~ 6 ~
“I feel like we have not talked in ages.” It felt good to sit with Clay in the front porch with no one in the house. Ever since we joined the Open Wound pack we did not have any alone time. It made me feel weird and uncomfortable; Clay is one of the most important constants in my life, and I felt like the entire Owen situation had kept us away from each other. Nevertheless, our bond was still as strong as it had always been.
How do you feel?
“What do you mean?” He was sitting on the floor with his back leaning on the front door. I had my head laid on his lap as I enjoyed the quiet moment we were having.
I mean you went through a portal to an unknown and mysterious dimension not once but twice. So, how do you feel?
“I am trying not to feel anything. I mean the one time I allowed my anxiety to get the best of me, Accalia had to take control and Alec and I got stuck in that place for an entire day.”
Wait, but your anxiety has not gotten that bad in almost a year. I do not even remember the last time Accalia had to take control because of your anxiety.
“That is exactly my point Clay. I do not want to be the reason of the pack’s chances of survival getting ruined when things become critical.”
You cannot repress your emotions Shadow; I thought you learned that from what happened with Diamanda.
“But that is just another reason Clay! I mean did you really think that I just managed to get over being forced to see her die for a second time? I had to repress these emotions in order to focus and be able to help with Owen’s betrayal.”
That is not a solution sister. Just like the first time, your emotions will eventually find a way to resurface.
“I know that Clay, and I can assure you they manage to almost resurface almost every day. I just hope they do not overwhelm me in a time when someone’s life depends on me.”
I honestly do not know what to tell you. Ever since the alpha asked me to keep an eye on Owen, I have been consumed by rage. I almost kissed Nolan when he offered to take my place at the bastard’s side for the day. I was so close to murder him.
“How do you stay focused when your emotions are so potent and intense?”
I remind myself of why I am doing what I am doing, I remind myself of my goal. I let that goal guide me and calm my emotions down. It is not easy, but it is better than allowing my negative feelings from corrupting my mind.
“Can we go for a run?” I pulled my head off of his lap and faced his hazel eyes. My best friend gave me a raised eyebrow.
Of course, I can use some release. We got off the front porch, took our clothes off, turned into our wolves, and we started running.
Where do you want to go? Clay asked me as we ran side by side away from the house.
I do not now, how about we run without any direction until we cannot run anymore?
That works for me. Clay agreed as he gave me a wolfish grin and increased his speed. Within a few seconds I saw his tail as it moved in every direction due to Clay’s speed and the wind.
Do not make me run ahead of you. Clay teased me. Thus, I ran as fast as I could and I passed Clay’s wolf. Trees became blurry and I let Accalia take control since she too needed the run as well.
Do not make me run ahead of you Clay. She threw his words back at him.
I do not plan to Lia. Zen, Clay’s wolf answered her as he matched her pace.
We ran for hours until the sun disappeared and got replaced by the moon. We missed lunch and dinner. Despite the fact that I practically passed out on the front door, that run mentally prepared me for what was to come.