize alive, or dead, the way to salvation.”
The prince of darkness paused for a moment allowing his face to contort to a hideous shape. It was so frightening, many souls looked away.
“Now Gaits, for your insolent actions you will suffer the pain of eternal fire!” thundered Satan. He pointed at the damned soul and fire shot from his extended finger, engulfing Gaits. Gaits began to scream in pain and agony as he began eternity, forever burning. Satan then called out, “Come, take him away now, and the others.”
A mid-demon entered in the shape of a dark, shadowy creature, it growled eagerly as it grabbed Gaits and disappeared through the wall.
More shadowy creatures entered, each one grabbing a soul as the soul screamed in terror, not knowing where they were going or what to expect.
Satan stayed and watched the last of the souls taken away. He smiled to himself and was pleased. Looking down at his watch he noticed it would be time to meet Timin and go over the morning reports. He frowned at this thought, but smiled inside knowing he’d see his pet. With a wave of his hand he was gone.
Timin went to the Hell’s entrance and much to his horror the dog was not there. Running late and fearing the worst with resignation he ran back to meet Satan. He hurried knowing quite well he could not keep Satan waiting. He entered the evil master’s office and found him already waiting impatiently.
Oh no, I’m gonna get it now, thought Timin.
“Sorry to keep you waiting, king of all darkness, but collecting the reports took longer than normal today,” said Timin. He bowed his head timidly hoping Satan would accept the excuse.
“This is the first time you’ve kept me waiting,” snarled Satan, “don’t let it happen again. Get on with it.”
“Yes my Master,” replied Timin. The low-demon then proceeded to review the data collected.
During the presentation Satan tried to concentrate, but it was the same thing everyday. Problems ranging from insufficient torment to unacceptable work performance. These things did not interest him that’s why he had mid- and higher level demons do the work. Yet, he kept listening and making sure not to miss anything that would need his attention. His mind began to wander as the day’s report was apparently mundane.
Where is Cerby? Cerberus is usually here begging for a treat. Not only did this idiot demon keep me waiting but he forgot my dog.
Interrupting Timin in mid-sentence, Satan asked annoyed , “Where in all Hell is Cerberus?” The evil master sat straighter in his chair as he completed the question.
Timin hesitated slightly then answered, “Master, my deepest apologies. In my haste to make this meeting with you, I forgot to bring your beloved pet. Please forgive me great, evil Master.”
Staring at Timin straight in the eye, Satan let out small jets of fire from his nostrils. Timin knew this meant he was very unhappy. Bracing for the worst, all Timin could do was stair back with a blank expression.
“Bring me my dog at once!” yelled Satan, then sitting back in his chair as if to say ‘I’m waiting’.
Timin tried desperately not to look panicked. Quickly he thought, Should I tell him the truth? Should I tell him I let the dog roam around and torment some souls…? No, he won’t buy that. Timin stole a glance at his watch and noticed the time, half past noon. The wedding is coming, bring up the wedding!
“My evil Master, I would at this time, except the wedding will begin soon.” The low-demon pointed to his watch.
Satan looked at the clock hanging in his office. Sure enough, the time was coming.
“Master, if you remember my great evilness, you requested I make sure all the appropriate guests attend, I must leave now to do so. I also recall you wanted to have that talk with your daughter.”
Satan nodded in agreement, Yes, I do want to speak with her and I do have to get dressed and all.
“Very well, leave now and complete the preparations,” said Satan. He paused for a moment and added, “Then bring the dog to the wedding.”
“Master, are you sure you want Cerberus at the wedding? I mean, with all the guests and food?” said Timin, a slight strain to his voice.
“Fool, do you dare question me?” thundered Satan.
“No great evil Master, I was only thinking about the wedding preparations,” said Timin, his head bowed in fear.
“Don’t think, insolent demon, just do as I say or you will face the consequences,” said Satan, eyes bulging in anger. “Complete your work and bring the dog to the wedding!”
“Yes my Master. May I leave now?”
“Go now before I do something to you. Go!”
Timin had literally bolted from the room shaking in fear. Whew! That was close. What am I going to do? How am I going to complete the wedding preparations AND find that damned dog? Timin ran faster after deciding to go to the damnation areas where he knew Cerberus had frequented.
