The Heart of an Alpha

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The life of an Alpha was full of hardships, this she knew, but what was to become of her life, she never could have imagined. Vivian was to become the Alpha female of one of the largest packs in the world due to an arranged matehood set up by the elders when she was just three years old. The Alpha, while a good male, was much older and was disinterested in her in every way. So when he mated another female against the elder's wishes, Vivian was secretly relieved. Years pass and Vivian was able to enjoy a childhood knowing she would never have to shoulder the burden of being an Alpha, but her relief was short lived. Upon the unwanted Alpha female's untimely death, now of age, Vivian was once again thrust into the arrangement. Now, not only must she mate the heartbroken Alpha who had a determined disregard for her, she was also to become step-mother to his two motherless sons. Despite everything, she finds strength in her losses, and becomes loved and cherished by her pack. Some were born to lead, and she was born to be an Alpha.

Fantasy / Drama
5.0 11 reviews
Age Rating:

Chapter 1

A/N: This is a Companion Book to Blood Moon.

As a companion book, there will be time skips and the flow may overall appear choppy, as it is showing a different perspective on events in the timeline of Blood Moon.

If you are reading Blood Moon this has major spoilers. Don't read this until after you have reached Ch.11 in Blood Moon.

WARNING: Book contains violence, abuse, language, trigger warnings, strong sexual content and material that may be distressing to some audiences. Themes of male dominance, and characters who are half-beast and react to situations unlike a human would in certain circumstances (violence, sex, etc.).


Vivian stared at herself in the full-length mirror. Her expression was far from happy.

“Stop looking so upset. You should feel honored the Alpha has chosen you.” Elodie’s voice spoke from behind her. Vivian sighed and turned around to look into her mother’s smiling face.

“But... he didn’t, not really,” Vivian replied with another frown. Elodie’s smile faded and her expression turned stern.

“How many times am I to tell you? You were to be his true mate. He chose you long before that wild bitch stole him away. If you ask me, she got what she deserved. Luck has been on our-” Elodie began.

“Luck? He lost her, mother... He’s grieving. It hasn’t even been a month. This isn’t right, he doesn’t want m-” Vivian began, but she cut off abruptly from the sharp pain on her cheek. Vivian brought her hand up to the side of her face and looked at her mother in shock.

“He chose you over all your sisters. Should I remind you? We lost our pack, my child.. and you are our last chance to give our family the proper status we deserve in this one. Do not disappoint me.” Her mother growled. Vivian felt the tears start to well before she could stop them.

“I’m sorry,” Vivian said. Her mother’s stern expression softened, and she gently cupped her face.

“No... I’m sorry,” Elodie said as she leaned in to gently kiss her forehead.

“You are never to speak of these doubts again, do you understand?” Elodie said firmly. Vivian nodded slightly. Elodie gently nudged Vivian, and she turned back around to face the mirror so her mother could finish her hair.

“You will make him want you. Look at you... you’re stunning, far more fetching than that other female. If your father was still alive... he would be so proud of you.” Elodie said as she gently adjusted the flowers in her sandy-blonde hair. Vivian forced a smile.

Silence settled over them as Elodie continued her work. Vivian glanced away from her reflection as she tried hard to keep the frown from her face. She heard her mother sigh behind her.

“I know you don’t feel ready... but none of us ever do. You will make a fine mate and mother. Remember, you will have sons after tonight. Concentrate on his needs and his pup’s... and he is certain to love you.” Elodie said reassuringly. Vivian still said nothing. She had barely turned eighteen, she didn’t want this, especially not to a male who had so freshly lost his mate, one she was certain he loved. For as long as she could remember, she was told she’d be the Alpha’s mate, and she’d been schooled and prepared from early on to be the next Alpha female of the Ruguru.

Then suddenly six years earlier, she was told the arrangement was broken because the Alpha took another mate. Other than the fact that it had infuriated her family, Vivian was happy for it. Giles had barely paid any attention to her in the few times she’d met him and even at her young age, she felt the massive amount of pressure lifted.

