For hours on end I gazed out at the colossal dunes which covered this barren waste land. However, alluring the sight was, the words still bothered me, as if they had burrowed their seed into my soul, and was now awaiting to blossom into fear and dread. The words had brought back an old question. A question whose answer I longed for, since my birth.
I heard the creak of the door open, as the professor stepped out onto the porch.
“The weather is still odd?” The professor smugly inquired, as he stared forward at the grey and gloomy sky.
“Those words, which Samuel uttered…”
“Do not even begin with it, young Augustine.” The professor exhaled as he sat down on an old wooden rocking chair.
“But, why was he chanting those words, especially toward me?” I began to raise my voice in frustration.
“Imagine being in this dreaded land for seasons on end, and in parallel being detached from your very soul. It takes a toll on a man.”
“He nearly suffocated me! He sensed my presence and grabbed me! I believe I deserve some form of answers.”
“I told you to stay clear of him, and you didn’t. Now you suffer the consequences.”
The professor started to put tobacco into a scarlet wooden pipe.
“But, why me?” I hesitated to ask the question for fear of being belittled.
“He senses things on a higher level than others. He’s an enlightened one.” The professor answered.
“I understand that, but those words…”
“Oh, God please help me! Listen here, young Augustine.” The professor interrupted me. “There are restrictions put in place, for good and valid reasons. You are too young and foolish to understand them!” I was quite awe struck by this, but still I persisted.
“Who am I, professor?” I asked hesitantly.
The professor did not reply, instead he kept on stuffing his pipe with tobacco, ignoring my inquiry.
“So, you are just going to ignore my question? No wise words of ‘waiting for the right time?’”
“Hmm, no. I guess not.” The professor smugly replied, as he finally lit his pipe.
“You smoke?” I inquired.
“Currently, yes, now, will you be as so kind as to piss off. Since, by the looks of it. I might perish quicker as a result of your constant intrusiveness, than by the hands of a bloody entity!”
I was quite baffled by his actions, but more baffled by his abrupt malignity.
While it was true, the professor was more often than not malignant; still he seemed more intent on insulting and degrading me than usual.
“Oh, I see, so, you still won’t reveal to me my identity, which I am privileged to know?” I wittingly inquired of the professor.
“You aren’t privileged to anything.” The professor retaliated as he puffed out a cloud of smoke.
“The only thing I ask is my identity. I only want to know what I am. You can forget any other inquiries I had or have currently, because if we die here, in this dreaded land, I at least want to die, knowing what I was.“ The professor kept silent and didn’t utter a word. I waited for a moment, contemplating if I should say more. Finally, in utter frustration, I spoke. “To hell with you!”
“Excuse me!?” the professor turned to me in bewilderment.
“Why won’t you just tell me? It is knowledge that I am entitled to!” I raised my voice with anger.
“I determine what you are entitled to and what you are not entitled to! Now, I again repeat myself. Piss off.” This only served to fuel the fire of my anger which had built up inside of me, for I did not understand the professor’s approach.
“I am done!” I indignantly exclaimed. ”I shall no longer live in a whirlpool of enigma for the sake of your corrupt morals! Long I had lived in pain, not knowing why my mother had cried in the anguishes of insanity, or why no one had ever come to my aid as I screamed in trepidation! I was alone for so long, until you came along, until I wandered off into the Athenaeum of Myriad, only for you to throw me out and make me beg for you to let me in! You have degraded me into your fancy rat! I wanted to be acknowledged. I longed more for attention, than for your stupid knowledge and wisdom, but you couldn’t even give me a drop of that could you?”
I felt a light feeling in my feet and pressure on my chest, whilst horrid pain vailed in my head.
“Things aren’t as simple as you put them out to be, young Augustine!“ The professor countered. His face seemed to have a hint of sorrow, which quickly dissipated, as I continued.