Satan paused for a moment as he watched Timin depart. Another wedding...How many does this make now? He was somewhat tired of the thought. He realized that with so many daughters and each having had a wedding, he had simply stopped counting eons ago. Satan turned his chair around, to face the wall behind his desk. There he used his Hell Monitor finding the current bride. Satan saw his daughter, Natasha, was with her wedding party. With a wave of his hand his office disappeared and the wedding party and daughter appeared in place.
A small feeling of pride entered the Devil as he saw his daughter getting ready; she did not notice he had appeared yet. Natasha was not a good-looking Devil’s daughter, none of Satan’s daughters were. Since Satan mated with whom he pleased, there was no telling if this daughter was the offspring of an incestuous romance or otherwise. This made for some hideous birth defects. In Natasha’s case she had bad facial disfigurement: One eye larger than another and placed slighly higher, a big, protruding chin, squashed nosed, and an sunken forehead. Otherwise, the rest of her looked fine.
Natasha had finally noticed her father and said, “Oh Dada, it’s so nice to see you!” She ran to the tormenter of the world and hugged him.
“Nice to see you honey,” said Satan, and not wanting to waste time he quickly added, “Order your servants to give us some privacy?”
“Of course Dada,” she said lovingly to her father, then turned and growled, “Go now slaves! Return immediately when I say.”
The way she said it made Satan feel good. Spoken like a true daughter, he thought.
“Natasha, I’ve been meaning to have a talk with you about something.” He noticed she was listening intently.
“Oh Dada, you’re not going to talk to me about the ‘birds n’ the bees’?” said Natasha. “Are you?” She tried to hold back a giggle.
“No, not at all. I know you’ve done what is expected of a daughter of mine. I’m sure you know all about how to mate and with whom. No, I’m here to talk to you about something different. Something I’m going to give you.” He saw Natasha began listening more closely now.
“I want you and your servant to start off right. I am giving you an area in the lower portion of Hell as yours, to control any way you like. You will start with a hundred souls as slaves, and another hundred for torment.”
“Oh Dada, thank you, thank you! TWO HUNDRED SOULS, I’ve never had that many. Thank you, Dada.” Natasha was hanging from his shoulders.
“It’s up to you if you decide to do something different with the souls, say, have more to torment and less as slaves,” said Satan in a fatherly tone.
“Yes Dada yes. Something to consider once my servant and I settle in. Thank you so very much.” Natasha paused for a moment and with fire bristling around her eyes she added, “You’re the best.”
The king of darkness simply hugged his daughter. Even crying she still looked ugly, but it was a face this father loved.
Having been to the three damnation areas Timin still had not found Cerberus. The low-demon’s panic stricken feeling grew larger by the moment. Where could that dog be? He had even tried listening for the tell tale signs that the dog was around: Shouts of fear or pain from damned souls, or heck, even from apprentice demons.
He consulted higher demons in the area asking about the dog...
“Have you seen Cerberus around here?” Timin would ask a higher demon.
“Nope, haven’t seen that pest…Why?” a higher demon would reply curiously suspicious. Then with amusement had added, “You lost the dog? Ha! Are you gonna get it, it’s been nice knowing you Timin.”
“No, no, I haven’t lost him,” Timin would reply annoyed. “I’ve just forgotten where I left him. You know, with having to take care of the wedding preparations and all.” Timin added lying.
“Yeah, sure. If I see the dog I’ll let you know, but it’ll cost ya,” replied the higher demons.
Timin was not only being tormented by the dog’s disappearance, but if found by something else, he’d surely have to pay a favor to get the dog back.
Exasperated, he decided to try one more place. The time for the wedding was near and he’d soon have to quit looking for Cerberus. He went to the river Styx. It was the only place in Hell where there was water and Timin was hoping the dog had not eaten or drank yet. It could very well be the only place to find him.