In the subsequent years, she was almost carefree, even though her mother never ceased coaching her for Alphahood. Elodie insisted she be prepared, just in case. But aside from that, Vivian thought she’d have a choice in her mate, she even had a few that she was considering...

Then Mya died.

Three weeks earlier, not even a day after Mya’s death, the Elder’s council paid her family a visit, and her mother was overjoyed.

Vivian was not.

“You’re sisters will be here soon. Clear the redness from your eyes.. and do not stay up here long.” Elodie said once she was finished with her hair. Vivian glanced behind her and watched her leave the room.

With a deep frown, she looked back at her reflection and stared at herself. She cast a brief glance around her now empty room, before she turned to follow her mother downstairs.


Vivian sat through all the well-wishing feeling rather numb. The union ceremony was short and very modest, and she was glad for it because she wouldn’t have been able to keep it together otherwise.

The gathering only consisted of their direct family members, and some close friends, along with the Elder’s council and their families. Although it still would have been considered a large wedding by human standards, for an Alpha of Giles stature... the ceremony was exceptionally small.

Giles, even though he sat beside her, hadn’t once cast her a single glance. Vivian chanced a small glance at him and noticed he hadn’t touched any of his food either. She frowned.

“I’m tired.” A small voice from beside their table spoke up. Vivian glanced over, but she couldn’t see him from her vantage point. There were too many others moving about, she hadn’t even noticed the little three-year-old’s approach. Giles didn’t look at him.

“Natalya.” He said, and Vivian frowned from the hollowness in his voice. A white-haired female who was sitting nearby holding a dark-haired baby glanced up as he spoke. A little white-haired toddler sat beside her. The female looked over and quickly stood.

“Come Logan... we go back to khouse.” She spoke in a thick Russian accent as she glanced back down at her own son. It was clear she was going to struggle with three young pups. Vivian watched her for a moment, it was early still and the baby in her arm was wide awake. He was peering around with interest.

“I’ll take him,” Vivian said gently. Natalya paused and looked to the Alpha. There was a brief silence and Vivian glanced to Giles, uncertain if she had overstepped. He didn’t look at her, but he gave a slight nod. Natalya moved over to her and gently handed the baby over.

Vivian took him carefully into her arms and studied his chubby little face. He looked up at her with his wide innocent eyes and Vivian felt her heart melt.

He was to be her son now...

Vivian gently stroked her thumb against his little palm, and he curled his fingers around it. So consumed in watching the new little life she was to be responsible for, she didn’t even notice Giles’ eyes on her.

She carefully glanced over at him, and he was watching her with a strange look. Vivian offered a slight smile, and he looked away. Vivian watched him for a moment before she looked back at Quinn’s happy little face. Vivian gently jiggled him a bit and he laughed. Vivian couldn’t help but smile and suddenly all her apprehension lessened.

She was a mother now...


“Shhh...” Vivian said gently as she rocked the slowly fading pup against her. His chubby little cheek was resting against her shoulder, and she could see his eyes gradually drooping. Vivian had plenty of practice with her sisters’ pups, and although Vivian knew it was strange since she hadn’t even made it official by consummating her matehood, she had already formed an irrevocable attachment to her new son.

Her wolf’s motherly instincts had awoken fully inside her. This baby was motherless... and she’d see to it that he would never be again.

Vivian heard his quiet approach long before he peaked in from the doorway. She glanced over at him. Logan was watching her with a look of uncertainty. Vivian offered a little smile.

“Hi...” She said quietly. Logan’s expression turned bitter, and he quickly disappeared down the hall. Vivian frowned. Other footsteps approached the room soon after.

“Don’t let bozer you. ’E’s at very confuseeng teeme reeght now.” Natalya spoke. Vivian studied her face for a moment. She was pretty, albeit a bit older. She looked to be in her late forties. Her son stood beside her. He couldn’t be more than two.

“I can only imagine...” Vivian said. She really couldn’t imagine what was going on in his little mind right now, especially with a strange new female in their home, and his mother gone. Natalya glanced down at her son.

“Aaron, pereyti k Logan” Natalya spoke in Russian. The boy turned and disappeared down the hallway. It was silent for a moment.

