To Hate Love

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Chapter 25


“To be ignorant of the past is to be forever a child”


“Maeve?” Romans voice yells from down the stairs and I close my book, placing it onto the ledge of the window seat I’d been lazing in all morning.

“I’m up here,” I yell back and listen as his footsteps begin to thud through the house. I had finished the compiled work I needed to have finished and sent to the Alpha King by this Sunday already, and all other matters regarding the human drafts bing implemented in the New Moon Packs were currently being settled by Roman and set to start in full effect by the end of the week also. It was weird to have the time space to be able to relax for a morning but I think I needed it.

Everything is coming onto effect now, reforms that will set people up to be alright- hell, even better than before. It’s just strange to think that mere months ago I was resigned to the fact that my life was going to continue on its route of shit. I felt angered but the urge to create change was never large enough for me to act on it, just like the world before. I saw the way the world operated, new of the injustices and the horrors that millions faced and I had a pretty good idea about who did it and yet I did nothing. Shrugged the responsibility off with nothing more than an empathetic feeling left.

Okay, the power that I could have possibly reached then versus what I have now and the circumstances in which I got them differ vastly. But still, I wonder if instead of deciding that I didn’t have the strength in me, I actually went out and tried with everything I had to get it. I wonder then if the world would’ve been different, better, in some way.

“Maeve?” I hear again, more him asking for permission to turn the corner than wondering where I am. He could’ve found me without me responding back in the first place in he really wanted to.

“Yeah?” I respond and he walks around the corner holding a rectangle wrapped in brown parchment paper.

“What’s that?” I ask, swinging my legs over the edge so Roman can sit down next to me.

He plonks down and hands it over dubiously. “Its from the Alpha King, it was addressed to you but I have no idea what it is. Do you?” He asks, somewhat skeptical over the entire ordeal.

I furrow my brows and look at it with a confused expression. “No,” I reply, turning over a small piece of paper attached that has my name scrawled in perfect cursive.

“Are you gonna open it?” Roman asks, curiosity lacing his tone and I turn to see his icy blue eyes trained on the object with a mixture of emotions.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” I comment with a raised brow and his gaze snaps away from the gift.

“Sorry, I don’t mean to pry. I’m just interested is all, the King sending my mate a personal item was something I didn’t expect,” he says and I shrug, not honestly too bothered if he is here. I highly doubt the king would do anything that’s push Roman and I apart.

“That makes two of us,” I reply, peeling back the parchment to find the hard, leather cover of what appears to be a book. A seriously ancient looking book.

I furrow my brows and lift it out. The Alpha King decided to give me reading material? I look over to Roman, expecting confusion, rage perhaps that his mate is being showered by another male but instead a sort of shock overtakes his features.

“Goddess,” he mummers, taking the book into his hands, running his slender fingers over the marking imprinting the centre of the cover. I look back to the parchment and notice a small white piece of paper that I take into my hands and turn over.

Dear Luna Maeve,

I hope you enjoy this book. Especially entry thirty seven under the crescent chapter.


King Tiberius

“What is it?” I ask, giving my attention back to Roman who still hold the book like its a bible.

“Its an early rendition of the tellings of the were-council. It’s basically a history book, a compilation of diary entries, first hand accounts I guess about some of the elder rulers. I’ve been trying to find one of these for years now,” he says, a smile tugging on the corner of his mouth and adoration sparkling in those blue eyes.

“Why?” I ask and he shrugs.

“I guess I’m just a history nerd,” he chuckles, “This is a very difficult thing to attain, Maeve. Most history taught to wolves now is more contemporary, I’m just a sucker for the ancient tales,” he says sheepishly and I take the book from his hands.

“Why would he give you this?” He asks, his curiosity not yet suspicious. He never asked what went on in the meeting between the Alpha King and I, even though I mentioned us discussing human matters. I managed to leave out how heated the discussion became.

“I think he wants me to brush up on my history,” I comment and he laughs.