Unlike what was believed on the accursed planet, there was a river, a moat really separating Hell from the world of the living. Satan had ordered it placed there eons ago. It was six miles wide, six miles deep, and it was another six miles from the Hell side of the river to the entrance. Of course, to add more fright, Satan ordered higher-demon to as a ‘ferryman’, bringing the newly-arrived-damned across the river. During all crossings, the demon acted as a tour guide explaining the design of the river and reminding souls the hopelessness of their situation. This demon then forced souls to march to the entrance, where he turned them over to another demon, and then returned back for more damned souls. This ‘ferryman’ was known as Charon, he looked almost as intimidating as Satan himself. Charon was not as large or muscular looking as Satan but he did have a horned head and large wings. What distinguished him from the lord of the underworld (and other demons for that matter) was the huge double-hammer he carried. The hammer was simply a thick metal bar which held two concrete blocks at one end, it looked worn and had rough edges, had both fresh and dried blood on it, and was absolutely dirty-disgusting from centuries of use. Charon always carried it. He used it to silence souls if they spoke up during his tour.
Having seen ferryman, and it looked like he was getting ready to go back across, Timin opened his mouth to call him when he noticed something: Dog crap! Not just one pile but several huge piles.
Might Cerberus be with Charon, Timin thought anxiously. Other than Satan, this was the only other demon the dog liked. Carefully avoiding the piles, Timin reached Charon quickly.
“Charon, old buddy, how are you?” said Timin.
Charon turned around, then realizing who it was just grunted a response.
“Having a busy day today? Anyway, sorry to bother you, but have you seen Cerberus around here?”
“You saw the dog piles,” snorted Charon, “there’s only one dog around here, must be him.”
“I know, I know, just hoping the dog was with you,” replied Timin.
“Cerby was. Played with him for a while. Told him to wait for me here, but when I returned he was gone.” A look of dismay crossed the ferryman’s face.
“Damn, you had the dog? Why didn’t you just take him with you?”
“Are you crazy? That dog would have made the trip back impossible. Besides, I didn’t want to take a chance of that dog falling into the river”. He shuddered at a thought and added, “Imagine that dog drowning, or one of the outside heads unable to bark for nine years. Satan then finds out it’s my fault. No way!”
Good point, thought Timin, nodding in agreement. It’d only take one head to drown and kill the entire animal. It was strange though how the middle head could drink from the river unaffected as others were not, even higher demons.
“So you have no idea where the dog went?” asked Timin.
“All right, thanks anyway Charon, sorry to have bothered you,” replied Timin. He then schlepped away. With no sign of Cerberus all he could do now was finish last minute preparations for the wedding then face Satan’s wrath for not bringing the dog.
If I only had more time, Timin thought.
He then heard something…He heard it again…A bark! Then another one, another one, and more. Cerberus was at the entrance. Timin ran the last few yards to the entrance but saw nothing.
Damn, that dog.
Feeling hopeless again, he turned to make his way in when something growled. Timin spun around and saw Cerberus standing there only a few feet away, looking as menacing as ever.
How sweet a sight it was.
”Ah, ha!” said Timin, trying to contain his excitement. “There you are you piece of crap dog. Come to daddy.”
Timin reached in the air as if grabbing the dog’s collar and stopped. The collar! I left it where I tied him out this morning! Without the collar there was no way to contain the beast, and worst yet, the collar was his only defense from being mauled.
Timin smiled nervously as he took a few steps back. Cerberus, still growling with drool oozing out of his mouth, took a few steps forward. The dog began to sense Timin was at a disadvantage.
Although Timin was only a lower-demon, he had been working on his spell casting abilities. He desperately hoped he could conjure the collar, because if he couldn’t, this mutt was going to have him for lunch. Still smiling at the dog, Timin recited some long forgotten Latin phase and then snapped his fingers.
He tried it again…nothing.
Cerberus now to took two steps closer for each one Timin took back.
Fearing the dog was about to pounce, Timin shrieked, “Dammit, I need the collar!”
It appeared just as the dog lunged for him. The low-demon side-stepped the lunge then grab the floating collar. As he and the dog turned to face each other, Cerberus motioned to attack again but did not. The dog quickly recognized the collar in Timin’s hand.
“Having second thoughts are we?” said Timin sarcastically and with a laugh.
The low-demon teased the dog with the collar, enjoying his moment of victory. There was no place for the dog to go now. The entrance to Hell was closed and Charon was probably on the other side of the river. It was just Timin and Cerberus.
Just then, the black metal gates of Hell began to open. An apprentice demon was coming out.
What for? Why now?!!
“Close those doors, you idiot!” yelled Timin.
“Forgive me low-demon Timin, but I was asked to find you,” said the apprentice. “It’s time to complete the wedding preparations.”