“Oh, is that so!?” I loudly exclaimed
“Yes, so! The sun doesn’t revolve around you! Nor did it ever revolve around you! There are billions of people on earth, and even more in other realms! There is much that you do not know, or that you will ever know! If I hadn’t given you the kindness I had, you would have been locked away, in blazing chains! You are an anomaly!”
The professor proceeded to lower his tone.
“Those people, in there, in that house. They hunt entities alike you trap them and chain them, even kill them at best! I spared you, took you in, taught you many great things. I was rough, but rough for a reason, to toughen you up. I did it to prepare you for the real world. Yes, I do admit that I was a bit to crude at times, but you cannot expect me to be a loving father to someone who could cause my execution at any moment!”
The professors’ words hit alike a train going at full throttle. My emotions had been akin to waves on a stormy night. They crashed, elevated, and deviated. It was truly an utter mess.
“You could at least have shown a nick of compassion! Perhaps shown some understanding of my predicament!”
“What about you! Could you have some understanding of the situation?“ The professor countered.
“How could I have an understanding of something which didn’t know even existed?”
“Oh, give me rest! You didn’t know you where anomalous? It was hinting at you alike a black wolf amongst the whitest of sheep!”
“I didn’t know you slaughtered people like me! Now, I beg you! Tell me what I am! Tell me how I can be repaired!” I pleaded with the professor.
I pleaded and begged, nearly to me knees. Praying for even the slightest of answers which he hid from me.
“I don’t know! I do not know what you are! I don’t even have the slightest clue as to what you could be, and even less of a clue, how to fix you! “
My ears began to ring, for the words pierced through my heart like a spear.
“What? “ I inquired my voice quavering.
“I tried, young Augustine! For many nights I studied the writings. I even ventured into the forbidden ones, just so I could know and understand what you were. I have tried to help you, Augustine.”
“Why didn’t you tell me!?”
“And then what! For you to somber all over my study. That’s the last thing I need right now.”
As he uttered those words, I collapsed. My heart sunk into the deepest of the earths. I could not bear the thought of living like this for the entirety of my life. My legs gave away, and I sat down against the porches wooden fence.
I felt as if someone had put the weight of seven seas upon my chest. My ears began to ring, and my mind had collapsed into oblivion. I began to hear sounds but could not distinctly discover what they were articulating; they were but a thick mist to my ears, and a void to my mind.
There seemed to be an emergency, for I had noticed Rahil and Amalia run out to the porch and gaze at the dunes. I had no concern whatever for their actions, until a dark shadow was cast over the disarrayed wooden porch.
Strong winds had caressed my skin, and my hair waved in the chilling breeze.
I had slowly moved my head to the right, in order to look behind me; to unravel what had cast such a dark shadow and perplexing winds. My anger, wrath, sadness and oblivion where suppressed in consequence to what I had seen. It was at that moment that the wrathful souls advanced closer than expected.
The dunes had repressed their presence and now they had risen above the dunes and were now charging with tremendous speed. Hundreds upon thousands of infuriated and forgotten souls were ready to tear us apart. I could faintly hear the shouts and commands of the crew. I could but faintly see, out of the corner of my eye, their futile attempts to halt the soul’s approach, all consequently in vain.
As my gaze was fixed on the forgotten souls, I slowly rose as green streaks of lightning struck the soaring house. I made my way down the old crooked steps until I arrived at the final step.
Glaring at all the angered souls, and their destined approach, the entirety of my wrath, anguish, misery and oblivion could not be suppressed any longer. At last it was all unleashed, leaving me feeling alien and chilled. A scarlet wave embellished by symbols I knew nothing of, came rushing out of me, decimating the souls and the landscape on which they had walked.
Sheer annihilation was unleashed, and the power which I hadn’t understood overwhelmed me. I felt unshackled, unhinged and untamed. It was as if I was no longer present in time and space.
My mind endured a sense of desolation and a feeling of catatonic vicinity engulfed me. My mind was in such disarray that I could no longer comprehend, nor could I describe in mere words how I felt. The only words which would suffice was that that I felt, free.