“Well when you’ve finished using it I’d love to have a read myself, if that’s okay with you,” he says and I nod.

“Yeah, sure. What is on the itinerary today anyway? I know I’ve been absent this morning but I can come into the office for the rest of the day if you want,” I suggest and he shakes his head.

“Theres no need, I’ve just got to finish up on some financing and then I’m actually off to oversee the training of a new regiment of soldiers and unless you’d like to join, the afternoon is yours. Most of the plans for the reforms are in their finishing stages of development but I’m guessing that by tomorrow or the day after at least they will be ready for us to review,” he informs and I nod, letting out a huff. It has been a seriously busy week, in between intensive amounts of work and Romans training I have run myself out. I am getting stronger though, slowly but surely and I know more methods of technical fighting that I didn’t before.

“Well, if the King wants me to read this it must be important,” I say and he nods.

“I’m not sure how much of it is transcribed from the ancient language though,” he laughs, looking down at the book. “I think he was counting on you having completed more than one lesson with Madam Regina,”

“The ancient language?” I ask and he nods.

“Most Alphas are requited to learn it at birth and those above the Alpha status generally know it as a first language. I can translate the things you can’t read if you want,” he says and I look at him with more curiosity. He speaks an entirely different language, on not known to the general world? I don’t know why I never even considered that to be a possibility.

“So all the Alpha Superiors know this language?” I ask and he nods.

“Yes, in fact most meetings we hold are spoken in the mother tongue but considering you were there I asked that we converse in English,” he says and I guess it makes sense.

“I should probably learn it then,” I mumble and he laughs again.

“When you have the time to you can, there isn’t a pressing need to add another things onto your plate,” he replies and I cannot help but agree with that too. Learning an archaic language will only further muddle my mess of a mind.

Roman stands up from the seat and smiles, “Well, I better get going. Don’t worry about training tonight, its recovery day,” he jokes before his eyes widen slightly with an idea. “Though as a training exercise you can make dinner maybe,” he looks at me with hope, silently begging me to make him food.

“Maybe,” I mumble and he smiles.

“I don’t mind making brownies if you want to make a trade,” he adds and I smile sheepishly at this. “I better get going, I hope you conducer my offer,” he says and I give him a small smile before he disappears around the wall and wanders off.

My eyes flick down to the book sent by the Alpha King and my fingers itch to open up the pages, that burning sensation of curiosity steering my body as if in pilot mode. It could be absolute hoggle-wash, maybe the crescent chapter is just a blank page and its some kind of joke. But the urge to know either way is still strong.

I lift my feet back up onto the couch and lean into the cushion supporting my back, resting the book on the knees as I carefully turn over the pages. I feel as though the paper will crumble beneath my touch, disintegrate into dust before my very eyes.

The first page of the book holds a small transcription and I wish Roman were here to be able to read it to me, it looks like it is for someone but the markings are foreign to my eyes. The page after holds similar markings but from the black moons at the side of the language I can tell that it is a chapter index. I skim until I find the crescent moon and the strange markings that are scrawled next to it, thanking whatever god or goddess presides over us when numbers I can read are lined next to it.

Page 172. I flick through the book until I reach the chapter and from there continue until entry thrity seven meets my gaze. The entirety of the crescent chapter appears to be different entries in different languages, all recounting something, I suppose.

Sir Henry Rantyus

1240 AD

I write this passage with great sorrow and remorse, for we have truly failed. It was never supposed to end this way, at least not to my understanding, but what a fool I have been. I write this in knowledge that it could, along with myself, be destroyed if found in the wrong hands but I feel it my duty nonetheless. After everything I’ve done, perhaps sharing the truth will allow the lord to forgive me of my sins.

It has been two centuries since the creatures of the night revealed themselves to us, the shifters and witches as we know them, appeared in the kings hall one night, sheathed behind his mortal skin and confessed of his hidden nature. Demons, animals, monsters. I was not yet born but the legends of how fear rippled through the faith of many still wash over us in tremors to this day.

