That jerk! He just left me! He left me in the middle of the night, in the middle of the woods just like that and I’m having a total meltdown right now. Actually, no, I’m having a tantrum. That striking but super ancient vampire just left without saying goodbye. I had to run after him to see him one last time and he just wooshes away. And what the hell does that even mean? He’ll come back for me soon? Who does he even think he is? I mean sure, he’s some fancy coven leader, but the hot and cold demeanor thing he does is giving me a freaking migraine and now he’s just gone? Okay, fine. To begin with, we're not even in a relationship, but still... We fought side by side and he held my hand the entire time I was recovering after the attack. So, yeah. I think my reaction to this whole thing is valid. I think.
I paced back and forth inside my room trying to calm the raging wolf inside me. What was I expecting anyway? A grand gesture? For him to say that we're mates? I don’t know much about vampires, so I don’t even know if they have mates too. Oh, wait, yeah! Sure they do. I forgot about that for a minute, but how can they tell if someone is their mate and what if for him I’m not his mate? Do their senses work the same way as wolves do when they find their mates? Like can he distinguish the scent of his mate from the rest of the people around him? I really should learn more about vampires soon.
I breathed heavily through my nose as if I was caging in my emotions from spilling out. For normal human beings, this is simply a minor set back. It’s not a big deal because people can work long-distance relationships, but for a wolf such as myself, it’s a painful experience to be far away from his or her mate. It burns like lava. The thing that irritates me the most is while I was keeping an eye on him before we found out about his true identity, the spell, or whatever they call it masked his scent from everyone which is why I didn’t pay much attention to him. Although, I have to admit that he’s an eye candy and his mysterious side always called to me. Then one day, inside our home office, his scent hit me like a forty-foot wave and I just lost it.
I’ve been keeping this a secret for months now, and I feel like I can no longer handle this on my own. But who can I talk to about this? Storm? Amara? My parents? Will they judge me or stop me from pursuing this. And what about, Eric? Does he know that I see him as my mate? If so, will he accept me as his? Gaaah! This is really frustrating.
"I can hear your rapid heartbeat and smell your anger all the way downstairs," Amara said as soon as she entered my room without knocking making me jump a bit. I didn't utter a single word, but instead, I nibbled on the nail of my thumb. Shit. How do I get out of this? She's staring at me like I'm some specimen ready to be dissected. "What's wrong?" she asked concern etched on her face. I shook my head vigorously and sighed. "Nothing." She bit her lip and knitted her brows together. "Dakota Alexandra Black, do I have to compel you to tell me the truth?" My brows shot towards the ceiling in shock. "You can compel people?" I asked in disbelief. "Vampires can, I'm half-vampire, so yeah," she answered with a smirk. "Seriously, though. Will you tell me what's wrong?"
I took my precious time thinking whether or not I should tell her what's eating me up. The truth is, I'm scared of how they're all going to take the news. Like, what if they won't approve at all. Are we going to be the modern-day Romeo and Juliet? Okay, I'm getting off track. When I didn't say anything again, she crossed one leg over the other and did the same with her hands as if she was a prim and proper noble. She waited patiently for me to say something without letting her eyes wander anywhere else. Basically, she just held my panic-state stare like a statue. Her blue eyes stared directly at my gray eyes as if she's trying to read my thoughts and it was unnerving.
I slowly made my way towards my bed and sat next to her. I twisted the hem of my shirt a couple of times before clearing my throat. "I've found my mate," I began and she immediately gasped. I held my hand up to stop her from talking and her mouth closed. Okay... where was I? Ah, yes. "And it's complicated," I finished with a defeated tone. "How so?" she asked letting her hand slip on top of mine as her way of comforting me. God, I love this woman. Every clumsy, sweet, caring, and awkward bit of her.
"It is so because..." I let the words hang while I positioned myself in such a way that I'm directly facing her and she did the same. "He's... well... he's Eric." Her mouth popped open as her eyes danced from side to side as she tried to focus on both my irises. "Come again?" she finally asked looking shocked as hell and I sighed once more. "You heard me." I sounded confident, but that was a far cry from what I'm feeling right now. In fact, I wanted the world to open up and eat me whole so that I don't have to face the days to come.
The side of Amara's lips slanted upwards showing a demure smile. She was definitely keeping her wide grin on the down-low for my benefit. "Did you tell him?" she asked and I shook my head in response. "Why didn't you?" Umm... let me count the ways. I rolled my eyes as I straightened myself back to how I was sitting before. I wasn't really sure if she was just feigning innocence or if she genuinely didn't know the answer to that, so I decided on the latter. "Because like what I've said just now, it's complicated." I huffed before leaning my head on her shoulder to seek comfort because I feel like I'm so screwed right now. Absolutely - irrevocably - unbelievably screwed. Yup, that's me!