My room’s been dark the whole entire day as I haven’t moved out of my bed, not even to get any type of food or water. I stare off into the darkness wondering what has gotten into me. The only time I was ever like this was when I left Eddie. Even then, I don’t think it was this bad.
The door of my room opens up, letting in some light from the hallway but my dark curtains surrounding my bed filters it out. I shift out of my comfortable position in the bed and peek through my curtains. Two large green eyes framed with light eyelashes and an adorable smile look back at me.
Smirking, I pull back the curtains and reach out my hand to the little toddler waiting for permission to join me. Once his small hand is in mine, I grab him and pull him under the sheets with me. I let my baby brother snuggle in close to me as I create glittering stardust in the atmosphere contained by my black-out curtains to please the little giggling boy.
“Zurya, Mom said you sad. I wanna make you laugh like you do me.”
I smile at the intelligent boy cuddling close to me. The boy is a pure genius if you ask me. His vocabulary is outstanding for his age. I can’t help but be proud of how far he has come. The last child that was like that and even slightly normal was Azinaraa. I knew how to talk the earliest of ages but was too damn stubborn to show any one.
It’s always been that way when it came to academics. I never cared. Having the devil’s mark made me think I didn’t need anything or anyone else. And that’s how I ended up with Eddie. I was down and I thought that what he showed me was love. But I was wrong. So wrong. The only person that has shown me love was…. I don’t know.
There was someone before Aiden.
Someone who showed me love.
Someone who I should remember.
Yet I don’t.
I try to shake the grogginess from my head and pay my little brother the attention he wants.
“I’m fine James. Really.”
James giggles when I tickle his sides, his laughter causing something to blossom in my chest. Some type of longing to be cared for. Before I can even detect where it could be from, I hear my phone vibrate loudly on my nightstand. Frowning, I roll over and turn on my phone.
There’s a message from Alaric asking me to come over to his apartment. I quickly send him back a message asking if he has gotten back the results. It doesn’t take long for him to reply back with a long ‘yes’. For some strange reason Aiden hasn’t been around ever since Alaric came searching for a test sample.
“What are you doing?”
“Wanna come with me over to Alaric’s place?”
“You remember my friend with green skin and long yellow hair?”
My little brother shakes his head, not remembering the warlock. I shrug my shoulders and stand up to change out of my nightclothes. I grab a pair of sweatpants with red swirls sliding up one pant leg; a T-shirt with a red skull and bones on it; along with some checkers sneakers and a sweater though it’s around the hottest times of the year.
James follows me out of my bedroom and into his so I can find him some clothes. After a few minutes of searching, I grab a pair of sweats that I bought him a few days after I came back on my birthday. All of it has two white lines running down the length of both the grey sweater and pants. I ruffle his hair before shooting Mom a quick text telling her that I have James.
I warp the two of us into the apartment owned by Alaric the green warlock. The man sitting on the couch only a few inches away from where I stand looks up at me shocked. I smile at my old friend but it doesn’t feel as real as it normally is. Certain things just don’t feel the same way they did before. It’s like everything is forced out of me.
“Oh, you are here already. I thought I had more time. If you’ll just excuse me I need to clean some things up in the kitchen.”
Alaric jumps out of his seat and sprints into the kitchen, closing in the door. I set my little brother down on the floor so he can toddle about as I look through my messages sent to Aiden. They’re mostly me checking in on him. I sigh heavily and look down at James when I feel my sweatpants being tugged on.
“What’s up, babes?”
“Um, I don’t have any snacks on me. I’ll see if Alaric has anything you can eat.”
I walk over to the door leading into the kitchen and listen to the hushed voices coming from the other side. I try to tune them out, not feeling like intruding on Alaric’s business today. They cut off when I knock on the wood separating them from me.
“Alaric, do you have any soft snacks in there? Like apple sauce?”
The door swings open, revealing a red tinged warlock glaring at me. I raise an eyebrow and he plasters a smile on his face. His expression matches the majority of my past moods since I’ve come back on the grid.
“Do tell why you didn’t bother to eat anything before rushing to get here?”
“It’s not for me, dumbass. It’s for James.”
At the sound of the little blonde boy’s name Alaric’s face lights up. Green sparks slip by his fingers as he snaps and suddenly I’m holding a bowl of jello with gummy worms in it. The doors slams in my face as I hold up the ok sign. Fucker. Rolling my eyes I turn around and sit down on the floor next to my baby brother, eating the gummy worms while he eats the jello. As we sit there on the floor snacking and waiting for the warlock to join us again, I examine my nails while James plays with my hair.
“Alright, sorry about, Aszurya. Hello, little James. Did you enjoy your snack?”
I cringe at the sound of Alaric babying my little James. So I pick the little boy up and keep him in my lap before telling Alaric to get on with it.
“You got the results, no?”
“Yes. Unfortunately our beloved Aiden isn’t the person he told us.”
“Who is he?”
“Adrian Nagotory. ”
“But didn’t he die a few hundred years ago?”
“That’s what we were all led to believe. No one ever found a body and the soul was never retrieved by your ancestors. You can see the resemblance is uncanny either way.”