“I veel take zem een ze morneeng. No vorry. Just.. enjoy teeme vith new mate.” Natalya spoke from the doorway. Vivian glanced back at her, and felt the tightening in her stomach from her words. She’d left the ceremony early once Quinn had started to fuss and Giles had yet to return to the house. The nervousness she’d briefly lost had begun to return. Natalya seemed to notice. She smiled.

“Geeles ees good male. No be nervous.” Natalya reassured. Vivian said nothing.

“I veel put Logan to bed.” She added and turned to continue down the hallway. Vivian stood in silence for a moment, before she glanced down to the sleeping baby in her arms.

Carefully, Vivian laid him down in his crib and gently tucked him in. He rolled over and balled the blanket in his little fist. Vivian watched him for a while... unable to look away until she heard the sound of the front door open and close.

Vivian glanced up, the echo of the clang seemed to go on forever in the empty halls of the main wing of the massive mansion she now called home.

Vivian looked to the door and felt her chest tighten, but she heard no movement toward the stairs. It was silent for a moment before his footsteps finally sounded again.

But they weren’t headed for the stairs.

He moved away toward another area of the house. Vivian frowned and slowly walked out into the hall. She stood quietly for a moment as she listened to the sound of his movements until she heard the echoing of another door slam. Vivian looked to the master bedroom, a bedroom they were supposed to share now, and sighed.

She felt the weight of rejection.

She could hear Natalya speaking to the boys in a bedroom down the hall, and some of the residents in the west wing begin to trickle home as the party began to break up.

She slowly made her way to her new bedroom, and pushed the door open.

Her belongings had already been unpacked for her, she caught her own scent in the room in the dresser and closet. Vivian moved fully into the room and closed the door behind her.

Vivian simply stood there for a moment as she observed her new surroundings. The room was huge. It was fit for an Alpha in every sense of the word, but it also somehow managed to remain cozy with the furnishings and decor. They were simple, but homey.

Vivian glanced to the large bed, and felt the nervousness increase all the more. A large mirror was set in the opposite corner of the room, and she caught the reflection of herself, still done up in her ceremonial dress. Vivian immediately reached up and started pulling out the flowers from her hair, getting a strange burst of anger at the way she looked. It hadn’t mattered, just as she knew it wouldn’t.

He didn’t want her...

Vivian spent some time in their large bathroom after washing her face and readying herself for bed, staring at herself in the mirror. Finally, she turned and gathered up her discarded dress to dump it in the hamper on the way to the dresser to pull out some simple nightclothes. Once she dressed, she pulled the sheets and blankets back on the large bed, and crawled into it by herself.

She knew she’d be spending the night alone.


“You do know how this works, don’t you?” Olivia spoke sarcastically from her spot sitting on the large plush sofa in the sitting room. Vivian glanced over at her sister from her place rocking her sleeping baby in her arms. So far, Olivia’s visit had been nothing but unpleasant, and Vivian knew it was their mother who had sent her.

Vivian had never been close with Olivia, their age difference was just too vast. Olivia was twenty-three years old when Vivian was born. Olivia was their mother’s oldest child. Vivian glanced over to the front entrance hall where one of Olivia’s grown children loitered in a way that was making Vivian uncomfortable.

Gregor was Olivia’s eldest, he was three years older than Vivian, so it was hard for her to consider him a nephew, but then again, she hardly considered Olivia a sister.

“Yes...” Vivian finally answered, looking down at Quinn’s sleeping face again.

“Mother will be furious when she finds out,” Olivia added. Vivian pursed her lips in annoyance.

“I don’t know what she wants me to do. He left the day after... and hasn’t been home since.” Vivian said gently.

Giles had spent the night in an empty room, and left for one of their eastern territories early the next morning. Vivian hadn’t felt like leaving the house for the entire week to follow, so other than their manor confidants, no one else knew they hadn’t mated.

Until now.

“Vivian... you cannot let this fall throu-” Olivia began in a harsh reprimand.