The man who had shifted right before the court would later be known as a King of his own kind, the leader to other shifters that secluded themselves in hidden villages, concealed by witches and hidden from humans. King Adger of the shifters. He there made the proposal of a peaceful society, in which neither humans nor the creatures of the night lived in fear of retribution, promising that no harm would befall the Kings people under his rule. The courts and kingdoms across the land signed a treaty and forged an alliance, one that ensured creatures across the lands would be safe under the joint protection of the three species. But the differences between the species didn’t last, it couldn’t have from the very start. When I was but a small child I remember those who walked differently among us, I remember the way my mother would clutch onto me tighter and the townspeople would close their shutters at the sign of foreigners. I remember the fear. That deep rooted fear that crippled so many. Humans were weak in comparison, when it came to a fight those with shifter blood never needed to yield, they stood firm and powerful against any enemy who tried to harm the triad alliance that was forged. They protected us.

But that dependency soon became a problem. Even now, as I recount these events my head hangs low in shame, as my mind moves to the creatures that treated us with nothing but kindness and compassion and then to what we did…

The human King knew he needed to act, I, among other members of his court urged him to do so. For the sake of humanity we needed to know that if the creatures one day decided to turn on us we would be safe. But we couldn’t, there was no way to fully ensure that we would stand against them unless they were truly gone. All of them.

The courts came to the agreement that nothing pure would come from this unforeseen distress and so we turned, as a collective to the dark witches, the clan moved by intentions that were always fogged and mysterious. Whilst King Adger and his Queen, Mariad, were residing over their own court, unfying the leaders under their ‘pack’ as they called it, the kings of the land consulted the dark witches and devised a plan. The witches, then shunned by the others of their kind wanted nothing in return save for the power of the high witch and the recognition as the one true clan.

They devised a plan, to use a group of elite knights and transform them through dark magic to rival the powers of the creatures of the night. I remember the first transformation as vividly as anything, how the man who would become a leader to the knights walked in the room, his body a weapon even without the immense power he would soon yield. Sir Arthur Hunt, a lower member of the courts yet a fierce warrior and calculating leader, he was a kind man, one of honour and dignity but after the day of his change he became… something else .He led the battle against the creatures in secret, right under the nose of the shifter King.

Their quest began with understanding the enemy. Shifters had been clever enough to keep their weaknesses hidden from the world but that only drove the determination of the Sir Arthur further. They began to capture the weaker among the shifters, women and children who were on out at night. No coppers or potions effected the creatures but it was soon discovered that silver ended their lives much like it would a human. We continued to fund these experiments, urge the new discoveries no matter how many shifters had to die for it. It was a means to an end. It was discovered that there were certain herbs that disoriented the wolves, wolfsbane being the most harmful of them all.

At first I saw no harm in the methods for better it be them now than all of humanity but things began to change. The shifters were being taken for the pleasure of the knights, who enjoyed nothing more than relishing in the screams and deaths of the creatures. The knights almost fed off it, energised themselves and grew addicted to the kill.

The fellowship not only discovered their methods of weaponry against the wolves, but it soon became clear that for every female killed, a male would soon die too. ‘Soulmates’ is the term they used, the shifters were connected to others through their very souls and killing one would break that bond, the bond that bound them together and to life itself.

We thought at the time that it was a miracle, a god send to give us the ability to kill two birds with one stone. But it is easy to think something is right when you are stuck in a castle surrounded by power hungry lords and Kings.

King Adger of the shifters came to the court various times, claiming that his people were being killed and he had no idea as to why. His blind faith in the humans and the treaty they forged was a flaw that only a man with true honour could possess. Perhaps that is when I started to second guess myself, to think that maybe what we were doing was wrong. For the fear that I felt was only ever built from conclusions I drew in my own mind.