I stare at Alaric in disbelief. He’s absolutely right about the resemblance but I’m sure someone would have said something to me. Someone besides Alaric. My father has been eyeing the guy for a while and he’s the only one that could really recognize the similarities. I look over at Alaric once more and take in his worried expression, knowing there’s more.
“Is there something else that I need to know?”
“Do you remember what happened two years ago?”
I raise an eyebrow, thinking back a few years. When exactly does he want me to remember back to? A lot of things happened a few years ago.
“By two years back, do you mean my episode? Because I don’t think anyone is ever gonna let me forget that.”
“Yes but do you remember what caused it? Do you remember who triggered it?”
“Of course I do. It was…”
I trail off and frown as I rake my brain for the answer. I can’t seem to remember who it was. Now that I think about it, I don’t even remember why I lost control. Why did I try to end the pain? The pain… What was it caused by?
“I can’t remember what happened before. Everything is all blurred.”
Alaric nods his head but his demeanour doesn’t change at all. He just stands up and offers me his hand to help me up. I don’t take it. He’s acting too weird. His eyes are cautious as if my own are darkening.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“You told me before you miss someone who you can’t seem to remember. I believe I know who that someone is.”
Alaric puts his hand out to stop me from going anywhere before stepping backwards towards the kitchen where he so rudely slammed the door in my face after providing my brother with a snack. He opens the door slowly and says something inaudible to whoever is hiding in the apartment’s kitchen, so I decide to put James down.
Everything seems to slow down as I watch a tall mysterious man with a body lined with strong muscles walk out and stand by Alaric’s side. I look him up and down, trying to take in everything about him. Everything that makes my hearts jump and speed up. It’s like I’ve been running a marathon and just crossed the finish line with my adrenaline all pumped up.
I know this body from somewhere. This body is the one I’ve been missing. The same one that’s been taunting me in my dreams. His aura and energy… they just slip around me, embracing me. He surrounds me yet his body is so far away. I look at his face, taking in all of that beauty. His lips, so full, make me want to commit myself to the asylum. And those eyes…
One hazel, one green.
Just like the man in my dreams. Those gems are holding me captive, drowning me in a pool of sensuality. I bite down on my lip, hard, as his eyes rake my body, lighting me up like the Great Fire. I can just feel my soul slipping as he undresses me with those eyes of his.
But then something else stops me dead in my tracks. The vague memories come flying back. The sexy moments where he undressed me with calloused hands. The moment he retrieved the memories we searched everywhere for. The moment he walked into his father’s study and out of my life. Now, I remember what triggered me. It was this man in front of me. It was him who split my heart in two. He left me.
I frown and close my eyes as the pain comes back to me. It rips through my body like my own cells are trying to detonate themselves. There’s a reason I wanted to forget. The pain was too much. It was worse than Eddie because unlike him, this man right here cared for me. And I cared for him. But all of it went down the drain. Just like my psyche. Just like my life almost did. I almost gave it all up. But Alaric stopped me. Praise the first he came when he did.
Alaric walks towards me with caution as I take one backwards. I don’t know how I am supposed to feel. I’m angry because he left. But guilty because it was my fault. Yet, I’m joyous because he’s here within my reach. Sending sparks down my body with just his eyes alone.
My body jerks forward, reacting to my name running off of his lips. Running off his tongue, turning me to molten lava. But I stop myself. I have to stop myself otherwise these past two years, spending my time with Aiden, building back up my walls, would have gone to waste. I have to keep my distance.
“N-no…. You left me…”
“You don’t understand. I wasn’t supposed to stay so long.”
Within seconds, before I can do anything to stop it, I am in his arms, staring up into his mismatched eyes. We’re so close, it hurts. My breaths become shallow as our scents mix together creating something toxic. Our foreheads touch, the only thing separating us are our clothes.
“I swear I had every plan to come back to you but I wasn’t allowed to. It’s been so long since you’ve been in my arms.”
I slip my arms around his neck and feel the muscles in his back under my fingers, remembering the good moments. We stare into each other’s eyes, unmoving, just taking a break from the world. Unfortunately for us, Alaric decides to break us up telling King to remember everything else. I frown and step away from the two, picking up my little brother from off the floor. He looks over my shoulder and smiles at the men behind me.
“Wait, where are you going?”
“Home. You shouldn’t have done this, Alaric. You know what’ll happen if I get too close again.”
“Aszurya that won’t happen again, I swear to God it won’t.”
“Your God means nothing in this realm. If you’re gonna swear to anything, make it towards Azazel. Hell, swear it on your life’s magic,” I growl out at him, glaring over my shoulder. He watches me closely, lighting me up with that gaze.
“Fine. I swear on my life’s magic with you and Alaric as my witnesses, I won’t leave you broken the way I did before.”
I watch as he crosses his heart officially sealing the deal. Now he can’t leave me. I should be happy about this but I just have a bad feeling in my gut. Something tells me that we both will regret this day. Finding each other again.
“Stay for me, damn it. Come back to me.”
Words go unspoken by the man in front of me but I don’t move a muscle. I’m not sure why I can’t go back to him. Let him take me in his strong arms and caress me. It must be because of how close we were back then. Two years ago when I couldn’t do anything to stop my heart from breaking in two. I can’t let this happen to me again.