“I know.” Vivian gently interrupted her. She glanced down at Quinn and gently rubbed her hand along his little back.

“How has the older one taken to you?” Olivia asked. Vivian frowned at her tone.

“His name is Logan.. and it’s an adjustment for him. He doesn’t quite understand.” Vivian replied gently. Olivia looked to Quinn with an expression Vivian instantly didn’t like. She adjusted him in her arms protectively. Olivia paused, and it was clear she was listening for anyone that could be within earshot. At present, no one was.

“It’s unfortunate you have to raise that female’s young... when you have your own, you will feel true motherly love,” Olivia said disdainfully. Vivian couldn’t help but feel a bit of anger.

“They are mine now,” Vivian growled protectively. Olivia quirked a brow.

“Not until you’re mated,” Olivia said. A tense moment of silence followed before she finally stood.

“The Blood Moon is two days away... I suggest you use it to your advantage.” Olivia said. Vivian gently rocked Quinn and avoided eye contact with her.

“It’s nice to see you well. I’m sorry I missed your union ceremony.” Olivia said, but her tone wasn’t entirely genuine. Vivian didn’t reply, and Olivia took her leave with her son.

Vivian sat in silence for a while...

“Vivian?” Cyra gently spoke from the doorway. Vivian glanced over at her.

“Dinner will be ready soon... and the Alpha called. He said he will be home in the morning.” Cyra said. Vivian watched her for a moment as she felt the slight tightening of her stomach from the news.

“Thank you...” Vivian replied softly. Cyra nodded and took her leave. Vivian glanced down at Quinn, and took a slow breath, unable to help the welling nervousness...


The next two days came and went and despite what he said, Giles did not return. Vivian awoke early to an empty bed on the morning of the autumnal Blood Moon.

Already she felt the extreme agitation of her heat. This would be her third and she hadn’t thought she’d have to go through it with no relief again.

All day, Vivian felt the horribly building ache, the deep desire to be mated and despite his rejection, she couldn’t help but want him so badly to come home.

It was late evening as she stood at the window of their bedroom and stared out at the moon’s reflection on the lake. Her eyes were glazed, her breathing was deep. She could feel the wolf stirring inside her and hear her blood rushing in her ears. She felt the pounding of her heart in her chest.

Natalya had taken the pups that morning to stay in a central packhouse to give them some time alone. Natalya seemed certain he’d return, and Vivian had hope that he would, but now, as the sunset, she doubted he was coming.

Vivian moved to the bed and collapsed upon it in complete misery. She felt the hot stream of tears trail down her cheeks as she struggled out of her clothes.

She was so hot.

She felt like she was burning, and the ache between her thighs was on the cusp of driving her mad.

At that moment... she hated Giles.

Vivian trailed her hand between her thighs. Even knowing how much worse that would make it, she didn’t care. Her thighs were soaked with want.

Vivian stroked herself desperately but got no relief from it. Her chest heaved with frustrated breaths, and for a moment, she was consumed with heart-wrenching sobs.

She was losing her mind. Why didn’t he want her?

The feel of another’s hand on her made her jump, her eyes snapped open, and through the blur of her tears, she saw his light blue eyes over her. So consumed in her self-pity, she hadn’t even heard his approach.

“I’m sor-” Giles began to speak, but Vivian cut him off with her mouth eagerly against his.

Vivian clutched him desperately as she arched her soft bare form against the length of his hardened body and was delighted to feel his skin against hers with nothing hindering them.

Giles growled and immediately wrapped an arm around her back to draw her fully against him. He met her kiss with even passion. Vivian eagerly spread her thighs and pushed her hips up against him in an urgent upward sway against his body and was rewarded by the feel of his already hardened arousal between her soaked thighs.

She was desperate for any friction at her aching core.

The pleasurable jolt she received was immense. Vivian broke the kiss and panted with desperation as she gazed up into his eyes. She could see the glaze of his wolf shining through them.

“Please,” Vivian begged with a strained voice. She drew her soft thighs higher on his hips to spread herself fully for him and relaxed back completely on the bed. She watched him intently as she slid her arms up above her head and tilted her head back to expose her throat in total submission to her Alpha.

