I lie beneath my bed covers with wet tears staining my cheeks. I stopped crying about Rolan ages ago, these tears are from the pain of the freshly formed black marks on my stomach. They appeared about half an hour after...everything happened. I did take painkillers but they don’t seem to be helping at all.
Other than the pain in my stomach, I feel numb. Actually numb isn’t the right word. Numb implies that I feel something but I don’t, maybe empty is a better word. I’m so stupid, so god-damn stupid. I should have ended things the first time I saw him fooling around. I just don’t understand why he would ask me out on a date and then still mess about like that. He truly has perplexed me. My phone beside me pings, the screen lighting up. A message from my group chat with Becka, Kaiko and Carma.
Why didn’t u tell me!I would have kicked his ass!🤬
I thought we agreed with asking if she was alright first.🙄
It’s ok, Mae. We can go get cake and pretty dresses for ourselves.🙃
I choose to ignore them, though I’m happy that they care about me. The door bell downstairs rings but I ignore that as well. It’s probably Rolan coming to talk his bullshit in my face again, I kiss my teeth.
“Hello!” A voice calls from downstairs. “It’s, uh, me, Vrey!” The person says. Alarm bells go off in my head, how the fuck did she get inside? “Mae?” The door to my bedroom opens and in walks Vrey. “Oh, there you are.” She says smiling, vibrant green eyes shining with happiness.
“How did you get inside?” I ask.
“Oh,” She says giggling a little to herself, “Magic.” She says in a sing-songy voice, twiddling her fingers in the air, blue sparks snaking around the tips of them as she does.
“Right.” I say. Normally something like this would blow my mind but my mind is not in the right state at this moment in time.
“I, um, heard what happened.” Vrey says.
“Ugh.” I groan, “Who hasn’t?”
Vrey laughs and says, “Well even if there weren’t all these videos, and there are a lot, I still would’ve known. I mean...” she says laughing to herself again, “There’s not much you can keep from a psychic.”
“Your psychic?” I say. Vrey nods in answer.
“But don’t worry. I don’t like, see everything. I’m not creeping in on your life or anything like that. I can choose to see stuff I want unless it’s something really, really, really, really, really-”
“Vrey.” I say, looking at her pointedly.
“Sorry,” She says laughing, “I got carried away. Unless it’s something important.” She finishes.
“Oh.” Is all I can say.
“I just wanted to know if you were...ok?” Vrey asks.
“I’m fine.” I say, though the wobble in my voice at the end of my sentence indicates I’m not. Vrey looks almost apologetic as she comes to give me a hug, like it’s her fault I’m hurting.
The hug that is supposed to bring comfort instead brings agonising pain that leaves me screaming as the lines of my stomach and arms throb and pulse.
“Mae, oh my goddess, Mae!” Vrey shouts as she stands by my bedside.
“I-I’m fine.” I pant.
“No, no your not.” She says. “What’s wrong?” She asks but I just shake my head. Vrey’s eyes glow for all but a split second before she starts speaking, “I’m so sorry. I should have known.”
“It’s okay.” I say as multiple tears trickle down my face. Vrey wipes them away with the pad of her thumb, tenderly stroking my cheeks. “Ssh. Don’t cry.” She says.
“Why is this happening to me? I’ve done nothing wrong!” I cry out.
“It’s not your fault at all, if anyone’s to blame, it’s Rolan.” Vrey says, “he knows what happens when...” She stops there, unknowing of how to finish her sentence.
“But why am I hurting?” I wail as another wave of pain hits me.
“It’s a sort of guilt trip.” Vrey says. “When a mate sees their other half in pain it messes with their head.” She explains, hand still stroking my cheek like a mother does to comfort their child.
“That’s so unfair. I’ve literally done nothing wrong.” I exclaim.
“Yeah, I know.” Vrey says, agreeing, “but it’s a way to ensure that person doesn’t keep on cheating. I mean hurting yourself is one thing but hurting someone you love and care for is completely different.” All I can do is cry as more waves of agonising pain racks through my body.
“It’s odd though. Normally stuff like this can’t happen to you since you haven’t been marked yet. Physically, that is anyway.” Vrey says with furrowed eyebrows.
“What do you mean, Vrey?” I ask, completely lost.
“Well the only other way something like this could happen is if you’ve already spiritually marked Rolan but that never usually happens first. It’s normally goes physical mark and then spiritual mark.” Vrey explains, like she’s talking about the most normal thing in the world.
“Huh?” I say. She laughs at my confused expression, finding it amusing. I suddenly feel slightly embarrassed, I must sound so ignorant.
“It’s when your literal soul, accepts its other half.”
“Sounds like voodoo.” I say with wide eyes. Vrey laughs.
“Voodoo. Lol.” She says giggling.
“It normally happens at random and goes completely unnoticed by most which is probably why you didn’t realise.” She says after a couple minutes of laughing to herself.
“Didn’t think a soul could even reject its other half.” I comment.
“Well, if my mate was a psychotic murderer , I don’t know about you, but I would run for the hills and then keep running.” Vrey says, “The physical mark strengthens the mate bond but the spiritual mark solidifies it.” She finishes.
“Right.” I say, trying to give the impression that I understand everything she just said.
The room settles into a comfortable silence as we both relax and take the time to gather our thoughts. Have I really accepted Rolan that quickly? That thought alone scares me. Somewhere deep down I must truly love him for my literal soul to have accepted him. I take a sharp intake of breath. Did I really just say love? I shake my head. I don’t love him not after what he’s done. I couldn’t love him,no, I refuse to. I would constantly be wondering if he’d stay loyal to me, constantly wondering whether I am good enough for him. I laugh, I am so not good enough for him. What would it matter to him if I suddenly wasn’t in his life? Nothing, that’s what. He’s got by without the other half of his soul so far, why would he need it in the future? But the same is true with me, I’ve gotten by without the other half of my soul this far as well, I don’t need him either.
“Vrey.” I say, breaking the quiet, “Did, did you know Rolan was messing about?” Silence follows but her reaction tells me all I need to know as tears begin to form in my eyes.
“You did, didn’t you. God, I’m so stupid. You all did. George, Thomas, all of you.” I think back to the times I saw them looking at each other with pity in their eyes.
“Mae, I...” Vrey begins.
“Why didn’t you say something?” I say, my voice becoming scratchy as tears fall from my eyes. “Instead of just letting me look like a fool.”
“Mae, we couldn’t tell you. There was a chance that you could never get back with Rolan. We couldn’t-”
“There wasn’t a chance I’d get back with Rolan. There isn’t a chance.” I state clearly.
“Mae, if you break up with Rolan, you’re not just breaking up with Rolan. There’s a whole pack-”
I interrupt, ” I really don’t want to hear your bullshit right now, okay, I’ve been put through enough. I’m tired and I wanna sleep, so please get out.” I say calmly though I raging inside.
“Mae, please, just listen.” Vrey says, pleading with me.
“No!” I shout, “I don’t want to hear anymore!I’m done, so done!” Tears stream down my face and I am unable to stop them.
Vrey goes to comfort me but I back away and say, “Don’t. Just go.”
“I’m so sorry, Mae.” Vrey says before she leaves. I hear the front door shut and I am once again left by myself.
I sigh, so many apologies, not one of them meaning a damn thing.
A/N: I just wanted to say thank you for reading this far! I love hearing your comments and seeing that you guys are enjoying the story, it really does make me happy. Next update will be next Sunday.