Cerberus saw his opportunity and took it. Barking and growling insanely the dog ran toward the door, it scared the apprentice leaving the entrance wide open. Cerberus entered Hell at full bore with Timin trying to reach from behind. Unfortunately for Timin he crashed into the apprentice as the apprentice was trying to see which way the dog ran. A bit groggy from butting horned-heads, Timin got up and staggered. Blurry-eyed, Timin looked in the direction the dog had run but didn’t see or hear anything.
The dog was gone – again.
Turning furiously around to face the apprentice he found it was still on the floor.
“You idiot, do you have any idea of how long I’ve been looking for that dog?” snapped Timin. “I told you to close that door, you didn’t, and now the dog is gone. You’re gonna pay…”
In the heat of the moment Timin conjured another spell. With the rage and fury of a mad man he pointed at the apprentice – a lightning bolt shot from his index finger vaporizing the apprentice where it lay. The very next second Timin was mad at himself. He jumped and turned around angrily as he thought, Damn, why did I DO that? I just destroyed the only proof that I had the dog. Dammit! I always do this to myself.
He looked at the floor dismayed, then shaking his head and cursing under his breath, he ran in the direction the dog had gone.
After meeting his daughter, Satan returned to his room to get dressed and ready. With a snap of his fingers smaller bird-sized demons appeared, mini-demons, and began to groom him as he got dressed. These mini-demons buzzed around him cutting his hair, manicuring his nails, and plucking hair from unwanted areas. All the while they did not disturb the Masters movements or his actions of putting his clothes on. When finished, Satan stood in front of the mirror and looked at himself, he was pleased and nodded. The mini-demons waited, floating at attention by his side.
“Instead of the parted look,” said Satan, as he turned away from the mini-demons, “I want my hair slicked back.”
The demons instantly took charge and change his hair style. Once done they again waited at attention. Satan looked in the mirror, and was pleased even more at how he looked.
With a snap of his fingers he said, “Be gone.” The mini-demons popped from existence.
Although he was the tormentor of the world, he was good dresser. Satan decided to dress himself in his favorite party suit – a shiny, black tuxedo. The tuxedo had a tail to it, extra long. He also wore black patent-leather shoes, for the hoofs which were now feet, and large, golden cuff links shaped in the letter ‘S’. Satan topped it all off by wearing fluorescent-green sunglasses, it gave him a festive look.
Suddenly realizing Timin had not returned, annoyed Satan, but he shrugged it off when he remembered Timin was not really needed at the wedding. Glancing at a clock he saw the wedding was almost ready to start. With another wave of his hand he appeared at the wedding’s location.
It seemed as if everyone was there, At least Timin got the job done. Now where is my dog? Satan looked around carefully hoping to find his beloved monster racing to him, but no. Satan’s thoughts changed to Timin, and with irritation, he again wondered where the low-demon was.
His distraction was interrupted when his daughter said, “Daddy, you ready? We’re all here, come on, let’s go!” The king of darkness heard the excitement in her voice.
“Yes, Natasha, I’m ready,” said Satan, as he put out his arm for his ugly daughter to take.
The wedding was held outside since there were hundreds of guests. These included damned souls that worshipped him when alive to higher-demons who performed well during the past few centuries. At first blush it looked like any normal wedding but upon closer examination it is far from it. Although the bride was being walked down the isle by her father, and a ‘groom’ waited at the front that’s where the similarities ended. The bride was not dressed in white, she had chosen short, red dress made out of sequins. She carried no bouquet and wore no veil, Natasha did not want her hair messed since she had kinked sexily. The ‘groom’ was no groom at all, he was really a mid-demon chosen by Natasha to be her first servant. It would be the first of many has she built up her own harem. And the ‘priest’ was simply a higher-level demon used to stand in the role.
All the preparation for this, a few minutes of ceremony, Satan thought to himself as he sighed.
“Do you, servant-demon, promise to obey you new master for all time?” said the high-demon acting as the priest.
“I do,” replied the servant-demon.
“Do you gracious daughter of our evil Master promise to subjugate your servant to your every wish?” continued the fake priest.
“I do,” replied Natasha, as a smile crossed her ugly face and she stared at her servant-demon with wanting eyes.