Giles suddenly growled with approval and she felt his lips brush slowly over her neck. He trailed gentle kisses and licks down to the curve of her shoulder and took his time gently nipping against her soft skin until he found that sensitive spot at the curve of her neck.

With a growl, he bit down hard.

Vivian’s hips jerked as every submissive nerve in her body lit with intense pleasure. She whimpered with need as felt his hands tightly grip her hips. His mouth had not left her neck as he shifted his weight forward and she felt his hardness pressed between her thighs. With one hard motion, he slammed his hips forward.

Vivian arched against him and gasped at the feel of his sudden intrusion. She grit her teeth through the intense sensation of being filled so completely. Her inner walls stretched to a painful level around his thick girth. She was filled to the brim.

The discomfort of her virginity was barely an afterthought as the feel of him inside her soothed the raging fire of her heat.

It was instantly gratifying and overwhelming all at once.

Vivian emitted a soft whimper as she urgently swayed her hips against his. She wanted to feel him move. She needed him to mate her and claim her as his. He instantly obliged her. His hands moved up to grip her wrists and keep her firmly pinned as he began to thrust his hips so forcefully it rocked her entire body.

Vivian could barely breathe through the intensity of the pleasure as he upped his pace slowly until he was wildly thrusting inside her.

Vivian glanced up at him with glazed eyes, the look on his face would have frightened her if she wasn’t so lost to passion.

He growled possessively and hammered his hips harder. He hit deeper into her depths than she ever thought possible. Vivian tossed her head back, her fingers desperately digging into his hands as she felt the pleasure build to an almost unbearable level.

Giles pushed her further into the bed and kept her firmly pinned beneath him as he pummeled her body without mercy or restraint. Vivian grit her teeth, her whole body tensed hard, until all at once, she felt the flood of that built-up pressure inside her pelvis release.

The blur of pleasure was all-consuming.

Vivian gasped through the haze of bliss. She felt the warmth of his damp skin against hers. He was holding her tightly as he ground firmly between her thighs with a growl of pleasure. Vivian curled her arms beneath his shoulders as she felt his seed flood deep inside her tight wet heat.

Binding them together in matehood.

Vivian nuzzled affectionately against his shoulder as the emotion of the moment nearly overwhelmed her. Tears unwittingly streamed down her cheeks as she attempted to catch her breath. He held himself up by a forearm to keep from crushing her completely beneath his weight as he caught his breath.

Vivian could still feel him between her thighs, just as hard as ever, and it began to stir her need again. Giles glanced down at her, but Vivian could barely focus through the glaze of lust that had overtaken her eyes.

Vivian emitted a soft noise of surprise and pleasure as he flipped her over and remounted her hard from behind. Vivian fisted the sheets and eagerly shoved her hips back against him as she lay her cheek down against the bed as he started to thrust, even more brutal than before. Vivian closed her eyes, lost to the desire of her heat.

The night didn’t last long enough.


Vivian slowly awoke to the midday sun slanting across her eyes. She squinted for a moment, the haze of sleep still heavy on her mind as she rolled over to burrow herself further in the ultra comfortable bed and closed her eyes again. It had never felt so soft before... so warm.

Her whole body was tired, she was exhausted, and for a moment, she didn’t remember why... until her head cleared enough to feel the strong pull of her mating bond. Vivian smiled sleepily to herself at that.

The sudden prickle of eyes on her completely pulled her out of the haze. Vivian opened her eyes to an empty bed and frowned in confusion. The sheets and blankets had tangled between her legs and body. Vivian attempted to free herself.. and it was then that she noticed the small little heartbeat fluttering by the doorway.

Vivian glanced up. Logan was standing there, looking at her strangely.

“Where’s daddy?” He asked in his small three-year-old voice. Vivian glanced around the room with a frown.

“Logan!” Natalya scolded from the stairs. Logan turned and hurried back down the hall.

Vivian sat there for a moment and let the realization of it fully crash down on her. That crushing feeling was immediately suffocating.

Giles left.

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