Is he ghosting me? Cause it sure feels like it. We haven't talked or texted for two whole months and I'm beginning to get worried and antsy. He's been away for eight months now and for the first five months he's been gone, we had solid communication. We'd talk for hours or send random messages all the time. Almost like two people who are dating long distances. And then one day, it just stopped. I still kept on with the calls, but he never answered them. I even left a bunch of voicemails for weeks. After that, I gave up. I didn't want him to think that I was desperate even though I really was.
Of course, I have no right to be mad because I don't have a claim on him. He may be a mate on my side of things, but I'm not sure if he feels the same about me. The thing is, we never really get to a point where we talk about what's going on between us. Either we're avoiding it or it just doesn't come up. What we usually discuss though are random things like what we plan to do for the day, how our day is going, and what we're supposed to do the next day. We also talk about things we like and dislike. We basically talk about anything except how we feel about each other.
The longer we get to know each other the more I assumed that maybe he likes me too, but now, I'm not so sure anymore. This is far worst than my first breakup. Not that my breakup had me emotionally breaking down or anything. I only had one so far when I was sixteen. To be honest, I was more than fine after that, but breakups are tough I guess. Okay, that was a very poor example, but I guess what I want to say is, this sucks. It really really sucks.
I keep running questions in my head like, did something bad happen to him, or did he suddenly decide that he and I will never work out? I don't understand any of this at all. If it was the latter, the least he could do is to tell me to get lost. I at least deserve that I think. I've been wanting to confide in Amara for days, but the only problem is, I don't want to ruin her vacation with Storm. They must be halfway around the world by now, and whining about her brother is the last thing she needs. Knowing her, she's probably going to go out of her way just so she can try to fix things. It's what my brother finds endearing and exasperating about her, so yeah, I don't want to ruin their romantic bubble. Well, that and the reason that I'm too embarrassed to say something.
I started going about my day like I normally do and that is to grumble at the alarm, take a shower, brush my teeth, put my clothes on, eat breakfast, and head out. The longer I was out, the more agitating my day became. There were no particular reasons as to why I was agitated. I was just feeling extra low today, so by the time I was done handling things at Storm's bar, I decided to volunteer to lead the run around the pack borders in place of Wyatt hoping that it'll help take my mind off things. Thank god, he didn't argue with that. I even hoped to find rogues at some point, so I could blow off some steam. Take all my frustrations out on them, you know? Unfortunately, for me and fortunately for the pack, the night was another peaceful one.
We haven't had any problems with intruders since the big attack which we are all grateful for because it gave us time to rebuild and heal faster. We received a lot of help from neighboring packs as well which was surprising since wolves don't normally extend help unless we're asked to and with good reasons. It was rather touching but at the same time, Storm did say that it was a strategy these days. He said it was "subtle business." You scratch my back I scratch yours kind of thing, but one he welcomed since the packs who helped are good ones. I also learned that they fear Amara in the same way they fear my brother, if not even more once they learned what she is. To them, she's like the most powerful being or something. Little do they know that my best friend and my future sister-in-law is the clumsiest most awkward luna there is, but we love her dearly.
I didn't feel like going back home after patrolling, so I informed everyone that I feel like doing more laps. I raced around the woods and through the fields at full speed until I ended up in the middle of the clearing where I last saw Eric. I immediately stopped as soon as I realized where I was and a new sadness washed over me. My god, I was acting like a love-sick sentimental fool. I was heaving hard and very close to crying, so I changed back to my human form before I start howling and whimpering for everyone to hear.
I stood smack in the middle staring at the moon all naked and lonely. It was like a scene from a particular sad romance film where the woman who was left behind was about to break down and cry her heart out. The thought at least made me laugh a bit. I took a deep breath and immediately opened my eyes. What in the world? Are my senses fooling me now? I abruptly turned to where the scent was the strongest and as soon as my eyes landed on the figure of a man standing a meter away from me, I gasped in surprise.
There he was, Eric, staring back at me. I wanted to cover my nakedness, but then I think that'll be more embarrassing, so I owned up to it and just stood there not knowing what to do. I wanted to throw myself into his arms as much as I want to punch his gut, but I couldn't move, not when he's looking at me with such intensity. I simply stood with my hands to my sides and I've never felt so alive, loved, and desired. He came back
"Little one, it's been a while."