When we turned up with false confusion and fake sympathy the King turned to the witches closest to his pack. They cast spell upon spell, built barriers of magic to ward off intruders, even delved in sacrificial rituals to search for some kind of answer. But what they didn’t know was that Sir Arthur was a clever man, he had-for all that time-been preparing. He knew that once a certain amount of soulmates were taken there would be retaliation sooner or later and so he sought help from the very dark witches who transformed he and his men, the ones who had given them the gift of their newfound strength. This coven of witches did not follow the moon goddess or any of her disciples, they followed only darkness and chaos and sourced their powers from dark magic that would see the world crumble before peace reigned.

Sir Arthur struck a deal with the witches, something that I found out too late. He would bring them unwilling victims to sacrifice in return for more power, a way to make him more than just the leader of the knights. To make him as strong as a shifter King, stronger. After countless sacrifices and rituals, when the foundation of the treaty was finally beginning to be challenged as the shifters came to their senses, Sir Arthur began his transformation.

I don’t know fully how and I’m not sure I want to but whatever they did to him worked. He became as strong as the shifters King, with a power that was nearly uncontrollable. But like all things where nature is concerned, a balance is to be upheld. Sir Arthur may have possessed a power to rival a King but he was also given a soulmate. At first, this seemed like a blessing, but the witches-in their darkness-promised him that he wouldn’t find the half his soul he’d sacrificed for many years to come. Sir Arthur didn’t care, he told me so much himself, good riddance that he wouldn’t be brought down by a woman, he didn’t need one.

Sir Arthur Hunts curse, however, created a hate that applied to all creatures of the night, witches themselves included in that. The second that the power they gifted him coursed through his veins he slaughtered the entirety of the dark witch coven. A mountain full of witches killed by one man in a matter of hours. I didn’t know of that then, but others did, the Kings who ruled the lands applauded him and shared a toast in their secret meetings. A saviour, they called him.

The Kings and Sir Arthur devised a plan, one that I knew of and did nothing to stop. The Kings gathered at a gala and invited King Adger to attend, luring him in with promises of news on the shifter killings. At that gala, whilst lords and ladies from courts all over the lands dined and wined the King was tricked into entering a room said to hold one of the men responsible from the attacks. Blinded by rage, King Adger entered the room only to be trapped in, sealed by silver walls and left to face Sir Arthur Hunt.

The party that night roared into the dawn, and as the shifter King’s body was burned to a crisp, the knights ravaged each and every pack they set eyes upon, covens and homesteads of any creature of the night was ripped to shreds. It was victorious. But what Sir Arthur didn’t know was that whilst he was killing King Adger, Queen Mariad gave birth to a baby boy. The barriers put up by the witches before they became entirely extinct saved the young boy and gave him them the time to transport him to a faraway land, one looked over by the goddess and home to the elder wolves.

I don’t know for certain how many died but those who remain now live in fear, hidden from the world like before and forever chained to a life of persecution. Sir Arthur Hunt called the knights under his own leadership, away from that of the Kings but still in a close alliance with them. They call themselves the Hunters, named after their leader and cursed to continue their reign through the children they bear.

I know I have failed many, I saw it in the humans butchering shifters in the streets, women, children. A massacre that will never end and a people who won’t forget it. There are too many who can not be trusted in this world and I am afraid that my dear old friend Arthur is one of them. He is not the young, brave lord anymore, not after the power they put in him. And he is not to be trusted.

There are already whispers of a young shifter King, assassinating those who killed his parents all those years ago and I don’t want to be here to face his wrath. He is coming for me, I know this and I hope that god will forgive me for what I am about to do, for all that I have already done.

I cannot carry on living with this burden and I pray that one day, humanity will prevail and we might live together in harmony once more.


Found and archived by King Tiberius 1241 AD


I walked through the perfectly trimmed gardens, emptying my stomach into the soil under a rose bush and brushing off the soldier who concerned over my sick state. It was horrible. So, so horrible. I read past the entry of Sir Henry, into detailing found from Hunters themselves, graphic descriptions of how they had brutally murdered wolves and how they relished in it too.