“Then by the privilege vested in me by our great, evil Master, tormentor of the world, the king of darkness, the ruler of the underworld, I now pronounce you master and servant.” The high-demon then softly pushed both Natasha and her servant closer and added, “You may now do as you wish.”
Natasha and her servant were about to take their clothes off, when out of the blue, barking was heard. It got louder and louder, and came closer and closer…
Bursting into the wedding was Cerberus. The monster-dog ran madly into guests and jumped on them. The scene became total pandemonium while closely behind and harried was Timin.
“You damned animal, come back here!” yelled Timin.
The dog darted away from Timin then continued running around and through guests.
“Ah! Get it off me!” one guest exclaimed.
“Shoo, Shoo!” yelled another.
All the commotion made the beast more excited, its heads barking wildly. Guests were now trampling over each other trying to get away from the creature, chairs were toppling and damned souls and demons alike falling over each other. Through all this, Timin stalked the dog creeping closer and closer until he lunged, collar in hand. Cerberus tried to run but the low-demon grabbed for its tail. Got it! As the dog dragged him, Timin toppled over several chairs and guests, while trying to reign the dog closer.
“There you go,” said Timin, thrusting the collar onto the middle head. “How do you like this?” The collar went on rough pulling at the ears – Cerberus let out a monstrous yelp quieting the room in an instant.
Satan had seen enough. He shoved Timin violently, throwing him away several feet away, then knelt down to hold Cerberus, “Now, Now, what’s wrong? Did the bad demon hurt you Cerby?” Satan turned looking for Timin and shot him a deadly, fiery glare.
“Master, Master,” said Timin nervously, standing and favoring his right leg, “the dog got out of its leash somehow and I’ve been chasing him all day.”
“YOU’VE BEEN CHASING HIM ALL DAY?” thundered Satan. “AND YOU KEPT THIS, FROM ME?”
“Master, Master, I did not want to worry you. I knew the dog was somewhere, just not exactly.”
“You LIED to ME? You insolent fool.” Satan paused for a moment, all eyes were on him. Demons and damned souls were moving away from him – even leaving the ceremony – they could tell something bad was going to happen. The tormenter of the world then noticed his daughter was upset and that made him angrier. He looked Timin straight in the eyes with a smile beginning at the corners of his mouth.
At once Timin was chained to the ground, spread-eagle.
Satan stood holding Cerberus then said, “Cerby, looks like you haven’t eaten today.” As he tossed the dog softly to the ground he added, “Have at it boy!” The monstrous dog ran from Satan, a look of victory on its faces with a more crazed expression from its middle head.
Nothing was heard other than the dogs growls and snorts – Satan had silenced Timin’s screams.
“I’m sorry for the interruption folks,” said Satan, as he led everyone into the reception area. “Let’s continue with the festivities.”
Good help is so hard to create,thought Satan. Before bed I’ve got to conjure up another assistant…Damn, it’s going to be a long night. He glanced over his shoulder at Cerberus picking away at what was left of Timin.
“Master, Master, please wake up,” said the low-demon softly.
Satan awoke feeling pleased, So far so good.
Not to disturb Cerberus, Satan slowly raised his legs, got off, and waved his hand. Both him and the low-demon appeared in his office.
“Keahi, do you remember your orders from last night?” said Satan. He said it in a surprisingly soothing tone.
“Yes, I believe so my great, evil Master,” said Keahi. Noticing Satan waited for more he continued, “Every morning take Cerberus out, bring him back, and then gather the evening reports.”
Satan smiled, Good, very good. I think I finally got it right. Satan then sat in his office chair please with himself and returned to character, “Be gone with you, don’t be late for the report!”
“Yes my great, evil Master.” And quickly, off Keahi went.
Satan leaned back in his chair, relaxing for a moment before starting the day. He began psyching himself up getting ready for the welcome of the newly arrived damned. Suddenly, a moment of realization hit him. He sprang up from his chair, disbelief swirling around in his mind.
Now I know why I’ve lost so many assistants! thought Satan. I keep forgetting to tell them never to leave Cerberus tied out, only walk him. The dog can get out of his collars. Each head pulls on a collar, until they’re all loose!
“Might as well save this assistant, avoid me a later hassle,” he sighed. Satan then waved his hand quickly and disappeared.
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