I wouldn’t have found it so gruesome had I not realised that the entries didn’t just end centuries ago. Wolves were living in fear of death-brutal death- until they finally took over humanity. Roman’s sister being a great indication of just how long the killings orchestrated by hunters and humans alike continued. How could I possibly expect them to treat us with respect and equality when all they had faced from our kind was horror and crime? It takes a lot to admit when you were wrong, I wasn’t wrong, I just wasn’t aware. Because all the times I had blamed every wolf in existence, all the times I though to myself that they should pay for what they’d done I was being just as bad.

They retaliated against the hardships they faced with oppression not only out of revenge but fear that history would repeat itself. Punishing them, making every wolf man, woman and child burn for the injustices humans have faced in these last few years will just continue on the cycle of hate. Clearly, retaliating from hate with hate doesn’t work. The blame of whose fault this entire thing is stems back to 1241 for Christs sake. At what point are we going to just stop doing this to one another?

I don’t think that the Alpha King should have treated humans as he did when he took over, I will probably never change my mind on that fact, but hating him isn’t going to help anyone. I don’t know what I would have done in his position having gone through what he had and its a perspective that I need to consider. There are some humans who would’ve fought for the wolves if their reveal didn’t go the way they planned and there are some wolves who want to protect humans even now. That gives me hope.

And then there’s hunters… Ollie. My Ollie. Just like there are good among those who are seen as evil I know that there is good among the hunters. Oliver left them for me, he lived a life under the rule of the creatures he was cursed to kill and prevented himself from lashing out once in order to keep me safe. He never hurt a wolf, not while we lived in the sectors and I know in my heart that he wouldn’t kill someone unless he absolutely had to. I just know.

“Luna, it is getting dark. Would you like to return inside or have one of us fetch you a coat?” A soldier asks from behind me, a human one, I note. Romans reforms truly have started over here if he is going to entrust my life into the hands of both species.

“No, it’s alright, just let me be for a little while longer,” I mummer back, sitting down on the grass and hugging my knees to my chest to quell the shiver.

I stare out at the garden in front of me, the vines and leaves that give off a vibrancy only a living thing could achieve. That guard was right, it is getting dark. And cold. The night breeze drifting up from the cool ocean sends goosebumps sprouting over my arms.

“Goddess, Maeve,” I whip my head around to Roman who looks at me with pure concern and reaches to touch my arm, sparks ingesting under his touch. “You’re freezing,” he points out and I don’t have the energy to respond, instead turning my attention back to the gardens.

I notice the guards leave, their purpose here no longer necessary just as a large jacket is placed over my shoulders. I pull the warm fabric over my shoulders and look to Roman as he sits down clad in only a shirt next to me.

“What’s wrong, Maeve? Is it something that was in that book? Did the King hurt you?” He asks, his tone becoming more and more serious as the prospect o someone hurting me enters his mind.

“No, I’m fine. Just thinking, I guess,” I reply and he nods, his lips pursed into a thin line and his eyes doing that thing they do when he is calculating something. “What is it?” I ask and his blue eyes snap back to mine.

He lets out a soft sigh and places his warm hand over mine, comfort filling my body though the bond. “There has been some troubling news. I don’t want to distress you but you deserve to know.”

Dread fills my body. “What happened?” I ask, my tone edged with a concern that makes him flinch.

“Its Alpha Akeno. He was murdered during his visit to South America.”

authors note

Dun dun dunnnnnnnnn.

In light of reaching 200k on tlh, I will be doing a fun lil Q & A for y’all, either here or on insta, or both (lemme know what you want) and answering some questions you might have. {DISCLAIMER: only the non spoilers lol.

So maybe comment on this sentence any questions you have and I’ll post a questionnaire on my into story too!!

Thanks for all the support and going on this journey with me,


Ps: guys stop killing each other in the comments lmao, but that being said, DISCUSS STUFF, like open discussions and meeting in the middle or just gaining perspective is super important as long as its done in a progressive way ya know?

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